


When two worlds collide

by WinteryFall



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Big Secrets, Blood and Violence, Bloody Fights, Confused Ichigo, Eventual Happy Ending, Flirting, Friendship, Grimmjow goes crazy too, Grimmjow is a dick, Grimmjow is a grumpycat, Grimmjow will try to smack him out of it, Grimmjow wrecks some shit, Helpful Ichigo might be over his head, Ichigo is not what he thinks he is, Ichigo will start going crazy eventually, Insanity, Kidnapping, Kitty Pantera, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Minor Character Death, Panic Attacks, Past Character Death, Past secrets, Plot Twists, Scifi influences, Seizures, Slow Burn, Trauma, Uncontrollable violent fits, backhanded compliments, from reluctant friends to lovers, past trauma, underground fight clubs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2018-12-18 08:01:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 134,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11870043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinteryFall/pseuds/WinteryFall
Summary: During a relatively routine trip to get medication for a sick sibling, young Ichigo runs into an injured, disoriented woman in the middle of the street at night. Little does he know, this sudden meeting has huge implications to his life. Even less expected was the fact just how close he manages to get with the woman's aggressive, overprotective brother.However, as his bond with the crude and sarcastic, yet frustratingly charming blue haired bastard grows, It turns out he was connected to these two siblings long before he knew it himself.In the end, perhaps it is not them who will need saving, but Ichigo himself.





	1. chance meeting

**Author's Note:**

> oookayyy...sooo...  
> I was bit by a nostalgia bug, and re-watched old Bleach episodes as well as read the manga. After that, this story idea popped in my head and well...I just had to start writing it. It's also good to have some variety in the characters I write about, at least personally.  
> This'll be an interesting challenge, as even when writing from a modern AU, I still need to re-research some stuff about the characters as I cannot remember them all clearly.

The streets of the Karakura Town were quiet, though they would usually be around this time of the night; majority of the clubs and everything were closed at this point.

Ichigo had not had a choice; his sister had broken with a fever two in the morning, and for some reason their home-clinic had no medicine, so Ichigo had hurried to the nearest place he knew would be open around this time.

Well, not open, but he knew the owner and knew the man would be awake.  
Urahara had been a little surprised to see Ichigo around this late, but quickly got him the medicine needed upon hearing how sick Yuzu had gotten. 

For all his peculiarities and strange fashion-sense, Urahara was a good man, sometimes willing to help Ichigo’s family for free given he and Isshin were longtime friends.

He was now hurrying back towards his home, hoping that Yuzu’s fever had not gotten too bad so that she would have to be brought to an actual hospital.

 

Then, as the teen turns a corner, he suddenly stops.

There was...there was a young woman lying on the ground, near the doorway to a closed down shop. 

Her green cardigan was torn and there was blood under her head.  
She was barefoot too, as if she’d ran from somewhere in a hurry. It was such a bizarre sight that Ichigo could not decide what to make of it.  
”Hey, are you alright?” He questions out loud, but gains no answer from the woman, making him frown in concern.  
Ichigo walks to the girl and crouches next to her, carefully touching her neck to feel her pulse. He could hear her breathing, and there was a recognizable beat under Ichigo’s fingers.   
Still, that head-wound would need addressing before she bled to death.

Suddenly, the girl yelps and sits up abtruptly, backing away against the wall while she stared at startled Ichigo with widened eyes.

For a moment neither of them spoke, both of the two clearly spooked by the other.

”Who are you...You’re not pesche..” She mutters out; her tone sounded confused, as if she expected somebody else, and Ichigo did not know what to make of it. As he examined the woman closely, who now touched the small cut on her head and flinched, Ichigo felt like she was not fully aware of where she was. He also noted that there was a stain on the edge of the stairs leading up to the shop door, indicating that she’d slipped and hit her head to it, hence the cut.

”I...”

Before he could say or ask anything however, Ichigo could hear footsteps hurrying towards them, and the next thing he knew, the boy was violently yanked aside by someone, who stepped between him and the woman.

Ichigo looks up startled.

At least six feet tall, blue haired male stood in front of him with electric blue eyes that were currently burning a hole trough his skull.  
”What the hell are you trying, bastard?!” He spats at Ichigo’s face still grasping his arm painfully.  
”I was just...”

The man ignores him, and turns to kneel down beside the woman.

”Yo, Nel, you hear me?”

The girl turns her gaze at him unsure, as if she did not recognize the man at first.   
Then, her lips break into cautious smile.

”Grimmy?”

The man looks like he wants to roll his eyes or groan, but just forces a smile on his face.  
”Yeah. It’s me. C’mon, let’s go back home.”  
”But Pesche...”

He grasps her shoulders, and looks at her straight in the eyes.  
”He would not be around this late at night. Come on, Tia’s worried.”  
The green eyed woman’s eyes widen, and then she turns sad, looking like a guilty child.

”I don’t want Tia to be worried.”

”Then let’s go home, yeah?”

Ichigo watches this bizarre exchange quiet, wondering what was going on.   
”Uh...her head might need some checking; it seems to have a cut on it.”  
The blue haired man turns to glare at Ichigo with a ’no-shit’ expression. Ichigo had never seen such piercing blue eyes in his life; it was like they were made from liquid blue lightning.

He helps the girl - Nel - up carefully, and she clings to the man, looking around with extremely confused face. The blood was still dripping down her face, but the man holding her brushes it away with his thumb. 

”Where...am I?”  
”Near the shopping district. It’s bloody two-thirty in the morning.”

The woman looks up at the blue haired man baffled, as if she had no memory of coming there.  
Ichigo could not stop but look at her concerned; she seemed very spooked right now. 

Strangely enough, she was clearly not afraid of the man holding her despite the fact he looked like your average violent asshole with his intense, narrowed eyes, and sharp canines that were visible the second he growled or sneered at somebody; in fact, it seemed like a default reaction towards people in general from this guy. 

”I...I don’t remember...”

”Let’s just get home so we can fix your cut.” The man states calmly, and the woman now reaches at her hairline again, as if she’d forgotten there was a cut on her forehead.  
”Our home-clinic is nearby, you could bring her there.”

The blue eyes instantly zero in on Ichigo, and the stranger was clearly measuring him, trying to deduce his ulterior motive or something along those lines.

Whoever this girl was, the tall male was clearly protective over her.  
It was...kind of good to know, as otherwise Ichigo would’ve been even more concerned for the dazed lady, and he had a feeling getting into a fight with this blue haired bastard was not a good idea.

”Why the hell would you wanna help?” The man growls lowly and Ichigo steps back a bit, feeling uneasy under that gaze. 

He’d seen vicious lions with gentler eyes in nature documentaries.  
Hell, a rabid dog looked like a cuddly puppy compared to this man right now.

”Because it’s kind of our job? Because she clearly needs stitches and our clinic really is just two blocks away?”  
The green haired woman gazes at Ichigo, then tugs at the man’s sleeve, gaining his attention.  
”Let’s go Grimmy; he seems nice.”

”Yeah, Nel, I’m totally trusting your judgment when you barely know where the hell you are.” The man snorts, gaining a hurt look from the girl, who makes him grimace immediately, looking almost guilty.

”You don’t have to if you really don’t want to; it’s just an option. My fam’s awake anyway as my sister is sick.”

The blue eyes zero in on him again, this time with a strange unreadable expression.  
After a moment, he nods much to Ichigo’s surprise.  
”Fine.”

 

The man did not talk much, just watched as Ichigo helped to stitch the girl’s face - Nel, her full name was Nelliel apparently - while his younger sister Karin helped out the best she could. Isshin was worrying over sick Yuzu in her room, though he had acknowledged that Ichigo had brought a patient to the clinic, announcing that she would be treated free-of-charge given the time of the night.

It was a little hard, working when such an intense glare was aimed at Ichigo’s back, but he kept his focus on what he was doing. The green haired girl looked at him curiously, often glancing at his brightly colored hair especially. Ichigo was used to people pointing it out so it did not bother him that much. 

Plus the two clearly had stranger hair tones than he did.

”There.” He says as he finally finishes, tying a bandage around her head. Ichigo had noted a bigger scar hidden by her long hair, but the second he spotted it, the glare aimed at him had intensified tenfold, so Ichigo had not said anything and pretended he did not see it.

”You should be more careful when running in the rain next time, miss.” Karin scolds the girl gently, who blinks and looks at her with that same confused look for a moment, before smiling almost sadly.

”Yes, my brother always tells me to be more careful.”

That comment gains a snort from the blue man, indicating he was the said brother.  
It wasn’t that surprising, given the fact they both had equally unusual appearances.

”You never fuckin’ listen.” 

Ichigo glances at the blue eyed man, now noticing how tired he looked; there were bags under his eyes, and his eyelids were drooping. He must’ve been up late, looking for the woman for quite a while now. That honestly explained his attitude right now a bit, so Ichigo decided not to take his chilly behavior personally.

”We can give you a ride home.” Karin offers, noticing the same thing as Ichigo did, but the blue eyed man shakes his head rubbing his eyes.  
”Tia’s out there. I’ll just call her to pick us up.”

The mention of that name made the green haired girl look guilty again, and she gazes at her hands in her lap.

”She will be mad at me huh?”

”Fuck no. I am fucking mad at you for this stunt, that’s for sure, but she won’t be. Yer her precious little princess, so of course she won’t call you out for this bullcrap!”

His harsh tone made the green haired girl flinch a little, and Ichigo looks at the man with a disapproving frown; no matter how tired he was, the man should not spat at his sister like this seeing how upset she was already. 

The blue haired male just returns Ichigo’s stare with an angry scowl, almost challenging the boy to say something. Ichigo doesn’t, knowing it was not worth getting into an argument with a stranger this late, which was clearly extremely tired and cranky right now. 

”Try not to move around too much for a day or so; you might have a concussion.” Ichigo instructs gently, and the girl nods, still glancing at her brother guiltily.  
”I’m sorry...” she mumbles out, and Ichigo half expects the man to throw another set of bitchy words at her, but he just sighs. 

”I’ll call Tia. Where the hell is this place?” He asks from Ichigo, who gives the man the address. The blue haired man walks out and dials the number, before digging out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket alongside a lighter and smoking one.

”He’s just worried for you; Ichi-nii would be like this too if one of us got hurt.” Karin rushes to comfort the lady who still watched after her brother with a sad, guilty look.

”I would not be that harsh and rude.” Ichigo points out annoyed, not liking the fact he was being compared to the blue bastard.

”No, your sister is right. Grimmjow tends to say things he doesn’t always mean when he gets angry.” The woman comments softly, now sounding a bit less childlike as she brushes through her long hair.

Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that; the man sure had a wicked name, somehow matching the near feral look in his eyes. 

”Still, that outburst was rather uncalled for.” He comments after watching the man speak on the phone for a while. 

”No, it’s...understandable. He’s had to deal with my...seizures for years now, he’s understandably tired.” Nel smiles sadly, hugging herself a bit. Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that, but before he could ask anything, Grimmjow walks back inside, still looking pissy as hell.

”Tia’ll be here in fifteen minutes; don’t fucking go running off again, I’m not looking for you anymore tonight.”  
Nel just nods, avoiding his gaze.

Ichigo wanted to smack the man and yell at him for his wording; the green haired girl was obviously feeling bad already and had some sort of issues based on what she’d said, having her brother be a bloody jerk would not help her at all.

”You got a problem, twink?” The man grunts at him, and Ichigo glares back at the bastard for his insult, but still holds his tongue. The young Kurosaki was not going to let his sharp words loose when Karin was right there beside him, looking between the two uneasy. Plus, he did not want to upset Nel either, yelling at her brother over this would not help her state of mind for sure.

Grimmjow still held the burning cigarette in his hand, and Ichigo sternly tells him to turn it off as this was technically a hospital.  
The man just snorts, and then blows the smoke right at his face, making Ichigo cough and his eyes water. 

”Bite me.” Grimmjow comments with a slight smirk, bringing the offending thing back to his lips.

God Ichigo wanted to smack this asshole so bad, but did not want to do so in front of his sister.

Eventually, a white car appears in front of the house, with a blond woman driving it. Grimmjow helps his sister up and aids her to the back seat.

Nel turns to watch at the Kurosaki siblings on the door one last time, thanking them with a smile.   
Once the man closes the door after Nel, he also turns to look at them.   
He then flicks the cigarette towards them, nearly hitting Ichigo in the head.  
The orange haired male glares at him, but the man just smirks and sits at the front seat, before they drive off. 

Just what the fuck was his problem, anyway?

”Wow...she’s nice, he’s an ass. How the heck are they related?”   
Karin pretty much summarized the two, before looking up at Ichigo.

”I think we should go to bed; dad said he’ll watch after Yuzu.”  
Ichigo just nods, still glaring at the direction the car went. 

 

”Wow, what an asshole.” Renji comments after Ichigo finished his story. They were currently sitting at their usual spot in the university’s yard, enjoying the spring weather and eating their lunches. Ichigo had mentioned about last night’s strange occurrence to his friends, who had naturally wanted to know the whole story. 

As expected, majority of them were concerned for Nel, and appalled by Grimmjow’s attitude.  
The only one who was a bit more empathetic was Inoue, predictably; she’d always been the most perspective out of them all.

”Well...if he really has to deal with her doing things like that a lot, and having to search for her late at night...I can see why he would turn kind of irritated. He must have been really tired.”

Yeah, Nelliel had hinted at that too. It still did not make Grimmjow’s behavior okay.

”Still, you should have seen how Nel flinched when he spat at her. It doesn’t matter how angry you get, you should not do that when your family member is distressed!” Ichigo argues, feeling very strongly about this, being a big brother himself; he’d NEVER act like that towards Yuzu or Karin, no matter how upset he’d get with them. 

”Well, you barely know them or their relationship; perhaps that is normal in their household.” Ishida joins in, adjusting his glasses a bit.

”Well if that’s normal, then I double-worry for the girl.” Rukia comments thoughtfully, crossing her arms with a frown. She really did not like the harsh mannerism Ichigo had described, especially not, given how the girl had seemed heavily disoriented about her whereabouts and what she was doing at the time, based on Ichigo’s description.  
Sure, her big brother could be a little distant and come off as less-than-stellar brother material, but Byakua would never be this rude towards her. He was just bad at showing his soft side. 

”Even so...he was almost nice at first, right Kurosaki-kun?” Inoue asks softly, and Ichigo blinks, thinking back to the start of his story. 

Yeah, Grimmjow had initially been kind of gentle towards her, turning nasty only after they’d come to the clinic where Nel’s head seemingly cleared further. The shift had been kind of abrupt, and as Ichigo thought further on it, it had clearly happened the second Nelliel was no longer like a scared child.  
Perhaps Ichigo was judging the man too hard? He’d clearly waited with his outburst until his sibling was no longer that volatile.

 

”Makes you wonder though; what exactly was going on with her? Why was this girl out there late at night, barefoot of all things?” Rukia mutters out, holding her chin thoughtfully; she was admittedly intrigued by this strange occurrence.

Ichigo had to agree, he’d wondered the same thing. It seemed like she’d been either looking for, or expecting someone. 

Was this someone a person that actually existed though? Ichigo wasn’t too sure.   
Before they could ponder this any further, the bell rang, informing them that the lunchtime was over, and the group heads back to their classes.

 

Grimmjow was not happy.

Hell, he rarely was nowadays, but today especially he felt like breaking someone’s neck.  
It was the fourth time this week Nelliel had been delusional and third time he’d had to look for her throughout the night. 

He was fucking tired of this shit. 

”You know she can’t help it.” Harribel scolds the grumbling man calmly, as he lights another cigarette. They were both sitting on the kitchen table, while the green haired woman slept in her bedroom. Grimmjow glances towards her, confirming that the damned woman was indeed safely tucked in and not running herself sick out in the cold air again. 

”I know that, for fuck’s sake; I just can’t be searching for her every other night!” Grimmjow growls at the woman, who doesn’t even flinch at his angry tone. Harribel was far too used to the man’s intense temper to care. 

”I did tell you we should probably bring her...”

”No.” The man grunts instantly, gaining a sigh from the blond woman; she knew how much Grimmjow distrusted hospitals, especially mental asylums after what had happened, but if they did not get Nelliel further expertise care, the next one to go mad in this household would be Jeagerjaquez, and that was a terrifying thought. 

Perhaps he was already a little insane; it was hard to tell honestly. 

The man takes another drag from his cigarette, and his mind drifts back to the young orange haired kid they met; he did not even know why, but something about him pissed Grimmjow off to no end. 

There was this ’higher-than-thou’ aura that surrounded the kid the whole time, and he was clearly disapproving of the way Grimmjow had spat at Nel, even though the fucking brat did not know the shit he had to go through with that woman!

It’s not like he didn’t know how his words had been overly harsh, said out of frustration. 

He did not need some brown-eyed brat to rub it in his face, that he’d ended up being a dick to a person he cared for, something Grimmjow tried his damnest NOT to do. It was hard given his violent nature, granted, but he was trying for fuck’s sake!

”You two got lucky there was somebody with medical expertise around that late.”  
”Yeah, medical expertise my ass; all the kid did was patch the small cut on her face.”  
”Still, that was nice of him, especially doing it for free.” Harribel points out, gaining an expected snort and roll of eyes from Grimmjow. 

”Coulda done that myself back home.”  
”His home clinic was closer.”

”Fuck off Tia, I’m not on the mood.” He grumbles, gaining a long look from the woman, before she sighs and gets up. It was about time she headed for work at the local club anyway.  
”Get some sleep too, Grimmjow; you look exhausted.”  
The man just grunts at her again, blowing some smoke out.   
The woman sighs, before heading out from the door.


	2. Breakdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo runs into the troubled siblings again, and witnesses first hand that perhaps it is not Nel who is the most troubled one.   
> Grimmjow has another shitty day, basically.

Ichigo did not expect himself to see the mismatched sibling pair again anytime soon, but he’d been proven wrong; it had only been two days since the last meeting, when he came in contact with them again.

This time though, it was Grimmjow who was injured.

He’d been on a bike accident, a car had turned in front of him while he’d been driving, knocking him off the bike. This, by chance, happened nearby the Kurosaki clinic, so Isshin had brought the young man there as it was faster than a hospital. 

He’d been very reluctant to do so, but due to his excessive head-injury and overall bruising, he had not been able to resist much, ready to topple over or vomit due to his concussion. 

Ichigo was now forced to treat his injuries while his dad informed Grimmjow’s sister and the blond haired friend about the accident with the number he’d reluctantly given out.

The reason why Ichigo was forced to stitch his wounds and dress them was because Isshin had spent last few days with sick Yuzu, and did not want to transfer any potential germs on the patient. 

Another reason was that Ichigo did not really want his dad to have to deal with this rude asshole and his crudeness. 

Ichigo could handle it. Not that his dad couldn’t, but the thought of Isshin having to listen to the blue haired bastard complaining just did not sit right with the young man.   
He was probably overprotective, but that’s what he’d always been when it came to his family.

The orange haired young man was currently stitching up a cut on Grimmjow’s back, and was not that surprised to find out he had tattoos hidden beneath his clothing; a panther-like shape on his left shoulder blade, and a number six at his lower abdomen in his back. 

”Fuckin’ bastard. Can thank his luck I didn’t sock him in the fucking jaw.” The man mumbles, clearly referring to the driver of the car. His speech was slightly slurred, probably due to his concussion, but the anger was clear in his voice regardless.

The car owner had been rather upset over the dent on his new vehicle, but the guy had technically been in the wrong, not looking out for the oncoming traffic. As much as Ichigo did not have a good first impression on Grimmjow, he could understand that sentiment and anger the man was going through right now.

”Well, it takes two to tango; you should have looked out as well.” Ichigo comments regardless of his thoughts, and the man snorts at him.

”Yeah, pin this on me, that’s what you prudes always do.”  
Ichigo pauses, the needle hovering over the toned skin.   
His expression was miffed.

”I doubt it is prude to have some manners and common decency.”

”When you see enough shit, stuff like that stops meaning a thing.”

”So that allows you to snap at your sister?”

Grimmjow finally turns to look at Ichigo over his shoulder, his eyes in a deep frown.   
His next words come out almost as a snarl.  
”My family business is none of yours, brat.”

”Then perhaps you should not make it look like it should be.” Ichigo challenges, his gaze unwavering from the blue eyes. The color would have been almost pretty if it was not attached to a man who glared at him like his very existence offended him. 

”I had been awake for 24 hours, straight. This was the third or fourth fucking time she did it, and her Girlfriend was bloody freaking out when she called me. I was bloody tired from running around this entire goddamn town so of course I was gonna snap at her.”

”You did not, at first anyway.” Ichigo points out, and the man’s eyes narrow slightly as his muscles tense under Ichigo’s touch. He seemed ready to punch the younger male, based on the way he was clutching the edges of the hospital bed he was sitting on. He probably would not be able to, given his concussion. The thought of the man throwing up on him was no more appealing though.

”Of course I was not gonna yell at her when she acted like a scared lil’ animal! She would’ve ran off and started the whole fucking thing all over again!”

Ichigo says nothing to that, and for a moment the two glares at each other quiet.

Then, a familiar figure bursts through the door and nearly tackles Grimmjow, hugging him tightly.  
Ichigo watches in slight surprise as the green haired woman embraces her brother so tightly that he nearly turned as blue as his hair.

”Nel, let him breathe.” The blonde woman comments gently, and the girl backs away instantly, looking apologetic. Grimmjow just cracks his neck, seemingly not bothered.  
”She was very worried when she heard the news.” Harribel explains with her usual calm tone, gaining a roll of eyes from Grimmjow.  
”Of course she was.”

The aforementioned girl looks up at Ichigo, her eyes still wide with concern.

”Given how much he’s been cursing and being a general nuisance, I’d say he’s fine.”  
For Ichigo’s surprise, the blue haired man actually laughs at that, a rough, tired laugh that spoke of mental exhaustion rather than physical. It almost felt like the presence of his family eased the earlier hostile atmosphere around Grimmjow.

”Yer welcome.” He smirks at Ichigo, making the younger male feel a little funny.   
Who the hell changed moods this fast? Was the guy bipolar or suffering from some sort of delayed puberty?  
Probably not the latter, given how deep his voice was, and he looked to be past his twenties already. 

After finally stitching rest of the wounds up, he informed the two ladies that it would be the best if he did not move much for couple of days to let his injuries heal.  
”Though, I suspect he is thick-headed enough to go and get into another crash within the first few hours.”

Harribel sighs, brushing through her hair.  
”If only you knew how correct you were, Ichigo Kurosaki.”  
Grimmjow just rolls his eyes at that. 

 

”I must thank you for putting up with him again.” Harribel commends Ichigo as Nelliel escorts her injured brother at the white car the blond woman owned. 

”Yeah, well. It’s my job really, to help the injured. Even if they are a jerk.” Ichigo mutters, rubbing his head awkwardly. Something about this woman made him a little fidgety. Harribel had a certain kind of presence to her that demanded a level of respect, even if she was being polite.

”He’s....been having rough couple of years.”   
Harribel admits, glancing at the two siblings who were currently bickering over who should sit at the front seat. 

”....his sister?” Ichigo could not stop himself from asking; the bizarre way the woman had acted, and her cryptic words still weighed heavily in Ichigo’s mind.

He then instantly bites his lip, wondering if he should have asked, it was a private matter after all.  
The woman doesn’t seem offended as she hums a bit. It seems that Nelliel had won the argument, forcing her brother to sit on the more comfortable front-seat instead of hers.

”You don’t need to have me on your field of vision 24/7 Grimmy. Harribel is with us too, remember?” The woman scolded the grumbling blue haired man, who sat on the front seat with his arms crossed.

”Yes. What happened to Nel hit him hard. Even if he doesn’t like admitting it.”  
Ichigo chose not to ask what exactly happened; it was none of his business.

 

Grimmjow was not having a good day.  
Again.

First, Nel had had one of her episodes again, crying out for people who would never come back, and then he’d gotten into a fight with a bunch of thugs just because he was so angry right now.  
After Nelliel had finally calmed down and fallen back to sleep, Grimmjow had headed out for a drink, only to run into a bunch of guys looking for trouble.

Yeah, he’d won that fight as per usual, but now his mood was even worse than before.  
It did not help that Harribel’s co-workers slash friends bitched at him for finishing the fight basically at the bar’s backyard.

They did not try to throw him out however; they knew he was too strong for them to even bother trying. One could say they were a bit afraid of him. 

Given how even Tia was a little cautious of Grimmjow, and she could potentially deck him, it was understandable. It was not his strength that freaked people like Tia Harribel out; it was his unpredictability.

Grimmjow was downing his sixth drink now, annoyed how little buzz it caused in his head; his tolerance was near inhuman levels nowadays. The good thing was that due to his...enhancements, the concussion he’d suffered from had vanished within few hours, and even the cuts the kid had stitched were near healed by now.

”You don’t look too good today, Grimmjow-san.”  
It was the old man who owned the bar, Shawlong or so. He was currently cleaning a beer glass in his hand while idling near Grimmjow. 

”I assume this has something to do with young Nelliel.”  
”No shit. Why do you think Harribel ain’t around?”

The woman had decided to stay behind for today, watching after Nelliel. Grimmjow sometimes couldn’t understand how she did it, being able to be so calm despite the person she held dear being in a state like this. Then again, he’d always been the one with a temper, whereas Tia seemed like she was made of ice. Always so calm and chill and shit, it almost annoyed him. 

”She did inform me she would not be coming today. I must say, I was surprised to see you around here today.” 

One could assume the man was scolding Grimmjow for not being there for his sister right now, but he knew the old man better than that. He was simply observing, and understood Grimmjow’s need to get away for a bit just to settle down.

He did not want Nel to see any of his truly angry outbursts, because they fucking scared her. 

”Perhaps you should really consider getting her professional help.”  
”I told you already old man; even if I wanted to, we can’t fuckin’ afford it.”  
The man hums, still cleaning the glass that had to be stain-free by now.  
”Are you sure it’s the money that is the issue?”

Yeah, Grimmjow couldn’t deny it, it was more than that. Last time they’d put her into a mental hospital, she’d just gotten hurt worse due to the corrupt fuckers who ran the place. He did not trust another medical facility again with her care.

He could still remember her face when he’d found Nelliel by his door six years ago, barefoot, looking like a sad beaten puppy. Grimmjow could not recall ever being so angry ever before or since, and that was a feat given how dangerously flammable his temper was. 

Nel had been a happy, smart kid if a bit oblivious and naive. Ever since that day however, she’d began to act erratic, closing into herself and spouting nonsense at randomly. He and Tia had thought that sending her to professional care would have helped.

Instead, she’d been ’treated’ by testing questionable methods on her, which made shit worse so he’d put his foot down and refused to let Nel go back to the shithole. It wasn’t a huge surprise, in the eyes of many they were nobodies, people who did not matter.

Sometime afterwards, there’d been this huge corruption scandal regarding to that specific hospital, but Grimmjow had not paid attention to it anymore, he knew the place was rotten.

 

So, for the past five years or so, he and Tia had both sort of lived in this limbo of not doing anything. Neither of them knew what to do, after their trust with the system had been broken.

All this thinking of hospitals caused his mind to drift towards the orange haired kid.

Grimmjow did not know why Ichigo irked him so much, there was just something about the kid that rubbed him the wrong way. He did not particularly enjoy the fact a random person could bother him this much, but the man couldn’t help himself.

It also did not help that the brat had the gall to complain to him about the way he’d spat at his sister, when what he’d said then wasn’t even close to the worst he could be towards Nel, if he allowed himself to, which Grimmjow never did. Sure, there was no way the brat would’ve known that, but still.

No matter how angry or frustrated he got, he never let Nelliel see just how much of a monster her brother could be. She didn’t have to see that shit on top of everything else. 

 

As if cue, the door to the bar opens, and for his further irritation, he spots a familiar patch of orange hair. 

The kid was there with couple of his pals, a red haired moron with weird eyebrows, a shortie dark haired girl who was berating the redhead for something, a big, quiet guy who looked like a foreigner, and a long haired chick who just screamed the same kind of naivety Nel did, that he almost wanted to smack her for it. 

Grimmjow turns his gaze aside, trying to ignore the happy chatting behind him for now.

”I’ve never been to this part of the town.” The orange haired girl admits, looking around in the bar a bit uncomfortable. Honestly, why the hell was she even here?   
She looked so fucking out of place. 

Hell, Nel had been here before and even she looked like she should not be here with her childlike face. 

”I don’t think any of us have, but it’s good to try new things!” The redhead laughs out sheepishly, sounding like he was already a bit drunk.   
Tsch, lightweight. 

The group sits on a table at the corner, and one of the girls - Sung sung or whatever the hell her name was - goes to snatch their orders.

As he keeps listening to their chat, Grimmjow noted they were celebrating something.  
”Come on Ichigo, chin up, it’s your twentieth birthday!” The short girl comments cheerfully, patting the said male’s back. 

Twenty, huh?   
Coulda fooled him, the kid looked younger than that.  
He was still seven years younger than Grimmjow though.   
So, still a kid in his eyes.

”You know it’s kind of hard for me when Yuzu’s still feeling unwell...”  
Yuzu?   
Grimmjow dug through his memory.

Oh yeah, there was that sick girl coughing her lungs out the first time he dropped by the kid’s family clinic. It had been what, a week or two since then.   
She really had to be sick if that was still going.   
Being a big brother, he sort of got the kid’s mood right now, and also hated the fact he could sympathize with the orange haired little shit. 

The blue haired man gulps down his drink, asking Shawlong to fill his glass, which the man did without objection, despite the amount Grimmjow had drunk already.

”I know you are concerned, Kurosaki-kun, but your dad is taking good care of her I’m sure.” The orange haired girl reassures her friend. For fuck’s sake, she even sounded like some naive little brat, just like Nel. 

Grimmjow groans softly and rubs his eyes, getting up to wash his face in the restroom. 

He’d come here to forget about his sister for a moment - as bad as it sounded, he seriously needed some fresh air now - not be reminded of her constantly.

Grimmjow lingered there for a while, staring at his reflection from the mirror as he leaned over the sink. Yeah, he seriously needed a break; his eyes were sunk, bags under them like he hadn’t slept in ages, and the tone of his skin had a sickly pale hue to it instead of the usual healthy tan. 

He had a permanent scowl to his face, the kind that it was now hard to tell when he was genuinely angry. Then again, he did feel constantly angry. At least back in the day he’d managed to put his face into a default ’resting-bitch’ mode, but now he couldn’t even do that.

After a moment, Grimmjow could hear some commotion on the way that led to the bathrooms. It sounded like some sort of argument, and soon enough, Grimmjow sighs, checking on what it was.

As he peeks from the doorway, sure enough, it was the orange haired girl, who was currently being bothered by some drunken bastard, who was trying to make moves on her.

”Please sir, I really need to use the restroom.” She tries kindly to deflect him, but the man was persistent, grabbing her backside uncomfortably.  
”Come on now; I am sure I’d be much more interesting company than that bunch of kiddos you came in with.”

Grimmjow watches the girl struggle for a moment, and then glances at the said table. Nobody had seemingly noticed her trouble yet, which was understandable given the angle and the wall concealing the bathrooms from sight.

After a moment, the blue haired man releases another long-suffering breath of air, and walks there, grabbing the drunken guy’s arm.

”Oi. No means no, asswipe.”

The drunkard stumbles around, staring at him with an angry, unfocused glare.   
”Mind your own business!” The man spats at him, his breath stinking of alcohol and tries to score him in the jaw. Grimmjow just stops his fist tiredly, and then twists the man’s arm until it dislocates, and he stumbles to the ground with a pained yelp.

The woman gasps, covering her mouth in shock as she sees this, and Grimmjow looks up at her annoyed. 

”This kinda shit happens all the time here.” He comments curtly, then starts dragging the whimpering man across the floor, towards the exit. Surely enough, he turns a lot of heads, but the regulars knew not to intervene, as Grimmjow had done this kind of thing before.  
It was a regular occurence to see the blue haired man drag some sorry bastard out of the bar for misbehaving.

The one who did do something however, is the orange haired male, who stops him with a frown.

”What are you doing?”

Grimmjow grunts and turns to look at the boy - Ichigo - with an annoyed glare.  
”This guy was tryin’ ta molest yer friend over there, so I’m throwing the fucker out.”  
Ichigo blinks, and then turns to look at Orihime with widened eyes. The girl was still standing at the entranceway to the bathroom section, her eyes mimicking the orange haired kid.

Grimmjow uses this opportunity and walks to the door, literally throwing the guy out into a puddle on the street.

”Fuck off.” He says curtly, before slamming the door closed again, walking to his seat with hands in his pockets. 

The kid and his friends had already crowded their damsel in distress, asking if she was okay.   
Grimmjow snorts at the sight, and continues drinking.   
After a moment, he could feel a presence next to him.  
It was Ichigo.

”Thanks. Orihime is not good at telling people off.”

He offers the man a genuine smile and his hand, but Grimmjow just grunts, ignoring him.  
”Then don’t drag her around these parts moron. She’ll get mugged or worse.”  
The orange haired kid was clearly miffed by his dismissal, but let it be for now, walking back to his friends.

Grimmjow could tell the kid kept glancing at him though.

 

”What did he say?” Rukia asks upon noticing Ichigo’s face as he returns to their table.  
”He’s still rude as expected.” Ichigo sighs, rubbing his hair.

”Seriously. What is his problem?” Renji questions while peering at the blue haired male. He could never understand anybody to be such an ass to his friend for no reason. Ichigo was an amazing friend. Sure, he could be a hard-headed idiot, but Renji knew all too well he was one too, so he never held it against Ichigo. 

”I suppose he was born a jerk.” Ichigo concludes, also glancing towards the man.

If he was honest, though, the teen could not quite decide on what to think. 

During these few meetings with the man, he’d been mainly harsh and crude, but Ichigo could still recall the genuine concern and protectiveness he’d witnessed during the very first moments, when he’d shoved Ichigo off his sister. 

It had been a moment of pure instinct, one of those situations where a person’s true self often shone through, which in this case made Ichigo question the man’s behavior.  
He could not get over the fact just how... tired the man seemed all the time.   
As if he was in constant state of mental exhaustion, which made him snap at people so easily.

His compassionate side could not stop but wonder what it was.

Suddenly, just as he was about to turn his head back to join his friend’s conversation, a familiar looking blond woman suddenly bursts in from the door and walks to Grimmjow, face in a concerned frown.

”Grimmjow.”  
The blue haired male groans and looks up at her.  
”What now?”

She just gave him a look, and the man curses out loudly, getting up. 

Ichigo and his friends watch after the two confused; something was clearly up now.  
The second the woman had given him the look, a flash of concern had appeared in Grimmjow’s face before he got out with her.

Without really thinking, Ichigo suddenly got up and hurried after the two, leaving his friends yell after him confused. The young man reached the two who’d just reached the woman’s car.  
”Hey! What’s wrong?”

The two turn to look at him, Harribel lightly surprised, whereas Grimmjow looked like he wanted to punch Ichigo in the face. To be fair, that seemed to be his default expression. 

”The hell you want, kid?” He growls, but the way he was shifting indicated he wanted to get going to do whatever they were going to.   
”...It’s your sister, right?”  
Grimmjow goes completely still for a moment, eyeing Ichigo dubiously. Finally, he nods.

”I had to go out to get Grimmjow’s cat some food, and she’d managed to skip the house while I was gone.”  
”You should have waited till I came back!” Grimmjow spat at her instantly, but the woman gives him a stern look.

”You were not coming back anytime soon based on the amount you’ve drank, and your cat was getting restless. Besides, the shop was right behind the corner and she was in a deep sleep when I left.”

Grimmjow grunted, suddenly aware that his breath probably stank of alcohol noticeably.  
”Let us help then.”

The two turn to look at Ichigo, who seemed to be surprised of his own offer as well. He shakes his head however and holds his resolve, focusing his gaze on the tired blue eyes. Ichigo had a feeling the blond haired woman would be glad for extra help, but it was clear the man was harder to convince.

”Three pair of eyes is more than two.”  
”Make that seven.”

Ichigo turns, finding his friends now stand behind him; Rukia was looking at them with a deep frown in her face, and she was also looking at Grimmjow almost challenging.

”We could use extra help.” Harribel comments to him simply, but the man just remains quiet, staring back at Ichigo who’d began to fidget almost nervously under his gaze.   
Finally, he rubs his eyes with a curse.  
”Fine.”  
The brat had the gall to look surprised. 

 

The group heads out, searching for the green haired girl all over the city. They mainly remained nearby Grimmjow’s apartment, as Nel probably did not go that far.

Harribel had taken the car, looking from further away just in case, whereas rest of them walked on by foot. The blue haired man was currently accompanied with the girl he’d saved earlier, who kept glancing at him with that frown.

Eventually, he loses his cool and stops, turning to glare at her.  
”What?”  
”I just...Ichigo was genuinely trying to thank you.”

”He didn’t need to bother; I do that shit every other day there.” Grimmjow grunts, cracking his neck. He really did not want to chat with this woman; he had to find Nel before she got herself in trouble, or worse.

”I’m sure one of us will spot her.” She comments softly after a moment of silence, actually trying to comfort him despite clearly a little unnerved by his intimidating aura.  
Ain’t that a riot? 

”Better, cause I’m not on the mood for this shit.” He growls lowly, itching to punch something. The girl apparently noticed this as she backed away from him a little. That stung, as it reminded him of the way Nel got scared when his temper flared. 

”Relax; if someone’s gonna be my punching bag, it’s more likely to be your annoying ass boyfriend.”

It took her a moment to realize whom he was referring to, but once she did, her face was a mixture of blushy embarrassment and frustration.  
”Firstly, Kurosaki-kun is n-not my boyfriend...” She sounded kind of disappointed, making the man snort. 

”Secondly, why are you so harsh on Ichigo? He never did anything to you...”  
”Fuckers like him offend me with their very existence.” The man spats out, no longer caring if he scared the girl.

”Why?” She was trying to keep her voice calm, but it was clear his anger was starting to freak her out.   
Tsch, why did she even bother coming with him by herself if she was just gonna get spooked?

”Because people like ’im think they’re better than us.”  
For a moment, they both were silent.

”Kurosaki-kun would not think that...” she comments softly after a moment, and Grimmjow glances at her, but she firmly keeps her eyes on the ground now.  
Good, he was not in the mood to deal with her any further.

After a moment of walking, they spot another pair of searchers; it was the brat and his big, Mexican friend. 

”Any sign of her?” Ichigo asks, and Orihime shakes her head.

The young man frowns, almost if he was as concerned as Grimmjow. Somehow that pissed him off further, this kid dared to be worried over a woman he did not know. Not to mention, he showcased his worry more, making Grimmjow look like an emotionless bastard.

”Do you have any idea where exactly she could’ve gone?”   
It takes the blue haired male a moment to realize Ichigo’s words were meant for him, and he turns his gaze aside, thinking for a second.

He could name a place, but it was pretty far...

Then again, Nel was fuckin’ fast.  
”I do, actually.”

 

Ichigo was surprised when the man led them to a large park few miles away, stopping next to a lake.

”This is where it happened.” He mutters cryptically, but as Orihime asks him what the man means, he just shakes his head, looking around. The group dispatches and searches around the lake, calling out for her name. 

Grimmjow glances up at the trees. The treehouse or its remnants were still there. They used to play there a lot when they were kids. Namely Nel and her buddies did; he’d been busy beating people to bloody pulp in the ring. 

He shook his head, not wanting to think about that right now, and continues to search for Nelliel.

”Are you sure she’s here?” Ichigo asks after he circles back to the man.

”The fuck I know! This is just the first place that came to my mind!” He spats at the kid who actually takes a step back upon his angry outburst. Ichigo recollects himself however, and glares at Grimmjow strictly.

”I do not know what is going on in your life, but you need to calm down; I doubt your sister wants you snapping at people that are trying to help.”

The manic, near insane cackle he lets out startles the orange haired kid. He just couldn’t help it right now; Kurosaki had no idea, no fucking idea what was going on.   
Grimmjow brushes trough his hair heavily once the laughter dies down, and he could tell the two of the kid’s friends were looking at him too now. 

He hated it.  
He hated the judgmental stares they all were aiming at him right now.  
Worse. Some of them had pity in there too, and that was about the worst thing Grimmjow could receive right now. He did not want or need anyone’s pity.

”Grimmjow...” Ichigo began, but he was quickly silenced as the blue haired man suddenly grabs his collar, glaring at him with such spiteful expression it made Ichigo’s heart sink a little.  
”You. Have no fucking clue what’s going on, so don’t you fucking DARE to parade around, acting like you’re better than others!”

”I am not.” Ichigo comments simply, grasping the hand holding him with a frown. He had no clue why Grimmjow was suddenly so worked up, like he wanted to shove Ichigo to the lake or something. 

In fact, the look in his eyes started to look slightly unstable.  
Almost if all the accumulated stress was heading closer and closer to the final tipping point with every passing second, and Ichigo began to worry a little for his and everyone else’s safety now. 

”Don’t fuck with me, kid! I know that look, seen it aimed at me my whole life; you think yer somehow better just cause you think you got the moral high-ground or some shit.”

He tugs Ichigo closer, glaring at him right in the eyes. Ichigo could smell the alcohol in his breath, wondering if the stuff man had drunk affected his sudden mood swings. Then again, he’d shown tendencies for that sober as well, so it probably wasn’t the case.

”Let me tell you something, kid. You can act and pretend you’re some saint, but by the core, all of us are selfish, rotten little fucks who only care about ourselves.”   
”Grimmjow - san, please calm down, you are acting a little...erratic.” Orihime comments cautiously, and then backs away as the sharp blue eyes turn at her now, alongside the angriest, maniacal grin she’d ever seen.

Yep, it seemed like something had definitely triggered him now, and badly. 

”Don’t even get me started on you; some weak lil princess who’s gonna get her goddamn mind broken at any day now, cause you’re too fucking NAIVE and trust the wrong people.” 

He shoves Ichigo aside, who now looks at Orihime concerned; the girl was backing away as Grimmjow paced towards her with that same, feral grin and unstable look to his eyes. Whatever Ichigo had seemingly set in motion was now gaining steam within the mind of the blue haired man, as if a dam had been broken. 

”Yeah, you like to think everybody’s got some goodness in their heart, you keep wanting to give ’em chances, until they completely break you; you LET them do that shit to you, cause you don’t want your precious big brother to worry. Oh no.”

Abruptly, as Ichigo hears those words, he realizes the man was not necessarily talking about Orihime. Both Chad and Inoue seem to come to the same conclusion, as they remain quiet, letting the man vent out his frustration.

”Then this brother has to go out and FIND you, half-dead on some lake with her skull cracked open, because she was just too damn trusting!”  
Grimmjow stops, as his clenched fists start to shake. He was still glaring at Orihime, but Ichigo had a clear indication it was not her he was talking to anymore. 

”Because of you bein’ a selfish lil fuck, the brother has to now watch as you barely make sense to the world, cryin’ over people that are FUCKING DEAD, people that could’ve been saved if she’d fucking TOLD me about what was going on!” He spat those words out with such mixture of anger and hurt, that Ichigo half expected him to hit Orihime. 

Grimmjow didn’t, though; he just stood there, shaking with frustration and emotional distress.

”And people say I’m selfish when I just want to get the fuck away for a bit, just so I don’t have to WATCH the shit show 24/7 that could’ve been prevented if you just fuckin’ told me...” 

The last words come out as an exhausted, quiet mumble, as he turns to gaze at the lake now.   
For a moment, nobody spoke. Then, a green haired head peeks from the old treehouse, and as Ichigo looks up, she could see it was Nel; she was crying.

The girl jumps down, and hesitantly walks towards her brother, whose shoulders had slumped. He looked so tired that Ichigo had a feeling he’d crumble to the ground anytime soon. That outburst had taken out every last bit of energy the man had had left in his body it seemed.

”I....I’m sorry...” Nelliel mutters, hesitantly reaching for Grimmjow’s shoulder.

”Sorry ain’t enough, Nel.”  
He says simply, turning to look at her with an exhausted look. 

The girl attempts to say something more, but that’s when Grimmjow’s legs finally give away, and he heads towards the ground, too fucking tired of everything. He doesn’t hit the hard surface however, as Ichigo moves forwards and supports him, helping the man just lie to the ground, his head resting on Ichigo’s lap now.

For a moment, none of them spoke, gazing at the scene ahead with silent shock. 

Ichigo could not recall ever seeing anybody physically break down like this over intense emotional stress, but this was clearly what had happened just now.   
Nelliel wasn’t the only one in need of help. 

”.....We should call his friend.” 

Orihime comments after a moment, and Ichigo nods in agreement; Harribel had given them all her number in case they found Nel, so Orihime dials the number and calls her, while Nel slumps to the ground beside Ichigo and the now unconscious man, hugging her knees.

”.....He must have been really exhausted.” Chad comments quietly after a moment, and Ichigo nods, his hand petting the blue hair almost subconsciously. The man was breathing evenly in his sleep, which was probably a good sign, but Ichigo was not too worried about his physical health right now. No, it was what was going on inside that head of his that was a cause for concern.

He’d just caught a glimpse of the reason behind why Grimmjow had such a nasty attitude, and from the looks of it, it was something very serious and painful.

Ichigo glances at Nelliel, wondering what exactly had happened, but he still refused to ask, not wanting to pry on their personal business.

”Grimmy was always mad at me for not telling him.” Nel comments quietly all of a sudden, and Ichigo looks up at her confused.  
”He just held it in, because his temper scared me. I know he’d never hurt me, but he’s....terrifying when he’s angry.” 

Ichigo had to agree, if for him being angry meant he’d get near manic, then it had to be freaky to see.

Orihime walks to them after a moment, sitting beside Ichigo now with a saddened look.  
”Harribel should be here within fifteen minutes. I told her about his outburst.”

”What did she say?”

”That...she’d expected it to happen. Apparently he’d been ’on the edge’ for weeks now and breakdown like this was only a matter of time in her eyes.”

They all now look at the unconscious man resting in the middle of their little circle, his face in a troubled frown even as he slept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I have like...five or four chapters worth of material to post already, so I figured why not?  
> Also, the reason why this breakdown with Grimmy happens so quickly is because Ichigo and others pretty much met him very near of this potentially happening, on the edge as Harribel says.


	3. Walking a thin line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo sort of tries to help out the reluctant Grimmjow, but when Nel has another seizure, he gets pushed away again.

They’d brought Grimmjow back home, with Ichigo personally helping to carry the man to his bed. 

After what he’d witnessed, Ichigo had begun to feel sympathy to the man admittedly. 

While he had no clue what exactly had happened, Ichigo could understand the emotional distress the man felt. Whatever had happened to Nelliel, had to be bad based on his words, and yeah, Ichigo would have been constantly on the edge too if one of his little sisters got hurt that bad. 

”Thank you again, you’ve been awfully kind to us, despite his attitude.” Harribel commends them yet again, serving the group some coffee. It was already dark outside, and they should head home soon. 

”It’s fine; Nel seems like a sweet girl so of course we’d help.” Rukia states with a smile, accepting the cup of coffee. 

”Yes...sweet, to a fault.” Harribel comments cryptically, glancing at the green haired girl who’d gone to snooze next to her brother. 

The frown on Grimmjow’s face had slackened a bit as he’d felt Nel’s presence nearby him, and his head was currently resting against hers slightly. It was clear to Ichigo now, that despite his behavior, the man deeply cared for his sister, and was just frustrated with whatever was going on with her, not knowing how to deal with it.

”....What happened?” Orihime asks the question Ichigo had been avoiding for so long. Tia sighs and brushes trough her hair, gazing at the coffee-mug.

”I suppose, given how many times your friend has helped us by now, you deserve to know at least something.” She states calmly, gesturing towards the orange haired male.   
Ichigo quickly heads to say that she did not really need to talk about it, but the woman silences him with a tired look. 

”Someone tried to drown Nel when she was nineteen; the result of that attempt was both a serious mental trauma and brain damage from a lack of oxygen.”  
The whole group turns silent, stunned by her words.

”But why?” Ichigo asks confused. Sure he knew her only for a short time, but the woman seemed nice...

”That is all I am willing to tell you without asking for permission from Grimmjow first.” The woman states simply, drinking her coffee.  
”So...that’s why she acts bizarre at times?” Ichigo questions cautiously, and the woman nods after a moment. 

”Nelliel...sometimes loses track of time, and thinks she’s still a child...”   
Her tone was mournful, and Ichigo could understand why.   
They sit there in silence now, everybody pondering what Harribel had just revealed to them.

 

When Grimmjow finally began to stir again, his head hurt like a bitch. 

He was lying on something softer, and based on the smell he was on his own bedroom again. As the events of what happened prior to him passing out came back to mind, the man lets out a groan, frustrated with himself. 

He hadn’t meant to break down and spat all that to their faces, strangers of all people. 

He’d just been so fucking tired. 

The man rolls to his side, shielding his eyes from the sunlight that peered through the closed curtains. It seemed to be either an early morning, or late in the evening, he was not sure.

Glancing at the clock, it revealed it was indeed nine in the morning. He’d actually slept over 18 hours.

Grimmjow was still even wearing the same clothes - the white sleeveless shirt and blue hoodie and black pants, the only thing they’d removed was his shoes - and he probably needed a shower.

Grumbling, the man scrambles up, a little uneasy about facing Nel right now. She’d been really upset over his outburst, and he would probably hate himself if she was acting scared again.  
Once he finally gets out of the bedroom however, he is stopped on his tracks, glaring at the scene in front of him.

Nel was sitting on the kitchen table, happily chatting with the orange haired kid of all people, who was making breakfast. Upon noticing him, Nel smiles cautiously, and waves.

”Morning, Grimmy.”

Ichigo glances up at him with a slight concerned frown, but says nothing.

”Why the fuck is he here? Where’s Tia?”

”She had to go to work today, and given what....happened yesterday, Ichigo volunteered to come by to....you know.” Nelliel’s smile fades as she brushes her hair and looks at the glass of juice in front of her still little ashamed.

Well, at least she didn’t look scared, so that was good.   
Still, he did not like the idea of the carrot kid in his house. 

”Nobody asked you to do that.” He grunts at Ichigo who turns around to look at him, but again says nothing. His silence pissed Grimmjow off further, but he was still too tired and sticky to really spat at the boy, so he just heads to the bathroom to get a cold shower.

”He could at least try to be thankful.” Ichigo mumbles, gaining an audible snort from the man.  
Once he was done with the shower, the man grabs on new pair of pants that didn’t have dust on them and walks out absent-mindedly, drying his short hair. 

As Ichigo glances up at the man, he had to admit, Grimmjow was kind of handsome.

It was now even clearer than before, that Grimmjow seemed to be at least partially a foreigner with his heritage, sort of like Chad, though not Mexican.   
European maybe?

His skin tone was too tanned for most natives around here, and even his facial features seemed a little different from the masses. 

It had to be his ruthless attitude and bad language that drove people away, because Ichigo would have expected a man like him to have plenty of girls pining for him, yet the only ladies he’d seen around the man so far were his sister and that woman Harribel, who seemed to be closer with Nel than him. 

”The hell you’re staring at?” The man snaps at him as he sits down across from his sister, glaring at Ichigo irritated. 

”You look like you have a headache.” Ichigo states simply. It was not the reason he was looking, but there was no way in hell he’d admit he was sort of admiring the man’s physique. 

Ichigo had also noticed that the wounds from that bike-accident few days prior were gone already, which was surprising. He’d never met anybody who healed that fast.

”No shit, Sherlock.” The man grumbles, and accepts the cup of coffee his sister brings him. He then grasps Nel’s hand, and for a moment they just look at each other. Slowly, the woman begins to smile, and the tense atmosphere around her dissipates. 

Ichigo turns his gaze away, smiling a bit as he focused on the eggs he was cooking. 

The teen had actually been the one to call Harribel this morning, just to ask for the siblings’ condition, and after a moment of hesitation she’d asked if he could stick by for today, as the woman was now worried for both.

”Despite what you might think of Grimmjow, he’s not entirely unreasonable. I am sure he’ll have to admit to himself he needs somebody there right now, even if he won’t say it out loud.”

Ichigo did not really give a flying fuck what the blue haired man thought, he was doing this for Nel. Despite knowing her for a short time, Ichigo really liked the girl - not that way of course - and wanted to make friends with her.

Grimmjow could sulk about it all he wanted.

Eventually, the food was done and he served both of them, though gained only one thank you.   
”These are really good, thanks Ichigo!” The woman smiles at him, and Ichigo smiles back, blatantly ignoring the daggers thrown at him by Grimmjow’s glare. 

He wasn’t sure if it was out of general dislike the man had towards him for some reason, or if he was just being protective of his sister. Maybe both. The latter he could understand and respect, the former was honestly ridiculous.

”Shouldn’t a brat like you be at school or something?” 

”I have a day off today.” Ichigo states simply, answering the man’s crudeness with equal coldness. Nel glances between them awkwardly, clearly not liking the tension between the two men, but not knowing how to deal with it. 

”And I thought you were a dropout.” The man snorts and then lit himself a cigarette.  
”Those will kill you.” Ichigo comments back, responding to bluntness with equal honesty.

Grimmjow almost wants to laugh; he’d gone through enough shit to not care for the smoke.  
”I’ve almost died so many times already kid, I don’t care.”

 

Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that, but Grimmjow refuses to explain further, just drinks his coffee.  
The green haired woman tenses briefly at those words, but then relaxes again, shaking her head as if trying to get rid of a bad thought. 

”Come on Grimmy, you should eat too, they are good.” Nel nudges the plate towards the man, who mutters something about not being hungry. 

Without a word, Ichigo snatches the plate away, only to be stopped by a strong hand grabbing his arm. The two men glare at each other for a second.  
”The hell are you doing?”

”If you don’t want it, there’s no point in leaving the plate just sit there.” Ichigo snaps right back at him, and Grimmjow tugs the plate off his hand irritated.

”I was gonna eat it, just not before I finish my goddamn coffee, brat.” 

Ichigo glares at the older man arms crossed for a moment, then huffs and turns to clean up after himself. He’d already eaten before he left home so he wasn’t hungry. 

He glances at Nel, who had begun to play with Grimmjow’s hair a little. Ichigo had a feeling if anybody else did that, the man would crush their hand until it was a lump of flesh, but he completely ignored it when his sister did it. 

There was a meow nearby Ichigo, and he turns to look at the white cat who was staring at him from the kitchen counter. The cat had come to sniff at him curiously when he’d first come in this morning, but when he’d tried to pet it, the cat sprinted away. 

For a moment the two just stare at each other, then, the cat turns its attention towards the kitchen table, namely the food still waiting in front of Grimmjow. 

Ichigo watches in amusement, as the cat lifts its butt in the air and prepares to jump at the food, only to fail grabbing it as the man pulls the plate away just as the cat lands on the table, glaring at the white fur ball annoyed.

”Fuckin’ no, Pantera! Harribel was supposed to feed you this morning.” 

Ichigo watches as the cat still tries to reach for the bacon and eggs, and Grimmjow brings the plate above his head, staring at the cat with such a peeved expression that was this mixture of annoyance and fondness a lot of cat-owners probably had towards their pet. 

Ichigo abruptly realized that he was seeing tiny bits of the domestic life of this family, as it was clear Grimmjow had momentarily forgotten that he was there. 

Nel giggles at the cat and tells her brother to give it at least a little bit, to which the blue haired man snorts and complains that she’s spoiling the furball.  
Nel starts pouting at that comment, but it soon melts into a laugh as the cat flops on it’s back, giving its owner the cute begging eyes.

Grimmjow just pushes the cat off with a grumble, and the feline jumps back to the counter, looking offended.

Once he places the plate back down, Grimmjow notices the orange haired kid was looking at him with a soft smile.

”What?”  
”Nothing. I was just surprised to find out that a man like you has a cat.”

”Yeah yeah; there’s no way a guy with this face would actually care for a pet. I must eat kittens for breakfast or something.” Grimmjow grumbles, drinking down rest of his coffee. 

”I am not judging you based on your face.”  
The blue eyes look at him sharply.  
”But you are.”

”Just like you are judging me.” Ichigo counters, and for a moment, they glare at each other again. It was clearly becoming a theme between them.

”Uhm...Grimmy, eat your food before Pantera snatches it.”

Indeed, the white cat was again hungrily eyeing the food. The blue haired man sighs and grabs a piece of the bacon, flicking it at the cat’s forehead. At first, the feline hisses unhappily but then quickly eats the piece. 

”Fucking needy little shit.” He grumbles, before starting to eat himself.  
Yeah, he had to admit, the kid cooked pretty well, but there was no way he was gonna say this out loud. 

Ichigo was currently washing the dishes from the meal. Grimmjow had slumped to the couch, and his cat had jumped on his lap, with the man petting it absent mindedly as he smoked. Ichigo had told him that smoking would just worsen his headache, but the man ignored him, giving him a middle finger. 

It was relatively mild, honestly, compared to what Ichigo expected. It seems that the blue haired man had decided to just ignore his presence for now, not wanting to get too worked up and make his sister upset again. 

The said girl was sitting on the kitchen table, swinging her legs like a child, and asking Ichigo all sorts of questions.

”Is one of those girls that came with you your girlfriend?” She asks curious, and Ichigo nearly chokes, and rubs his neck with a sheepish smile.  
”Nah. Orihime is more of a third sister, and Rukia’s too scary.”

”She seemed nice.” Nel comments, tilting her head confused.

”Yeah, but...look it’s hard to explain, an inside joke.”

”Ah okay.”

There was a momentary pause, as Ichigo dries the plate in his hand and puts it away.

”Where was your mum? I only really saw your dad and two sisters during both times we visited...”  
Ichigo stills and a somber expression appear to his face.

”My ma...she died when I was young.”

Nel gasps, and then instantly apologizes, not meaning to bring up bad memories. Ichigo just shakes his head with a sad smile.  
”It’s okay, you would not have known.”

”We never really had a mum. The orphanage we lived in was led by a man.”

Ichigo pauses and looks at her with lift eyebrow. Nelliel was gazing somewhere afar now, as if recalling a memory.

”Grimmy and I were brought there the same time...he was always a troublemaker.” She mutters softly with a fond smile. Ichigo could not stop but snort a little.

”I can imagine that.”

He could feel the imaginary daggers thrown at him from the couch, but Ichigo refuses to acknowledge the man. It was probably best if they both tried to avoid conflicting with one another for now, as it clearly made Nel uncomfortable. 

”He was often in detention or fighting with the other boys; Grimmjow rarely came to our room without bruising or bandages.” 

Ichigo remains quiet, listening to Nel’s story quietly.   
”Harribel was also in the same room, though she came in later; Tia always told him to not get in trouble so much. He never listened.”

Ichigo again, wanted to snort at that. It was obvious Grimmjow would not listen to an advice like that; the man reeked of ’kick your teeth in if you try to tell me what to do’ attitude. 

”Pesche always said...”

The second that name slipped out of her mouth, the woman stiffens, and Grimmjow jumps up so fast he was just a blur of blue, appearing in front of his sister and squeezing her shoulders as she began to shake.

”Nel, calm down.” He tells her gently, trying to make eye-contact. Ichigo just watches the scene unfold, not knowing what to do. 

”Pesche...he was...”

”Nel, do not go there, you’ll hurt yourself.” Grimmjow keeps his voice calm, but Ichigo could tell his grip was tightening, and there was intense worry in his eyes.

For a second, she remains quiet. Then, the girl lets out a near inhuman shriek and slaps her brother across the face before running into the bathroom to hide.  
Grimmjow rubs his reddish cheek, cursing under his breath.

His eyes zero in on Ichigo, and the man glares at him so furiously that the younger male half-expected he’d suddenly combust and burn into ashes under that stare. Grimmjow says nothing however, just heads to the bathroom door, knocking on it.

”Nel, please let me in.”

There was no proper answer, just some sort of sobbing coming from behind the door.   
The man keeps talking to her calmly through the door, and Ichigo had a feeling this was a common occurrence as well. 

It was now very clear how badly traumatized the woman was.

”Calm down, it’s okay; those guys cannot hurt you anymore. Harribel and I will protect you, remember?”  
At first, all they could hear was a choked cry, then, a tiny fragile voice breaks trough.  
”But Pesche...he promised that too...”

Grimmjow huffs frustrated, leaning his arm against the door and his forehead against it, taking a deep breath. It felt like he did not know what to say next.   
”I am not Pesche, Nel, you know I’m stronger. I’m not gonna leave ya.”  
He finally mutters out, his voice tired. 

There was another pause in the air. Her next words confuse Ichigo, and make the blue haired man stiffen.

”I don’t want you to be stronger; you turn into something monstrous when you do...”

Ichigo blinks at the strange comment, but Grimmjow just pushes himself off the door, biting his lip as if hold back some sort of frustrated scream. Then, his eyes hit on Ichigo.

Without a word, he stomps to the younger man and drags him out of the house, throwing him against the small tree on their backyard, before unleashing the fury he’d held in.   
”Why the FUCK did you bring that up, Kurosaki?! She was doing so well, and then you make her recall something and trigger her!”

”How would I have known! Besides she began to speak about...whatever it was herself.”

Grimmjow grabs his collar and forces him against the tree, leaving only inches between them. Ichigo held his resolve, refusing to show the way he was slightly unnerved. Grimmjow’s grip was incredibly strong, yet somehow it felt like he was actually holding back, which was unnerving on its own.

”This. Is why. I don’t want bloody strangers into our house! I fuckin’ HATE it when...” He bites his lip with his sharp canine, closing his eyes to try and calm down. 

”I understand why you’re angry, but you really cannot blame me for this.”

”I know!”   
The man spats at his face and finally let go of Ichigo’s collar, pacing around like a caged animal. 

He looked like he was heading for another mental breakdown, this time more violent one.  
Ichigo contemplates on what he should do; having both siblings break down was not a good thing to have. As Grimmjow stops, his back turned to Ichigo, the orange haired boy speaks again, choosing his words carefully.

”Take a deep breath. Nel needs you to stay calm for her right now.”

The blue eyes whip back, glaring at him, and his arm twitched dangerously, like he wanted to punch Ichigo. Grimmjow takes in a deep breath however, and rubs his eyes, trying to calm down. 

Harribel’s words play in Ichigo’s head now; ’he is not entirely unreasonable.’

Eventually, the blue haired man does manage to calm down, and walks back inside, sitting in front of the bathroom door to talk at Nel again. His voice was quiet, barely audible, and Ichigo chose not to listen in, knowing this was not his place to be. Instead, he takes out his phone and checks the message he’d received just now from Harribel.

”How are they?”

”Nelliel had a break down, and Grimmjow nearly wanted to smash my face in.”

”What happened?”

”She just began to talk about her childhood to me, and mentioned this name Pesche.”

Ichigo frowns, as he suddenly realizes he’d heard that name before, on the very first day they met.  
After a moment, Harribel’s reply arrives.

”Please, I know it’s hard but try to keep Grimmjow calm right now. If Nelliel sees him angry at her current state, things will get worse.”

 

Ichigo did not really need to even know why. Based on the scowl he’d had, somebody already distressed would surely get twice as scared if they saw that. 

Ichigo sighs, and glances towards the blue haired man, not really knowing what to do. He could heal physical injuries, but those of the mind were not his expertise.  
Plus, Grimmjow seemed to dislike him, so Ichigo was not sure how he could make the man remain calm.

After a moment, his muttering dies down, and the door finally opens, allowing Grimmjow to enter and just pick the girl up from the cold floor, bringing her to her bedroom.   
Ichigo watched after them, really not knowing what to do, not even after Grimmjow comes back out and closes the door gently, looking extremely exhausted again. 

”You’re not going to stay with her?”

It was the wrong choice of words, as Grimmjow instantly glares at him murderously. He answers the question properly however, clearly wanting to limit his anger as much as possible while inside the house.

”Nel needs space. Plus I don’t want her to see it when I’m mad.”   
Yeah, he did look pissy, and Harribel had mentioned about this too.   
The man then grabs his jacket, and gives Ichigo a glare.

”I gotta go out to blow some steam. Watch after her. If she runs away again, I swear I will rip your goddamn head off.” His voice was low and cold, a threat that felt genuine, and Ichigo could not stop but touch his neck subconsciously as the man walks past him, heading out of the door.

Ichigo just stands there quietly, watching after the man, until the white cat comes to him and rubs his head against his leg, demanding attention. Ichigo crouches and scratches the cat’s ear, wondering how this whole thing would go.

 

Grimmjow was fairly sure that the other people in the gym were kind of freaked out by the intensity which he hit the punching bag. He was just so pissed off right now, that he did not even care if the thing broke. 

Of course, that damn brat had to trigger his sister, and the worst part was, he really could not blame Kurosaki for it. 

There was no way the kid would have known she’d start talking about that stuff when he mentioned his mum. That was what Grimmjow hated the most in this situation, not having an actual, tangible enemy to deal with.

After an especially hard strike, accompanied with a fierce growl, he pauses for a second, panting heavily while he leans his palm against the wall. 

The man was covered in sweat, his skin felt uncomfortably sticky, but despite his exhaustion, Grimmjow felt like he could have gone and beaten up a bunch of people.   
Hell, he wanted to.

His mind began to drift back years in time, to the last time he’d done stuff like that for a living basically.

 

Grimmjow had been just a teen when the orphanage heads had made him enter in those illegal fighting tournaments after the stuff they’d given him was deemed ’successful.’   
He had not lost a single fight, and was soon known as an absolute beast on the ring, even gaining a numbered status above ten which was only reserved to those who were the strongest. 

One of the Espadas. 

His matches had been amongst the most popular, mainly due to how fuckin’ brutal he was.  
Grimmjow could not lie; he’d enjoyed it, the attention, and the rush of adrenaline that came from fighting. But that had not been why he’d done it.

Grimmjow had just been protecting Nel. 

The fuckers who made him fight had promised to not sell her off somewhere or otherwise abuse her as long as he did as they told him to. It was an okay deal at first, getting to vent out his frustrations in an actual matches. He did not care. He hadn’t cared that he hurt people, many of them ending up nearly dead, many of them forced to do the same thing he did.

They did not matter, only Nel did.   
But then, she’d found out. 

She’d seen him in the ring, absolutely terrified of what he became when under those dim lights, covered in his opponent’s blood. Nelliel had almost thought he’d been possessed by a demon.

 

”You can’t keep doing this!” She’d yelled at him that evening, when they’d gotten back to their room. 

”I said I’d protect you, this is how I’m doing it Nel, whenever you like it or not!”

”I did not ask you to turn into a monster!”

 

 

Those words stung, even years after she’d said them, because she’d been right. He had not gone to the ring the first time, looking for blood. He’d just gone there to survive, to protect that one thing that mattered. 

But he’d come out as something far more sinister.

The man releases a shaky breath and rubs his eyes, shaking himself off from those memories. This was not the right time to have a breakdown. He had to get his mind off of this.  
So, as Grimmjow turns his attention back at the sack he’d been punching, he begins to think of the orange haired kid, and his strikes gain an extra edge, as an angry smirk spreads across his lips.

 

Eventually, Nelliel had peeked from the bedroom, looking around the apartment. Once she saw Ichigo sitting on their couch, cat on his lap and reading a book, she cautiously walks to him.

”I’m sorry...”

Ichigo shakes his head firmly, gesturing her to sit down.

”It’s not your fault. Whatever happened to you clearly left its mark, and it’s only natural that you’d...have such strong reactions.” The young man offers gently, then grasps a blanket and covers her with it. The cat also climbs onto Nelliel’s lap, and stsrts purring as she pets its head.  
”That’s not what I meant.... I did not want Grimmy to get mad at you.”

”It’s fine. I have a feeling he was just expecting an excuse to get pissy at me.”  
The green haired woman hums, gazing at the cat in her lap sadly.

”He’s...always so cautious about letting strangers near me. I don’t think he really hates you, Ichigo, he just doesn’t like the fact he’s had to rely on an outsider so much recently...”  
The young man let’s out a thoughtful hum at that.

”I suppose...he seems like the kind of guy who’d rather die than ask for help.”

”That is very true.” Nelliel actually laughs a bit, then leans her head against Ichigo’s shoulder. It was a completely innocent gesture, she was just doing it due to her exhaustion, but Ichigo did blush a bit. 

”He just loves me very much, and hates it when he cannot help me.”  
Ichigo could understand that sentiment very well; he’d hate feeling helpless around his sister’s suffering too. 

”I just....I think he is the one who needs help.”

This surprises Ichigo, who looks down at the girl currently playing with the cat, scratching it’s belly. 

”What happened at that lake...he hides so much of his pain from us, but we can tell. Tia and I can see it. He’s so angry and frustrated with everything that we both worry he might just snap someday.” 

Ichigo remains quiet, but puts his book away to focus on her now.  
”I think...that might be why Tia asked your help.”  
”Huh?”  
Nel looks up at him with a smile.  
”You remind her of how Grimmy used to be before...before things began to go bad.”  
Ichigo blinks, baffled at that declaration. How did he have anything in common with a violent hothead, aside from being protective over their respective siblings? 

”Maybe Tia hopes you can save him.”

Ichigo sighs and rubs his eyes.

”That’s a lot of responsibility, especially given how he seems to dislike me already.”  
Nel gives him an apologetic smile, and she then turns quiet, focusing on the cat in her lap.

 

Once Harribel comes home, Nelliel had cuddled up under the blanket, watching some silly children’s cartoon half asleep. Grimmjow still had not come back, which made Harribel frown a bit.

”He’s fine I’m sure, the guy’s got a rock for a head.” Ichigo reassures the woman, who just hums and nods.

”Thank you again for watching after them today, Ichigo Kurosaki. I was really concerned about leaving them by themselves right after Grimmjow had his breakdown.”  
Ichigo nods, the pauses, contemplating on something.

”Hey...Nel mentioned something, and I was wondering if it was true.”  
Tia puts his white jacket away, and turns to look at him with a questioning hum.  
”She said...that I remind you of when her brother was young?”

It was an awkward question, but Ichigo was curious now.

The woman remains quiet, and then as she turns her gaze away a small smile dances on her lips.  
”You two have similarities. That might also be why you seem to irk him so much.”

”Why?”

”People tend to hate seeing their own weaknesses displayed to the world to see in other people. Or, at times...” She turns to look at Ichigo again with a pointed look.

”They hate to see what they lost in themselves, still present in others.”  
Ichigo had no clue on how to respond to that. 

 

The walk home was a bit chilly as the wind had picked up; it was the fall so weather was getting colder. The young man tugs his coat tighter around himself as he turns the corner. 

Harribel would have normally given him a ride probably, had Grimmjow not been out of the house. 

It was obvious to Ichigo neither of them wanted to leave Nel by herself for a longer period, and Ichigo could understand why. Plus, his home wasn’t that far anyway, and he could always do with exercise.

Then as he turns another corner to a larger street, he suddenly spots a familiar figure just sort of leaning against the wall of a nearby closed tattoo shop, smoking his cigarette while the blue eyes gazed into nothingness. Ichigo watches the man for a moment, and then after a moment of hesitation, walks to him cautiously.

Grimmjow doesn’t seem to notice his presence, or just ignores it.

”Harribel came home. She was a little worried on where you’d gone.” The orange haired male tells him, just in case the man would suddenly scream at him for ditching Nel or something.  
Slowly, the blue eyes drift to look at him, but their gaze was unreadable, making Ichigo shift his weight uneasily. 

”You should stop bothering with us.”  
Ichigo blinks at the unusually calm tone the man had.  
Grimmjow brings the cigarette back to his lips, blowing out some smoke while he gazed into thin air dully.

”You irk me, kid. And it’s not a good thing.”  
”I still don’t understand why...”  
”Doesn’t matter, does it?” The man grunts harshly now, dropping the cigarette to the ground and stepping on it, before turning to glare at Ichigo. 

”You piss me off in all the wrong ways. And yes, I fuckin’ know I’m being irrational, so I want you to fuck right off, before your face makes me do something I’ll regret.”

His tone was not threatening per say, rather it felt like a warning. Still, Ichigo was not willing to back down so easily just because somebody told him to, he wanted to know why he should. So, the shorter male crosses his arms and stares at Grimmjow defiantly.

”Nel and I get along; it’s not fair of you to push away a new friend she’s made.”  
His back hits the wall before Ichigo could even do anything and Grimmjow glares at him intently again, his every word dripping with stealth and venom.

”I ain’t kidding, Kurosaki. Nelliel already witnessed once the monster that was born inside me, and you provoke that thing. I don’t want to see that scared look in her eyes because of me, EVER again.” 

Ichigo still refused to back down. If anything, Grimmjow’s attitude and cryptic words made him push back harder.

”I will not do as you say, if you don’t give me a proper reason!”

Suddenly a hand grasps his throat as Grimmjow snarls at him wildly, his eyes sharp like that of a wild beast. He throws the shorter man aside violently, making him stumble to the ground.

”This is your last fucking warning, Kurosaki. Don’t pick a fight with me!”

The man was towering over him now, and the look he gave to Ichigo was so fierce it almost looked like his eyes were burning.

Then, without a word, he turns around and starts heading towards his home with such a quick pace it was as if the devil himself was after him.  
Ichigo just sits there for a moment, trying to process just what the hell that was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Third one. I am not entirely sure in how many pieces I'll cut the stuff I've written already. Maybe two more.  
> Writing Grimmjow is fun, especially when he's being an ass like he is.  
> Though it was even more fun writing him flirt later on ;)  
> Sorry if there's any typos or writing errors, I am editing this late in the evening. I'll probs go trough the chapters to check for any errors later on.


	4. Bloody Trance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frantic Nel comes for Ichigo in search for her brother. The orange haired teen gets to see just why exactly Grimmjow has been telling him to fuck off for his own sake.

A week had passed again, and Ichigo’s life had gone back to normal. After that one day and their search for Nelliel, Ichigo had not heard a word from the siblings, nor Harribel; she had not called to ask Ichigo to come by, nor had the young man gone to that area of the town.

It was not that he did not want to; Ichigo was still worried about Nel, but something about his final confrontation with Grimmjow had made the boy back away.   
He had not been scared of Grimmjow that was not it. Beneath the anger and the stealthy tone the man had used, Ichigo had seen a hint of fear.

Grimmjow had been afraid of what he’d do.   
He was not worried for Ichigo; that was obvious given the man’s usual attitude towards him.   
There was just something he did not want Nel to see, according to his own words.  
Ichigo began to feel frustrated about this; he had dozens of questions, and no answers to them. 

Then, one morning, when Isshin had taken the girls to shopping, there was a loud knock on his door.

As Ichigo goes to open, he finds frantic Nelliel on the door. The orange haired male wonders for a second if she was having a fit again, but looking into her eyes, the woman seemed clear-headed right now.

”I-I need your help! I can’t...we can’t find my brother!”  
”Wha...?”   
Before Ichigo could give any further answers, Nel drags him out of the door and into the street, while the young man was still only wearing socks.

”Nel, hold up! Let me...let me at least put some proper clothes on!”

The woman pauses, and then notices that Ichigo indeed was only wearing a t-shirt with boxers and socks, having just woken up. She blushes and quickly shoves him back inside, telling him to get dressed. 

Ichigo doesn’t hesitate despite his initial shock, and quickly pulls on some pants and a jacket, tugging on shoes before heading out with her, asking what happened.

”He left somewhere last night and did not come back! It’s not like Grimmy to be out this long.”  
”Have you checked the places he’d usually be?”

”Tia went to the bar, but he was not there.” Nel explains as they hurry across the streets. Ichigo did not know exactly where she was taking him, perhaps Nel wasn’t sure herself.  
”What did he set out to do?”

”I...he only said he had some business to take care of. He seemed kind of iffy about talking about it...” Suddenly, the woman stops, making Ichigo bump at her painfully, and the teen mutters out an ‘ow’ as he rubs his nose. Nelliel was staring ahead, eyes in wide shock as if she’d just realized something. 

”Oh no...It could not be could it?”

Ichigo walks in front of her, looking at the woman confused.  
”What’s wrong?”

She grasps his shoulders suddenly and shakes him, as if he was Grimmjow.  
”Tia told him to not do that kind of thing anymore! He promised!”  
”Woah, calm down Nel, explain from the beginning!” Ichigo tries to snap her out of it, but the girl just lets go of him abruptly and begins running somewhere again. After a moment of hesitation, Ichigo follows the lady still confused about her abrupt words.

He soon realized that she was leading him towards the less-safe parts of the town, which was alarming. He could imagine Grimmjow fit in here, but did not want somebody like Nelliel to get mixed up in these crowds.   
”Nel, are you absolutely sure this is the right place?”  
The woman just shakes her head, and then stops in front of a fence that was circling around an old warehouse. Before the young man could ask any questions, the woman climbs up and over it, telling him to follow.

”Wait, are we breaking in to this place?”

”It’s not as empty as it seems.” She states cryptically, heading towards the building. Ichigo has no choice but to follow suit, climbing over the fence and heading after her.

As it turned out, the place indeed wasn’t empty. The old warehouse had been turned into some sort of a fighting ring, with dozens of people watching a match that was currently unfolding. The green haired girl glanced over the crowd, trying to see the fighters. There was clear worry in her eyes, as if she was expecting to see her brother there.

”What is this place?”  
”One of the local underground fight-clubs; Grimmy used to do this kind of thing in the past.”  
Oh.  
Ichigo’s eyes widen.

He’d heard rumors and stories about underground fight rings, namely that they were absolutely brutal, and looking at the current match unfolding, he could see why people thought so.  
It also gave Grimmjow’s warning a whole new meaning, and Ichigo had to swallow down nervously now. 

”He’s not in the ring...” Nel sounded almost relieved, but it was short lived; as one of the contestants suddenly got thrown off the ring, the crowd began to cheer and chant the big guy’s name. 

”That all you’ve got? Come on! Send me a better fighter to use as a toothpick!” The large man boasted, making the crowd explode with even louder cheers. 

The fighters at the sidelines all seemed nervous, clearly not eager to challenge the hulking beast.   
Then, a figure appeared from the crowd, walking towards the ring with hands in his pockets.  
Ichigo did not even have to see the way Nel’s face went pale, he could recognize the blue haired man from just the way he walked.

”Looks like some of you do have a spine!” The big guy laughs, then he turns quiet abruptly, eyeing the challenger that had stepped in the ring. 

”I have not seen you around for a long time, Sexta.” The man grins, seemingly knowing Grimmjow from somewhere. The bluenette just stares at him dully, digging his ear absent-mindedly with his pinkie. Ichigo took this brief moment of calm to take inventory on the man. Grimmjow seemed unharmed, wearing black pants and a white tank top. There was similar wrapped cloth around his hands and arms like the big guy had. 

It seemed that either Grimmjow had not been in a fight yet, or he had not been harmed even once during it.

If the answer was former, what the hell had he been doing this whole time? Ichigo doubted the man would have just stuck by and watched the fights.

”I’ve heard rumors you stopped, getting soft are we? Still hanging out with that little sister of yours?”

Ichigo could see Nel flinch lightly and gently squeezed her shoulder to remind the woman she was not alone. Nelliel felt stiff under his touch, clearly too shocked to react in any way right now.

Grimmjow’s gaze remained stoic, which seemed to bother the large man, as he began to sound annoyed.

”What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue? It’s not like you to be this quiet, sexta!”  
Grimmjow snorts at that, and then before anybody could truly see what was happening, a sharp punch lands at the big guy’s jaw, sending him flying against the ropes. Before the man could gather his bearings, a kick connects with his stomach, making the man actually cough out blood.  
Grimmjow grabs his head, smashing it against the floor for good measure, before jumping back, spitting to the floor with a mildly irritated face. 

”You’re an eyesore, Yammy. Do everybody a favor and shut yer big dumb mouth before you give someone permanent brain damage.”

The vicious grin plastered on Grimmjow’s face was admittedly pretty damn freaky, and for a moment, the crowd turned completely silent. They clearly had not expected somebody to deck the champ of the ring this easily. 

Then, as the man pulls himself up - Yammy, what a weird name - the crowd starts cheering again, clearly expecting a good match now.

”You always were an arrogant little shit! Perhaps I need to teach you a lesson again!”  
The big man growls, and hurls himself at Grimmjow, who simply side-steps slightly, and knees him in the gut again, before elbowing him in the back, crashing the man to the ground. 

”What was yer ranking again?”

The casual, cold tone Grimmjow was using was unnerving; it felt almost if his usual angry, exhausted and grumpy self had been replaced with something near emotionless.

Well, not entirely emotionless; as Yammy clampers back up, cracking his neck with an irritated look, Ichigo could catch a glimpse of almost sadistic smirk on the blue haired man’s lips.

Abruptly, Ichigo realizes that perhaps having Nel to watch this was not a good idea. He quickly turns to the woman, only to see that she was gone. Ichigo looks around, trying to spot her in the crowd. She was not heading towards the ring, so Ichigo turns back towards the doorway; perhaps she’d run out?

Then, a loud crash from the ring gains his attention, and Ichigo turns his gaze back towards the two fighters. Yammy had managed to land a hit on Grimmjow, knocking him sideways against the ground. The man was now bleeding from his nose, and he was swaying a little as he got up, clearly disoriented by that hit.

”Those numbers are meaningless by now, especially if you are rusty!”

Yammy howls at him with a maniac grin, smacking the man hard again, and drops of blood flying in the air as Grimmjow stumbles back against the ropes, barely able to dodge another strong hit from the man by rolling aside. 

Grimmjow spits out blood, brushing trough his hair with the bloodied hand, mixing bits of red into the intense blue hue.

Ichigo wanted to go and aid the man at that moment, but he was rooted in his place, watching the match unfold with a mixture of horror and awe. Just from those few exchanged blows alone, Ichigo could tell these two men were well above usual human strength. 

 

For what felt like a good five minutes, all Grimmjow did was block those powerful punches coming from his much larger opponent, and Ichigo could tell if this continued, Grimmjow would pass out from blood loss.

Forgetting about Nelliel for a moment - something Ichigo regretted for a long time - the boy moves closer towards the ring, wanting to do something to stop the match before it would reach is potentially gruesome conclusion.

”Were you always this weak!? What was the point of those rankings back then, when it is clear I am stronger than you!” The big guy kept boasting while hitting the blue haired male, who remained quiet this whole time.

Then, suddenly, he crouches down and swipes Yammy off his feet, flipping around and landing a sharp kick to his jaw again, sending the man stumble backwards. 

Before the big guy could recover, Grimmjow was on him, elbowing the guy hard in the face, disorienting him further. 

This was followed by a roundhouse kick, which caused Yammy to fly to the side, colliding with the ropes. The large man did not have enough time to recollect himself, as the blue haired male launches a vicious attack on him the next second, striking every single weak spot in his body in rapid succession.

First, a punch to the gut, the second, a strike at his head that sent the man stumbling away from Grimmjow, followed by a kick to his spine that looked like it could’ve broken bones, and then Ichigo watches in shock as the bluenette literally growls, grasping the man’s collar and literally throwing his entire weight across the room, making him collide hard with the nearest wall. 

Grimmjow now stood in the middle of the ring, covered in blood and sweat, and he was panting harshly, glaring at the unconscious Yammy, who’d slid on the floor with blood coming out from the back of his head.

It was intense, it was brutal, and Ichigo suddenly understood what Grimmjow had meant with a monster growing inside him. It became all the more clear, when the man spit out blood from his mouth, and started fucking laughing.

It was a maniac’s cackle, reminiscent of what Ichigo had heard moments before Grimmjow’s mental breakdown earlier, but it was also different; cold, sadistic, near malicious.  
It felt almost if he was possessed by something far more sinister than his usual grumpy self.

”You might wanna think that trough again, bastard.” 

The crowd exploded in cheers a second after those words slipped out of Grimmjow’s mouth, and the entire group of people was now chanting the word ’Sexta,’ probably not truly understanding it’s meaning. The fellow fighters that had stood in the sidelines did not seem too concerned for Yammy, who was now being dragged away by people Ichigo assumed were the medical staff - if this place had one anyway. 

Suddenly, he felt eyes on him. 

As Ichigo turns his gaze back at the ring, he soon realizes the blue eyes were directed at him.  
The earlier, crazy smirk had vanished from his face, and Grimmjow looked almost...confused.

Ichigo realized too late, that Grimmjow noticing him was probably bad in this situation.

Soon, the confusion turned into a frown, followed by a widened look of realization, and then the man looks around, scanning the crowd as if he was looking for someone or something, and Ichigo knew exactly what it was.

Before Ichigo could react in any way the blue haired man jumps off the ring, walking towards him. The crowd quickly moved out of his way, probably scared that he was gonna go at them too now in his bloody frenzy.  
Ichigo knew better than that however.   
It was him Grimmjow was currently planning on murdering, or so it seemed based on his expression. 

The man grabs his shoulder, and Ichigo is dragged away while plenty of bystanders stared after him quite stunned and not knowing how to react. Even the man who’d overseen the match - silver haired guy with weird slanted eyes - seemed slightly concerned.  
Nobody tries to stop the blue haired man.

Once they were out of sight, Ichigo thrown against a wall. 

Grimmjow was still covered in blood stains, red bits all over his face and hair; the visceral color made him appear quite menacing. Had they been in any other part of Karakura, people would’ve probably intervened or called the police after seeing the sight, but this was the back alleys, and nobody was around.  
In this part of the town, people knew not to get into whatever business the fighter had with anybody, especially the kind of business that could potentially get them killed. So, Ichigo was on his own now. 

Ichigo grasps the arm holding him, feeling a little panicked right now, but he refused to show it. Given Grimmjow’s look in his eyes, showcasing your fear would be a bad idea.  
”The fuck are you here?!”   
The man nearly spats at his face, electric eyes bearing trough his skull. He was shaking lightly, as if the bloodlust and adrenaline from previous fight still had not settled properly. In fact, Ichigo could have sworn his gaze was not entirely focused, like the man was in some sort of weird trance or so, barely holding himself back.

Ichigo coughs, unable to really reply as his air supply was getting cut off.  
As if realizing that, Grimmjow loosens his hold, now grasping his collar instead. There was a nasty bruise on Ichigo’s neck now, something that would surely have his friends worrying once they saw it.

”Nel was looking for you...”  
The man curses, as if Ichigo had just confirmed his suspicion.

”Did she see that?”

”Yes...”

The man drops him, brushing trough his hair - and getting blood on it - while pacing around, muttering under his breath in what seemed to be a mixture of anger and silent panic, wrestling with whatever the hell was going on in his head, keeping his body from settling down completely.  
Then, his glare turns back at Ichigo, who was rubbing his neck now.

”Where the fuck is she then?!”  
Ichigo tensed, realizing that his answer could very well decide what the man was gonna do with him right now. Grimmjow walks to him again and grabs his collar, shaking the younger male.

”Answer me Kurosaki!”

”I...she ran off somewhere, she’s probably still in the building.” Ichigo tries to sound as calm as he could, while his heart rate was going up through the roof in reality. This was probably the closest he’d ever been of something akin to a freaked out wild animal.

”For fuck’s sake....she KNEW what she’d see if she came here....” The man grumbles, his usual exhaustion slowly returning to him. 

It was perhaps a tad worse now, given he’d just been in a fight.

”She...let’s go look for her, Nel cannot have gone too far.”  
Ichigo states cautiously, gently prying off the arm holding his collar.  
The blue eyes zero in on him again, but Ichigo keeps himself calm, hoping that it would help Grimmjow to settle down and think clearly about this. 

After a long moment of tense silence, the blue haired male finally let go of him and turns without a word, probably heading back to search for Nel from the building. After a moment, Ichigo follows him, hoping that the woman indeed was still nearby.

Ichigo could spot the weird eyed man watching them from further away, but he did not approach either of them, just looked at Ichigo curiously. His gaze was unnerving, honestly, so Ichigo avoids the man and follows Grimmjow deeper in the building.  
Nobody bothered the two during the search, probably because Grimmjow was still breathing like angered bull, and was covered in blood. 

Then, they hear some commotion in another room across from the hallway, and as the two sprints there, they find a blond male leaning against a wall, holding his bloody nose with bewildered look. It seemed that somebody had socked him in the face real good, and Ichigo could tell the guy’s nose was broken.  
”What happened?” Ichigo questions the male, who just stares at Grimmjow with a mixture of recognition and a slight horror on his face. The blue male seems to ignore him for now however, following the trail of blood that led towards a staircase. They could hear fast footsteps heading up that route.

Ichigo glances at Grimmjow, and then back at the man, who stared him as well, clearly both confused and relieved about something.

Perhaps he was dazed by the bad hit he’d gotten on his nose.  
”Do you need some help?” Ichigo questions the man, who suddenly shakes his head and shoves Ichigo away roughly, heading out of the room with swaying steps and muttering something under his breath. 

”Nnoitra-sama will not like this...”  
The man mutters as he leaves the room, and Ichigo watches after the blond confused. Eventually though, he decides to head after Grimmjow.

Following the small trail of blood up the stairs, they find Nelliel from the roof, sitting down and curled up near some boxes on the roof. Once she spots them, specifically Grimmjow and the stains on him, the woman crawls back against the wooden crates behind her, clearly terrified.

The blue haired man stops instantly as he sees that look, and his eyes turn towards Ichigo, who suddenly regretted following him there.

”Talk. To. Her.”

”Why me?”

Grimmjow’s hand comes up to probably grab his collar again, but a slight terrified whimper from Nel stops the man, and he just glares at Ichigo with a piercing stare.

”Don’t fuck with me Kurosaki, not now.”

The warning was clear in his tone, and Ichigo abruptly realized the man was still shifting restlessly, clenching his fist as if trying to hold himself back from something.  
The aura around the man was nothing sort of menacing; it felt sort of like Ichigo was standing beside a ticking time bomb, or a wild animal that could charge at him at any second if he got too close or did the wrong thing.

The teen swallows down nervously, and nods, walking towards the distraught woman, while Grimmjow walks further away from the spot, turning his back to the two as he lights a cigarette from the pack he had in his pocket. Ichigo could see his hands were shaking, but not out of fear. 

How the hell it had stayed there during the fight, the teen had no idea. 

 

After a moment of hesitation, Ichigo sits down beside the woman. The girl’s eyes were still locked on Grimmjow, and she was incredibly still.  
”Nel? Can you...hear me?”

After a moment, the girl turns her widened eyes at Ichigo, and he could see the way her expression shook, as if she was about to start crying. Her hand was covered in sticky red substance, indicating that she’d been the one to sock the guy in the face.   
Given the damage done, it was a clear indication to Ichigo that the woman was stronger than she seemed, but her mental state probably did not allow her to utilize her strength that much.

Not that it mattered either way in this situation. 

Once she finally spoke, Ichigo was not surprised to hear the more childlike voice; it was fairly clear the woman was having one of her moments again.  
”Did Grimmy kill someone?”

Ichigo pauses, contemplating it. Sure, that guy, Yammy, had been beaten pretty bad, but Ichigo was fairly sure he’d survived, as he’d spotted the man on some medical bay, hooked to IV’s and snoring loudly.

Yeah, the guy was gonna be okay.

”No, he just...uh, had a bit of a fight.”  
”There’s so much blood...he’s covered in it...”  
Ichigo reached cautiously for her trembling hand, holding it gently. Nel did not seem to notice tis, as her eyes were glazed, as if she was looking into something in her mind.  
”He’s covered in it....like Pesche was...like...”

Ichigo knew what was going to happen the second that name was mentioned; the woman grasps her head and lets out a loud, sad cry of desperation, sprinting up and running aimlessly. 

The teen jumps up, concerned that she’d just end up running off the roof, when Grimmjow moves in and grabs her before she could, slumping to sit to the ground with her. His arms were locked tightly around the struggling woman, not to trap her but to prevent her from running off and hurting herself. 

After a few more seconds, Nel stops trying to resist and just weeps against his shoulder, seemingly not remembering the bloodstains on him that had bothered her so before.  
Grimmjow remains silent, just sits there, letting her cry while still holding the smoking cig in his hand. As Ichigo looked up at his face, he saw that same void of energy again, like the moment before he’d passed out earlier in the lake. 

After a moment however, Grimmjow looks up at him, and the same murderous intent was back.

“Leave.”

The man did not have to say anything else; Ichigo could see the warning in his eyes.

Grimmjow was too angry, too high in adrenaline after the fight that he could snap at any moment and probably attack Ichigo.

The teen knew how to fight, but after what he witnessed, he wasn’t too sure if he could handle this.   
Mainly however, he did not want Nelliel to see it in her already volatile state, and neither did Grimmjow. He had to calm the fuck down somehow, and then maybe they could continue being snippy at each other again. 

Ichigo just nods faintly again, and walks past them towards the door.

“Bring her home before anything worse happens.”  
Grimmjow says nothing; he completely ignores that obvious statement.  
He just clutches the girl in his lap, biting his tongue as to not rush after the orange haired little shit and beat him to a pulp as well. Nelliel did not need to see that too.   
Hell, Kurosaki didn’t probably deserve it, but he was still half in Trance. 

 

Eventually, he manages to settle down enough to help now exhausted Nelliel down from the roof, and call Harribel to pick them up. The green haired woman kept glancing at him even as he wiped the blood off from himself. Her grey eyes were wide, and she was obviously terrified. 

Grimmjow did not bother talking to her, knowing that he’d just make it worse.   
Once Harribel arrived, she said nothing either, just took Nelliel into the car.The woman does give him a long meaningful look, but Grimmjow just glares back at her almost challengingly. 

“Come home once the Trance wears off. You are too agitated.”

The woman tells her sternly, and Grimmjow lets out an agreeing hum, hands in his pockets. He seemed calm on the outside, but they both knew that a Trance for one of their kind was no joking matter. 

Hell, Grimmjow was surprised he’d been able to deal with this whole situation without trying to rip the kid’s head off. 

He watched the two women drive away, and soon enough, he could feel familiar slanted eyes on him.

“My, that was…surprising, Grimmjow-kun. Did you perhaps know the young man who left earlier?”  
The blue haired man says nothing, just turns to look at Gin with a bored expression that barely contained the raging current in his head he was trying to resist. His arm twitched restlessly in his pocket, and his vision was slightly reddish on the edges.

“Ah, I see; too early for a chat is it? My my, those trances are difficult to deal with.”  
Gin comments, his tone perfectly casual despite the relatively dark matter he was referring to.  
Then again, that’s how the silver haired weirdo had always been, for as long as Grimmjow could remember.   
He just walks past the man, heading back inside the fight club. 

“Do you perhaps need help in diffusing that?” The man calls after him.  
Grimmjow stops, and turns to look at the man over his shoulder, his eyes gaining back some of the predatory glint, to the point even Gin backed away slightly.

“Keep yer drugs away from me.”   
“As you wish; please try to go easy on your next opponent, he’s far less strong compared to Yammy.”

Grimmjow just flashes him a manic grin, as the bloodlust starts taking him over again. 

“Oh my, oh my, this could be a bit problematic.”   
Gin mutters out watching after the man, though you would not have guessed his concern from the man’s perfectly calm, faintly smiling face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to re-write the end bits of this chapter as I felt the story pace was becoming a bit too fast.   
> So, it might take a little while before I post the next chapter, as I have to figure out a missing chunk of a story between the end of this chapter, and the original ending I had in mind I will still use   
> Fight scenes are hard to write. Meh  
> You'll learn more about this "Trance" thing in future chapters, I promise.


	5. Leap of faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sudden dire situation befalls the Kurosaki family, and Ichigo ends up taking a risk and trusting a man whom was just revealed for him to be a potential killer. He feels he has no choice, for Ichigo Kurosaki cannot just leave his sister when she needs him.

That morning, Ichigo was quiet at school again.

He could not stop thinking about what happened yesterday; frantic Nelliel on his door, the fight he’d seen, the strange, twitchy behavior from Grimmjow that felt anything but normal, even from somebody who was naturally aggressive like him.

Sure, nothing had happened.

But Ichigo was no fool, his sixth sense had warned him that something could happen if he did or said the wrong thing. 

That being said, the only reason he’d allowed himself to leave that roof and Nelliel alone with the man was his relatively good instinct that he would not hurt her. Still, the teen wanted to go and check on the woman just in case, but he was fairly sure if Grimmjow saw him there, he would not let him in.

Not to mention, if the man was still in that strange twitchy state that reeked of bloodlust…

“Ichigo!”

The teen snaps out of it, finding Rukia stand in front of him with a concerned frown. He must’ve spaced out for a long time, having not noticed the short woman approach him. 

“Ah…hey Rukia.”

“I called for you four times at least! What is going on with you?”

Ichigo rubs his head sheepishly, but before he can answer, Rukia grabs his collar and drags the young man towards the nearest empty classroom, closing the door behind her. Once the woman turns, she glares at Ichigo with her arms crossed. Rukia was clearly worried about him, and had now reached the point where she wanted to talk to him honestly. 

“You’ve been awfully focused on those two siblings lately.”  
Ichigo couldn’t deny it.

“I understand your wish to help, but I honestly think this could be dangerous. There’s something off about that man.” Rukia tells him honestly, expression in a deep frown. Ever since Rukia had seen Grimmjow, something told her she’d seen him before somewhere, and not necessarily in a positive context. 

The young woman just couldn’t put a finger on where he’d seen the man exactly. 

“I know….I saw something yesterday that hints towards it.”  
This gains the woman’s attention, and she looks at Ichigo with lift eyebrow.  
The teen sighs and brushes through his hair, licking his lips nervously.

“I…Nel came to me yesterday, said she couldn’t find her brother. We went to look and…”

Ichigo pauses, brushing through his hair again. He was not certain how to describe it all to Rukia.   
“He was in a fight…some sort of…illegal arena I guess. I’ve never seen anybody fight so brutally.”  
Rukia’s frown deepened even further as Ichigo described the following events.   
None of what Ichigo stated sounded good.

“You should have gone to the police about that place, its likely illegal.”

“I am aware of that; I just…I did not want to provoke him at that moment.” Ichigo explains, rubbing his head uncertain. If he was honest, the thought of informing the police didn’t even cross his mind; he’d been too preoccupied with worrying over Nel, and confusion about just what the hell was going on with Grimmjow.   
A hand lands on his shoulder, and Rukia looks at him sternly now.

“I understand your worry, but I think you should not get involved with them any further; just inform the law enforcement about that place.”

“Why don’t you do it? Your brother works with the police.”  
Rukia makes a face and looks aside with a slightly bitter look.   
“I doubt he’d take me seriously.”

Ichigo did not blame her for her doubt; Byakua was often rather cold and dismissive towards his little sister, though people often said he was bad at showing emotion in general. Either case sounded plausible to Ichigo.  
“Promise me that you’ll go.” Rukia tells him sternly, right before the bell rings, indicating their first lessons for the day were about to start. Ichigo just nods, promising he’d take care of it the first thing once he got out of school. 

 

 

A girl was running across the streets, trying to get away from her pursuers. 

She quickly sinks into the shadows of a nearby alleyway, hiding behind a dumpster while digging out her phone. 

The girl brushes through her black hair, heart racing a mile a minute. She had to call somebody for help before she’d be seriously screwed.

The girl glances towards the streets, but doesn’t see her pursuers; it seemed that she’d managed to shake them off. Finally, the phone connects, and the girl could hear her sister’s voice at the other end.

“Yuzu! Where’s dad, I need help!”

The girl on the other end sounds confused, but Karin doesn’t give her much time, just tells her to get their damn old man. After a second, she could hear their dad on the phone.

“Karin, what is going on?” Isshin questions, but he’s cut off short as the girl blurts out her dire situation.

“I’m being chased by some unknown guys; I saw them kill someone and now they’re trying to get me too!”  
“Woah, slow down sweetheart, what do you mean you saw somebody get killed?”

“I was just taking a shortcut trough that old warehouse site, when I heard some commotion; these two dudes in white suddenly came in and shot the third guy!” Karin explains quickly, glancing up again to see if the two were anywhere nearby yet.

“Where are you right now?”

“I’m at an alleyway near that old shopping district that’s getting renovated next month!”

Suddenly, she heard someone yell after her, and Karin realizes for her horror that one of the men had spotted her. The girl quickly sprints up and runs away, trying to shake the two off. 

“Get back here, brat!” 

One of the men shouts after her, and Karin runs faster; there was no way in hell she’d let them get her.   
Then, as the girl turns a corner, she slips, and her hat flies off her head, landing on the other side of the street. Before she could get up, the two descend on her, and she’s violently yanked off the ground by the big guy.

“What should we do with this one?” He questions from the other man, holding firmly onto the struggling girl. There was nobody around at the moment, and the girl began to feel panic raise in her mind.  
The other guy gives her a toothy grin – his teeth looked weird, kind of jagged, like that of a shark – and then frowns, examining her more closely.

“Wait…this one’s a Kurosaki kid.”

Karin freezes, confused; what would guys like these want from her family?”

“Oh, well we got ourselves a lucky break then, Di Roy; weren’t we supposed to go an’ fetch one of them later on?” The big guy looks down at the girl, who just stares at the shark-teeth guy with wide eyes.

What the hell was going on?

“Yeah, let’s take her with us; Aizen-sama will be quite happy once he hears about this!”  
Karin starts to struggle again as she gets dragged towards the car the two had.

Then, her eyes caught a glimpse of something moments before the car door closed in on her face.  
There was a man standing on the street further away, watching the scene unfold. 

She recognizes the man immediately from the vivid blue hair; it was that asshole of a brother of Miss. Nel.

Karin banged on the car window, not really even knowing why; it wasn’t like he could do much – and it did not seem like he would, based on how he just watched them, hands in his pockets, staying in the shadowy corner as if avoiding to being seen.

 

Grimmjow watches the two drives off with the kid, before walking to the street and grasping the red hat that fell off the girl.

The gazes at the direction they’d gone and then sighs rubbing his eyes, still holding the lone hat.  
He knew all too well, that he was about to have to pay his dues now.  
Grimmjow hated it.

 

 

Ichigo never gets to make good of his promise to Rukia; once he arrives at the police-station, his focus is completely taken elsewhere, away from his original intentions.  
His father was there alongside Yuzu, who was crying like crazy.  
Ichigo quickly hurries for them, asking what happened. 

Isshin turns to look at him with a serious frown, although Ichigo could also tell the man was extremely concerned. 

“What’s going on, where’s Karin?”  
The second Ichigo mentions that name, Yuzu bursts into tears again and hugs her brother tight, blubbering out nonsense Ichigo could not really understand.   
“Karin has been kidnapped.” 

Ichigo turns to look at the blond shopkeeper stunned. The hat wearing man had a serious look on his face, which contrasted to his usual goofy persona. 

Normally people would question what a simple shop-owner would be doing there in the station, but Ichigo had learned long time ago that Urahara seemed to have connections in the force one way or another; he was often consulted in a lot of cases from what he’d seen.   
If he asked the man however if he was undercover agent, Urahara would always deny it. Ichigo had his suspicions, but he’d also gotten so used to the man’s strangeness, that he no longer questioned anything he did or knew.

“Wha…how, when?”

The teen demands, feeling cold grip his heart; he could easily see why Yuzu was so distraught.   
Urahara and Isshin glance at each other, having a silent conversation, as if trying to decide whenever Ichigo should hear about the reasons behind Karin’s situation.

“Dad….”

The old man sighs and rubs his eyes, looking at Ichigo seriously.

“Karin called Yuzu about thirty minutes ago; she said she’d seen some men killing a guy and they were after her. The call got cut off abruptly. Once we went to the area, she was nowhere to be seen, but there was a corpse in a nearby warehouse.”  
Ichigo’s eyes widen; this sounded bad.   
“We came here immediately after, a-and…” Yuzu sniffs, wiping her eyes hard. She was incredibly worried.   
“Do you have any leads yet? Is she alive?” Ichigo questions, as fear gripping his heart.   
This just couldn’t be happening right now!

Urahara and Isshin share another meaningful look between one another. Their silent conversations really started to bug Ichigo; his sister was in trouble, and they refused to explain him what they knew!

“…Why don’t you go and get yourself something to drink Yuzu-chan? We need to talk with your brother.”  
The girl was well aware that the men just did not want her to hear whatever they were going to talk about next, but nodded and did as Urahara requested anyway, heading for the coffee-slash-hot-chocolate machine.

Ichigo watches after her, and then turns back to the two adults.   
“It seems…she may have seen a transaction related to mafia-business.” Urahara begins, and his words make Ichigo’s blood run cold; he was aware there were organized crime syndicates in their city, but he’d never thought one of his sisters would end up getting in contact with them.   
“Unfortunately, as we learned, the people involved spotted her.”

“…You don’t think she’s….”

Urahara hums, glancing at Yuzu who was still lingering near the drink machine.  
“We do have a reason to believe she may be alive.”  
Ichigo lifts eyebrow, but the man refuses to explain anything further.

“What gang did they even belong to?”  
“Based on the white clothing, they likely were Aizen’s men.” Isshin states simply. 

That was beyond bad; Ichigo had heard of Aizen, the fearless, cunning leader of the Espada that broke apart years back. He’d never been caught, and nobody knew exactly what happened to his top executives. 

“There is also lingering fear, that this might be connected to your…latest acquaintances.”  
Ichigo looks up at Urahara confused.  
“Ichigo…” Isshin begins, rubbing his head unsure on how to proceed.  
“Wait. Do you mean Nelliel and Grimmjow?”  
Urahara just nods faintly, and then gives Isshin another meaningful look. After a moment, the man sighs and nods. “Show him. I think it’s for the best if he knows about it too given how much he’s spent time with them.”

After that, the blond man gestures Ichigo to follow him. The two head into a small office room and Urahara brings out a folder for Ichigo to see.  
“Normally this would not be shown to someone like you, but given your apparent close connection with the aforementioned two, I believe you deserve to know – and I just got your father’s permission too.”

Without a word, Urahara opens the folder and displays it for the teen. Having his dad know of such files did not surprise Ichigo, as his dad had in fact been a member of the force before retiring and becoming a doctor for their family clinic. What did surprise him however, was what was in the files displayed to him.

Ichigo recognized the vibrant blue hair and eyes immediately. The picture was probably taken some years ago, given how Grimmjow looked slightly younger. His eyes did not hold the weight they did nowadays, and most of all, the image showed him smiling, something he rarely did.

Well, it wasn’t a smile; more like a mad grin that split his face in half. The picture was seemingly taken at some sort of fight-hall, and the man was either spectating an ongoing match, or preparing for his.   
Then, there were more photos, taken from the said match; Grimmjow was fighting against a long haired blond man, although just from the pictures alone, it was easy to tell it was more like one-sided beating; the guy stood no chance against Grimmjow. 

The photographs were not as shocking to Ichigo as the blond man would have assumed; the teen had seen this brutality first hand already.  
However, once he began to actually read the files, the teen felt his stomach twist lightly.

 

Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez  
Male  
approx. 19 years old at the time of the photographing   
Origin unknown  
Rank: Sixth Espada  
Possible test-subject for Aizen’s enhancement drug  
Speed, stamina, strength, healing all well beyond normal human limits.  
Tendency for the “Trance” state indicated in the research notes recovered, causes excessive bloodlust and aggression, proceed with caution.  
Possible connection; A sister figure? goes by Nelliel.   
Friend? Tia Harribel (refer to the third Espada folder)

It wasn’t the basic information that stunned Ichigo really. It was the description after these bits.   
It was a list of crimes committed.

Suspected of:

\- Several cases of violent assault (refer to the fight-arena folder)  
\- break-ins  
\- kidnapping  
\- smuggling  
\- possible murder under the drug’s heavy influence (Refer to the Folder A6; Luppi Antenor)

Current status: under surveillance, refer to the plea-deal folder regarding to Ms. Nelliel

 

 

There was more, but Ichigo had stopped reading already; he was entirely still, staring at the files in front of him in shock. Rukia’s warning now seemed more necessary than ever before. Urahara watched the teen carefully, waiting for his reaction. 

“If…if this is all true…why isn’t he in jail already?”  
“His sister made a deal with us.”   
Urahara did not explain it further once Ichigo looked at him with a questioning look. It did not really surprise Ichigo, as there was obviously only so much he was allowed to see. Not that it mattered; he already knew enough to feel a little uneasy.

He had been dealing with a potential murderer?

It…it couldn’t be. 

“How is…”  
“I sense a bit of doubt in you, young Kurosaki-san; I can guarantee the things in those files are all true.  
“But you just said that there was “never enough evidence.” Ichigo points out, but the man just gives him a mysterious smile. It vanishes quickly however, as the man now gives him a serious look.

“For your own sake, Kurosaki san, I recommend you cease contact with those two.”  
“Why? Are they involved in what happened with Karin?”

“Not likely, but there might be a connection, as stated. Isshin mentioned that he’d sensed somebody had been following his family around. I believe it may have been caused because of your interaction with the two.”  
Ichigo frowns, not liking the implications of Urahara’s words. It almost sounded like the man was blaming him for Karin being kidnapped.

“I am not blaming you. I just feel that perhaps there could be a connection. Your father was involved in this case in the past after all…”  
Ichigo blinks, surprised to find out about this.   
Then again, their dad did not talk much about his time in the Force, not after their mum Masaki had died which had caused Isshin to leave the law enforcement.  
“What are they gonna do with my sister?”

“It is… too early to say, but I suspect they will not kill her off the bat; most likely she’ll be used as leverage.”  
“Leverage for what?”  
Urahara just shakes his head, closing the files.  
Ichigo felt frustration take a hold of him; it was clear the man was again not going to tell him everything he knew. While the teen understood why, he still wished Urahara would have given him more info.  
“I can assure you, we will inform you about any further development in the case, but for now, it’s for the best if you go and bring your other sister home with you. Your father has to stay here for a bit given his knowledge on the past case.”

It was such a sudden dismissal, and Ichigo watches in disbelief as the man collects the files and puts them away again.   
Honestly, he could not understand why Urahara would show him all this – how he knew of it and had access to the files in the first place was a whole other matter, but not important right now – if he was just going to brush Ichigo off after all. 

If the purpose had been to ease his mind, then it clearly wasn’t working.

“Consider this as a request to stay away from Jeagerjaquez and Ms. Nelliel for now.” Urahara states seriously as he turns to look at Ichigo again. It felt a little pointless, it was not like Ichigo was gonna go and instantly see the two after what he’d just learned about Grimmjow.  
Though, he honestly understood why Urahara gave him the warning; Ichigo had a bad habit of dragging himself in the middle of these situations, and given he’d sort of made friends with Nel, it was not that unlikely that he’d want to go see her regardless of the potential danger. 

Ichigo just nods at the man, and then walks back to Yuzu, giving the sobbing girl a hug and promising her that the police would find Karin and save her soon.   
Isshin brings the two siblings home before reluctantly heading back to the station as he was apparently needed; the man was clearly terrified that his other kids would be taken as well.

It takes a while, and Ichigo has to stay beside Yuzu for a long while, but eventually the girl manages to fall asleep, clutching her favorite lion teddy-bear she named Kon.

The teen tugs a blanket over his sister and paces around in the kitchen for a while, unable to really sleep. He was incredibly worried, but also could not stop thinking about Nelliel, and especially, Grimmjow, now.  
Was all that in the files really true? Grimmjow was violent and temperamental yes, and did seem to have some weird inhumane strength, but he just… Ichigo did not want to think of him as a murderer.  
For all his faults, Ichigo just couldn’t see him as that cold blooded.  
Then again, he barely knew the man.

The teen walks back to Yuzu’s room, checking on the girl; she was still asleep, though the worried frown had not let her face. The teen sighs and then walks upstairs to his room, checking his phone.

It had only been an hour or so since their dad dropped the two siblings off, but Ichigo had hoped there would’ve been some messages already. He slumps to his chair, gazing out of the window into the evening sky; it was already eight thirty in the evening, so the sky was dark. 

Ichigo wished helplessly that he could do something, anything, but the teen didn’t even know from where to start. He contemplates on calling his friends, but in the end decides against it, not wanting to worry them as well. If there was no development by tomorrow, then he’d have to speak to them anyway. 

Suddenly, something hits his window, and Ichigo is startled awake from his thoughts. Cautiously, he gets up and looks out from the window.

There was a figure standing at the yard, hood covering his head.   
It did little to hide the vivid blue locks underneath, and Ichigo felt his heart rate skyrocket as he recognized the figure.

It was Grimmjow, and he was looking up at Ichigo, tossing something in his hand.   
The teen frowns and takes a closer look at what the man was holding.  
Then, he recognized it; it was Yuzu’s red cap. 

His eyes shoot instantly at the man’s face, and Grimmjow smirks faintly, saying something. Ichigo could not hear him, but he could read the words from the man’s lips.

“Lost something?”

Without thinking, Ichigo sprints downstairs, and rushes to the front door. As he grasps the handle however, the teen pauses, realizing that this could be dangerous. If what those files showcased were true…he was going to be face-to-face with a seemingly confirmed murderer. 

Furthermore, if he was still connected to Aizen, this could be a trap.  
Ichigo glances towards Yuzu’s room, and releases a shaky breath. If it had to be one of them, better be him than Yuzu.

Hesitantly, Ichigo pushes the door open and walks towards Grimmjow cautiously, looking for any signs of danger. The man just stood there with his usual unimpressed look, although he did lift eyebrow at Ichigo’s sudden cautiousness. 

“Where did you get that?” Ichigo questions, leaving good ten feet between them. 

Grimmjow stops throwing the cap up and down and instead flips it at Ichigo’s direction, forcing the teen to catch the headwear before it hit him in the face. 

“From the street. It fell off the kid before she was caught.”

Ichigo’s eyes widen.  
“You saw what happened?”

Grimmjow stuffs his hands in his pockets and makes a noncommittal sound at first, though eventually he inclines his head slightly in a nodding gesture. 

“Did….”

“No. I’m not good with cops so I left before they arrived to the spot.”

Grimmjow rubs his neck, looking like he really didn’t want to be there right now.   
Ichigo swallows down hardly, and dares a step forward. So far he had not sensed anything beside the man’s usual gruffness and reluctance to talk to him. 

“You should have gone to them.”

The blue eyes snap at him, and Ichigo freezes to his spot, clutching Karin’s hat in his hands.   
Grimmjow examines him from head to toe quietly for what felt like ages, before sighing and brushing through his hair.

“Don’t wanna. But I hate feeling indebted to somebody.”

The teen looks at him confused, and the man grunts, scratching his neck with an extremely irritated face, like he hated having to explain this.

“You’ve helped Nel out quite a bit, so I owe you.”

It sounded like a reluctant admittance, and part of Ichigo felt a little happy that he apparently had made some sort of difference with his brief interactions with the woman. He hadn’t really done much thought, so Ichigo wondered if Grimmjow had some other reason for doing this.

What this was exactly, Ichigo did not know yet.

“Then you should go and inform the police of what you know, and not come and talk to me.”  
“Hell naw. I told you I ain’t good with cops.” Grimmjow snorts at him, dropping his hand to his waist, slipping a finger to his belt loop. 

“Besides. By the time they’ll get their gears moving, yer lil sister will be toast.”

“How would you know?” Ichigo dares to ask, although he knew the answer already.  
Grimmjow just stares at him dully for a moment, before snorting again and rolling his eyes.  
“They were kidnapped by Aizen’s lackeys. I should fucking know how they operate.”  
“So you were…”

The blue eyes zero in on him again, and Ichigo takes a step back, his heartbeat rising again.   
For a moment, they both stood there silent, to the point ichigo began to feel cold in the chilly outside air.

“I told ya not to pick a fight with me, didn’t I Kurosaki?” Grimmjow finally mutters quietly, flashing him a manic grin reminiscent of the one he’d seen in the ring and in the photos. However, there was a lack of true maliciousness to it. 

The man then rubs his head again and looks at Ichigo seriously.

“It’s honestly more efficient if we go an’ get her right now. Yer cop friends will take forever to do shit, and since I know where she is…”

“….That will be dangerous, and why should I come with you? Why would I… trust you?” Ichigo frowns, forcing the next words out despite his tenseness.  
“If you used to be one of them, how do I know this ain’t a trap?”

The man looks at him for a moment with yet again another one of those bored looks, before he starts pacing closer to Ichigo, who stubbornly remains still, despite his instincts telling him he should run like hell.  
Grimmjow stops just few feet away from the teen, glaring down at him with his best stoic face, which still managed to look intimidating. 

“You don’t. I ain’t got time to try an’ win yer trust. I’m offering to help you out ONLY this once, Kurosaki. Either you come with me now, or wait till the cops find her dead corpse.”  
Grimmjow glares down at him, clearly wanting an answer right now. 

Ichigo glances back inside, and contemplates it. 

If what Grimmjow said was true, waiting for the police could prove fatal, and since the guy knew where she was being held…

That was the thing really; Ichigo’s gut told him Grimmjow was telling the truth, but all the evidence he had went against it. It made more sense for this to be a trap. Plus, Urahara had just told him to stay away.  
But, Karin was in trouble, and needed him right now.   
Nobody could convince Ichigo otherwise.

As Ichigo glances up at Grimmjow again, who still stood there, hands in his pockets and with a stoic face, he made his decision.

“I need to grab my phone. Maybe you do not want to talk to the police, but if things look really bad, I WILL call them.” He says almost challengingly, expecting the man to protest. For his surprise Grimmjow just shrugs and digs his ear.  
“Then go fetch it, we ain’t got much time.”

As Ichigo heads back outside with his phone, he glances at Yuzu, feeling guilty at leaving her by herself like this. He felt he had no choice however; Ichigo’s gut instinct was rarely wrong, and with Karin’s life at risk, his protective nature often over rid his self-preservation instincts.

Grimmjow was already at the street once Ichigo reaches him, and looks up at the man questioningly.  
“I hope you got more of a plan than just us marching in there.”  
Grimmjow flashes him a smirk.  
“I’m good at winging it.”

Ichigo almost wanted to groan, but he follows the man nevertheless. The streets were empty around this time with barely any people around. They soon reach a nearby parking lot, with Grimmjow heading for a white bike which was probably his.  
“Say…if you did not want to involve the law enforcement, but felt you had to repay me, why didn’t you just go and get Yuzu yourself?”

The man throws him the helmet, and Ichigo couldn’t stop looking at the bike dubiously; he’d never ridden one before. Upon seeing his nervousness, Grimmjow flashes him an amused smirk.  
“You might wanna hang on if you don’t wanna fall off.”

Ichigo grumbles at that, and puts the helmet on to hide his frustrated blush. As he reluctantly sits behind the man, he could hear Grimmjow answer his question quietly.   
“Probably because if this was the other way around, I’d want to do something myself and not just sit around and let some other bastard try an’ save Nel.” 

Ichigo doesn’t say anything to that; he could see where this came from. Grimmjow had all the reasons not to trust anybody else with Nelliel, not after how others let him down with her care.   
The teen brings his arms around the man hesitantly as they start driving, and it became fairly clear Grimmjow was a reckless driver; when he’d told Ichigo to hold on, he’d meant it.

So, the teen clutches on to the man, squeezing his eyes shut and hoping he’d get to Karin on time before dying himself in a car accident or something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a bit of a bigger action part begins, though it's not really the final battle or anything. There's too many questions that still need answering.  
> mainly this bit will serve as the thing that helps Grimmjow to truly mellow out to Ichigo.


	6. Grimmjow is a dick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title says.  
> I seriously couldn't come up with another title for this chapter. It literally shows how Grimmjow can be such an asshole even when he's technically doing something nice.  
> They go rescue Karin  
> Grimmjow ends up being a dick as expected.

Grimmjow had brought them outside the city, and the two were currently looking at a mansion hidden from view behind the trees. 

The building looked old and broken down, as if it had not been used in ages, which was likely.

“What is this place?” Ichigo asks as Grimmjow walks beside him.   
His head was still covered with his hood, shadowing the man’s face lightly; he’d also tucked his jacket collar further up. Ichigo could not stop but wonder why the man did it, it almost felt like he was trying to hide his face somewhat. 

“One of Aizen’s old places. He doesn’t really use this one anymore, but I heard some of his goons might still drop by.”

“How do you know she’s here?”

Grimmjow turns to look at him, and Ichigo tries his best not to show his slight unease.   
“I knew the two who snatched her. I’ve seen ‘em bring people in here before.”  
Ichigo kind of wanted to ask why Grimmjow would hang around this place if he really wasn’t involved with anything happening there, but he kept his mouth shut. 

They began to sneak towards the mansion, with Ichigo following on the man’s footsteps. He suddenly realizes that he should have probably taken some sort of weapon with him instead of just his phone.   
“Where do you know them exactly?” he asks as they manage to slip at the backside of the mansion, with Grimmjow scanning the building for any sign of life, and a good way in. 

“Old fans. They probably hate my guts for dropping ‘em and leaving.” Grimmjow comments casually, which makes Ichigo lift eyebrow at him. That…explained his behavior a bit, perhaps, why he was hiding his face.  
After being sure that the coast was clear, Grimmjow sneaks to the building wall, heading towards the small back-door that led to the kitchen of the place.

Ichigo follows him, looking around a bit nervous. 

It was bold, just to enter in like that, but then again, if Grimmjow knew the two, he probably knew how they operated, and could therefore sneak in without either of the men noticing.

That is, if they were the only ones around. So far neither of them spotted any movement around or within the mansion, but it didn't necessarily mean the two were alone. Although, as Ichigo glances at the overgrown front yard, he notes there was only one black car there, indicating that perhaps indeed the only ones around were the two who took Karin in the first place.

“Seriously, what are we gonna do? Those two must have weapons.”  
The blue haired man snorts, making Ichigo freak and worry they’d be heard.

“Didn’t take you for a coward.” he glances at Ichigo with an amused smirk, and the teen glares at him.  
“I am not a bloodthirsty maniac like you; I can defend myself, but I am not bullet-proof, and neither are you.”

Grimmjow rolls his eyes, but says nothing as they slip further in the mansion.   
“Knowing them, Di Roy’s probably around the mansion somewhere, whereas Edrad likely sticks by yer sis: the shithead never liked underground places.”  
“So…you think they’re alone?”

Grimmjow hums, and then suddenly shoves Ichigo back behind a wall, looking at something.  
It was one of the men, Di Roy as Grimmjow had expected. He was currently on the phone with somebody, and based on his bitching he did not like the person much.

“Alright listen up, bitch! Aizen-sama specifically wanted us ta get one of the kiddos, and now we got one, so don’t you dare put me on a waiting line!”

Grimmjow couldn’t stop rolling his eyes at that; it was just like Aizen to make his lackeys wait.

He could feel Ichigo press closer to his back, peeking from behind him at the man.  
They wait until the man passes, and then the teen whispers out his question quietly.  
“Should we do something about him?”

“Given these two morons are likely alone, dealing with them ain’t too hard; they’re weak as fuck even compared to Yammy, and he was our lowest rank.”

Ichigo looks at the man, the question at the tip of his tongue, but decides not to voice it out.   
He probably knew the answer to it already. 

“They still got guns.” Ichigo points out, and Grimmjow looks down at him now mildly annoyed.   
It was honestly scarier now that Ichigo knew more about him. 

“Like I’d let ‘em shoot you. That’d be a dick move even from me.” The man huffs, and then turns his attention back towards the direction Di Roy had gone. Ichigo blinks, surprised about the man’s choice of words; surely his “enhancements” or whatever they were did not make him bullet proof?

Grimmjow moves stealthily towards the direction the man had gone, and he gestures Ichigo to stay put, which was probably a good idea; Grimmjow was obviously more used to stuff like this, so it was better for him to deal with it. 

He watches as the man slips into the next room, and a moment later, he could hear the noise of a struggle and somebody hitting the ground. A moment later, Grimmjow pushes the door open and gestures him to come in with a bloodied hand. Ichigo sneaks there, and feels his stomach twist a little as he sees the amount of blood around the guy’s head. 

There was… a crack on the floor, from the spot his head had been hit against the floor.

“You gonna stare at him the whole day?” The blue haired man asks, wiping the blood to his pants and picking up the gun.   
“W-what if he wakes up?” 

It did not seem likely, but Ichigo had to ask, though forcing his voice out wasn’t easy.   
Grimmjow stops on his tracks, glances at the man, and then casually shrugs.  
“I’ll hit ‘im again then.” 

Ichigo looks up at the man in slight disbelief. Perhaps he could be that cold-blooded after all.  
As they head deeper into the mansion, Ichigo kept glancing at the man, until Grimmjow finally snaps and turns to glare at him.

“What?”  
“….You said he was your fan.”

Ichigo tried his hardest not to sound accusing, but it wasn’t easy.  
“And I never gave a flying fuck about them. Do you wanna save yer sister or not?”

Before Ichigo could answer, they heard heavy footsteps heading their way. Grimmjow quickly shoves Ichigo to hide in the nearby closet, and turns just as the big guy appears to the room. He stares at his knocked down partner, then looks up at Grimmjow, who just stood there casually picking his ear.   
At first, the big guy frowns, trying to see under the hood the man wore.   
Once he does make out Grimmjow’s face however, his voice shows his surprise clearly.

“Jeagerjaquez?”  
“Yo.” The man states casually, looking a little irritated; he hadn’t really wanted to deal with either of these two face-to-face.  
“You got some nerve to show your face to us, Sexta.” 

“Don’t call me that. Aizen ain’t running this party.” Grimmjow snorts, pointing at himself.   
The red haired big guy actually chuckles at that, and his tone was awfully casual, like he was chatting with an old friend.

“You were never the easiest to control, that’s what we liked about you.”

“Yeah, well, tell Roy I said hi, in case he does wake up.” Grimmjow comments with a shrug, a slightly maniacal grin on his face. The big guy tsks, a hand near his gun.

“So you assume we’ll just let you walk out of here? As much as I still respect your fighting capabilities, you must be rusty.”

Before the big guy could pull his gun out, Grimmjow charges at him aiming a swift, hard kick at the man’s gut, actually making him stumble backwards several feet, crashing against the wall. The swift attack made him drop his gun to the floor and Grimmjow kicks it away. 

After that, Grimmjow spits to the floor with an unimpressed look, glaring down at the man.

“Just because I don’t work for that sick bastard anymore, it doesn’t mean I can’t kick your sorry ass Edrad.”  
The man huffs, then bursts into a loud laugh, so loud it startles Ichigo, and he almost makes a sound. 

Biting his tongue, the teen wonders if he should do anything; Grimmjow seemed to be on top of things.  
Except, he suddenly notices that the other guy whose head Grimmjow had seemingly smashed earlier was waking up, and picking up the gun that had slid near him.

Without thinking, Ichigo charged out of the closet and tackled the man to the floor, trying to wrestle the weapon off his hand. The guy was strong, but he was clearly taken off guard, allowing Ichigo to wrangle the pistol away from him and even get a good hit on the man’s already broken nose.

This sudden spur of action distracts Grimmjow enough that the big guy – Edrad – charges at him and punches the man, sending him crash against the opposite wall.

“Didn’t think you’d bring back up, it is not like you!” The man laughs, but Grimmjow just gets up, spitting blood from his mouth. He glares at Ichigo now, who had managed to wrestle the gun away from the other man, but was currently pinned down to the floor with a blade on his throat.

“Ya should have stayed hiding, dumbass.”

“Why did you even take me with you in the first place then!?”

“Cause yer sis woulda not have trusted me, moron!”

The two watch the yelling match confused, and then take another look at Ichigo.

“Wait, this is the older Kurosaki kid?” Edrad questions, looking between Ichigo and Grimmjow baffled.  
“Are you helping this wimp to save his sister? You’ve gotten weak!” Di Roy snarls at the now stoic man. He was clearly somehow enhanced, as despite the seemingly hard blow to the head, the man seemed lucid enough to speak clearly and threaten Ichigo with a blade. 

Edrad hums, holding his chin, and now looks at Grimmjow with interested look.  
“Well then; this is a fortunate situation. Why don’t we make a deal?”  
Grimmjow lifts eyebrow, but says nothing. Ichigo attempts to free himself, but the guy holding him was too strong.

“Let us have this one as well, and we’ll let you walk away freely. We won’t even inform Aizen-sama of this little mishap.”

Ichigo looks at Grimmjow with widened eyes; he did not want to believe Grimmjow would agree to that, but there was a hint of interest in those blue eyes as he gazes at Ichigo with a bored look.

“He has been a pain in the ass I admit.”

Ichigo struggles again, now glaring at Grimmjow; he could not be serious!  
The blue haired man looks up at the red haired guy, digging his ear.  
“Ya keep quiet? I ain’t interested in dealing with Aizen ever again.”

“Of course; consider it a favor from an old friend.” The man confirms, and Grimmjow holds his chin, examining Ichigo with a cold look.

“You gotta be kidding! You said you’d help me!”

“I did. Your gut also told me to not trust you, didn’t it?” The man smirks coldly, before walking beside Ichigo, hands in his pockets. The man then suddenly kicks him to the side, making Ichigo groan in pain.  
“This way, I don’t have to repay you. Got nobody to repay for.”

His grin was near malicious now, and Ichigo wanted to charge up and beat the damn bastard; he should’ve known.

“Oi, what’s with that look? You should’ve known better than this.” The man chuckles crouching down and grasping Ichigo’s hair, tugging his head up, so they were face to face. The teen could sense the way the two were following Grimmjow’s every move, clearly somehow approving his cruel and nasty behavior.  
“I told ya to stay the fuck away from me.”

The man growls right at his face and after a moment drops him back to the floor, getting up and brushing through his hair casually. 

“You’re as vicious as ever, aren’t you Jeagerjaquez? Yltfordt would have loved to see this.”  
Grimmjow’s expression darkens briefly, but he then just turns to look up at Edrad with a lazy smirk.  
“Yeah, whatever; give ‘im a nice beating if he turns too fussy.” 

Ichigo glares up at the man, but Grimmjow completely ignores him, turning his back and walking towards the door. Once he vanishes from sight, Ichigo is left alone by the two, who both now look at him.  
“Let’s bring him down to the girl; they should have plenty to chat about.”

Despite his best efforts, Ichigo was dragged downstairs like a sack of potatoes, too weak against these two, and too stunned by Grimmjow’s betrayal. 

A bit of relief washes over him as he spots his sister unharmed, though she was tied up and locked into a small windowless room, where Ichigo was now thrown as well. 

The second the door closes behind him, the young man rushes to his sister, untying her. Karin instantly grabs him into a tight hug, shaking badly. Karin was not one to show her tears easily, but she was extremely scared right now. 

“It’s okay Karin, I’m here.” Ichigo tries to reassure the girl, who just glares up at him with teary eyes.  
“Don’t play dumb Ichi-nii! You’re now trapped here as well!”

The teen could not deny it; the door looked sturdy, and the walls were in a surprisingly good condition as well. However, he had an ace in his sleeve.

Except, once Ichigo reaches for the phone in his pocket, he realizes it was gone. Ichigo pats down his clothes, but cannot find it from anywhere. Then, he recalls the moment Grimmjow had crouched down next to him. The bastard must’ve taken it to make sure he wouldn’t call for help.  
The teen lets out a frustrated groan, rubbing his eyes.

Of course, he should’ve known better!

For once, he should’ve listened to his logic instead of his gut feeling.

“Ichi-nii…what are they gonna do to us?” Karin asks her voice shaky. Ichigo tugs the girl into his arms, holding her tightly. He did not say anything, for he had no clue what was going to happen; he did not know why this gang had an interest in his family.

After a moment of just sitting in silence, Karin finally gives in and starts sobbing. Ichigo holds her close, trying to come up with a way to get out of this situation.

One thing was clear; if he’d make it out alive, Ichigo was going to find a way to make himself stronger. So far he’d just been a punching bag to all these meta-humans, or whatever the hell Grimmjow and his peeps were.

He had to get stronger to protect his family better.

“M-maybe we can pick the lock?” Karin asks after a moment, and shows Ichigo a hairpin she still had in her hair. The teen blinks, and then smirks widely, grasping it. Yeah, maybe that would help.

He walks to the door and inspects the lock. It was old and sturdy, but perhaps he could use the hairpin to unlock it. Ichigo listens in for any noise from the other side, but it seemed the two men were elsewhere right now, probably patching the injuries the other one got.

Carefully, Ichigo pushes the hairpin needle into the lock and starts working on it.  
Chances of this working were minimal, but he had to try. 

After what felt like minutes, he suddenly hears a faint click. Ichigo refrains from throwing his fist in the air, and cautiously pushes the door open. There was nobody on the stairs, and he couldn’t hear any noise from the upper end either.

The teen gestures Karin to come closer, and the girl sneaks behind him, as the two careful ascend the stairs, with Ichigo peeking through the door at the other end of the stairwell. He could hear some faint discussion coming from the kitchen’s direction, indicating the duo was there.

Cautiously, he sneaks out, followed by Karin, and they walk to the opposite direction, trying to make as little noise as possible. 

Then, an old floorboard creaks under Karin’s foot, and they both freeze, listening for the two men. After a moment however, it was fairly clear the two were too focused on their bickering, and the two breathe a sigh of relief, before inching towards the nearest doorway inch by inch. 

Once Ichigo reaches the door, he grasps the handle carefully.  
“What the hell!?”

The two siblings turn around, finding the shark teeth guy glare at them surprised.  
Ichigo thinks quickly, and grasps the curtain on the window beside the door, it comes off, and he throws it at the man, blinding him momentarily while the two sprint out of the door, heading into the woods.

“Liones! The two fuckers are escaping!”

Ichigo grasps Karin into his arms and starts running even faster, praying that he could shake the two off long enough to consider where to go.

Suddenly, he heard a gunshot from behind, and Ichigo felt sharp pain in his leg, making the teen stumble to the ground. Karin rolls off from his arms, stumbling down next to the white bike in a daze.  
The bigger man had shot Ichigo in the foot, and the two were now closing in on him. 

“That was an admirable effort, Kurosaki Ichigo, but I am afraid we’ll have to end your little escape plan here.”

Ichigo curses under his breath, looking at his injured leg. It was bleeding pretty badly.   
He forces himself up however, standing between the two and Karin.  
“I don’t know what your boss wants from us, but let Karin go! You don’t need both of us.”

“Admirable of you to protect your sister. It is a lot like what Grimmjow-san used to do. But I am afraid we cannot let either of you go.” Edrad comments casually, whereas his shorter buddy glares at Ichigo, as if personally offended that they got away. Suddenly, they hear rustling from all around them, and as Ichigo turns to look towards the direction of the noise, he spots a black figure or figures approaching them.

“FREEZE!”  
A voice breaks through the eerie silence of the forest, and suddenly a large amount of troops dressed in black swat gear flood the area, pointing their guns at the surprised kidnappers. The men quickly surround the two, forcing them to the ground and arresting them.   
Ichigo blinks, and then looks at a familiar figure heading his way; it was Urahara.

“Good to see you’re okay, Kurosaki-san.” The man flashes a smile to the teen, who is too exhausted to respond; he just releases the breath he’d been holding, before his legs give away from underneath him. The last thing he saw was a flash of blue somewhere within the woods.

 

The next time Ichigo woke up, he was in a hospital. A proper hospital, not their family clinic. Yuzu was sleeping on a chair beside his bed, and Karin was slumped to the small cough in the corner. He could hear faint voices from outside the room, one of them being his dad. 

His leg still hurt, and he was dizzy, but his head was clear enough to look around properly. 

A second later, Isshin bursts in from the door, and the man near glomps his son, squeezing the living daylights out of Ichigo while crying up tears like he was a human waterfall. 

“I was so worried, what on earth were you thinking Ichigo!? Going out there by yourself!”  
“I wasn’t…” Ichigo attempts to speak, but the tight bear-hug caused him to lose air fairly quickly, making him unable to speak. Eventually though, Isshin does let Ichigo go and scolds him further.  
“You should have waited for the police to do their job; I understand that you wanted to save Karin, but that was reckless even from you!”  
“Well I….”  
“How do you think I felt when I arrived home, finding Yuzu weep by herself and saying you vanished somewhere! If it wasn’t for the text you sent, we would’ve never perhaps found you two!”

Ichigo blinks, then frowns confused.  
A text message?  
“What text message?”  
Isshin blinks confused, then pulls out his phone, showing Ichigo the message.

 

“Found Karin; she’s at the abandoned mansion north from the city that used to belong to Aizen.”

 

Ichigo stares at the message, and for a second his brain short circuits.  
How…he’d never sent that? Hell, he would not have known that place belonged to Aizen, if Grimmjow hadn’t….

Grimmjow.  
Grimmjow had taken his phone. 

The teen frowns, not understanding just what the hell was going on.

“ichigo?” Isshin asks, confused about the frown the boy had on his face. The teen sighs and shakes his head, smiling reassuringly to his dad.  
“Sorry, I must’ve forgotten about that in the heat of the situation.”

“Still, it was lucky that we had info on where exactly the mansion was; makes me wonder how did you know it was his?”  
“Must’ve read it from somewhere in the building, like a door sign or so.” Ichigo shrugs and then yawns, he was still extremely tired.   
“Talking about your phone, we couldn’t find it.” Isshin frowns, looking at his son concerned. Ichigo was unusually pale still, and that frown told the man his son was thinking about something he wasn’t sharing right now.

“I must’ve dropped it.”

The old man examines his son for a while, and then nods with a sigh.  
“We’ll get you a new one; you should rest now.”  
Ichigo nods, closing his eyes. He could really do with some sleep right now. 

 

When he woke up again, it seemed to be an early morning given the dim reddish light coming through from the window. Yuzu and Karin were both gone, probably having gone home by now. It was rather quiet in the hospital right now, and as Ichigo looks at the clock, he could tell why; it was 5: 30 in the morning.   
As he glances at the window again, Ichigo suddenly realizes it was open.

A chill travels through his spine, and Ichigo could tell he wasn’t alone in the room.

That’s when he spots the hooded figure, standing at the opposite end of the room, leaning against a wall in the shadows. A flash of white teeth appears in the darkness, as the damn bastard grins at him.

“Sup, Kurosaki?”

Ichigo pushes himself up and glares at the man with the intensity of thousand suns, or at least that’s how it felt like. The man just snickers at his face, and paces closer, stopping at the feet end of the bed. 

“Got you good, didn’t I?”  
“You bastard!” Ichigo hisses at the man, trying to get up but unable to do so.

“Why the hell are you here!?” He demands from his spot, his anger clearly just amusing Grimmjow further.

Grimmjow snorts, digging his ear like he often did when not really caring what the other one felt or had to say.  
“Told ya; I always pay my debt.”  
“What the hell are you about? You abandoned me!”  
The man sighs dramatically, pulling out Ichigo’s phone from his pocket.  
“How do you think yer cop friends found you?”  
The teen pauses and just stares at the man with a surprised look; so Grimmjow had been the one who sent that message?  
The man lets Ichigo swim in that confusion for a while, before breaking the silence.

“I wasn’t gonna let ‘em have you two; I just wanted to use you as a bait; I knew they’d not kill you right off the bat.”  
“…What?”  
“I could’ve gone and kicked their asses the first time I scouted the place out, but that would’ve violated the agreement Nel made with ‘em. So, I took you with me in order to get their attention away from me so I could sneak about.”

Ichigo just glares at the man again, who shrugs and digs his ear. Part of the teen wanted to ask what the hell did Nel have to do with anything that happened, but he was too angry to care for any answers to the thousands of questions swirling in his head. 

“Didn’t work out; you slowed me down too much with your stupid questions so that Edrad managed to catch up on me. Thanks for that by the way; showing my face to ‘em is gonna put me and Nel at risk.” The man glares at Ichigo, who was having none of it.

“You could have just told me from the start what you intended! I would’ve done it anyway then!”

Grimmjow looks almost surprised by his words, and then rolls his eyes.  
“Wouldn’t have been as convincing to the two.” He flashes a maniacal grin at Ichigo, who huffs out a breath and slumps back to the bed, crossing his arms.

“You could’ve just sent that message to the police anonymously; you didn’t have to do it like this.”  
“I could, but it would’ve been less fun.”

“You’re such a fucking dick!”  
Ichigo almost yells at the man, only to be abruptly cut off as he places a hand to cover Ichigo’s mouth, glancing at the door with a frown.  
“Pipe down Kurosaki; if yer cop buddies catch me here, it is gonna be a pain in the ass.”  
“You didn’t have to come at all.” Ichigo points out with a quiet snarl.

“No, but I figured I should let you know what actually was going on.” Grimmjow muses quietly, still gazing at the door. His tone was unusually soft. The man shakes his head with an irritated huff, as if he noticed it himself and was angry at himself for it.

“Honestly, doing it like this was a win-win situation for me. If you went and died, I’d be free of debt. If you survived, that was good for yer fam.”  
Ichigo glares at the man, who just smirks at him.

“And I had to drop by; had to return yer phone after all. Seriously, that Hime-chick keeps spamming you with bullshit constantly, it’s annoying.” He adds, further adding fuel to the fire. If Ichigo had not been feeling so weak, he would've socked the arrogant bastard to his jaw already. 

With that, he throws it to Ichigo, then heads back towards the window he’d apparently come in from.  
“…So does this mean you’ve repaid your debt or whatever?” Ichigo asks after a moment of checking his phone, just to see that Grimmjow hadn’t messed with it.   
The man pauses, glancing towards him.

“It depends; now you owe me.”  
He comments with a smirk, before literally jumping out of the window.

Sure, they were only on the second floor, but it was still a huge drop.  
However, after a moment Ichigo could see the man heading away across the dimly lit pathway on the inner yard of the hospital. After a moment of watching after him, Ichigo sighs and turns his attention back at the phone. He notices there was a new note in it that he hadn’t made. 

Hesitantly, Ichigo opens it, finding a message addressed to him.

“In case you won’t be awake once I drop this off; I was just messin’ with them, I had to get their attention away from me so I could get your cop-buddies to rescue you. I had to pretend that I was ditching your ass ‘cause if Aizen finds out I helped you guys out, it could be bad for Nelliel.   
If you wanna know why Aizen’s after your family, you might wanna ask your old man about it.

P.S That was a pretty good tackle from someone of your size; Di Roy’s gonna whine over that burn for weeks I bet.  
\- G”

Ichigo just gazes at the message, and then puts the phone away with a sigh.   
He was too tired still to process any of this.   
The teen had to get more sleep, maybe he could process the last night’s events properly then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So....I edited this from my original draft in the end, making Grimmjow a bit more like his dickish self as I felt he was becoming a bit too nice a bit too fast.   
> Because I feel each time Grimmjow does something nice, he just has to be backhanded about it and mess with Ichigo. xD


	7. A new plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo learns more details regarding to what is going on, including details about past events that he had not been aware of. He also makes a decision; he needs to get stronger to protect his sisters better

By the next morning, Ichigo already felt much better, so he was allowed to go home. His dad did not come and pick him up for some reason, so instead Urahara’s assistant Tessai drove him home.

Ichigo did not even try to have small talk with the stern looking man, who seemed to understand his wish for silence, as he did not attempt to initiate conversation either.

Ichigo would still have to wear crutches for couple of days, but the teen was used to things like that; he’d injured his foot before.  
Right now, what was more important to him was confronting his dad and ask about just what the hell was going on.

Why was Karin kidnapped and not killed off the bat?  
What the hell did they have to do with somebody like Aizen?  
What the hell WAS Grimmjow anyway?   
If dad had known how dangerous he was, why had he let the man in their house so many times and not said anything?

What had Grimmjow meant when he mentioned some deal with Nelliel?

Once Ichigo opens the door into his house, ready to fire an onslaught of questions at Isshin’s way, the teen realizes they had visitors. 

Isshin was currently having a conversation with the blond haired woman as well as a man with long, silvery hair Ichigo had never seen before. As he just stands there dumbfounded, having not expected to see Harribel there, the group turns towards him, and Isshin flashes him a smile, waving.

“Welcome home Ichigo!”  
Ichigo just stares at him with a dumbfounded look.

Upon noticing his son’s confused face, the man rubs his head, and gestures towards the gentle looking man.  
“This is Ukitake, he’s uh…an old friend from work back when I was with the force.”  
The man smiles and greets the teen, who just stumbles his way to the kitchen and grabs himself a glass of water. After drinking it, he slams the glass to the table and turns to glare at Isshin.

“You owe me a LOT of answers old man!”

Isshin rubs his head awkwardly, but the silver haired man waves his hand reassuringly, and turns to look at Ichigo with an apologetic smile.  
“Indeed after what happened to your little sister, you must be confused of what’s going on. Well, we were just in fact discussing about this with your father and Ms. Harribel.”  
The woman turns to look at Ichigo too with a stoic face, and says nothing. 

“What does this have to do with her?”  
“Well, you see…” Isshin rubs his head again, unsure on how to deal with the situation.   
“Dinner is ready!” Yuzu suddenly announces from the kitchen, and the two men seem to forget the confused teen and head to eat, chatting happily. Ichigo almost wants to throw the nearest object at his old man, but Harribel’s calm voice stops him.  
“Be patient; they still aren’t sure how much they should tell you and need time to figure it out.”  
Ichigo sighs and rubs his eyes, not liking the situation at all.  
“I am sorry that Jeagerjaquez pulled such a stunt on you.” Harribel comments after a moment of awkward silence, and Ichigo huffs, shaking his head.

“I should have known he was gonna fuck me over somehow.”

“You know, he was honestly relieved you didn’t die. He took a great risk by bringing you there.”  
Ichigo frowns and looks up at the woman.  
“I still don’t get why he did it. Looking how he was able to sneak around by himself, having me as bait didn’t make much sense.”

Harribel hums, and then offers a slight smile.  
“Grimmjow is not the most logical person.”  
She pauses, looking away for a moment, before continuing.

“He may have sympathized with you about the whole situation, given he knew how it could feel like.”  
“Still….”

“He’s always been…instinctive. He often does what he feels he should, not necessarily what seemingly makes sense.”  
That Ichigo could believe. 

 

After the awkward dinner was over, where Ichigo poked his food and waited the two old men to be done with their idle chat, he went to sit on the living room with the white haired man, who’d promised to explain him as much as he could.

“So, first things first; my name is Ukitake, and I am the head of internal investigations within the force. Your father was one of the officers who worked with me on a case relating to both the man you know as Aizen, as well as Ms. Harribel, Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez, and Ms. Nel.”  
Ichigo just nods, waiting for the man to continue.

“Aizen used to work within our establishment as well, but there had been rumors he was also leading some sort of large underground organization, so your father as well as Urahara investigated it back then. This was before you were born.”

Ichigo’s eyes widen, but he still says nothing.  
“Unfortunately, Aizen caught wind of our investigation and fled. We spent years trying to locate him, up until what happened to your mother. Isshin decided then that he did not want to be involved in this anymore, fearing for your safety. This was also around the time Urahara had to drop out as well, although his reasons were different.”

Ichigo frowns; so did this mean that his mum….that she hadn’t died because of a robbery?

“Yes, I’m afraid she was assassinated by Aizen’s men as a warning to your father, as he was getting too close for comfort.” Ukitake explains with calm, but also sympathetic and sad tone. He’d met Masaki a couple of times, and really liked the woman; she’d been a good match with Isshin.   
“….How do Nel and others connect to all this?”

Ukitake brushes through his hair with a sigh, looking at Ichigo seriously now.  
“I cannot tell you that much about this, but what I can tell, is that Ms. Nelliel was supposed to be the key to track down Aizen, but after her attempted murder, she was unable to recall the information she had for us.”

“I heard she was put into some sort of hospital…but it didn’t work out.”  
Ukitake nods, a deep frown on his face.

“We…realized too late that Aizen had his claws on that place as well. Poor Ms. Nelliel’s condition just ended up worsening by the purposefully incorrect treatment she received.”

“Then why didn’t you inform her close ones and get her out of there before it was too late?”  
“We weren’t aware of it, until Mr. Jeagerjaquez showed up to the station, spatting at our faces for breaking the promise. He was so aggressive we were concerned he may end up in trance.”

Ichigo frowns; he’d seen the term “trance” in the file about Grimmjow. Just what the hell was that?  
Ukitake seems to realize Ichigo didn’t understand the term and smiles apologizing.

“I cannot say much about it. All you need to know is that it’s dangerous.”  
The teen had nothing to say to that, so he just nods.  
“After that, he vanished for couple of years, we couldn’t find him, and some suspected he may have gone back to Aizen….or worse.”

Ichigo gazes at Ukitake for a moment, and then shakes his head.  
“That bastard’s too arrogant to kill himself.”

“He seems to have left an impression already.” Ukitake hums with a lightly amused smile. Ichigo grumbles under his breath, impression alright.  
“So, what’s gonna happen now? Why did Aizen want to kidnap one of us?”  
Ukitake sighs and glances at the old man, who was currently arguing about something silly with Karin, while Yuzu was showing her room to Harribel.

“We are not certain; frankly I do not see the reason behind Aizen wanting to kidnap one if Isshin’s children. He has no further knowledge to the case aside from what he knew back then, and it wasn’t enough.”  
The man sighs, and then smiles at Ichigo.

“Worry not about this, Ichigo; we have things under control, and we’ll be assuring your family’s safety. Given the fact Aizen has become more active again; it is only a matter of time before he makes a mistake.” The man sounded confident about his words, but Ichigo could not be so sure. He nods nevertheless.

“…How about Nel? Why is Harribel here by the way?”

Ukitake hums and glances at the woman, who’d just come back to the kitchen with Yuzu, smiling faintly at the orange haired child.  
“Well, there is a suspicion that Aizen’s sudden action may have something to do with the connection your family has made with them, so we had to discuss about that. Namely Nelliel’s safety.”

The man sighs and turns to look at Ichigo again.  
“We wish to bring her somewhere safer – truly safer – but I am afraid none of us have enough what it takes to convince her brother about this.”

“Why don’t you just force the issue? I doubt it’s any of his business, he ain’t Nel’s dad.”  
Ukitake gazes at Ichigo for a moment, then sighs, shaking his head.

“It is not that simple. Grimmjow is not somebody we wish to agitate, for his enhancements have made him unstable; if we’d end up angering him, he could easily take out at least ten men with his bare hands, and we want to avoid bloodpath.”

Ichigo could not stop but frown a little annoyed now; sure, Grimmjow was a huge dick and he had a temper, but even Harribel had said the man was not unreasonable. Somehow, Ichigo believed it.

Although, she’d also said that Grimmjow often acted on impulse, so there was that too.

Still, he doubted this was as hard as Ukitake made it sound like.  
“Grimmjow might be a dick, but you can actually reason with him.”  
The man flashes Ichigo a smile, and suddenly he had an unusually eager look to his eyes.  
“So I’ve heard from Ms. Harribel. She also told us that you may be able to convince him to let us shield Ms. Nelliel.”

Ichigo blinks, baffled.  
Why the hell would he be able to do that?

“Perhaps you could try and talk to him about this? It is of crucial importance, we do not wish any further harm to fall on Nelliel’s way.”  
Yeah, neither did Ichigo, but he was not keen on facing the man, not after the stunt he’d pulled.

“I’m just a university student; he’s some sort of dangerous former criminal.” Ichigo points out, and the man brushes his hair awkwardly.  
“I am aware. Trust me, I would not ask you if we had a choice.”

As much as this seemed like another bad idea, it was hard to say no when Ukitake was looking at him with such hopeful eyes, this was apparently highly important to the man. Perhaps it was regret from failing to protect the woman last time, so he was keen on getting another chance.  
“Okay, fine. I can try.” Ichigo sighs, rubbing his eyes.  
“Great! Hopefully you’ll be more successful than us.”  
Ichigo sincerely doubted that. 

 

That evening, Ichigo finally called his friends, who’d been sending him tons of messages, asking if he was okay. Grimmjow had been right; Orihime had been especially worried, sending 20 + messages.

Ichigo was just thankful the man had not replied to any of them, god knows what the hell the bastard would’ve typed.

After considering it, he sends them all the same message, informing them that he’d been in a bit of an accident, and he’d talk to them tomorrow at school.

He got several replies back, with most of them being complaints about his ability to get into trouble. Only Orihime’s reply was different, asking what had happened exactly. Ichigo just reassures her that they’d talk tomorrow, and that it was too long of a story to share through phone.

After getting a simple “ok,” as a reply from her, Ichigo leans back on his chair, being careful of his injured leg. 

Suddenly, his phone rings. As Ichigo checks it, it was an unknown caller. It could be another sales person, but Ichigo’s gut was twisting strangely, so after a moment of hesitation, he picks it up.

“Hello?”

“I swear; you’re such a pain in the ass even when you’re not around; Harribel just bitched at me for messing with you.”

Ichigo frowns.  
“How the hell did you get my number?”

“You dense or somethin’ Kurosaki? I had your phone for like, hours.” The man chuckles at the other end. He sounded a lot less annoyed than what his first words indicated. 

“Why are you calling me now?” The teen questions, unable to stop his suspicion; Grimmjow had in fact messed with him pretty bad just 24 hours ago.

“I figured you’re gonna wanna talk to me anyway, based on the description Tia gave me about her visit to yer place.” The man comments simply, and Ichigo could hear the sound of a lighter; he was smoking again.

“Well first; I’m still not done at being mad at you.”

“And I will never be done NOT caring, so move along.”

Ichigo wanted to groan, but he honestly did have something else to focus on.  
Before that though…

“What the hell is a Trance?”

Grimmjow pauses for a moment, probably taken by surprise by the question.  
“…..So they did show you the files, huh?”  
“That, and Ukitake mentioned it.”

“So they’re pouring all the info in your pea-brain now.” Grimmjow did not sound happy, and Ichigo was suddenly concerned that perhaps bringing this up was not the smartest choice for his end goal.  
Eventually though, he hears a sigh from other end, as well as a slumping sound, indicating the man had sat down.

“Remember what you saw in the fight club?”  
“Yeah, I’m still kind of curious why you were there.”

“Irrelevant. Basically, Trance refers to this mental shit that happened to some of Aizen’s lab-rats. Ironically, from those who got it, I was the best at controlling it, but also my fits are the worst if they do happen.”

“So…this thing makes you all twitchy and grumpy?”

“No, it’s…” Grimmjow pauses, as if trying to figure out how to explain it.

“You kinda lose track of your sense of self. Your injuries, the opponent’s injuries, nothing matters. It’s like this extreme blood-frenzy that you cannot stop once it happens.”

Ichigo swallows down nervously; yeah, that sounded sort of like what he’d seen from Grimmjow in that match.

“What you saw there wasn’t it by the way; it was merely a beginning stage.”  
Okay… that sounded pretty damn terrifying. 

“…I see.”

“I doubt that’s what you wanted to talk about, Kurosaki.” Grimmjow snorts after a moment, blowing smoke out of his lungs as he leans back on the couch. The man glances at Nel who was currently sleeping on the couch beside him, cuddled up under a thick blanket.

“Yeah…Ukitake wishes to bring Nelliel somewhere safer, I guess they worry Aizen will be after her soon again.”

Grimmjow snorts at that, no shit.

“Honestly, why did you take me with you? That’s something I just don’t get. You could’ve gone there by yourself if you wanted to repay me or something. You could have informed the police, even anonymously.”

Ichigo questions after a moment of silence.

“I told you; it was for fun.”

“I can’t imagine you being that sick, Jeagerjaquez.” Ichigo states firmly.  
He wasn’t entirely sure if he believed his own point, but the teen stuck by his words regardless.

For a moment Grimmjow says nothing, and Ichigo begins to think the man had closed the phone. However, he could eventually hear a sigh and some rustling, and a door being opened.  
Grimmjow had now walked to the bedroom for more privacy.

“If you want a logical answer, I ain’t got any. I just figured you’d want to do something to help your lil sister, given how eager you are to help even potential murderers if they make you pity them enough.”  
The dark jab did not go unnoticed, but Ichigo doesn’t react to it.  
Honestly, the files did not actually change Ichigo’s opinion on the man, strangely enough; he’d already known Grimmjow was dangerous if he wanted to be. 

“It wasn’t pity, just common decency.”  
“Either way; I didn’t have a particular reason, just felt like it.”  
“Harribel did say you’re very instinctive person.”

Grimmjow hums, then chuckles a bit, now sounding tired again.  
“Yeah yeah, she loves to bitch at me about it.”

There’s a pause in the air, as if the blue haired man was a little hesitant about his next words.  
“I don’t get why you’d still want to help after what you found out about me.”

“What makes you think I still do?”

“Yer still talking to me.”

Ichigo huffs, but then smiles a bit. The man had a point.

“I don’t know honestly; the stuff I red from the files was pretty bad, but…” The teen frowns unsure on how to explain it.

“I guess it’s harder to digest it when I haven’t really seen it myself. Plus despite your threats, I’m still alive, so…”  
It wasn’t a very good explanation, but it was better than anything else Ichigo could offer. His gut-instinct, while good for him, would sound crazy in the eyes of somebody who barely knew him.  
Grimmjow snorts at his explanation, predictably.

“You’re a reckless moron, you know that? Just because I haven’t killed you yet, doesn’t mean I won’t.”  
Despite the serious message of the words, Ichigo’s gut told him Grimmjow likely didn’t think he would himself. As much as the orange haired teen annoyed the man, he just couldn’t hate Ichigo that much.

Plus, he was honestly over of the whole killing thing anyway.

 

“And you’re a complete, utter dick, so we’re even.”  
Grimmjow chuckles at that, there was no use in denying it.

 

“…..I do have to wonder though. With that record, how was Nel able to get such a deal that they let you walk freely?”  
Ichigo muses, not really meaning to actually ask it out loud, but it was too late for Grimmjow had heard him already.  
“Well aren’t you full of questions now?” Grimmjow grunts, though he doesn’t blame Kurosaki for asking that; it did sound kind of illogical once you knew the shit he’d done.  
“Hell if I know; Nel does, but she doesn’t remember. They seem to have some reason to honor the deal despite what happened to her memory.”  
“I suppose they feel guilty about it.”  
“Hell yea they should!” Grimmjow spats out involuntarily, and then takes in a deep breath, glancing towards the living room. Nelliel was still dozing happily, having not woken up by his outburst.  
Hearing that reply, Ichigo began to doubt he’d be able to convince Grimmjow about what he was supposed to. The man had every reason not to trust them after what happened last time, with the police failing to provide Nelliel with proper safety and support.  
But, he’d promised Ukitake he’d try.

 

“About that….”  
“Let me guess, they asked you to convince me to lend Nel to them again, didn’t they?” 

The man snorts before Ichigo could continue. 

“….Kind of. I did tell them I might not be able to do it though.”

“Those fuckers sure put a lot of faith in you for some reason, huh?” The man muses smoking his cigarette. Ichigo frowns a bit, noting that the man did not sound sarcastic or anything like he normally would have with such a comment. It was simply a neutral observation.

“Yeah. I don’t know why they think I’d get through that stubborn head of yours any better, we’ve only known for a short period of time.” Ichigo bites his lip, really having no clue on how to even begin convincing the man. This whole thing felt ridiculous now, and he almost wanted to end the call. 

Grimmjow rubs his eyes at the other end.

He didn’t know what to answer to Kurosaki right now honestly; his experience and logic told him there was NO FUCKING WAY he should trust those damn useless morons after what happened last time, but…   
The man glances at Nel again; it was all too clear they couldn’t just keep going like this. Nelliel needed help, and he needed a goddamn break from all the chaos in his current life.   
Plus…after the stunt he’d pulled, somehow it had been less fun than Grimmjow had expected. He actually felt almost bad for tricking Kurosaki into thinking he’d ditch his ass.   
Why the hell he felt bad about it, Grimmjow didn’t know, and perhaps didn’t want to find out either.

“Grimmjow?”  
Ichigo asks, probably wondering if he’d closed the call already or something.  
Giving one last glance at Nel, the man makes his decision.

Screw it.

 

“…Alright, fine. But I wanna know where they’re gonna put her.”

Ichigo was honestly surprised to have the man agree so quickly, but he smiles nevertheless, it probably audible from his voice.  
“I’m sure they’ll tell you; Ukitake sounded really reluctant to piss you off.”  
“Wise choice.”  
Ichigo rolls his eyes at that.

 

After the call ends, the teen just sits there, recalling trough everything he’d experienced and learned so far.

It was the strangest thing; he had every reason and then some to not want to be involved, let alone even bother with the man, but somehow… Ichigo just could not fully buy the monstrous image those files had tried to give to him. 

Grimmjow was a dick, he was nasty if he wanted to, and violent.

But…   
The teen sighs and rubs his eyes. 

Perhaps talking to his friends tomorrow would help make sense to his thoughts about the man; he just had to make sure he did not talk about certain case details Ukitake had revealed to him, sensing that it was not for everybody’s ears. 

 

As expected, his friends were fussing over him the second they noticed the crutches and the cast. Well, by fussing, Rukia was berating him for being so reckless and clumsy, Renji was poking the cast, asking what the hell he’d done, and Orihime looked like she wanted to cry. Chad and Ishida both remained quiet, though the glasses wearing guy did give him a scolding look.

“Let him breathe; I’m sure Ichigo will tell us all what happened.” Chad tells them all calmly, and the trio moves away, giving Ichigo space so he could sit down on the bench under the tree they were next to.  
The teen takes a deep breath, and tells them everything that happened.

Well, everything sans the details that Ukitake had told him, like the fact his mum was murdered by a gang and not a random robber. Once he was done, Renji and Rukia looked predictably angry.

“What a dick move! If the bastard was gonna pull trickery like that, he could’ve warned you in the first place!” Renji spats out, clearly wanting to find the man and pummel him to the ground – not a wise idea based on what Ichigo knew.

“Why didn’t he just go to the police?” Rukia questions understandably, face in a deep frown.

Ichigo was unsure on how to answer to that; he couldn’t really give the explanation Grimmjow gave him as it would not satisfy his friends.

“I think…he thought they wouldn’t make it in time. He probably improvised when we got caught, I don’t think he intended to seem like he was gonna ditch me.” Ichigo mumbles out, rubbing his head awkwardly. Rukia clearly wasn’t buying it, but as the silence mounted, the woman sighs, understanding she was not going to get any further answers for now.

“Is Karin-chan okay though?” Orihime asks, probably attempting to direct the conversation elsewhere as she’d noticed how uneasy Ichigo was.

“Yeah; still a little shaken, but she’s okay. The police are patrolling the area and probably surveilling our house for a while.”  
Inoue nods at that, seemingly relieved; she could only imagine how scared the poor girl had been in that situation.

“About the person Karin saw though; is she going to have to take a witness stand or something?”  
“I don’t know; She did head to the station this morning where those two are kept, but I think they have other plans for the two, given they may have some useful info.”  
Rukia hums, holding her chin.

“Yes, I remember my brother mentioning something like that too.”  
Oh yeah; Byakua also worked in the force, under the same division as his dad had.   
“So Byakua is involved in this whole thing?” Renji questions, gaining a shrug from Rukia.  
“He’s not exactly talkative.”

Ichigo was about to comment on that, when the bell rang; it was the start of their first classes.

 

Due to his crutches, it was a little harder to get by, but Ichigo managed to go through his day without too many incidents, aside from dropping his lunch on the cafeteria as Mizuru accidentally collided with him. The girl had apologized profusely, but Ichigo had just told her it was okay.

Being unable to walk home – not to mention the worry for his safety – one of his dad’s officer friends picked him up and brought him home. It was Matsumoto, who was eager to chat with him. Ichigo just nodded and hummed awkwardly as a response; she could be a bit overwhelming. 

“I must say I am sorry you ended up dragged in the middle of all this Ichigo; wish we would’ve caught Aizen already years ago when your dad still worked with us.”

“It’s okay; I’m sure you are doing your best.”  
The woman gives him an encouraging smile.  
“Sure we are! Ukitake was very glad to hear you managed to convince that brute to hand over Nel-chan for a safer location; poor girl has been through too much.”  
“So you’ve met the two?”

Matsumoto rubs her head, smiling awkwardly.  
“Not really; I’ve just gotten a description about them from your sisters. Yuzu seems to be scared of Jeagerjaquez.”

Ichigo wasn’t surprised about that, still though…

“He’s got his nasty side, but honestly, I think he can be decent if he wants to.”  
“Huh, I’ll take your word for it.”

 

Once at home, Ichigo manages to somehow bring himself upstairs and slump to his bed. His foot still hurt pretty badly, so he took some painkillers the doctors had prescribed for him. After that the teen just closes his eyes and attempts to relax for a bit; moving around with crutches caused his arms and shoulders tense pretty bad, and his muscles ached now.

After a while, Isshin appears to his room, unusually calm and collected.  
“Are you feeling better now?”

Ichigo hums and sits up slowly, looking at the man with lift eyebrow. It seemed like his old man wanted to discuss about something more serious with him, hence the lack of goofy ridiculousness.  
“Leg hurts. What’s up?”

Isshin sits down to his chair and crosses his arms, flashing a smile at Ichigo.  
“Good; I heard from Urahara that Ukitake that they are moving ahead with the matter regarding to Ms. Nelliel.”

“Will she really be safe this time?”  
“They are taking extra measures for her safety.”

Ichigo just nods; he wanted to believe they would not screw up this time.  
“How about Tia, and Grimmjow?”

Isshin goes quiet for a moment, then rubs his eyes with a sigh.  
“Ichigo…I know you left with him to go look for Karin. Only those in the force, or within Aizen’s ranks, would have known about that mansion. That text did not come from you.”  
The teen couldn’t deny that, so he remained quiet.

“Why did you lie?”  
“I…”

Ichigo wasn’t sure honestly; he could have told his dad about the bullshit the bluenette pulled.  
It was just…he’d had a gut feeling it could be a bad idea. 

“….Did you think he might get in trouble if his involvement gets out there?”

“….I… suppose so. I mean, given what I know now, it does sound like something he’d rather not have happening. It seems you guys knew already though, so I guess it was for naught.” Ichigo sighs, rubbing his eyes. He still had too many uncertainties and questions when it came to the man. 

Isshin hums, examining his son with a slight smile.

“I suppose you see more in him than most; you only really cover for those whom you think deserves it.”  
That was the thing, Ichigo didn’t really know if Grimmjow did.   
“I doubt this was what you wanted to talk to me about.”

“Well…Ukitake requested me to ask you to not speak of any of your knowledge to anybody, including your friends.”

“I already told about the kidnapping part, but didn’t mention anything about the whole Aizen thing.”  
“Good to know; then again I figured you’d guess it yourself.”  
“Yeah, I did get the vibe it’s not something I should go and openly share with people.”  
Isshin flashes a wider smile, and reaches to ruffle Ichigo’s hair now, annoying the teen who reminds the old man that he wasn’t five anymore. Isshin just shushes him and pats his head, before getting a pillow thrown at his face. 

“But seriously dad; how about those two?”

“Well…he was highly reluctant to trust us, so I doubt Grimmjow-san will agree to any sort of protection. In all seriousness though, Ukitake doesn’t think they are in any particular danger; neither of them really know what information Nelliel had, and I am fairly sure Aizen knows it as well.”

Ichigo was not convinced about that, but he knew all too well the stubborn bastard would refuse any help, so he just sighs and nods.

Besides, Grimmjow was strong, and he was fairly sure Harribel was strong too.   
Those two would likely be fine.

 

After few more days, Ichigo’s cast was removed, and he was able to walk normally again, aside from slight aching every now and then. 

He’d kept his promise and not told his friends anything further about what exactly was going on, although he could tell Inoue and Rukia both sensed he was hiding things. After three first days however, they stopped asking about it, namely because Rukia had gotten a stern order from her brother to not ask about it from Ichigo.

So, Byakua was involved after all huh?

His life was mostly normal, although Ichigo could not shake the uneasy feeling of being watched; he knew it was likely just the officers checking on him and making sure he was safe, but it was still uncomfortable.  
Furthermore, he was paranoid over his sister’s safety, fearing that they’d be snatched again, and this time nobody would come for their rescue. 

He was currently lying awake in the middle of the night, unable to fall back asleep after a horrifying nightmare involving his sisters being dragged into some sort of dark abyss with no way for him to help them.  
It was becoming unbearable, and his friends noticed too.

Orihime had asked just today if he was okay, as he’d fallen asleep during a math lesson, gaining an earful from their teacher. 

 

The teen sits up and rubs his eyes.  
This was getting ridiculous; he was constantly paranoid and tired.  
………

Ichigo lets out a chuckle, as he suddenly realizes that THIS was how Grimmjow must’ve felt before his breakdown. 

As he sighs and gets up from the bed, Ichigo spots his cellphone on the table. He picks it up, and scrolls down to the call-log. Grimmjow’s number was still displayed there.

Perhaps his tired state was causing him to have a lapse in judgment, but Ichigo pushes the call-back button, and waits. His heart was beating loudly, and the teen wasn’t sure if he wanted the man to pick up or not.  
He was fairly sure he wouldn’t.

So once the call does connect, Ichigo is stunned silent for a moment.  
“I shoulda not have called you after all if you were gonna fucking wake me up in the middle of the night.” Grimmjow grumbles at him and yawns, though he doesn’t sound overly angry.

Ichigo’s brain shorts out for few more precious seconds, before he manages to answer.

“I…wait, how did you know it was me?”  
“Saved it.”

This surprises the teen, but he decides not to ask why; Grimmjow had already reminded him he did not always have a solid reason for his actions. 

“So? The hell you want now Kurosaki?”

Ichigo pauses again for a moment, suddenly not knowing what he should say.  
“….Why aren’t you calling me a kid anymore?”

The teen wants to smack himself for that stupid question, but he’d been curious about it for so long.  
He could hear Grimmjow snort at the other end, probably rolling his eyes at the absurd question. 

“Let’s just say it would feel hella awkward to me.” He eventually answers reluctantly, sounding almost like this particular topic was somehow unpleasant for him.

That honestly didn’t explain anything, but it was not really important anyway. 

“Yeah, well I did not really call to ask about that.”  
“I seriously hope you didn’t; yer wasting my time otherwise.”

“I…” Ichigo pauses again, staring at his reflection from the window surface. Why did he call exactly? What was he hoping to achieve? Grimmjow would not show him sympathy over his current mood, even if he understood it. The blue haired man wasn’t exactly the most compassionate person, based on how nasty he could get.

Except…was that true? Grimmjow did care for Nel.

“Let’s just say I sort of get you better right now.”

Grimmjow hums at that but says nothing, which gives Ichigo courage to continue.  
“After this whole kidnapping deal…I’ve been really paranoid. It’s driving me crazy that I cannot sleep.”  
“Welcome to the club.” Grimmjow snorts in his typical asshole-ish fashion.  
Ichigo huffs out a sigh, rubbing his eyes.

“I fear that they’ll get in trouble again, and I won’t be strong enough to protect them.”

“No shit; if Aizen wants ‘em, yer weak as fuck self can’t do shit about it.”

“I know! That’s why…”

Ichigo pauses, as a thought appears in his head. It was crazy stupid idea, but…  
“Could you help me get stronger?”

Grimmjow remains silent for a long while, and then bursts into another one of those maniacal laughs, causing Ichigo to instantly regret his words.

“You’re kidding me, Kurosaki? Me? I could bloody kill you with my pinkie.”

“Maybe so, but at least I’d know what to expect from the other potential metahumans I may have to face.”  
Grimmjow falls silent at that.   
“I know you think it’s a ridiculous idea, but I need to do something; I need some sort of reassurance that I’d at least have a chance to protect them.”

A long silence falls between them after Ichigo’s outburst.

Finally though, there was a long sigh at the other end, and Grimmjow ‘s voice breaks the tense silence.  
He sounded reluctant again as he spoke.

“There’s no fucking way they’ll let you do that; I’m already considered dangerous for obvious reasons, and given the current situation…”

“I know, but…”

“We gotta do this in secret somehow.”

Ichigo goes quiet, having not expected the man to agree so easily.  
A smile creeps up his face eventually, and he’s glad Grimmjow cannot see it, suspecting the man would finally make good to his threats and sock him in the jaw or something, probably breaking his skull.

“Thank you.”

“Don’t fucking thank me yet Kurosaki; this could well get you killed.”

“I’ll take that risk.”

The man snorts at the other end again, but once he speaks, his voice sounds amused in a less malicious, and more pleasant manner, which was rare. 

“You’re reckless sonofabitch, you know that?”  
“Pot, the kettle called…”

“Watch your mouth Kurosaki; I might start liking you.”

It was Ichigo’s turn to snort, although he also could not stop the slight jolt his heart did for some reason.  
“I doubt you are capable of that.”

Grimmjow doesn’t respond to the jab, just tells him he’ll send a message later on where they can meet. As Ichigo closes his phone, a strange flurry of emotions enters his system; anxieties, anticipation, slight joy, but also fear. He was happy that Grimmjow had agreed to this, but Ichigo also knew this could very well be an extremely bad idea.

Plus, having to do all of this in secret did not sound good either.  
It was too late to back down now however, Ichigo was no coward.  
He’d go and do this, because he needed to get stronger.

He needed to be able to protect his family better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you know what happens when you get a bigger plot idea mid-way writing that changes the direction you originally intended? confusion, re-writing and a lot of mental table-flips, that's what  
> The focus is going to start shifting away from Nelliel a bit and turn to Ichigo due to what I've now got planned, though she will still be important.


	8. Bonding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo begins his secret training with Grimmjow, and the two begin to bond thanks to few incidents that happen during these meetings.   
> Ichigo learns that Grimmjow can be less of a dick if he wants to be.

Sneaking out during the day to meet with Grimmjow was out of question for now, given the surveillance on their house. So instead, the arranged meeting was on the weekend, at night, allowing Ichigo to sleep late during the day without seeming suspicious.

With a deep sigh, the teen listened for any noise coming from the house, indicating that anyone was awake. He heard none, so the teen slips out through his window, using the shadows of the trees on their yard as his advantage. 

He knew where the surveillance team was, so it was relatively easy for him to figure out a way past them without being seen - he’d been told about them because obviously nobody expected him to sneak out of the house like this.

It was risky, going out by himself like this in the middle of the night, but he had to do this, or Ichigo would be unable to sleep properly at night.   
Eventually, he reaches the spot they’d agreed to meet on; it was the same lake where they’d found Nelliel earlier. 

Ichigo found it surprising Grummjow had picked this particular place, but figured it was some sort of theraphy thing or so. 

He found the man already there, smoking a cigarette with a hood over his head.

”Yer late.” He says simply, flicking the smoke to the water before turning to look at Ichigo. His blue eyes almost glow in the dark, and it was a surreal, almost unnerving sight.

”Sneaking around is not as easy to everybody as it is for you.” Ichigo points out simply, noting that his heartbeat was already rising slowly. 

His brain decided to go through all the possible warnings he’d gotten so far - many from Grimmjow himself - but Ichigo shook his head and ignored them.   
”Havin’ doubts?” The man questions with amused lift of eyebrow, and Ichigo just gives him a dull look.

”You said once; didn’t take me for a coward. Well I ain’t one.”  
”Good.” The man smirks, and before Ichigo could react, kicks him in the gut, sending the teen stumble backwards.

”Because if you wanna do this, you might wanna bring out the best you got, Kurosaki. Otherwise even if I hold back 99 % of my strength, you’ll be found in a heap at a hospital tomorrow.”  
Ichigo coughs out, and then glares at the man as he gets up. 

”What? You wanted me ta help ya get stronger.”  
”I suppose I should have expected that.”

The grin on Grimmjow’s face was inching towards maniacal again.  
”Hell yes.” 

Ichigo barely had time to block the second punch, and he began wondering if Grimmjow had agreed to this just so he had permission to kick his ass.   
It didn’t matter right now though; Ichigo had made his bed and was gonna lay in it so to say. 

 

 

The teen wasn’t sure just how long they’d gone at it, but eventually he was on the ground, panting, his entire body hurting like hell. Grimmjow was frustratingly in a good shape still, and paced next to the teen, poking him with his leg with a smirk.

”You dead yet?”

Ichigo grumbles and rolls to the side, turning his back to the man.

”You said you were gonna hold back.” He grumbles accusingly, gaining a snort from Grimmjow who keeps poking him annoyingly with his foot.  
”I did; yer just weak as fuck.”

Ichigo snorts at that, sitting up and shoving Grimmjow’s leg away. The younger male rubs his shoulder that had a nasty bruise on it; the bastard had landed a direct hit on it, nearly dislocating the limb. 

”If this is all you got, I got my work cut out for me.” Grimmjow snorts, although he had to admit, he was kind of impressed already; while the kid lacked tactical thinking and was weaker than him physically, he was surprisingly strong for his frame, and fast. 

In fact, Ichigo’s speed closely matched to his, at least when he held back.   
”Come on; get yer lazy ass up from there, we ain’t done yet.”

Ichigo grumbles, but grabs the offered hand and allows the man to yank him up, before quickly letting go and backing away to a defensive stance, clearly expecting Grimmjow to attack him instantly. 

”It ain’t fun anymore now that you expect it.” The man snorts, amused by Ichigo’s suspicious gaze. 

”You’d still do it; you’re a dick like that.”

As if to prove Ichigo’s point, the man moves and casually kicks him in the crotch, making the teen stumble to the ground with a groan.

”Yeah, you’re probably right.” The man chuckles, then is taken by surprise as Ichigo spins around and kicks his feet, making the man lose his balance. Ichigo jumps forward half a second later to tackle him to the ground, striking the man in the gut with his elbow.

”That’ll be your downfall eventually, being so arrogant.” Ichigo challenges him with a smirk, and gets shoved aside by Grimmjow, who now looked positively annoyed as he scrambles of the ground. 

Damn, the little shit had sharp elbows; that strike hurt like a bitch. 

He was also currently smirking like crazy, clearly proud of himself for that tackle.   
Well, Grimmjow was a professional in wiping smirks like that off people’s faces. 

”Who’s the arrogant one here Kurosaki? I’ve met horny dogs who’re less eager then you.”  
The teen just stares at him baffled, then his face turns into a delighful shade of crimson, and Ichigo aims a punch at Grimmjow’s jaw, which the man dodges by grabbing his wrist and directing the momentum aside, thus making Ichigo stumble forward and right into the lake with a glorious splash. 

”You fucking Dick!” Ichigo grumbles at him, splashing water in Grimmjow’s face as the man laughs at him and his wet-dog appearance.

The man just returns the favor by shoving Ichigo back into the shallow water, making his clothes soak trough completely. The teen eventually manages to drag himself out of the lake, glaring at Grimmjow like he was plotting murder now; his glare could’ve lit entire towns on fire. 

It lit something alright, as the blue haired man just smirks at him even wider, eyes lit with mischief.   
”Thought you needed to cool down.”   
”Hardy har, Jeaqerjaguez.” Ichigo grumbles, walking to the spot he’d left his jacket, scarf and hat. It honestly didn’t help much, but at least warmed him a little bit. Ichigo rubs his hands together, shivering entirely from the cold. The water made the air feel all the more chilly. 

”Giving up already?” Grimmjow taunts him, gaining another one of those amusing glares from the orange haired teen. Before Ichigo could retaliate, the wind picked up, grabbing his hat and blowing it away. Ichigo chases after it as having wet hair with no protection in this weather was uncomfortable, but the piece of clothing decides to land on the middle of the lake. 

Ichigo huffs, stopping on the shore.   
He was not eager on going back in to get it; the damn thing was floating too far away anyway. 

”Yuzu got that for me; she’s gonna be sad to find out I lost it.” Ichigo mumbles and turns to look at Grimmjow, only to find the man standing strangely still, staring ahead at the faraway floating object.

”Grimmjow?” 

Ichigo questions with a confused frown walking towards the man cautiously. This could be another one of his traps for all he knew, but the expression the man had indicated otherwise.  
”Hey, what’s wrong?” Ichigo asks again cautiously, squeezing the man’s shoulder.

Grimmjow doesn’t react, just stares at the hat floating in the middle of the lake. 

 

 

There was blood on the ground, pouring from a headwound.  
It was one of Nel’s friends.

No, not one, both of them.  
They were dead.

The young teen looks around frantic; he couldn’t see her anywhere.  
There were bloody footsteps, leading away from the spot.  
Then, he sees something in the water.

A white hat.

Nel wore a white hat.  
The teen feels cold grip his heart.  
No, it couldn’t be.  
.....  
He jumps in the water.

 

 

”Grimmjow?”

Suddenly, the man lets out a near inhuman growl and grasps Ichigo’s arm, throwing him against the tree with enough force to knock all air out of his lungs.

Ichigo scrambles up, staring at Grimmjow in shock; the man’s eyes were widened like that of a deer caught in headlights, and he was breathing heavily. The blue eyes were unfocused, and Ichigo could tell the man was having some sort of a fit. 

As Ichigo glances towards the lake again, his brain began to slowly connect the dots.  
Something about his hat must’ve reminded Grimmjow of the time Nelliel had been in this very like, drowning. 

The teen stands up slowly, keeping his hands visible; Grimmjow was clearly in an agitated state, and given just the force behind that throw, one wrong move could mean serious pain or even...  
Ichigo shook his head.

No, he should not think that.  
Instead, Ichigo stays still, holding his hands up in a non-threatening gesture.  
”Grimmjow...she’s safe. She’s not here.” He tells the man gently, who just stares at him, as if ready to rip his throat open with his bare hands. 

Ichigo takes a hesitant step forward, but pauses instantly as the man snarls at him like a vicious dog. At that moment, Ichigo regrets ever asking this from him. Sure, coming to the lake was Grimmjow’s idea, but he could’ve told the man that it could be a bad idea. 

”Nelliel is safe; you saved her.” Ichigo reminds the man with a soothing voice, trying to get through to him. After a tense second, Grimmjow’s body relaxed a tiny fraction, allowing Ichigo to walks closer cautiously again. As he did, he kept speaking.

”We’re here because she’s alive; we met thanks to her. She’ll be fine.”  
Grimmjow’s glare intensified again, and Ichigo stops on his tracks, swallowing down almost nervously. 

”They fucked up! She got worse because of their incompetence.” The man growls at him, clenching his fists.

”They did, but now they know how to avoid it. She’ll be safe this time.”  
Grimmjow moves forward suddenly and shoves the teen back against the tree, hand around his throat.

”How the fuck would you know?!” 

He snarls at Ichigo, his entire form shaking from effort to not break his neck. Ichigo grasps the arm holding him, but refuses to show the panic he felt on his face.

This was different from their earlier brawling match; Grimmjow was applying far more strength and an actual killing intent, and Ichigo knew he had to get the man to calm down or this could end badly.

”Because there is no way in hell they’d allow themselves to let you down twice. I won’t let them do it.”

Grimmjow lets out a mad cackle at that, sounding about as unstable as the one he’d given last time they were there.  
”What the hell could you do? You’re just some brat.”   
The man growls at him lowly.

So the belittling of his age was back?  
This had to be bad.

”My family is connected to your case. Therefore I have a lot to say for it.”

”Yeah, just because yer pops was in it years ago, doesn’t mean you get to have a say on it now.”   
The man huffs, but his grip from Ichigo’s throat slackens. The teen grasps the hand and pushes it away from his throat, but doesn’t let go of it, feeling how it was shaking. 

”Take a deep breath.” He instructs the man gently, who for once listens to him and does as requested. Grimmjow places his free hand against the tree trunk beside Ichigo’s head to stabilize himself, as his entire form was shaking now from the sudden agitation. 

”There, just breathe.” Ichigo tells him again softly, almost unconsciously mingling their fingers together. Grimmjow keeps his eyes closed, trying to calm his raging head and push the unpleasant memories aside. 

As his shaking becomes worse however, Ichigo is forced to take in his weight and slump to sit on the ground with the man, who was now leaning his forehead against Ichigo’s shoulder, shaking badly as he held back tears. 

He’d refused to cry about all this for so long.

Ever since he’d met Kurosaki however, it had become harder and harder to hold back.  
The man had no clue why; maybe because the damn teen’s compassion actually meant something to him, no matter how much he brushed it off. 

Cautiously, Ichigo places a hand on his back, just idly stroking it; he knew that the man could push him away at any moment as his pride takes over, but so far Grimmjow was accepting Ichigo’s reassurance. 

It was honestly good for Ichigo as well, as the man was warm, and his body was still shivering from the dump in the lake. They sit there in silence for a while, with Ichigo stroking Grimmjow’s back with his free hand, while the other was still laced together with his. 

Eventually, the man’s shaking calms down, but unlike what Ichigo was expecting, he doesn’t shove the teen away, just shifts to sit further away, gazing at their intermingled hands for a moment with a tired look.

Ichigo doesn’t move, doesn’t try to let go, unsure on what was going on inside Grimmjow’s head now.

”T’was her hat. That’s how I knew she was in there.”  
Grimmjow mutters after a moment, not lifting his gaze as he spoke.  
Ah, that explains why he’d been triggered.

”It was floating on the surface just like that. In almost exact same spot.”  
”Gods, I’m sorry...” Ichigo begins sincerely, but Grimmjow cuts him off with a pointed glare.  
”Not yer fault. You wouldn’t have known that.”  
Yeah, it was true but Ichigo still felt bad.

He was also getting overly conscious about their closeness now, as well as the unpleasant way his clothing stuck onto his skin under the jacket. The way Grimmjow was gazing at their hands however kept him from moving away; the man was clearly lost in thought again, and Ichigo was worried moving away could provoke out a negative reaction.

After a moment, Grimmjow huffs and chuckles a bit, brushing trough his hair.  
”You really piss me off Kurosaki, you know that?”  
Ichigo blinks, and then stares at him irritated.

”Seriously? That’s all you got to say to me now when...”

”You’re makin’ it really hard to hate you.”  
Ichigo blinks, and looks at the man baffled.

Grimmjow brushes trough his hair again, letting go of Ichigo’s hand in the process. He then gets up and paces back towards the lake, hands in his pockets. Concerned, Ichigo gets up as well and follows him.

For a moment, they both just gaze at the scenery quiet, with Ichigo feeling unpleasantly itchy; he’d have to head home soon to change his clothes.

”I don’t want more people in my life to mess things up. Got enough stress as it is.” Grimmjow comments eventually, and Ichigo turns to look at him without a word; he could sense there was more what the man was going to say so he did not nag at him yet.

”Each time I did, they either screw me over, or I get them killed.”

Grimmjow’s voice was quiet, weighed down with years of hardship, and he again looked like he just wanted to fall asleep right there and then, and not wake up. The man wasn’t suicidical, no, but he desperately wanted a break from his life.

”....There was a name in your files?”

Grimmjow shakes his head.  
”Luppi was personal; I lost my shit and he ended up dead because I couldn’t....control it back then.”

Ichigo could hear from his voice that Grimmjow had mixed feelings about this event; he clearly did not like the person one bit, but also clearly hated the fact he’d snapped completely.

”Pierced my arm right through his chest; the bastard was surprised as all hell; died with that dumbfounded look on his face.”

Grimmjow’s tone got a little darker, as well as his smirk, and Ichigo takes a step back involuntarily. Whoever this Luppi had been, Grimmjow clearly despised him with a passion for some reason.  
”No, that shitstain was not the one I was referring to, when I said I get people killed.”  
The man continues after a moment with a sigh, rubbing his eyes.

”...Then who was?”

Grimmjow goes quiet, staring intently at the night sky now. Ichigo begins to wonder if he’ll gain an answer at all. Eventually though, the blue eyes turn to look at him with almost....not downright guilty, but displeased look. Like there was something in his mind Grimmjow didn’t like remembering. 

”Remember those two who kidnapped yer sis?”  
Ichigo frowns a bit, and nods cautiously.  
”Well. There were originally three of ’em; there was this blond guy named Yltford Grantz. He was...let’s just say he had a serious thing for me.”

Oh.  
Ichigo started to see where this was going.

”I didn’t particularly find ’im interesting in that manner. Not my type, but he was really devoted fan, doing all sorts of crazy shit to prove his worth or whatever.”  
Grimmjow averts his gaze, clearly uncomfortable talking about this.  
”You don’t have to...”

”Shut up; there’s a point to this story I’m trying to make.”  
Ichigo closes his mouth and waits for him to continue.

”And yeah, it was kind of flatterin’ an’ all. He was like this loyal puppy, following me everywhere.”  
Ichigo wanted to comment on this, namely because it began to sound like Grimmjow had played with the guy’s feelings, but Ichigo also had a feeling Grimmjow knew this already.  
”I did sleep with ’im a few times; I did make it clear I didn’t take any of it seriously, but he didn’t mind.”

”...He really seemed to love you then, huh?”  
Grimmjow makes a face, and looks away.  
”......I’d call it blind adoration. Tia n’ Nel are in love and neither of them would ever do the kind of bullshit Yltfordt did for me. The kind of humiliating, needlessly dangerous bullshit.”  
”...What did he do then?”

Grimmjow keeps his gaze away from Ichigo, but the teen could tell his expression was dark now. Not in a sinister way though.

”He acted as my personal punching bag if I needed ta blow off steam; the fucker was so much weaker than me, so he was usually at medic bay after that for days. He would’ve let me do anything I wanted.”

”.....That sounds kind of abusive, you know?”  
Grimmjow snorts, his frowning gaze turning to the water now.

”T’was. It’s not like I wanted to be that bad, I just...the shit Aizen’s modifications and drugs did to our brains, the aggression could be incredibly hard to control.”  
Ichigo just nods, having nothing to say to that.

”So...when he got himself killed while trying to defend my honor or whatever, I didn’t care. I’m surprised I didn’t go an’ spit on his grave.”  
For a while, they both are silent.  
”.......Do you regret it now?”

”Nah. What’s done is done.”

Ichigo frowns at that; what was the point of this story then?

”I just don’t wanna be that bastard again.”  
Grimmjow finally admits, looking at Ichigo with a tired look.  
”What do you mean?” The teen asks, confused about his words, let alone the way Grimmjow was looking at him. 

”This is similar. You lettin’ me beat the shit outta you however I want to ’make you stronger’ or whatever.”

Ichigo shakes his head with a frown.

”It’s not the same at all; I am not trying to impress you. I just want to be able to protect those I love better, and I think you can help me with that.”

Grimmjow just keeps looking at him with that unreadable look that began to unnerve the teen. There was something lurking behind those eyes, a new kind of emotion Ichigo had not witnessed from the man before. It reminded Ichigo of the intense desire for blood the man could have in fights once he got serious, but this one was not as cold. 

”Yer reasons don’t matter; it’s what I want that’s the problem.” The man eventually snorts, turning his eyes away again. Ichigo releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding once the blue stare is directed away from him. 

”So what do you want?” 

Grimmjow remains quiet for a long moment, then huffs tiredly, rubbing his eyes.  
”You oughta head home before yer peeps notice you’re gone.”

Ichigo frowns miffed; it was clear Grimmjow was avoiding his question. He did not argue however, given how unpleasant it felt to have his wet clothes stick to his skin like this. He should go home before he caught a cold.

”....If we’re still gonna do this, we probably should meet elsewhere to avoid triggering you.”  
Grimmjow hums and nods. He’d thought he’d be able to deal with it; this place was nicely remote for secret meetings, and wide enough to wipe the floor with Kurosaki. It was clear however, that he was nowhere close ready to deal with his emotions and trauma regarding to this place.  
”I’ll let you know. Try not to die meanwhile.”

”Oh ha ha, aren’t you a comedian.” Ichigo snorts, but then reaches for his shoulder and squeezes it gently with a concerned frown.

”Get home too, and get some rest.” He half recommends, half orders, gaining a predictable snort and a roll of eyes as a reply.

”Yes mother.”

Ichigo couldn’t stop himself from smiling at that remark. 

 

Grimmjow watched the teen leave, feeling conflicted.  
He knew all too well that he shouldn’t have agreed to this; not only did it put him at risk given Aizen was after the family for some reason, but the teen was yanking on his chain the same way Yltfordt used to. 

He was smart, stronger than he seemed while still below Grimmjow’s level, and undeniably attractive. The only difference was the way they handled Grimmjow; Grantz had always been a submissive puppy, doing whatever he told him to, worshipping the ground he walked on basically.  
Ichigo was having none of that. 

He did not bow, did not kiss his ass, but he cared, genuinely, as another human being.   
They both showcased a level of compassion towards him, one had been horribly misguided, other one was something Grimmjow did not deserve. 

That was the problem.

He wanted to accept it, Kurosaki’s compassion and care, but he did not think he deserved it.  
Grimmjow would never admit this out loud, but he was fucking scared he’d just end up hurting Ichigo like he’d hurt Grantz, and it was - strangely enough - the absolute last thing he wanted to do when it came to Kurosaki.

That was why he was so adamant on pushing the boy away earlier.   
He’d refused the care because he didn’t deserve it.   
He still didn’t.

 

Once Ichigo slipped back home, it was five thirty in the morning; given it was the weekend nobody was up yet, so the teen managed to go downstairs and slip his now dirty clothing to the laundry without being noticed, and go back up again, tugging on a nightshirt before he slumped to the bed, exhausted. He glances at the bruise on his shoulder, as well as few other marks on his body from their fight. He could cover most of them, though the one in his shoulder probably would need an excuse.

Honestly, he hadn’t thought of this obvious problem about this thing being kept secret: hiding any injuries could prove difficult. 

Not that it mattered too much, he’d figure something out.  
Despite his exhaustion, Ichigo laid awake, thinking back on the story Grimmjow had told him.  
Ichigo still wasn’t quite sure what the man was getting at with it.

Whatever happened with that Yltfordt, it wasn’t the same case; their motivations were different.

Except... Grimmjow had said it himself; Ichigo’s motivations did not matter, but his.  
What was it then that he wanted?  
Ichigo could not keep up thinking about this for long however as sleep eventually took him over.  
Normally, his family would be bouncing up and waking him up at Seven, but after recent events, they allowed him to sleep late, knowing he hadn’t been sleeping well and needed it.  
So, by the time he scrambled up from the bed, it was twelve past midday.

His sisters greeted him as he walked downstairs yawning; Ichigo still felt tired, but he did not want to sleep any further.

”Orihime stopped by this morning; she wanted to ask how you were doing, but we told her that you were still sleeping.” Karin informs him, giving her brother a scolding look. Ichigo just rubs his head with an awkward smile, muttering out an apology before yawning again. 

”We can inform her that you’re awake.”

”No, no need; if she couldn’t stay and wait, she must’ve been busy.” Ichigo hurries to stop them from calling Inoue; the girl would likely notice his minor injuries and just get worried again. 

Karin lifts eyebrow at that, but then just shrugs and offers Ichigo the sandwich they’d made to wait for him once he woke up.

”Karin-chan had to go to the police this morning again.”

”Why?” Ichigo asks, halfway done eating the sandwich; he hadn’t even noticed how hungry he was earlier.  
”They wanted her to describe all the details of what happened.”

Yuzu looked distraught, and Ichigo did not blame her; the whole thought of what happened to Karin had to be scary to her, and in a twisted way, Ichigo was glad that the one who was kidnapped was the tougher Karin and not her.

Granted, he would’ve preferred it to just be him the most.  
”I told you I’m fine Yuzu!” The black haired girl huffs, although Ichigo could tell the way she was holding onto the table edge tensely; Karin sure as heck didn’t like talking about her ordeal.   
Ichigo didn’t blame her.

”Where’s dad?”

”He’s at Urahara’s; I dunno what’s going on but they seemed to be planning on something.” Karin states with a shrug. The teen frowns a bit, but says nothing to that, glancing outside from the window. He could spot some familiar faces from the street as well as a car parked a bit further away; officers monitoring their home. 

He felt a little bad slipping past them last night as they were there to protect them, but he didn’t have a choice. 

”Hey, what’s that?”

Ichigo freezes, and before he could protest, Yuzu was checking his arm; there was a bruise there Ichigo hadn’t noticed.

”Ah, must’ve hit it while I rolled around the bed asleep.” The teen explains it away quickly, feeling more cautious than he probably should have; that kind of bruise was easy to explain away.  
”Still it looks pretty bad; maybe you should put some ice on it.” Karin comments, examining the darkened mark on Ichigo’s arm as well. 

The teen wanted to groan inwardly; of course these two would make a big deal out of one small bruise. It wasn’t even the worst Grimmjow had inflicted on him; the worst was covered by the long-collared shirt he wore - which neither of his sisters questioned as the air was still chilly anyway.

”Really, I’m fine; do not worry.” Ichigo ruffles both of their heads and finishes his food, before walking back upstairs. He still smelt somewhat like the lake water, so the teen grabs a towel and heads for the shower. He makes sure to take his clothing with him and lock the door to not let his sisters see any of the aftermaths of their first brawl. 

As Ichigo looks at himself from the mirror, he grimaces; aside from his arm and the shoulder, there was still a faint red mark on his neck from when Grimmjow grabbed him.   
Most of the small cuts were already healed, so that was good.

Overall, he was in a better shape than expected, which just showcased how much Grimmjow actually had held back: the teen was fairly certain he’d not walked home by himself had the blue haired man actually used most of his strength. 

With a sigh, Ichigo steps under the warm cascade of water, rubbing the shampoo to his head.   
He still felt tired, having only slept about five or six hours, and given he’d already been suffering from lack of sleep, six hours just wasn’t enough. 

His mind began to drift as the warm water rained over him, and he recalled the last night’s events, namely the story Grimmjow had told him again. 

The more he thought of it, the more Ichigo felt like there had been something hidden behind Grimmjow’s words. 

Something that the teen could not quite believe to be true. 

He brings his hands up, gazing at them for a moment. His gaze then drifts away to check out rest of him again.

Ichigo had always known he wasn’t too bad looks vise, but he’d never really thought about anyone feeling attracted towards him that way. Sure, Inoue had a crush on him, but it was heavily emotion based and came from a bond they already had as childhood friends. 

Not to mention...have somebody of the same sex find him attractive, that was a bizarre thought for Ichigo.   
It did not bother him that much, it was just...bizarre. 

Mainly, because it was seemingly coming from somebody like Grimmjow, who seemed like he’d rather kick him in the nuts - hell, he’d done that. 

Yet, Ichigo could not ignore the tingling sensation in his gut, nor could he forget the strange look Grimmjow had given him. The more Ichigo thought about it, the more obvious it was. 

The teen sighs and turns off the water, stepping out and drying himself; he could not stop glancing into the mirror, suddenly feeling self-conscious about his appearance. 

Suddenly, there’s a knock on the door and Ichigo jumps in surprise.

”Ichi-nii, Ukitake-san called and said he wishes to speak with you!” Yuzu calls out, and Ichigo tells her he’ll be out in a minute.  
As the teen tugs on his clothing, he could not stop but worry that somebody had seen him last night after all, and the man was now going to scold him for it.   
Once Ichigo gets out of shower, Yuzu hands him the phone.

”Hello?”

”Ichigo, how are you today?” The man asks politely as per usual.

”Uh, tired; haven’t slept well for the past few nights.”

”I do not blame you for that. It has been such hectic times for your family.”  
”So uh...why did you call?”

”Oh, nothing specific; I just wished to thank you for making Jeagerjaquez agree to trust us again.”

”So...is Nel alright?”

”Why yes; we in fact picked her up just this morning; she’s right here in fact.”

A second later, a familiar female voice appeared at the other end.

”Ichigo! I’m so happy to hear about you again!” 

The teen could not stop but smile; Nelliel sounded fairly happy at the moment which was a good sign.  
”Hey Nel; I hope you’ve been okay.”

”Yes; Grimmy was a grumpy cat once they came to pick me up, but he was also relatively quiet.” Ichigo could sense the slight worry from her tone, and the teen understood it; it was not like Grimmjow to be ’quiet’ about somebody bringing his sister somewhere without him.

”I suppose he’s just going to miss you.” Ichigo reassures the woman, who sighs sadly.

”Poor Tia; she’ll have to deal with him by herself now.” 

”I have a feeling she’s better at handling him than either of us.”

Nelliel had to laugh at that remark, for Ichigo wasn’t far from the truth. 

”But seriously, are you okay?”

”I told you Ichigo, I am fine; Ukitake-san has been the most pleasant, and so have the others. I cannot say their names unfortunately.”

Ichigo could understand that; mentioning the officers by name could give the people who’d potentially be after her a hint on where she was.

”It’s okay. Just stay safe.”

Nelliel hums and remains quiet for a bit.   
After a moment however, she speaks again, this time with a quiet, softer voice.

”You too Ichigo. I heard what happened.”

The teen reassures the woman yet again that everything would be fine; Ukitake and his team would make sure they all were properly protected this time. 

After exchanging few more words, Ukitake returns to the phone.

”She seemed quite happy to be able to talk to you again.” The man comments with a chuckle.  
”Yeah. I seriously hope that you guys can keep her safe this time, or Grimmjow will literally rip your heads and spines out of your bodies.” 

It was a morbid joke, but not any less true.

”We have taken extra precaution this time. I’ve personally verified each person allowed near her, including her psychiatrist, so do not worry about her or any of us.”   
It all sounded good, but you never knew.

Regardless, there wasn’t much anything he could do about it.

As Ukitake eventually closes the phone, Ichigo releases a deep breath; so far, it did not seem like anybody had noticed him, which was a good sign.

”What did he say?”

”He just thanked me for convincing Grimmjow about taking Nel in for treatment, and I spoke to her as well.”  
Yuzu’s eyes widen, then she smiles brightly, asking him how the woman was doing.  
”She seemed fine to me.” Ichigo states with a slight smile, although he was still concerned. 

 

 

”Come on; that was barely a shove.”

”Shove? You nearly threw me through the fuckin’ wall!” Ichigo complains as he gets up, brushing grass and dirt off from him.

After the initial event in the lake, they’d moved their meeting to another part of this vast greenery area, nearby an old wooden warehouse that was used to shed gardening tools long time ago for the park workers.   
Grimmjow rolls his eyes and spits to the ground.

”You ain’t got time to complain in an actual fight.” 

Ichigo huffs, then quickly blocks a kick aimed at his torso with his leg, using it to leverage Grimmjow further away, before moving forward with another strike that gets blocked predictably. 

They’d been at it for half an hour already and Ichigo still hadn’t managed to get past Grimmjow’s defenses even once. He however, was able to block most of the attacks aimed at him, except when Grimmjow suddenly decides to grasp him instead and throw him at whatever direction he wanted, sending the teen fly in the air like a rag doll. 

Then, the blue haired man aims another painful roundhouse kick at him, and Ichigo desides to use his own tactic against the man; instead of blocking it, Ichigo grasps the limb and uses the ready momentum to throw Grimmjow off balance, sending him stumbling to the ground, before jumping on him and pinning the man on the ground again.

Grimmjow clearly wasn’t impressed by having his own tactic used against him, given by the annoyed expression he wore. 

”What? Since you seem to love throwing me around, I figured I’d return the favor.”

Ichigo smirks down at him, then yelps as Grimmjow strikes a knee at his gut, making the teen slump to the ground beside the man with tears in his eyes. 

Swiftly, the man flips around and pins Ichigo to the ground instead, locking his hands above his head with that same, unimpressed look.

”I suppose I can give you some credit for bein’ able to use yer brain more now. Using your opponent’s strength against them might be the only thing you can do when facing one of us.”

Ichigo yanks at the arm holding his wrists in place, but the grip there was relentless; Grimmjow was clearly adding much more pressure than usual. As he looks up at the man annoyed again, about to demand him to release his grip, Ichigo’s words die in his throat.  
The man was having that look on his face again.   
”Grimmjow?” 

Ichigo asks hesitantly after a moment of silence; it was only probably just few seconds, but it felt like ages. His face was already gaining color, and Ichigo tugs on his arms again, wanting to get free before his face would be as bright as his hair. 

After a moment, the man snorts and gets off Ichigo, wiping his clothes clean from grass and soot.  
”Get up.” He orders simply, and Ichigo pushes himself off the ground, trying to recollect himself after that strange moment between them.

He expected another swift attack, but Grimmjow just examines him with a frown, making the teen shift uneasily. 

”Alright. Here’s what I’ve gathered so far; yer fast, but lack in usin’ your strength properly. A lot goes to waste with those taps-for-punches.”

Ichigo snorts at the man’s choice of words, shifting uneasily under Grimmjow’s glare now. The man was unusually serious.

”You oughta also use that head of yours more than just a pretty decoration, too.”

”I am! I just threw you off-balance with your own tactic!” Ichigo protests irritated, gaining only a snort as a reply from the man, who brushes through his messed up hair. 

Ichigo cursed his heart for fluttering at the sight; Grimmjow was already attractive, and the fact he could amp it up with something as simple as that was frustrating.

Frustrating, because Ichigo now felt the self-consciousness creep back on him, and he checked his clothes with a glance, unable to help himself. 

”Yeah, it’s not like I gave you heavy hints on doing it; I don’t normally throw my opponents around like that. I was just tryin’ to get you to realize in using my strength as an advantage, given you lack with yours.”  
Ichigo bites his lip, unable to come up with a snippy reply. 

”Yeah, normally you just seem to love bashing their heads in.”  
Grimmjow actually smirks at that finally, his expression going a little loopy.

”Yeah. It’s pretty effective.”

Ichigo feels his body tense reflexively, but the man makes no move to charge at him. Instead, he glances aside, listening for something.  
”Looks like we got company.”

Ichigo frowns, his body in high alert; had the officers managed to follow him after all?

Grimmjow just gestures him to follow, and the two sneak away from the area, not really wanting to get caught regardless of who it was.

Eventually the two reach a pathway that was lit, and walk across it in silence. The park was kind of spooky this late at night, and Ichigo looked around almost nervously, waiting for somebody to jump at them or something.

”Relax; even if yer face attracts muggers, they’ll run with their tail between their legs the second they see me.”

Ichigo glares at his companion now irritated.  
”How in the hell does my face attract trouble?”  
Grimmjow smirks a bit at him, before lighting a cigarette for himself. Ichigo had noted that Grimmjow had begun to smoke more now that Nelliel wasn’t around. It was a little worrying as it felt like a stress reaction, but he knew all too well not to bother telling the man to drop it.

He wasn’t going to listen anyway.

”You look like an’ easy target with that overly cutesy babyface.”  
Ichigo huffs, his face turning reddish as he keeps glaring at Grimmjow.  
”You should never judge a book by its cover.” He reminds the man, who just blows some smoke out of his lungs with a thoughtful hum following it.

”I know that. Most muggers probably don’t.”

As if trying to prove his point, a drunken guy suddenly appears and charges at them with a knife. Without thinking, Ichigo grasps the man’s arm and throws him over his shoulder, crashing all of the guy’s weight to the ground.

Grimmjow just blinks, cigarette still on his fingertips as he stares down at the drunkard lying on his feet. For a moment they both just stare as the disoriented man tries to scramble off the ground. 

”Fookin’ hell...wha...the hellwazthat?” The man slurs out, and then as his eyes land on Grimmjow, he lets out a scared yelp and actually scoots to hide behind Ichigo’s legs for some reason.

”What the...?”

”The bastard’s clearly overly drunk.” Grimmjow snorts and walks towards him, making the man scoot back, terror coloring his face in a way that seemed a little unusual. Ichigo steps between them, placing a hand on the man’s chest.

”Don’t. He’s clearly freaked out by you.”

”No shit.” 

The man grunts, glaring down at the drunkard who lets out a tiny ’eep,’ before scooting further back. It was so bizarre, that Ichigo almost wanted to rub his eyes; perhaps he was just seeing things in the late night.

As grimmjow takes another step closer, the man covers his head, speaking really fast. The words were near incoherent slurr due to his drunken state, but Ichigo could still make out the man was begging Grimmjow not to kill him.

”You know this guy?” Ichigo asks, gaining a shake of head, and an amused smirk from the man as he brings the cigarette to his lips again.

”I’m guessing he might’ve been in the audience once.”

Ichigo’s eyes widened as he understood what the man meant. Yeah, if this drunkard had seen any of Grimmjow’s matches, it was no wonder he was scared. Ichigo also did not like the smirk the man was having, and he grabs the man’s arm, gaining his attention.

”This is not amusing in any way.” He tells the man, who just snorts and blows the smoke at Ichigo’s face, making the young man cough. He then turns to look back at the drunkard with a mildly annoyed face. He moves swiftly and grasps the drunkard from his collar, yanking him up from the ground so they were face to face. Ichigo lets out a noise of protest, but Grimmjow ignores him. 

”Listen up here, punk; if you ever again try ta stab Kurosaki, I will fuckin’ gut you.”  
The man growls at the scared one’s face, making him whimper.  
After that, Grimmjow drops the man to the ground, and the guy hurries away with a surprising speed, even if he was lurching from all the alcohol he’d drank.

Grimmjow grunts and kicks the knife the guy left behind away, before turning to look at disapproving Ichigo. 

”That was unnecessary.”

”Blow me.” The man snorts at him, and as expected his choice of words make Ichigo go red again. The teen grumbles under his breath and turns to look away. Why did Grimmjow have to be such an ass at times?  
Well, almost all the time.

Then, as Ichigo looks around more closely, he suddenly realizes they were on a familiar spot; the path at their left led to the cemetery. A familiar feeling of melancholy passes over him, and Ichigo’s anger fades, as he starts pacing towards the place.

”Kurosaki?” Grimmjow calls after him confused, then upon not gaining an answer, follows him with an annoyed sigh. 

They walks amongst the gravestones for a while, until they reach the one Ichigo knew all too well.  
His mother’s grave.

Ichigo gazes at the name on it, feeling the usual sadness hit him, like it often did when he came there. Grimmjow stood beside him now, examining the gravestone quietly. 

”....Yer momma?”

Ichigo just nods, biting his lip. He did not want to start crying in front of Grimmjow right now or preferably ever. While he hadn’t mocked the man for doing it, there was no guarantee Grimmjow would return the favor. 

”.....How was she like?”

Ichigo was taken aback by the question, and after moment of hesitation, he answers with a soft voice.  
”She was...very sweet and friendly. Almost like a star we all orbited around. She never got mad, even if I got into fights or one of us didn’t do our homework. She was...”

Ichigo pauses and closes his eyes, rubbing them. He did not want to cry, he just didn’t.  
”I...was there when she died.”

Grimmjow lifts eyebrow at that. Mercifully, he’s been quiet so far, giving Ichigo courage to continue talking.  
”It was a robbery, or at least I thought so back then. The guy had a gun and was threatening her with it. She covered for me and got shot...”  
Ichigo huffs, turning to look up in the skies.  
He brought his arms around himself, just sort of hugging himself tightly. 

”You thought?”  
Again, just a simple, neutral question.

”Yeah. Ukitake told me it was an assassination. Aizen wanted my ma dead to give dad a warning or something.”

Ichigo dared a glance at Grimmjow, but the man was wearing a stoic mask now, smoking his cigarette. The teen would’ve honestly preferred to have the man say something shitty right now, as at least he knew how to react to that. The strange blankness was unnerving as all hell. 

”.....You really loved your ma huh?”  
”If you’re going to mock me for it...”

”Nah.” The man cuts him off, smoking his cig as he turns his gaze back to the gravestone.

”You know...that shit must’ve happened around the time Nel got cops involved with our situation, cause I remember being at the station when your dad came in, looking distraught as all hell.  
This surprises Ichigo, and he just stares at the blue haired man.

”Wait, you knew my dad beforehand?”  
”Not exactly: yer pops was not the one Tia and I spoke with; it was that white haired guy who kept coughing like crazy.”

Ukitake.

”In fact...”  
Grimmjow turns to look at Ichigo more closely now with a frown, and the boy shifts his weight uneasily.  
”I might’ve caught a glimpse of you as well. I saw some orange haired kid bawling his eyes out before some female cop took him away.”

Ichigo pauses, recalling back on that day. Yeah, he had been brought to the station too, as Isshin had been the one to find them; Masaki had been brought away in an ambulance, while Ichigo went to the station with his dad.

He could not remember seeing a blue haired man - or a teen, given the time frame - back then thought.  
”You were such a crybaby back then.”

There it was.

Ichigo turns to glare at him.

”Yeah, ANYBODY would fucking cry if they saw their own mom murdered right in front of their eyes at that age! Maybe you don’t get it because you clearly weren’t a normal kid, but for MAJORITY of people stuff like that is traumatizing!”

Grimmjow just keeps looking at him with that stoic look, defusing Ichigo’s anger as quickly as it rose. He could not figure out what the man was thinking right now, so he didn’t know how he should react to those words. 

”.....Fuckin’ hell, Tia is right; we are alike.”  
The man finally grunts and rubs his eyes with a tired sigh. Ichigo blinks baffled about his words.

”We’re both suckers at dealing with grief.”  
”What do you mean?”

”You get all defensive over it, tryin’ ta hide it. I hold it back and cover it with aggression. Neither of us is good at dealing with this kind of shit.” Grimmjow explains with a tired, self-decripting chuckle, blowing another wisp of smoke out of his mouth. 

Ichigo remains quiet for a long while, and then a smile creeps on his lips.  
”Yeah, I guess you might be right with that.”

Grimmjow hums, flashing him a smile much more genuine than anything before it. 

 

The two do not spot the pair of eyes watching them from further away, face partially hidden behind a fan.  
”Are you sure about this, Kisuke?”  
The dark haired woman standing beside the man asks, watching the two with a frown.  
”He could try and kill the boy.”

”Do not worry Yoruichi-san, I feel Jeagerjaquez is highly fond of Kurosaki-san, even if he hasn’t admitted it yet.” 

The man pauses, glancing at his companion.

”Plus, this is a good way to test whenever my theory is correct.  
”It’s a gamble, Kisuke. Isshin will not forgive you if Ichigo gets hurt.”  
”It is a risk we have to take if we want to get to the bottom of this.”

The woman hums, her golden eyes watching after the two with a frown, as they exit the cemetery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eight chapter.   
> I will describe their training matches more in detail later on, once it becomes more relevant. Right now the bonding thing is more important, so I put more focus on that part.  
> I think I'll add the effects and stuff on this once the fic is closer to being finished. By effects I mean like cursive text for phone-calls and flashbacks and such.


	9. signs of trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo ends up having a strange fit, and Grimmjow begins to think there's something about this teen that nobody knows about, at least not Ichigo himself.

It was becoming harder and harder to hide his secret training from others as time moved on; during the week he had to hide his progressively worse injuries and bruising, as Grimmjow gradually began to strengthen his attacks. Many nights, Ichigo spent an extra hour up at his room to patch any more serious wounds, and he had to be real careful when sneaking around for the first aid kit to not wake any of his family members.

Ichigo was getting stronger slowly, but it was mildly annoying how he had to hide or explain away the small wounds on his body if one of his friends managed to catch a glimpse of them. 

So far his excuses worked, with Renji especially complaining that he should be taped to the bed or wrapped in bubble-wrap if this kept going. Rukia was clearly suspicious, but chose not to ask him anything for one reason or another.

Inoue was usually the first one to notice the injuries, and Ichigo really felt bad for making her worry. 

 

Ichigo was snapped out from his thoughts by a hard hit to his face, and he stumbles back, realizing he’d dropped his guard momentarily, giving Grimmjow an easy opening to score him.  
”Quit daydreamin’ Kurosaki.” Grimmjow grunts at him once Ichigo recovers from the strike, wiping his now bloody nose. 

He’d been doing well so far, none of the strikes actually landing properly as he’d managed to block all of them, but then his mind had drifted back, making him lose his focus.

”Seriously, the fuck’s wrong with you?”

The blue haired man spits to the ground and frowns at the teen; it was clear Kurosaki was not focusing fully right now, which was bloody dangerous as he could end up accidentally injuring him too badly.   
Grimmjow may have liked good fights, but he was not exactly keen on actually paralyzing or killing Kurosaki.

Ichigo shakes his head, taking a defensive stance.  
After a moment of silence, the man huffs and moves to kick him, expecting Kurosaki to block it, which he naturally does. 

This was their fifth time doing this, which meant a month had passed; Ichigo had in fact gained strength as expected, but Grimmjow could also tell the damn moron was also over-exercising himself, because he would keep going home with worse and worse injuries.

Ichigo liked to blame it on Grimmjow using more power behind his strikes, which was not the whole story. In fact, Grimmjow had barely raised his power level during these past weeks. 

After the blue haired male manages to land another sharp strike to Ichigo’s gut, the teen stumbles back and collapses to the ground, gasping for air.

”Seriously. Yer trying to go ahead too fast.” Grimmjow near growls at him as he walks beside the gasping male, who was trying to regain his breath after the strike had knocked all the air out of his lungs. 

”You...use too much...”

Grimmjow crouches down beside Ichigo and pokes his forehead painfully with his finger.  
”I ain’t. You clearly try ta go beyond your limits; if you keep this up there’s no point in continuing because your body will be too damaged.”

Ichigo glares up at him, and tries to push himself up. However, he almost instantly falls back down, as his head begun to spin. The blue haired man sighs and helps him up, bringing the teen to lean against the nearby tree.

”See what I mean?”

Ichigo grumbles at the man, but he couldn’t deny that he did not feel so good right now; the strike to his face had clearly given him a concussion, and knocking the air out of his lungs hadn’t helped. The frustrating part was that Ichigo was supposed to be able to block a punch like that; he had blocked dozens of them from Grimmjow by now. 

”I just had a bad day today alright? Inoue kept giving me those worried glances and I just couldn’t explain it to her.”

”You can’t let that intervene in battle. You’ll just drop dead.” The older male snorts, lighting a cigarette as it was clear they were gonna have a break now. 

Grimmjow had some minor bruises himself from the times Kurosaki had actually hit him. His strikes were fairly quick and hurt like a bitch when they hit, but due to his faster regeneration rate, his bruising usually vanished by morning. 

The man leans against the tree as well, gazing at the night sky. It was clear tonight with a full moon, illuminating everything with a ghostly, pale light. It was still chilly, but they both were worked up enough by their brawl to not mind the cool wind. 

After a moment, Ichigo’s breathing settles down a bit, and his gaze drifts to the man standing beside him. Grimmjow was only wearing his sleeveless white shirt, having shrugged off the dark blue hoodie he often wore. 

Ichigo was miffed about the knowledge that every single mark he saw on the man’s arms, any bruise would be gone soon. Not because he wanted to harm Grimmjow or anything, but because it just further strengthened the vision that he was beyond Ichigo’s level.

As his gaze drifts up to the man’s face, Ichigo felt his damned heart betray him again; it skipped a beat at the sight and then began to run faster, but not because of adrenaline.

Grimmjow’s features were illuminated by the moonlight now, making his messy hair appear almost like silvery strands touching his face. That accompanied by his stoic expression and cigarette smoke made him appear almost...ethereal, like he wasn’t from this world. 

It made Ichigo’s mood worse for some reason.

It felt like no matter what he did, he could never be on the same level with Grimmjow, never have enough strength to guard his family from monsters of his level. 

The man felt unreachable, in ways that Ichigo couldn’t even name yet.

Not even knowing why he thought so, the teen stands up suddenly, making the man lift eyebrow at him.

”Let’s go again.”

”You almost knocked yourself out from that tiny smack to the face.” Grimmjow points out dully, and then drops his cigarette as Ichigo suddenly grasps his collar, glaring at the man intently.

”Again. Now.”

Grimmjow was taken aback by the sudden intensity in the teen’s gaze and voice, but just nods with an annoyed sigh; if he wanted to get beat up that bad, Grimmjow was happy to help.  
Ichigo takes a stance again, but Grimmjow just keeps his hands in his pockets.

”Go ahead; see if you can deck me given yer wobbly state earlier.”

Ichigo frowns, clearly not liking his dismissive tone. The teen moves and quickly aims a punch at the man, who blocks it with his arm. This is however followed by a swift kick, and Grimmjow shoves Ichigo back to avoid being hit in his side. The orange haired teen won’t let him go far, as he attacks again, this time trying to kick him in the chest. 

The sudden speed and rapid succession of his attacks surprises Grimmjow, given how the teen had been dizzy as all hell just a second ago. They continue this dance of blocking and striking, until Ichigo lets out a frustrated yell and actually smacks him in the jaw, hard. 

The man stumbles back, falling to the ground as his vision blackened a bit.

He was actually bleeding from his head now, and before Grimmjow could get back up from the ground, Ichigo leaps at him and pins him to the ground, eyes burning with intensity he’d not witnessed from the orange haired male before. 

”Stop being so arrogant! You aren’t as strong as you think!”

The teen hisses at him, grasping his collar. Grimmjow stared up at him baffled; Kurosaki should’ve been used to his behavior by now.  
In fact, as he examined the teen’s face more closely, he noted that something felt off. His pupils were strangely sharp, and his entire form was shaking now, almost if Kurosaki was angry for some reason.

”Get off.”  
He tells the teen calmly, who just hisses at him again, like he was some big angry cat.

Grimmjow frowns, then strikes his knee at Ichigo’s gut again, making the teen cough out blood; he’d bitten his tongue apparently, but did not move, stubbornly pinning him to the ground with surprising strength.

”Kid....Get off me.” Grimmjow’s tone was warning now, but Ichigo just hisses at him again, trying to hit him again. The man blocks the punch by grasping Ichigo’s wrist, but he kept his gaze at the teen’s face.  
It actually required some effort now to hold the little shit back, which was unusual.

”Don’t call me a kid! You only do that when you belittle me!” 

Alright, something was wrong; Kurosaki had not really cared for his petty insults this much before, let alone gotten this angry.  
Plus, he seemed really intent on ACTUALLY trying to beat the shit out of him now, in a way that was out of character for the teen whose reasons for fighting tended to be more honorific than his, usually. 

Grimmjow suddenly tugs on the fist he was holding, making Ichigo lose his balance and stumble beside him. The teen lets out a snarl, but before he could do anything, Grimmjow kicks him to the side, hard.

The teen stumbles and rolls back, until he collides with the tree, coughing and gasping for air. 

That kick was MUCH stronger than anything Grimmjow had done so far, making the teen unable to get off the ground as his entire body hurt now. 

He was breathing harshly, clutching his chest and his eyes were wide, almost if he was having a fit of some sort. The man walks closer, then stops as Ichigo suddenly freezes, staring up at him with strangely scared expression.

”Shit, did I break a rib?”

He had not meant to really injure Kurosaki that bad; he just wanted to stun the teen enough to gather his bearings and figure out what was going on.

Ichigo doesn’t respond, just stares up at him from the ground.   
Grimmjow frowns, confused about Ichigo’s behavior; first he was pissy as all hell, now he acted like deer caught in headlights.   
What the fuck was going on?

After a moment, the teen blinks, then closes his eyes and rubs his head, letting out a pained groan. He shifts to his back, taking in a deep breath, before opening his eyes again.  
”Shit, that hurt. I thought you said you weren’t using your full power.”

”What the hell was that Kurosaki?”

Ichigo blinks and looks at him confused. That’s when Grimmjow notices that his eyes looked kind of hazy. The teen attempts to get up, but his body fails him, and he slumps back to the ground with a groan.

”Shit, it really hurts; what did you do?”

Grimmjow just stares at him baffled, and then cautiously walks beside him, crouching next to the teen like before. Ichigo lifts eyebrow at the man’s strange, examining expression. It was making him self-conscious again, and the teen averts his gaze, trying to control the heat creeping up his face.

”....I told you to get off, but you didn’t, so I kicked you.”

Ichigo turns his gaze back at Grimmjow with a confused look.

 

”Wha..? I never got up, what are you...?” The teen frowns, and then hisses in pain. His side hurt really badly, like somebody had stabbed him there, even though he could not feel any blood pouring from it.

Grimmjow just stares at him quiet for a while, and then places a hand on Ichigo’s forehead, making the teen look up at him again. For a moment, the man holds eye-contact with Ichigo, clearly searching for something. The teen keeps looking back, despite the nervousness creeping up on him. 

Eventually, the man sighs and moves his hand away, brushing through his hair with it.

”....Um.”

Ichigo begins after a moment of silence, and the blue eyes look back at him, fastening Ichigo’s heartbeat almost involuntarily. This time was worse, because he could see a hint of concern in the man’s eyes, something he had not aimed at Ichigo ever before. 

”I guess we’re done for tonight?”

Grimmjow nods almost instantly, face still in a deep frown. He helps Ichigo up, who held his side as it hurt pretty badly. There were no signs of blood on his shirt, and the kid breathed normally, so it did not seem like his lung had been busted or anything. 

”Shit...walkin’ home’s gonna take a while...” Ichigo mumbles, rubbing his eyes. He felt strangely dazed, and had to lean against Grimmjow heavily for support.

”....I better drop you off.”

Ichigo looks up, surprised about the man’s words. Grimmjow just snorts, giving him an annoyed glare.  
”You’re gonna be mugged or fall into some ditch somewhere and drown if I let you wall all the way home by yourself in that state.”

”Whoa...you actually give a damn afterall about me.” Ichigo comments with an amused smile, which instantly gains him payback as Grimmjow pokes him into his injured side, making Ichigo flinch and cry out in protest. 

”You said we were done!” 

”Shut your fucking mouth Kurosaki.”  
The man grunts at him with unusual seriousness, and nearly drags the confused and dizzy teenager to his bike. Ichigo keeps staring at him through the strange mist that surrounded his vision, wondering why the man was suddenly so tense again. 

”Yer sitting in the front this time, because I doubt you can hold onto me otherwise.”  
Ichigo felt his face gain color, but upon seeing the glare aimed at him, his protest died down in his throat. Why was Grimmjow suddenly being like this?

Regardless, he does as the man says, sitting in front of him, trying his hardest to ignore the warmth pressing against his back, as well as the breathing brushing over his shoulder.

”You can’t drive all the way to our house; it would probably alert the officers nearby, and they’d come ask questions which I doubt you want.”

Grimmjow huffs; he had a feeling the officers knew damn well what Ichigo was up to. Why they hadn’t done anything about it was the question.

The man starts driving, and Ichigo is glad he’s secured between the strong arms, as Grimmjow clearly did not know the concept of safe driving. He was always too fast and reckless, making the teen want to pee his pants a little. 

Eventually, they arrive nearby the Kurosaki clinic, and Grimmjow stops his bike.

However, for Ichigo’s surprise, the man doesn’t leave as he sneaks to his yard and climbs in through the window he’d left open; Grimmjow in fact follows him, that same frown on his face.

”What?”

Ichigo asks once he manages to sit on his bed, holding his head; he felt weird right now; kind of light-headed. Grimmjow glances around his room a bit, hands in his pockets, and Ichigo realizes this was the first time the man was up there. He was currently looking at the old family photo on the wall that had their mum Masaki in it.

”I suppose that explains it.”  
The man mutters with a slight amused smile, though he did not seem to intent his words for Ichigo. The teen replies anyway.

”The hair?”  
”Nah.” 

Grimmjow turns to look at Ichigo with a slight mischievous smirk. 

He doesn’t explain himself however, and instead moves closer, lifting Ichigo’s shirt up - making the teen protest naturally - to check in case there was a nastier wound. All he saw was just a serious bruise, which was both a relief but also a little surprising, given the force he’d used.

”Back off will you?!” Ichigo grumbles, pushing the older male away and tugging his shirt back down with a flushed face. Grimmjow flashes another smirk at him, but it dies pretty quickly, as he slips to sit down on Ichigo’s bed as well, and keeps checking on all of Ichigo’s injuries, ignoring the blood on his face he had from the hit the teen had given him. 

His unusually gentle and caring attention clearly flustered the teen, but Ichigo did not try to stop the man from doing it. 

Then, Ichigo finally seems to notice the dried blood on Grimmjow’s face, and his slender fingers reach up to touch the streaks with widened eyes.

”I didn’t even...when the hell did this happen?”

Grimmjow blinks, turning his attention to Ichigo’s face.  
He really didn’t remember?

The teen brushes his hair aside a bit to take a closer look.

”You must’ve hit your head to some sharp rock or something, given there’s a small gash here. It’s not too bad luckily, few stitches should be enough. The fact it’s already stopped bleeding a while back is a good sign too.” Ichigo examines the wound, speaking as if on automatic: being the son of a doctor, he had the habit of analyzing people’s injuries and figuring out what kind of treatment they needed. It was a reflex of some sort.

Grimmjow doesn’t say anything, just examines Ichigo’s face, noting that the strange haze seemed to have cleared now. Upon not gaining any sort of reply, Ichigo looks back at Grimmjow, then quickly backs away, realizing how close they were of one another. He rubs his neck, feeling awkward now.

”Uh, sorry. It’s a habit.”

The man snorts and gets up finally satisfied that the teen was in a tolerable condition.   
”Worry more about yer nose; it looks kinda crooked now from here.”

Ichigo instantly reaches to touch his nose, remembering that yeah, Grimmjow had hit him in the face. It still felt sore, but strangely enough, not as painful as Ichigo would’ve expected.

”At least ’ts not bleeding anymore.” The man mutters out, gaining a glance from Ichigo which Grimmjow just ignores, walking back towards the window.

”You oughta rest better if you wanna keep doing this; today’s show was pathetic.” Grimmjow smirks at him over his shoulder, before turning away.  
The teen did not see the slight frown Grimmjow had on his face as he left so Ichigo just glares after the man as he leaves, and then slumps down to his bed, taking a mental inventory on what happened.

There was still some strange fuzziness in his head; not just that, there was a hole in his memory. Perhaps that kick from Grimmjow had been too hard and knocked him out for a bit, causing this blackout?

Yet...there was something strange about Grimmjow’s behavior once he’d come back to his senses. Ichigo was fairly sure he had done that wound on Grimmjow, but he couldn’t remember how, or when.   
In fact, this whole training session was a bit of a blur in his head right now.

Ichigo manages to push himself up and close the window, before grabbing his pajamas from the closet. Despite the aching, Ichigo concluded he did not need any first aid right now, given he had no bleeding wounds as his nose had stopped. 

He still sneaks to the bathroom to wash his face from the small bits of dried blood. 

”Ichi-nii?”

The teen almost jumps, and glances behind him, finding sleepy Yuzu on the bathroom doorway, rubbing her eyes.

”Oh, uh...sorry, did I wake you?”  
”Are you okay?”

”Yeah, I just...couldn’t sleep very well as usual, figured washing my face could help.” He reassures the girl, who yawns and then walks in to give him a hug.  
”It’s okay Ichi-nii; dad’s police friends will keep us safe.”  
Ichigo could not stop but smile a bit, and he hugs the girl back, petting her hair. 

”Go back to sleep Yuzu before Karin wakes up and worries.” He instructs her gently, and the girl nods with another yawn, grasping the glass of water she came to take, before heading back to bed. Ichigo walks into his room too, closing the door behind him and leaning against it momentarily with a sigh. 

He slumps to his bed, tugging the covers over himself and gazes at the ceiling.

As exhaustion begins to take over again, his mind drifts involuntarily at the moment Grimmjow had actually checked him over. It was not something the man usually did.  
Mostly, once they were done, Ichigo was left to fend for himself, which meant he’d scramble back home by himself and patch anything that needed it. Grimmjow had never come with him to make sure he’d be alright, not before this.

Ichigo could not stop his cheeks from gaining color as he thought about the warm, gentle touch of Grimmjow’s fingers brushing over him, making sure none of his injuries required excessive medical attention. 

It was such a dramatic shift from his usual, overly violent dickwad behavior that it baffled Ichigo to no end. Something must’ve happened during that time his mind had gone blank. 

However.... he felt too tired to think about it, and before he noticed it, the teen had fallen asleep.

He dreamt of red, crimson color engulfing his entire vision, with just a flicker of blue and silver in the midst of it. 

 

”Are you alright Ichigo? You’ve been awfully tired today, more than usual.” Rukia question from the teen, which was currently resting his head against his arms, folded over the cafeteria table they were currently sitting in. Rukia had invited him to join her and Orihime for a cup of coffee.

Ichigo had woken up feeling incredibly drained today, and what’s worse, he still could not remember clearly what had occured last night. He could remember some bits and pieces about the fight with Grimmjow, then the moment the man had predictably decked him again, then...everything was fuzzy after that. 

He could’ve sworn Grimmjow had actually brought him home and even checked his injuries. It sounded so ludicruous that it had to have been a dream.   
”Ichigo?” Rukia questions again, and the teen lifts his head, rubbing his hair with a sheepish laugh.  
”Sorry, not feeling too good today.”

”Are you perhaps getting sick, Kurosaki-kun?” Orihime asks concerned; Ichigo had never really been sick before, so seeing him like this was worrying. Ichigo just shrugs, unsure on how to answer to that. Maybe he was having flu or something for the first time in his life; it could explain the dizzy spells and his strange inability to focus properly on anything.

Rukia brongs her hand to Ichigo’s forehead with a frown.

”Your temperature seems normal though. I’m guessing it’s the lack of sleep.”  
”Yeah, I’ve still had trouble with it.”

”It’s been a month since, Ichigo.” The black haired girl points out, clearly suspicious of Ichigo’s state. She did not buy the explanation that he was still affected by the kidnapping attempt.   
”Yeah, well....” Ichigo cuts himself off with a yawn, and rubs his eyes. Man he felt so tired.  
The two girls glance at each other, having a wordless conversation.

”...You should go back home Ichigo. Get more rest. But if this doesn’t stop, you need to go see a doctor. An actual doctor, not your dad.”

”My dad is an actual doc.”

”Someone who is not biased.” Rukia looks at him pointedly, and Ichigo rolls his eyes: hell, if anything, an outsider doctor would be much less overprotective over him than Isshin would.

Still, he agreed with the girl’s estimation; he desperately needed rest for some reason.  
As the two girls watch Ichigo walk away, they look at each other concerned.

”This is not normal; he’s so tired constantly now...” Rukia mutters, holding her chin.

”There’s....he’s always injured too...”

Rukia looks at Orihime surprised; then again, Inoue was more likely to notice this kind of things when it came to Ichigo. This increased the girl’s worry, and she looks at the direction Ichigo had gone.

”He better not be up for something reckless again.” The short woman comments with a frown, wishing she could ask more from her brother; Rukia’s gut instinct told her that her brother’s case he was investigating alongside others was connected to Ichigo’s bizarre behavior. 

”We might be just overworrying too; what happened with Karin had to be traumatizing. Ichigo has always put so much effort in caring and protecting his family ever since Masaki san passed away.”  
Rukia had to admit that Inoue might have a point. 

The trauma would perhaps explain his quietness and exhaustion.  
Not the injuries Inoue had mentioned. 

Still, if Ichigo was not willing to speak about it, they could not really force him. The woman sighs, and stirs her tea with a thoughtful frown. 

 

As Inoue makes her way home later in the day, she could not stop thinking about the past month; Ichigo had been very closed off from them, often sleepy or otherwise distracted. He barely came to spend time with them during weekends.

He also had those mysterious injuries, the kind he never spoke of for some reason, always brushing them off if somebody asked about them. It was worrying.

Especially the one she’d seen on his neck that one time; a red mark that looked like somebody had tried to choke him. Inoue worried so much, but she didn’t know how to ask about it.

Once the girl reaches her house, she freezes in place.

Someone was waiting for her, leaning against the door with a cigarette on his lips.

It was Grimmjow. His head was covered with the hood of his white jacket, and the usually sleeked back blue hair was a mess, like he’d just woken up. 

She had not seen the man since the park incident, and he still sent a chill down her spine with his mere presence. The woman swallowed down her fear and walked calmly towards the door.

Surely, if he was capable of caring for somebody like Nel, the man would not hurt her.

..... Right?

Orihime stops, few feet away from her door. She would be unable to enter until the man moved away; the fact he stood between her and potential safety meant that the man wanted something from her. After taking in a deep, shaky breath, she looks up at him.

”Why are you here, Grimmjow-san?”

She asks politely, figuring it was the best option. Not that he was the kind of man for formal titles, but she’d always been taught to be polite.

The blue eyes focus on her, making the girl take a small step back, fidgeting nervously. The man takes the cigarette off his lips, dropping it to the ground and stepping on it, turning it off.  
”I need ta talk to you. It’s about Kurosaki.”

His words surprise her, not just their meaning but the tone behind them; Grimmjow sounded a bit concerned, and the frown on his face added to it.

”Wh...why? Did something happen?”

The man snorts, the mildly annoyed tone making the girl back away a bit again. 

”Sort of. I just figured you’d be the most likely to answer my questions, given how most others of his pals seem to think I’m some sort of brainless warmonger.”

The thought seemed to amuse the man, as a dark grin appears to his face for a second, but it is soon replaced by the previous frown.

”Uhm...it depends what you wish to ask. There are some things even I won’t know.” Inoue mumbles out, holding her hands in front of her in a slight defensive posture. The man lifts eyebrow at that, then huffs out a sigh, shaking his head.

”Relax. I just really gotta figure out few things right now.”

Inoue nods, but doesn’t relax her posture. She was unable to, for his aura was too oppressing for her, even if he did not mean to do so.

”What do you wish to ask?” She manages to mumble out, her voice quieter and shakier than she intended. The man seems a little irritated by it, but leaves it be for now: he understood why she was scared.  
”It’s gonna sound strange, but this might be important; has he ever been sick?”  
That was a strange question indeed, and Orihime blinks, then hurries to answer, not wanting to upset the man,

”Not really no...right now he seems kind of sickly, but it might just be lack of sleep.”  
The man hums, his frown deepening.

”He’s been in fights before, right?”

”Yes?” 

Orihime did not understand why the man was asking such questions.  
”.... How fast does the fucker usually heal?”

Orihime blinks again; why was Grimmjow asking these kinds of things?  
”If you are planning on fighting him...”

”Answer the question woman!” The man snaps at her, and Inoue flinches, backing away again.  
”H-he...rather quickly I suppose? H-he was able to... to remove the cast from the shot leg in just few days.”  
Grimmjow shakes his head and looks away, muttering something under his breath. His face was still in a frown, and it looked like he’d come to a conclusion he wasn’t happy about.

”He’s never had temper problems has he?”

”Not exactly, if by temper you mean the k-kind you have...”

Grimmjow’s eyes snap back at her, and Inoue bites her lip to not make an ’eep’ sound. He was staring at her so intently that she worried she’d combust into flames.

”So he’s never freaked out during a fight before, as in, gone overboard?”

”N-not exactly I’d say, why?”

Grimmjos shakes his head again and rubs his eyes, cursing now more openly. He paces around a bit, clearly agitated by something. She could also hear him mutter something by himself, but it was so quiet the girl couldn’t make out the words. 

”Is something wrong?” She dares to ask after a moment, and the man whips around, staring at her again.  
”Wrong? Hell, if what I think is true, Kurosaki’s in deep shit. I just don’t get how the hell that would be possible!”

Orihime’s eyes widen, and she looks at him with a questioning look, too scared to voice it out.  
Grimmjow stares at her for a moment, as if contemplating if he should tell her what he was thinking. Before he could say anything however, Orihime’s phone rings, and she digs it out from her bag, nearly dropping it out of nervousness, before finally answering.

”Rukia-chan, what is it?” 

”Ichigo was in a fight; we’re currently at the clinic.”

Inoue’s eyes widen; Ichigo was often in fights, but the fact Rukia informed her about it like this, something had to be badly wrong.

”What the hell is it?”   
The man demands from her, and Inoue almost jumps, having forgotten Grimmjow was there.

”Kurosaki-kun was in a fight...”  
”Is somebody there with you Orihime?” Rukia asks at the other end, hearing the second voice.  
”Ah, Grimmjow-san is here with me.”

She could hear Rukia pause for a moment, clearly surprised by her reply.  
”What does he want?” She asks, sounding serious and concerned the same time. 

”He was asking me about Ichigo...”

”Why?” Rukia demands, not liking what Inoue was telling her.   
Before the girl could reply, Grimmjow huffs and snatches the phone from her hand.

”The hell was he in a fight? Why’s that such a big deal?”

Rukia goes quiet as she hears the man’s voice from the other end, taken aback by the sudden development in the situation.

”He’s been acting strangely aggressive, that’s why. How does that belong to--”  
Grimmjow did not bother replying; he throws the phone back to Orihime and heads for his bike parked nearby.

”What’s going on there, Inoue?” Rukia asks, worried for her safety.

Inoue doesn’t reply, just holds her phone and stares at the man confused. Why did Grimmjow look like he just received some seriously bad news?

”Don’t just fuckin’ stand there; come on!” The man growls at her, and Inoue realizes abrutply the man was offering her a ride. It was a scary thought, but Rukia had sounded concerned, and the Kurosaki clinic was quite a few blocks away.

”I’ll be right there Rukia-chan.” She finally tells her friend, before closing her phone and walking to the man. After a moment of hesitation, she sits behind him, and the man starts driving. 

Inoue learns soon, what Ichigo knew already; Grimmjow was a reckless driver, and Inoue feared for her life as they passed by cars ridiculously close. She just hoped she wouldn’t throw up on the way, the man would not like it for sure, and she didn’t want to piss him off.

Inoue tried to focus on the situation at hand for now, hoping that Ichigo would be okay.  
Whatever was going on had to be unusual given how concerned Rukia had sounded. Then again, Orihime wasn’t surprised, she’d had a feeling something strange was going on with Ichigo for a while now. 

Perhaps they’d finally find out what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...deciding how fast should I pace this thing was hard.  
> The next chapter will partially happen around the same time as the end of this one, namely in the space between Inoue chatting with Rukia and going home, finding lost angry kitty from her door.   
> ...Well not lost, but definitely kind of pissy as it's like Grimmjow's default mode after being a dick xD


	10. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo learns the truth about himself.  
> Grimmjow saw it coming.  
> Also, dream-panthers. really big ones

It had been strange, and in the end, terrifying.  
Ichigo had been walking home from the cafeteria, when it happened.

He’d just crossed the street when he’d ran into some familiar faces; Yokochini and his goons, a group of people who’d been known to cause trouble in this area.  
They had the habit to pick on people weaker than them a lot, and in the past Ichigo had been a target as well, at least up until he’d finally decided to kick the damn weasel’s ass. 

Now, it seemed that the brunet asshole had some business with him, as the group quickly surrounds Ichigo, who looks at the man dully.

”What do you want now?”  
”I heard you were causing some shit to my friend over here the other night a while back.” Yokochini nods at one of his goons, and Ichigo realizes soon that it was the same, drunken man from few weeks ago, who’d tried to rob Ichigo with a knife, only to be scared shitless by Ichigo’s blue haired companion.   
Ichigo looks up at the leader with an annoyed twitch of eye.

”He tried to poke me with a knife. All I did was to stop him.”  
”Yeah? Then why did he come back to us, whining like a crybaby? It’s bad for business to have one of my guys act like a wimp!” 

Ichigo releases a sigh and rubs his eyes. He really did not have the interest or patience to deal with this kind of bullshit right now.

”For the record, he peed his pants because of the guy who was with me; I had nothing to do with it.”  
”Yeah, well you were there still, so you’re responsible!” The weasel hisses at him, gaining an utterly unimpressed look from Ichigo. 

After what he’d witnessed from Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez, nothing this guy said or did really even caused a ripple in Ichigo’s mind.

”It’s not my fault if Grimmjow’s nicest behavior spooks your little buddies that bad.” Ichigo comments with a snort, rubbing his head irritated. 

His ’whatever’ attitude seemed to really piss the guy off, as the next thing Ichigo knows, is Yokochini punching him in the face with an irritated snarl.   
Ichigo stumbles back, seeing stars; the hit was nowhere even close to the strikes Grimmjow would give, but since he was already kind of dazed, it hurt pretty badly.

”Why you little...”

Before Yokochini could land another punch on Ichigo, the orange haired teen grasps his fist and strikes his knee in the guy’s gut, making him cough and drop to the ground as all air gets knocked out of his lungs.   
Ichigo then spins around, still holding the guy’s wrist, and throws him against his buds with a fierce yell. The two he hits stumble to the ground in a heap with their boss, while the rest stare at Ichigo surprised; they had seen him bear Yokochini before, but Ichigo hadn’t been this strong then.

The teen looks at his hands, realizing it himself, and an involuntarily smirk creeps up on his face, as adrenaline kicks in. 

”What the heck happened to you?”  
Yokochini asks as he scrambles up, clearly stunned just how much stronger Ichigo was now. 

His nose was bleeding and the man wipes the stuff off his face, smearing his cheek in the process. It made him look pathetic, whereas Grimmjow would’ve looked intimidating.  
Tiny part of Ichigo wondered why he was comparing everything to Grimmjow now, but that train of thought quickly dissipated due to irrelevance.  
”You’ve just gotten weaker.” Ichigo mocks the guy, who predictably gets irritated.  
”Let’s kick his ass!” One from the group yells, and predictably, others join in, charging at Ichigo all at once. The teen cracks his neck, and kicks the nearest guy in the gut, stopping another one’s punch with his hand and punching the attacker in the face.

It felt laughably easy, fighting against these thugs after the hard matches he’d been having with Grimmjow. Ichigo found himself thrilled at the prospect; he had gotten stronger after all.

One of the guys swings a pipe at Ichigo, but the teen grasps it, yanking it off the guy’s hand and whacking him with it, so hard the guy’s head splits open, spilling blood on Ichigo’s clothes.  
Normally, at this point the teen would stop, knowing that things were getting out of hand, but this time, he couldn’t.

Almost manical grin appears in his face, as he begins beating the thugs with the pipe, who start to turn into defensive mode, noticing that he was getting overly aggressive.   
”What’s the matter, I thought you were tougher than this?”   
Ichigo taunts the group, grinning like a maniac now.

Something weird was happening.

His vision was getting kind of blurry in the edges, and reddish. 

Blood was pumping fast in his veins, and Ichigo had never felt this thrilled in his entire life.  
He swings the pipe again, smacking the nearest guy in the face, making him cough out blood.

Another one tries to grab the pipe, but Ichigo shoves him aside, kicking the man hard in the gut, before smacking him with the bloodied pipe as well.

All the voices around him felt kind of distant, all he could focus on was the rush of adrenaline in his blood.  
He wanted more of it. 

A strange sound appears out of nowhere, Ichigo was nor sure what it was.

Another one of the thugs falls to the ground, bleeding. The rest were now backing away, but he follows them.

Laugh.  
He was laughing.  
It was an unfamiliar sound, almost a maniac cackle.

Ichigo reaches Yokochini who’d tried to flee, grasps his collar and throws the man on the ground, raising the pipe to strike the bastard’s skull open. The man whimpers and covers his head.  
Then, an arm grabs the pipe forcing it off his hands.

Ichigo snarls and attempts to smack the person who intervened, but the big guy just grasps his fist, calling out his name and telling him to stop.  
The haze begins to clear slowly in his head.  
The voice was familiar, the face too.

A dark skin, bangs over the eyes….

Chad?  
”Chad?”

 

Ichigo asks dumbfounded, as his mind clears completely. The aforementioned large teen was still holding his fist, standing between him and covering Yokochini, who looked like he’d been peeing in his pants just now.

”Ichigo, stop, what are you doing?”

The teen glances at the other male with Chad - Renji, it was Renji - who stared at him in shock.  
Ichigo blinks, shaking his head, then as he looks around, his eyes widen in horror.  
Most of the guys were lying on the ground, bloody. 

Their injuries...they were far worse than what Ichigo initially thought. They were worse than what he’d usually inflict on a brawl like this. Then, as he glances at himself, the teen realizes he was covered in blood too now. It was all over his face and hair, and clothes.

Ichigo raises his hand, not believing what he saw.

As this realization begins to dawn on him slowly however, the teen begins to shake uncontrollably, not even knowing why.  
”Chad...Renji...” he whimpers out, looking up at his friends with a panicked look.  
”Ichigo?”

The teen slumps to the ground suddenly, unable to stand as his legs shook so badly. Chad supports his friend with concerned look in his eyes, and he looks up at Renji, who looks at Ichigo and the devastation in front of them in shock.

”...I’ll call an ambulance for these guys. Bring Ichigo home.”  
Chad just nods, and lifts the badly trembling teen into his lap, carrying him away from the scene.  
Ichigo just stares at his bloodied hands, not understanding what just happened.

His heart was still racing in his chest. 

 

 

Once they arrived to the Kurosaki clinic, Orihime felt extremely dizzy, having to take support from the man to stay upright. For her surprise, he doesn’t protest, just waits till she was stable enough.  
Orihime hurries to the door, and is about to reach for the door, when Rukia pops out, blinking and then breathing a sigh of relief once she sees her friend. 

However, her smile dies down as she spots Grimmjow walking towards them, hands in his pockets.  
”Why are you here?” She demands, but the man ignores her glare and just pushes past the two girls, heading to the clinic part he knew the teen would be in. 

Sure enough, Ichigo was sitting on a bed, his face still in light shock. Most of the blood had been cleaned away, but he was trembling badly. Around him were two of his friends - the mexican guy and the redhead - as well as his dad, sisters and the hat guy. There was also one of the officers usually monitoring the house, the female one with orange hair and obnoxiously big breast size.

”Grimmjow san, what a surprise.”   
Urahara comments upon seeing him. 

The man ignores the surprised looks aimed at him and just walks to trembling Ichigo, stopping in front of him hands still in his pockets. After a moment, the teen raises his wide brown eyes to look at him, and it was the same deer in headlights look again. 

”Grimmjow...”  
”The hell did you do?”  
Renji was about to grab the blue haired bastard and demand to know why he was there, when the two girls stop him, looking at Ichigo and the man with a frown.  
”I...don’t know. I just...”  
”He was...beating up this group that used to bother him a while back. I’ve never seen Ichigo use that much unnecessary force.” Chad explains, gaining a glance from the blue haired man, who soon directs his attention back to Ichigo.

The teen’s face was a mixture of confusion, shame, and terror. Grimmjow did not blame him for that.

”Why are you here anyway?” Renji finally demands from the man, not understanding why the hell he was there.  
Grimmjow ignores the redhead, and turns his glare at Isshin and Urahara. 

”You two. You got some shit to explain.”

Ichigo blinks, and glances at his father and Urahara, both whom suddenly looked uncomfortable.  
He then freezes as the blue haired man suddenly grasps his hair, holding onto it firmly.

”Now why the FUCK is this random kid having Trance-like symptoms?”

Most of the people in the room did not understand what the man was referring to, but both Urahara and Isshin look at each other again, knowing the situation was bad. Ichigo looks up at Grimmjow as well, but the blue eyes stay firmly locked on the two adults.

”Well...” Urahara begins, clearly contemplating how to proceed with the situation.

Grimmjow lets go of Ichigo’s hair, marching to the hat wearing man and grabbing his collar with a low growl. The female cop grasps the handle of her gun, but Isshin holds his hand up, telling her to stand down for now.

”Don’t. Fuck around, Bastard. If Kurosaki’s got it too, he’s in deep shit! Explain this, now!”  
Ichigo could’ve sworn the usually calm - if eccentric - man actually turned several shades paler, and he coughs, politely requesting Grimmjow to put him back down, as the man had actually pulled him off the floor. Grimmjow releases his grip with a grunt, walking back beside Ichigo, crossing his arms with an expectant frown.

”What is going on dad?” Karin asks, clearly a little unnerved by the blue haired male and his aggressive behavior. Yuzu was currently hiding behind her, trembling in slight fear.   
Isshin releases a slow sigh and rubs his eyes.

”I suppose we got no choice. I never thought Ichigo would actually have it, he’d shown no signs...”  
”Sometimes, the meta-human genetics activate at a later age; not all test-subjects of Aizen gained their power as quickly as Grimmjow-san.”

Ichigo blinks, looking between Grimmjow and Urahara, utterly confused.  
”What is the meaning of this?” Rukia demands with a frown, not understanding what was going on either. She wasn’t the only one, as most in the room did not understand anything about what Grimmjow, Isshin and Urahara were talking about.

After a moment of silence, the blond haired man sighs. 

”I was hoping we’d never have to do this, but it seems we have no choice now.”

”Get on with it; if this really is what I think it is, Kurosaki’s gotta learn to cap it before he kills himself or somebody else.” Grimmjow near growls at the man, the sound so close to animalistic that one could imagine being an actual panther. 

Urahara nods, and then turns to look at the female cop, who still kept her eyes on Grimmjow.  
”Could you please inform Ukitake-san about the turn of events? I am afraid we’ll have to have a very specific talk with Ichigo now - and his friends too I recon.”  
The woman still looks at Grimmjow with a frown, but then nods and pulls out her phone.

 

Ichigo was sitting on their living room now, a blanket over his shoulders.   
Grimmjow stood beside him, leaning his arm over the backrest of the sofa Ichigo sat on.  
It almost felt like he was guarding Ichigo, though why exactly, the teen had no idea. It was... strangely comforting to have the man around him for some reason, perhaps because he seemed to understand just what the hell had happened to him. 

Orihime and Rukia sat on the larger couch, watching Ichigo concerned. Chad and Renji stood on the side, both of their faces in a frown. 

Yuzu and Karin were upstairs with the female officer - Rangiku - as Urahara had decided it was for the best if the girls did not hear about this. It was better not to involve them into this situation. 

Isshin was also standing nearby Ichigo, arms crossed. He kept glancing at Grimmjow, unsure on how to feel about the fact just how close the man was of his son, let alone the fact Ichigo seemed okay with it, even leaning towards him subconsciously.

Urahara sat down on the last chair, folding his fan with a sigh. The curtains were closed, and the atmosphere on the room was tense; whatever was about to be revealed, was big.

”Your father and I always hoped we wouldn’t have to do this. However, we cannot keep this a secret from you no longer, not anymore given what just happened.”

”....Are they okay? Yokochini and his group I mean?” Ichigo asks hesitantly, and Urahara nods with a light smile.  
”Good to see you’re still yourself, kurosaki-san.”  
The teen sighs relieved, closing his eyes for a moment. He’d been so terrified after what he’d done that they’d died; the weasel was a jerk, but did not deserve it.

”Get on with it old man; is Kurosaki a meta-human like me, or what the hell is going on here?” Grimmjow grunts, gaining disapproving glances from Rukia and Renji, but he ignores them.  
Urahara did not seem to be bothered by his crudeness one bit, as he just hums with that same smile on his face.

”Indeed. Kurosaki is, at least partially, like you, Jeagerjaquez san.”

Ichigo looks up at Grimmjow, who frowns, glancing down at him.

They hold eye contact for a moment, before Grimmjow turns his attention back to Urahara, allowing the teen to breathe again, as his gaze still tended to make Ichigo forget how to do it momentarily.

”How the hell? Was he adopted then?”

”No. You see...his mother was in fact one of Aizen’s original test-subjects.”

Grimmjow lifts eyebrow at that, and there is a collective gasp in the room. Inoue covers her mouth, looking at Ichigo in shock. The teen’s eyes widen too, and he looks at Isshin as if expecting confirmation. The old man sighs and nods.

”It’s true. That’s how we actually met; I saved her from Aizen’s clutches.”  
Ichigo blinks, slowly turning his attention back to Urahara as the man continues speaking again.  
”Yes. She was one of the first attempts to test his superhuman formula. We found out about his illegal activities thanks to her in fact.”

”So...what does this mean for Ichigo?” Rukia questions the two men with a concerned frown on her face. None of this sounded good in her ears.

”Yer saying Kurosaki inherited that shit from his momma?” Grimmjow beats Urahara to it, and the man nods, seemingly not surprised that the male was able to connect the dots so quickly.

Grimmjow frowns, looking down at Ichigo, who looked up at him again.  
He looked like a spooked puppy right now, eyes wide and clutching the blanket around himself tightly.

Ichigo’s friends could not stop noting these strange glances, indicating a connection they had not known of. Nobody questions it for the time being however.

”....so that’s why Aizen wanted your sister; he thinks you three got the same stuff in your veins as I do.”

”Correct: I believe the potential inherited superhuman genes interest him greatly.”

”So Yuzu- and Karin-chan might have it too?”   
Inoue asks from Urahara, who hums again and looks at Grimmjow.

”I believe you’ve seen the development stage more closely than any of us, what do you think?”  
Grimmjow frowns a bit, kind of surprised the man wanted to hear his thoughts.

”Grimmjow?” 

The unusually quiet, uneasy voice from Ichigo made the man look at him again, and it was clear the bastard was worried for his two sisters.  
The man almost wanted to snort, noting the completely non-hostile tone of his thoughts when using the insult to describe Kurosaki. It had become an endearment almost, when it happened he had no fucking clue, nor did Grimmjow care really. 

”....It’s possible. The reason most of us activated the shit so quickly was because we were trained from the start. I suppose our training triggered it fer him.”

His words cause a bit of a commotion, and Renji glares at the man again, asking what the hell that meant. Rukia was also demanding an answer, but neither of the two spoke, just looked at each other again, almost if having a silent conversation. 

”....So this wouldn’t have happened if I never asked you to do it.” Ichigo mutters out after a moment, his face in a desperate frown, and voice shaky.

Grimmjow snorts, still looking at him.

”Don’t give me that shit; I should’ve never agreed on it. Then again, this was gonna happen sooner or later.”  
The group watches the bizarre exchange between the two; for a moment it felt like they’d forgotten there were others in the room.

As Urahara coughs however, the two turn their attention back to the group.   
”Indeed. We allowed you two to continue doing it, because I wanted to see whenever Kurosaki-san had in fact inherited the genes from his mother. I trusted that you would not actually injure him greatly.”  
Grimmjow snorts at that.

”And I thought I was crazy.”

Yeah, it sounded like a wild bet to trust Ichigo’s life in his hands, but Grimmjow had in fact done exactly as Urahara suspected he would; not truly harm Ichigo. Why, it was still bit of a mystery given the man’s background, but the reasons did not matter.   
”You did prove my suspicion correct, but I did not expect him to also suffer from Trance. I believed it was not something one could inherit, especially given how his mother’s version was submissive and not dominant like yours, Grimmjow-san.”

Grimmjow says nothing to that; he did not understand much about the dominant-submissive differences, other than those whose version of the meta-human genetics was the latter, they were calmer and less likely to have violent fits like Grimmjow.

”...Um....what is this trance you talk about?”  
Inoue questions after a moment of silence.  
Urahara looks at Grimmjow again, clearly expecting the man to explain it. The blue haired male rubs his eyes, and then brushes through his hair with a sigh.

”Basically, what this orange haired shit did just now.” He pokes Ichigo’s head, making the teen flinch, though not out of pain.

”It’s a state where one can get extremely aggressive and violent, to the point they might not recognize friend from foe. I suffer from this shit, but unlike Kurosaki, I’ve dealt with it for years so I can control it.”

Inoue’s eyes widen, and she looks at Ichigo with extreme worry. The teen avoids her gaze, gazing at the floor instead. He did not want Inoue to see his fear, for it would just make things worse.  
”Indeed. Ichigo doesn’t have much experience in reining it in; hence this violent fit was likely triggered.”  
For a moment the room is silent. 

Then, Orihime breaks it again.  
”What should we do now?”

Urahara sighs and looks up at Isshin, who rubs his eyes. This was a bad situation.

”Aizen will hear about this somehow I’m sure. He’ll try to get his hands on Ichigo now that his suspicion is proven correct.” The old man begins, looking at Ichigo with an apologetic and concerned look.  
”Yes, I believe so. We may have to bring your son to somewhere safer for now, until we come up with a plan.” Urahara comments, examining Ichigo closely. 

”You can’t just bring him to god knows where by himself! If that shit Chad and I saw happens again...” Renji doesn’t finish his sentence, just looks at his friend with a worried look, which looked extra concerned due to his excessive eyebrows.

”We are not going to send him off by himself naturally.” Urahara reassures the red haired man.  
”He’ll need a therapist or so.” Rukia concludes, but Urahara shakes his head.

”As of now, a therapist will not suffice; we are not dealing with a trauma here, but a reaction caused by the chemistry in his body. While technically speaking, they can be seen as a same thing, I believe rather than doing psychological research into Ichigo’s psyche, he needs somebody who can teach him how to maintain this new side of his before we can speak of psychology.”

That is when all eyes land on Grimmjow, who’d near dozed off during Urahara’s answer. Once he hears his name mention however, the man snaps out of it, and looks at them with lift eyebrow.

”What?”

Urahara gets up, and walks towards them, stopping at the other side of the armchair Ichigo sat on, looking at Grimmjow seriously.

”Kurosaki-san needs your help. You are the only living meta-human of Aizen’s project – as far as we know - that hasn’t died from Trance’s side effects.”

The blue haired man snorts, straightening his posture and crossing his arms. He was glaring at the man now, clearly having a thing or two to say about that proposition. 

What he said however, was not what anybody expected, for most thought he’d refuse right off the bat.

”There’s no guarantee I can help. It depends so much on each individual. Aaroniero dropped dead out of a heart attack during one Trance despite having all of those so-called sedatives to keep calm. The weird fanatic bastard Zommari went and shot himself ’cause he went overboard with his mind-over-matter bullshit. Thought he was some higher being or so because of metahuman genes and bulletproof because of it.”

Urahara just nods, looking down at Ichigo, who curiously was looking at Grimmjow this whole time with wide eyes. The boy was clearly listening closely to what the man said, as well as being genuinely surprised that Grimmjow seemed concerned over him.

”And what is your estimate of Kurosaki-san’s survival rate?”  
The blue eyes drift back at Ichigo, who looks back at him with a nervous gaze. He was clearly afraid to hear Grimmjow’s answer. 

”....honestly, I have no fucking clue. His case is different from most given it activated so late, and it’s not direct but inherited. For all I know he’ll either be fine, or drop dead the next day.”  
Yeah, that was not reassuring, but Grimmjow had to be honest. 

Bullshitting Kurosaki did nobody any favors. 

”...Very well. I’d still like you to try. I doubt it will do him any harm.”  
Grimmjow huffs and rubs his eyes; he was not happy about the turn of events, but he’d clearly gone too far to back down. 

”I can try. But if the bastard drops dead, it’s not on me.”  
Urahara smiles a bit.  
”Naturally, Jeagerjaquez san.” 

 

Ichigo was sitting on his room right now, surrounded by his friends. They were all quiet, not really knowing how to process all of this. 

Grimmjow was still downstairs, apparently discussing some things through with Urahara and the police.  
Ichigo was still kind of surprised the man was willing to help him this much. Sure, he’d agreed on training him, but it still felt strange. 

”That was a lot to take in.” Rukia breaks the silence eventually, gaining agreeing nods from everybody. She then turns to look at Ichigo, who sighs, knowing what she wanted to ask.

”I asked if he could train me, get stronger in case I’d have to deal with meta-humans like him in the future. I did it so I could protect Karin and Yuzu better.”

His answer did not seem to surprise anybody.

”That was stupid; the guy could’ve killed you! I don’t get much what was said or is going on, but that whole meta-human business sounds bad.” Renji states, crossing his arms and glaring at Ichigo like he wanted to smack his friend for his reckless and stupid decision; it would not be the first time. 

”Well he didn’t. I know you don’t exactly have a good image of him, but Grimmjow can be decent if he wants to.” Ichigo defends the man, feeling the need to clear the air about this now.   
He had to admit, the fact his friends did not truly know the man like he did, bothered the teen.   
They saw him as some sort of dangerous, violent jerk, but Ichigo knew there was more to it than that.

”...He did seem very worried when he came to ask me about your health.”

Ichigo lifts eyebrow, looking at Orihime, who proceeds to explain what happened before she arrived there. Ichigo’s eyes widen, and he could tell how Orihime shook lightly as she described the conversation. Grimmjow could be terrifying, even if he didn’t mean to. 

”....It sounds like he was already suspecting what Urahara confirmed to us, then.” Rukia concludes from the tale, and Ichigo nods, frowning a bit.

He thought back on their match last night, and began to realize that perhaps that blank spot in his memory had been some sort of ’trance-fit’ or whatever it was called.

Ichigo closes his eyes, trying to recall what had happened.

Before he can however, the door on his room opens, and Grimmjow steps in.   
He ignores the hostile gazes from Rukia and Renji, and just gestures behind him.

”Get out. I gotta talk with Kurosaki.”

”And why can’t we remain here as well?” Rukia demands from the man, but Ichigo hushes her, requesting all of his friends softly to leave.

”It’s okay.” He reassures them, and after a moment of hesitation, the group gets up and leaves the two alone. Ichigo remains sitting on his bed, unsure on what the man wanted.  
Once the door closes behind them, Grimmjow walks to him and slumps at the feet end of the bed with a sigh, leaning against the wall beside the window.

”You sure arranged me into some deep shit.”  
”You said you did not have to agree on helping me.”  
Grimmjow grunts and turns his head to look at him annoyed.

”Now I gotta call Gin and inform him I ain’t gonna be around for a while, and that’s a pain in the ass.”

Ichigo frowns, not recognizing the name.  
”The silver haired guy who upkeeps that arena.”  
Ichigo could barely recall seeing the man. 

Which reminds him...

”Why were you there?”

”Money. Harribel was tight on cash, given her flat for one became an apartment for three plus a cat.”

”Was that really all?”

Grimmjow turns his gaze away, looking reluctant to answer. 

”....I began doing it to help my Trances pass. Because of stress they’d gotten worse, and I was fucking scared I’d freak out in front of Nel.” The man finally admits reluctantly, rubbing his eyes. 

That made sense; Ichigo could recall how scared Nel sounded when she spoke about Grimmjow being angry.   
”....Are you sure you can do this then? If they've gotten worse...”

Grimmjow snorts and looks at him again, this time with a lazy smirk that made Ichigo’s heart skip a beat again.

”Beating your sorry ass helped a lot too. Don’t worry about me; I’ve dealt with this for years.”  
Ichigo frowns at his comment a little, but he was secretly glad to hear that.

The teen then abruptly realizes that Grimmjow did not turn his gaze away, and there was again that strange layer to it Ichigo did not understand.

The teen shifts back a bit, feeling nervous under that stare.  
”You gotta stop being so obvious.” The man suddenly remarks with a smirk, and Ichigo looks at him confused.

”You might as well hold a sign over yer head that says ’a virgin.”

Ichigo blinks, then just stares at the grinning bastard for a long time, before his face goes bright red, and he near yells at Grimmjow’s face.

”That has nothing to do with anything!”

The man just laughs at him, his grin so wide it would rival that of a Cheshire cat. Ichigo shoves him lightly, grumbling under his breath, which only edged the man further, making his snickering worse. After a moment of fuming and complaining at Grimmjow however, Ichigo feels his body relax from the tense state it had been in.

He hadn’t seen Grimmjow laugh like this ever before; it was free and relaxed, not a maniacal cackle or a bitter one. He sounded almost genuinely happy for once.

Eventually, the man settles down and brushes his hair, taking in a deep breath to stop his chuckling. Gods, he looked so good when he smiled, in a genuine manner, and Ichigo felt his heartbeat again go erratic against his will.

”You should smile like that more, it looks good on you.” Ichigo blurts out involuntarily, and mentally slaps himself as the man turns to look at him with lift eyebrow.  
Ichigo coughs and rubs his head, turning his gaze aside.

”I mean...”

”For fuck’s sake Kurosaki. Stop making this hard for me.” The man groans all of a sudden, rubbing his eyes now seemingly irritated. Ichigo stares at him baffled, but the man refuses to explain and just jumps off his bed, the frown now back on his face.

”You might wanna start packing; they wanna move you as soon as possible.” 

Before Ichigo could say anything, the man headed out of the door almost too quickly, leaving the teen watch after him baffled. He slowly realizes that he had no idea what the man had actually wanted to talk to him about; their whole conversation had mainly been about him answering Ichigo’s questions.

It seemed that the man had had second thoughts, and decided to not say what he was going to.  
Ichigo sighs and gazes out from his window, wondering what Grimmjow had wanted to say.

 

Grimmjow had not been kidding; there was a car ready for him and Grimmjow already that evening, heading to a place unknown for Ichigo. He’d told his friends goodbye, who’d all been told that they would not know where he was heading, nor would they be allowed to contact him until the potential danger was over.

Honestly, Ichigo felt the police were being paranoid, as after the kidnapping incident, nothing had happened for over a month. Still, you could never be too sure about anything.  
Grimmjow was currently on the phone with somebody, and Ichigo could tell from his expression it was Nel.

The man had a level of softness to his expression he never showcased to anybody else.  
Out of curiosity, Ichigo eavesdrops on what they were talking about.

”Yeah yeah, I’ll be careful. Trust me; I was pretty fucking surprised to find this out myself.”  
The man pauses, listening to Nelliel’s reply.

”the cat’s staying with Tia, it’ll keep her company till this fucking mess is over.”

Again, another pause, and the man snorts, as if something Nelliel said felt stupid to him.  
”It’s more likely Kurosaki kills himself before I do any proper damage; he tries too hard.”  
So they were talking about him now?

For a moment Grimmjow remains silent, and then he releases a slow sigh, rubbing his eyes again. He’d been doing that a lot recently. It seemed to have become a compulsory habit he did when something irritated him.  
”Yeah. I do. That’s the problem, sis. I probably shouldn’t.”

His voice was quiet now, soft almost, and Ichigo could not really figure out what he was referring to now. That tone was something Grimmjow mainly used about Nel, but since he was speaking with her, it wasn’t likely to be the topic.

”Easy for you to say. You ain’t got a temper so bad it makes hell look like North Pole.”  
A hint of a smile danced on his lips after a moment, and Ichigo guessed that Nel had perhaps laughed at that remark or so. 

That’s when Grimmjow notices Ichigo looking at him. The teen quickly turns his gaze away, feeling like he was caught red handed. The man frowns, and then exchanges few more words with Nelliel, before closing the phone and handing it back to Rangiku, who was looking between the two young men curiously now. 

She’d noticed the way they looked at each other, and could sense with her woman’s instinct that something was going on between them that neither seemed to realize yet.

She doesn’t comment on it however, just smiles knowingly as the blue haired male stuffs his hands in his pockets and walks to Ichigo, saying something that makes the teen snap at him again with a flushed face, although there is still a hint of a smile on Ichigo’s face.

The only people Rangiku had seen act like that were youngsters who had a crush towards the person teasing them.

”I don’t know what to think about that to be honest.”

Isshin comments, having walked beside Rangiku, who laughs a bit and winks at him.

”It’s always nerve-wrecking, seeing your child in love.”  
Isshin hums and crosses his arms. 

”You don’t seem as worried as one would expect.” Rangiku notes as they watch the car drive away. The man remains quiet for a moment, and then sighs with a slight smile.

”That man has a lot in common with Ichigo. I would be surprised if they didn’t feel any pull towards one another.”

”Still, given Jeagerjaquez’ past, you are awfully calm.” The woman observes, curious about this detail. Isshin turns to look at her with a slight smile.

”Ichigo’s a smart kid; he would never get involved with somebody who wasn’t worth it. Let alone fall for them.”

”I think that is what most parents think about their kids.”

Isshin laughs at that, admitting the woman was probably right.

Still, the man believed in his words with all his heart. When he looked at the blue haired youngster, he’d never seen the vicious monster Aizen had tried to create. Back when he’d been in the station for the first time – they’d never conversed directly, but he’d been there – Isshin had found it hard to believe the boy was the infamous sixth Espada. He was strong, aggressive, but also very clearly protective over his sister and friend Harribel, in a way Ichigo would’ve been.

No, Isshin did not see a ruthless killer on that day; he’d seen a kid - a kid lot like Ichigo - who ended up in a bad situation and made mistakes, a kid who just needed proper guidance, and somebody to care for him for a change.

Somebody like Ichigo, it turned out.  
No, he was not worried about Grimmjow.   
Aizen was the threat they’d have to focus on. 

 

The drive to their destination was quiet. 

The officer driving was Shuuhei, Ichigo had spoken with the man before. Grimmjow was either asleep on the back seat or focused hard on ignoring them, keeping his eyes closed.

”Are you sure about this?” The officer questions, glancing at the blue eyed man at the back. The teen - who was sitting on the passenger seat - sighs and shakes his head, but not to indicate uncertainty.

”He is not that bad once you get to know him.”

Shuuhei seemed skeptical, which was understandable; he’d probably red the case files on the man. He could not understand why anybody would trust Jeagerjaquez with Ichigo’s life, let alone dealing with his new....developments.

Sure, they had undercover officers nearby the place for security, but mainly Kurosaki would be by himself with Grimmjow, a man Shuuhei knew as somebody prone to violence.

”Honestly. He even held back during our fights just enough so I would not end up dead or injured so bad I’d need to go to the hospital.”

”Well wasn’t that nice of him.”

Ichigo frowns, not liking the sarcastic tone the man had.  
”Really. He’s not that bad - I mean he did kick me in the crotch once - but most of the time he acts decent towards me, in his own way.”

Shuuhei looks at him pointedly.  
”He kicked you in the nuts and you call him decent?”

There’s an audible chuckle on the backseat, indicating the man was awake and listening to them. 

Ichigo glances back, giving Grimmjow a pointed glare, but the man just flashes him a lazy smirk, before turning his attention back out of the window. As Ichigo leans back to his seat, Shuuhei could not stop noticing the way the teen was smiling.

Just what the hell was going on between these two?

 

The house they were brought was in the woods, nearby a small village. It looked like any old cabin on the outside, but Ichigo could bet on it that it was highly secure on the inside.  
”The officer responsible for watching after you will stop by shortly. His name is Hirako Shinji by the way.” Shuuhei pauses, and then makes a face.

”He’s a weird dude, just warning you.”   
Ichigo blinks confused, grasping the bag Shuuhei handed for him. 

Grimmjow was looking around boredly, not having much stuff with him; he was used to surviving with as little as possible. The two enter the house, and Ichigo notes that it only had one bedroom.   
”One of you has to take the couch I am afraid.” Shuuhei comments upon noticing the same detail. Ichigo bites his lip, wondering if he should volunteer, but Grimmjow just snort and slumps to the said couch, lying down and crossing his arms behind his head, closing his eyes.  
Shuuhei blinks, and then looks at Ichigo.

”I guess that’s decided then.”

Ichigo goes to put his stuff away, wondering how long he’d have to stay there. He also could not stop but wonder how living with Grimmjow would work out. Dealing with him on small dozes was easy, but 24/7 could prove problematic. 

Plus...he was not sure how exactly the man planned to help him deal with his potential seizures or whatever the hell they were, nor if he’d end up having them again. So far it seemed that what triggered those was a fight, something Ichigo did not see himself having, unless they continued their training routine.

”Well, that’s about it then. There should be enough food here for couple of weeks, and you can ask Shinji to bring you more. Just be careful what you ask for.”

Ichigo was now utterly curious on what kind of person this Shinji was.

Grimmjow ignores Shuuhei’s words completely, just turning to his side, back turned towards them. The officer huffs and shakes his head, clearly not impressed by the man’s dismissive attitude. Ichigo just rolls his eyes, used to Grimmjow’s disregard of authority by now.   
He was like a stubborn kid when it came to that. 

Once Shuuhei tells them goodbye and leaves, Ichigo starts examining the place, noting that while it only had one bedroom, there were two bathrooms. It sounded like a good thing; Ichigo was not keen on sharing it with the blue haired bastard.

The teen pauses as he takes a second look at his thoughts, and could not stop but smile a bit. Even that insulting word had turned into a form of endearment in his head now. Ichigo did not know when it happened, but it had. 

Once he comes back from putting his stuff to the bedroom, he finds Grimmjow digging out a whiskey bottle from the cabinet, as well as a pack of cigarettes. Whoever prepared the place, knew the man was a heavy smoker. 

”Well this is going to be...interesting.” Ichigo comments after a moment of awkward silence, suddenly not knowing how to deal with the man. He’d never had to spend so much time with him before. Grimmjow snorts, pouring himself a glass, and then grasping a soda from the fridge, throwing it to Ichigo.

”What, I don’t get to drink?” Ichigo asks with a lift eyebrow.

”Not with that baby-face no.” The man comments with a poker-face, but there was a hint of his usual teasing in his eyes, and Ichigo gives him a half-hearted glare, before popping his soda-can open.

Grimmjow slumps to sit by the table with his drink, and after a moment Ichigo follows suit, sitting down to the chair on the other side of the table. 

They both remain quiet, and Ichigo takes the opportunity to examine his companion again. If Grimmjow was aware of it, for once he said nothing and let Ichigo do it in silence, just smoking his cigarette while he gazed out from the window.

The teen still could not quite get over just how blue his eyes were.   
Was it some sort of side-effect of his meta-human genes?   
Maybe the haircolor was too?

Hell, perhaps his own obnoxious orange was just the result of his own hidden metahuman genes, it was possible. 

A weird thought crossed his mind as he kept examining the man; they were sort of opposites, yet the same, and this included their appearance. Grimmjow’s haircolor was opposite of his, cold versus warm, same with their eyes. He was strong framed, more of a muscular type, whereas Ichigo admittedly had leaner, perhaps even a slightly feminine form, not that he’d ever admit it out loud. Right now, Ichigo wore a black hoodie and dark blue pants whereas Grimmjow had a white shirt and hoodie on that he kept open. 

Yet, they both had a spiky hair, both wore a hoodie, and they both had kind of sharp eyes.   
It was...bizarre; almost like looking at a negative of yourself; familiar and alien the same time.

”If you keep staring like that, I’m gonna think you’ve gone brain-dead.” Grimmjow suddenly comments, turning to look at him with a slight smirk.

Ichigo huffs and rolls his eyes, drinking his soda that had gone a little warm now.

”I just noted how our colors are kind of opposite right now.”  
”That’s a weird fucking thing to ponder about, Kurosaki.”  
”I know.” Ichigo hums with a soft smile, gazing at his soda.  
”They kind of...fit together I think.”

Grimmjow says nothing to that, just gets up suddenly and informs him he was gonna check the surroundings. Ichigo watches after the man with lift eyebrow, but doesn’t try to stop him.   
He had noticed the slight shift on Grimmjow’s expression however, before the man left.  
He seemed bothered by what Ichigo had said for some reason.

 

 

That night, the teen doesn’t sleep well again.  
He’s seeing the same dream.   
Dream about red all around him. 

Only this time it is not a vague sensation; he’s drowning on it, raining down all over him from the darkened abyss that he was at the bottom of.

Ichigo could hear mad cackling - his own distorted voice - echo from invisible walls, getting louder and louder until his head rang like somebody had placed a giant church bell beside his head. 

”Make it stop!”

Ichigo yells at the abyss, holding his ears as it hurt to listen to that sound.  
His heartbeat was quick, to the point Ichigo feared it would leap out of his chest.

”Stop!” 

 

He screams again, trying to claw the sound away from his head. Drops of blood ran down his fingers as his nails burrowed into his skin, leaving trails to his face and neck.  
It hurt so much, but he wanted it to stop.

As the deafening noise continues, Ichigo soon realizes it was not the abyss laughing, but he himself. He was the one cackling madly, holding a bloodied pipe with bodies in front of him.

It felt good to fight, to spill blood.

No, that was not him!

Shut up, you enjoy it.

It’s not true!

...........

Wait, who was he arguing with?

......

 

Suddenly, another voice breaks through the chaos, and a brilliant blue light spreads all across the place, forcing the shadows and voices to retreat.

Next thing he knew, a giant, glowing white panther stood in front of him.  
Ichigo stares up at it with widened eyes, but he was not afraid of it.

Instead, he reaches for the giant beast, feeling like he was fighting back against invisible vines.  
Something was trying to prevent him from reaching the feline.  
Ichigo tried to speak, ask for help, but his voice died in his throat.

Then, the panther opens its jaws and lets out an incredibly loud growl, the mere pressure of its voice forcing whatever was holding Ichigo to back away. The teen stumbles forward, until he reaches the giant beast, and buries himself against its white fur, trembling with tears.

 

”Settle down Kurosaki.”

The teen gasps for air, as he suddenly realizes he was awake.

Moreso, he was crying, currently clutching firmly onto Grimmjow, who was actually holding him gently, a hand brushing his hair.

It took Ichigo a while to regain control over his breath, but he did not move away from the warm hold even when he finally did. It felt shamefully good to rest against the taller man, feel his fingers comb trough the orange locks.

It was nighttime, and it seemed that Ichigo had been trashing in his sleep, prompting Grimmjow to come and check on him. It was...weird to have him be gentle like this, but Ichigo indulged in it for as long as it would last.

This was how he usually treated Nelliel, so it wasn’t too surprising the man was capable of it.   
It was just surprising for him to do it for somebody else than her.

”It’s alright. This shit tends to happen after the first times.”

Ichigo lets out a questioning hum.

”When you get your first Trance-fits, yer brain tends to mess with you and cause nightmares. Granted, mine did not make me weep like a baby.” 

Ichigo could almost feel Grimmjow smirk - his face was very close to his skin after all - and the teen snorts, but he wasn’t angry at all. He just held onto Grimmjow, reluctant to let go of the comforting warmth. 

”.....There was a panther.”  
”What?”

Ichigo bites his lip, and then continues, sensing Grimmjow was wondering what the hell he was talking about.

”In the dream. It saved me.”

Grimmjow hums at that, but says nothing. His fingers kept rubbing Ichigo’s scalp, making the teen sleepy. For a guy as rough as Grimmjow, his touch could be real gentle if he wanted it to be.  
Ichigo lets out a yawn, as his eyes begin to slip closed.

”I think it was you.” He lets out, before falling asleep again.

Grimmjow eventually puts him back down, covering Ichigo with a blanket, before heading out of the room, getting himself another glass of whiskey.   
Ichigo’s last words before falling asleep kept replaying themselves in his head now, further confirming what he’d been dreading for a while now, ever since he’d first agreed to help the teen train. 

Kurosaki had grown attached to him, and Grimmjow had no fucking clue what to do with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tenth chapter. yippie.  
> Enter Shinji the next chapter.   
> I have no bleeping clue how to write his character, so I apologize in advance if it's gonna be weird. Weird in a wrong way.  
> ..............  
> This apology is effective pretty quickly given I've already written the next chapter in fact.   
> Also, I mentioned this before, but I will be adjusting the chapters later on, adding effects and fixing any typos once this fic is closer to completion. Right now I just want the story out there as I have time and inspiration to write it.


	11. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo meets the officer responsible for them for the first time - he's weird, but nice  
> Ichigo also ends up having another fit, this one fueled by fear rather than aggression.  
> Grimmjow shows that despite his own belief, he can actually be pretty darn gentle if he wants to.  
> Also there's a panther, because of course there is. Ichigo's brain is weird.

It turned out, that Shuuhei’s warning was not for nothing; Hirako Shinji was indeed a weird one.  
Their first meeting consisted of the man stumbling to the ground face-first, rolling around and holding a hand up in the air for shaking without bothering to get up.

”Hey, name’s Shinji. You oughta be Ichi given that blindingly orange hairdo.”  
Ichigo blinks awkwardly, and shakes the offered hand.  
He then helps the man up, who casually brushes his clothes.

”You got food here? I’m hungry.” The man states walking straight inside from the open door, leaving baffled Ichigo watch after him. 

Grimmjow was sitting on the window frame, watching the bizarre exchange with a cigarette on his lips. He could already tell this blonde nuisance would be annoying as all hell to deal with.

Shinji walks straight to the fridge and grabs himself one of those obnoxiously sweet sodas, then swings around to look at the blue haired man, who just glances at him.

”You must be the ”crotch-kicking angry freak” Shuuhei told me about.”

Ichigo coughs, biting his lip not to laugh at that description.

”I’d prefer you not to kick me too; I heard it hurts pretty badly.”

Grimmjow keeps his face perfectly stoic, blowing some smoke out before he replies.  
”Won’t make promises. Though I’m more likely to kick you in that annoying face of yours.”

Hirako looks at him with a perfectly calm face, making Ichigo wonder if he was just naturally fearless like that, or didn’t take the threat seriously. Most other officers Ichigo knew would have, given how they reacted to Grimmjow normally from what Ichigo had seen. 

”Aww, so crotch-kicks are only for Ichi? I feel left out.”

The teen splutters out, feeling his face heat up as he notices the light, mischievous grin appearing on Grimmjow’s face for a split-second, and he stares at the weird officer with baffled look. What the hell was this guy?

Why the hell was he being so friendly, calling Ichigo ’Ichi’ like his sisters did anyway?  
”So Shuuhei told me the whole deal. That’s some rough stuff for a teenager.” Shinji comments calmly and he sits down to the table, drinking his soda and then spitting it out.

”Gross, this stuff is so sweet!”

”Then why did you take it?” Ichigo questions, to which the man shrugs... and drinks the stuff he called gross anyway.

Ichigo rubs his head, not knowing how to deal with this guy.

”Anyway. I’m supposed to make sure you got everything you need here, as well as make sure none of Aizen’s goons slip by - minus the grumpycat on your windowsill of course. To my understanding he got permission to be there.”

Shinji looks at Ichigo, as if to confirm this, and the teen nods, glancing at Grimmjow who’d chosen to completely ignore Shinji’s presence for now. Perhaps it was a good thing, Hirako seemed like the kind of guy who could really piss Grimmjow off, and fight was the last thing they needed.

”I would’ve selected a less scratchy pet, but each to their own I suppose.”

Ichigo just gives the man awkward smile, really not knowing what to say to that. Grimmjow snorts, but keeps his gaze to the window stubbornly.  
”He’s actually here to, uh, help me, with my problem...”

”Oh yeah, the crazy stuff that makes you beat up people with pipes? I have heard fighting fire with fire can work, but dunno if this is a good case for it.”

Ichigo sighs and rubs his eyes, getting himself a glass of juice, before sitting down to the table with Shinji. The man drinks his soda, and spits it out again, complaining how gross it was. Ichigo wondered if he really was that much of aloof like his dad, or just pretended as some sort of distraction tactic. 

”So? How’s that going?”

”We arrived here just yesterday; I haven’t really had any...fits yet, so...” Ichigo shrugs, unsure on how they were actually going to deal with this. Shinji hums, rubbing his head and mumbling something incoherent under his breath. He then glances at the soda can, staring at it intently for a moment.

”This stuff’s great.”

He says abruptly, and Ichigo blinks, confused.

”Didn’t you just say that it was gross?”  
”I did? Well, I changed my mind.”  
This guy was so weird.

 

Shinji stuck around for a while, and despite the initial weird awkwardness, Ichigo began to connect with the guy and chat with him; the officer naturally asked him about the events that had transpired before leading to this point, but he was also curious about Ichigo’s family in general, having only met Isshin once. 

”Huh, and I thought I was the weird one.”

Ichigo smiles awkwardly at that; he’d just told Shinji about the way his father often woke him up - by jumping in his room, screaming ’good morning Ichigo’ at the top of his lungs and falling out of the window if it was open. 

Granted, the old man had not done it that much recently, probably because of the whole mess that was going on. 

”Yeah, well, dad has always been eccentric. We are used to it.”

Ichigo rubs his head, his gaze drifting to the blue haired man; at some point, Grimmjow had moved to the couch as it was more comfortable, and he’d ended up falling asleep, cigarette still on his fingers.

It was still lit, and dangerously close to the carpet now, so the teen gets up and carefully plucks it from his fingers, putting it on the ashtray. Then, as an afterthought, he lifts the arm back to the couch and on top of the man’s belly. Grimmjow’s hair was a mess, he had not fixed it at all since the night before last, so it was pointing in all directions, some silvery blue strands falling on his face. 

Ichigo kind of liked the more rugged look; then again Grimmjow would apparently always look handsome in his eyes. 

The teen sighs and smiles a bit, brushing some of the hair strands away from the man’s face. Grimmjow doesn’t stir or react to it otherwise, indicating he was in a deep sleep.

It made sense, given he stayed up the other night to train with Ichigo, and comforted him last night, probably staying up long after Ichigo had fallen asleep, given how sleepy he looked in the morning.  
As Ichigo walks back to the table, he notes that Shinji was looking at him with lift eyebrow.

”What?”  
”So you’re into the bad boy type, huh.”

Ichigo splutters out again, his face turning red yet again - he had to learn to control that, dammit! - And he glares at Shinji, shaking his head furiously.

”No! That’s not...”

”Chill, it’s cool. It’s not up to me who you wanna bang. Just do it when I’m not here.”

Ichigo grumbles as he sits back down, wondering if the man was teasing him or actually being serious. It was hard to say with that poker-face. 

”Although, you picked a pretty bad street-cat for yourself.”

”It’s not like that, we’re just....” Ichigo pauses, suddenly unsure on what to say. Were they friends? Grimmjow had never really said anything like that, but his behavior did indicate he cared for Ichigo.  
In what way, the teen wasn’t sure. 

”Then you oughta stop givin’ him the wrong signals; the guy looks at you like he wants to eat you alive.”

Ichigo stares at Shinji baffled, who still held up a perfect poker face, drinking his third can of soda. Anyone else would be suffering from a serious sugar rush by now, but this guy seemed to be perfectly fine. 

”Before he knocked himself out cold, he kept lookin’ at you, at least when he wasn’t throwing mental daggers at my direction anyway. I gotta have like, hundred metaphorical knives sticking out of my soul or something by now.”

Ichigo blinks, and then glances at sleeping Grimmjow a little surprised. In his eyes, the man had been ignoring them both, letting Ichigo chat with Shinji. 

”Well, Grimmjow tends to be hostile towards new people automatically; he was like that towards me too at first.” Ichigo explains with a soft tone, examining the sleeping man with a smile. He then abruptly realizes how that must’ve looked like, and turns his gaze away quickly, shaking his head.

”I better take my imaginary soul-armor with me the next time I visit then.”  
Ichigo seriously could not tell if the man was joking or not.

 

Once Shinji finally leaves, Ichigo closes the door with a sigh, pondering what he should do next. Glancing at Grimmjow, the man was still asleep. He’d been knocked out for hours now, and Ichigo could not stop but wonder if the man had gotten any sleep recently.

He had never really noticed any fatigue symptoms during their matches, but then again, Grimmjow was meta-human, so perhaps the signs of exhaustion would not show up until much later compared to an average person. 

After contemplating it for a moment, Ichigo decides to go and test the shower; he had not taken one for two days now, since the .... blood had been cleaned off him. 

The water was lukewarm at best, but helped Ichigo feel less icky in his skin. As the water ran down his body, the teen’s mind drifted towards Shinji’s comments involuntarily. 

Sure, Ichigo had seen... hints about something like that at times, but he could not imagine Grimmjow actually being attracted to him that way. 

The man was seven years older for one, and beyond his league, at least in Ichigo’s eyes.

Hell, he probably still thought of Ichigo as a kid despite him being twenty.  
The man had stopped calling him that mostly by now, but it did not mean he didn’t still think that way. 

Eventually Ichigo feels clean enough, and he wraps a towel around himself - it was a giant, fluffy one that was almost like a fuzzy cloak - and exits the bathroom, heading to change his clothes in the bedroom.  
Suddenly, a light flashes from behind the curtains, and a low rumble breaks the silence. Ichigo tenses upon hearing the sound, holding onto the shirt he’d been about to put on.

After a moment, it started raining.

Thunder; a thunderstorm had begun outside, and it was falling heavily on them.  
Ichigo hated thunder: it reminded him of the night his mother was killed.

He’d been just a little boy, covering in fear behind his mum who’d shielded him from the shooter.  
The next thing he knew, she was on the ground, bleeding.  
The boy had tried to shake her awake, but she wouldn’t wake up. 

The man had taken an aim at him too, but then something stopped him from killing the boy, and he escaped the scene.

Ichigo was not sure how long he sat there, tears in his eyes, trying to shake his mum awake.  
”Mum, this is not funny, wake up!”

She wouldn’t react. Her eyes were closed, her body pale and unmoving.

”Mum, please, wake up!”

Nothing.

Ichigo’s vision was blurry from tears now, not just the blinding rainfall.  
Then, footsteps, heading his way.

Had the shooter changed his mind?

The scared kid gets up and begins to run away, into the woods.  
It was cold; he was wet, and covered in blood, his mum’s blood.  
The footsteps behind him got faster.

The person was gaining on him.

Ichigo fastens his pace, terror ringing in his head: his vision was getting red, almost if the blood from his hands had dripped into his eyes. He had to run, keep running or he’d be dead.

Then, his foot hits something, and the kid stumbles to the ground, stumbling to a puddle that further soaked his trembling frame.

He backs away, against a tree as the figure walks closer. There was no way for him to escape, nowhere to hide. 

Then, the figure steps out of the shadows.  
It was not the shooter, it was a white panther.

The boy stops shivering, staring at the beast with widened eyes. He knew this big feline.  
He knew it was safe. 

As the beast walks closer, Ichigo’s vision begins to blur, and he starts rubbing his eyes, trying to get rid of the excess water and red.

”Kurosaki?”

Once Ichigo opens his eyes again, he realizes a few things; one, he was outside in the rain, sitting under a tree with nothing but his boxers on, and two, Grimmjow was crouched down in front of him with a confused frown, squeezing his shoulder. 

The normally spiky blue hair was matted against his head due to the heavy rainfall soaking it.

Ichigo opens his mouth, but all that comes out is a confused, scared whimper. Before he even registered it himself, the teen wraps his arms around the man’s neck, squeezing him tightly as his body trembled, both from cold and fear.

Grimmjow goes still for a moment, then sighs and picks him up, carrying the confused teen back inside. The towel Ichigo had shed was on the porch, but the man ignores it, just walking over it and eventually placing Ichigo to the bed, throwing the blanket over him.

He goes to shut the door, then walks back, slumping to sit on the feet end of the bed, a questioning look in his eyes.

Ichigo just gazes at him dully for a moment, trying to process what just happened.  
Then, as another lightning strike outside, he flinches and curls up tighter under the blanket.

Honestly, he wanted to crawl and cuddle up hiding into Grimmjow’s lap right now, but figured the man would not exactly be okay with it. 

The man examines his reaction for a moment, and then glances at the curtain covered window as another light flashes outside.

”Not a fan of thunder, huh?”  
Ichigo just nods, fearing his voice would break if he spoke. He had no clue what the hell had just happened, but he felt incredibly uneasy and tense right now. 

”.....Why?”

Ichigo remains quiet, then eventually his voice breaks out, barely audible.  
”My mum. It was raining like this when... when it happened.”  
Grimmjow just nods, his face stoic. 

”....Some of ’em. Trauma could also trigger fits. If they saw somethin’ that reminded ’em of that shit, they would be triggered. The reaction would be a fight or flight, depending on the person. It would make ‘em hallucinate.”

”...So...that was also...a Trance fit?”

Grimmjow nods, examining him quietly. 

”Aaroniero had fear-reaction. He got paranoid as fuck during his fits.” Grimmjow states casually, brushing trough his wet hair. Ichigo kind of wanted to reach for it and help the man untangle it, but he remained still, too uneasy to move anywhere.

”Granted, normal people can also get serious reactions from traumas, but our genetics tend ta make the reaction stronger.” The man continues after a moment, gazing at Ichigo tiredly. 

”....Have you ever had a fear reaction, or has it always been anger?”

”Nah. My chemistry doesn’t make a fear response possible, at least so far it hasn’t.”  
Grimmjow rubs his eyes, clearly still tired. One could easily assume that he was just being egoistical, claiming he was not afraid of anything, but it did not matter either way for Ichigo.

 

Ichigo felt a pang of guilt hit him, as this reminded him of the night they’d first met. The same, exhausted worry radiated from the man right now, like that time when he’d been looking for Nelliel.  
”I’m sorry...I did not mean to make you run after me like you would look for Nel.” Ichigo comments softly, gaining a snort from the man.

”At least I’m used to this shit.” He comments nonchalantly, yawning. Ichigo could see his sharp canines clearly now, and it reminded him of the panther he’d seen in his dream, and now in his hallucination moments before his head cleared.

The panther really did represent Grimmjow in his head, though why it was like that, Ichigo wasn’t sure. Maybe because he had a white cat called Panthera?  
”Still...”

Grimmjow just rolls his eyes, ruffling his hair to get most of the water out of it.  
”M’gonna go grab a drink. Doubt I can sleep anymore for a while.” 

He mutters and heads out to the kitchen. 

Ichigo glances at the clock, noting it was 16:30. It felt like much later given how dark it was outside. The teen sighs and slumps against the cushions, clutching onto the blanket around him. He did not feel like dressing up anymore, after that episode. 

A moment later, Grimmjow comes back with a glass of whiskey, and surprisingly, another for Ichigo. The teen accepts the drink and thanks him looking surprised; the man had said earlier he would not get any.

Grimmjow just rolls his eyes again and slumps to sit down at his previous spot.  
Ichigo drinks his; it was kind of strong for his taste, but kind of warmed his insides nicely as it went down his throat.

Slowly, the feeling of dread began to dissipate, and Ichigo relaxed slowly. It was still rumbling outside, but he could sort of ignore it now, lulled by the warmth of the blanket, his drink, and strangely, Grimmjow’s presence at the feet end of the bed. 

”It’s kind of a pain in the ass that your random trigger reaction is fear.”  
The man comments suddenly, and Ichigo looks up at him confused.

”I can deal with a violent reaction; dunno how to comfort a person who’s freaking out.”

Ichigo somehow doubted that; it was clear he was able to do so st least with Nel, and the fact his presence alone comforted Ichigo also spoke volumes.  
It was weird, but it worked. 

”....Random trigger reaction?”

Ichigo asks, realizing he didn’t quite understand what Grimmjow meant. The man sighs and shifts so they were face-to-face, the fingers of his free hand subconsciously tapping at Ichigo’s foot that was peeking out from the blankets in front of him. 

”This whole Trance stuff...it tends to manifest in two ways on us. There’s the bloodthirsty shit that happens in a fight, triggered by adrenaline, and then there are potential random moments, usually happening because somebody went through some serious crap and sees something relating to it.”

Ichigo’s eyes were wide with both curiosity and slight anxiousness. It was kind of intriguing, learning about Grimmjow’s kind, but also terrifying as it now touched Ichigo as well. 

”Out of all ten of us strongest, only three did not have any random reactions: Tia was one, then there was that weird emotionless Goth kid Ulquoirra, and Yammy you saw already.”  
Ichigo just nods; he didn’t have much to say to that.

He didn’t have to really say anything, as Grimmjow was apparently feeling unusually chatty. Perhaps it was the exhaustion, the alcohol, or he did it to keep Ichigo calm.  
Any of those was actually possible; in all likeness it was the combination of all three.

”Aaroniero got paranoid like I said; Zommari would try n’ stab everything that remotely reminded an eye. That freak Szayel would start spewing shit about some people tryin’ ta steal his research, wouldn’t even trust his own brother.”

Grimmjow pauses, and his expression darkens a bit.  
”Yltfordt was his brother by the way.”  
Ichigo frowns at that.

”Did he get angry at you for...?”

”Nah. Szayel cared about him even less than me.” Grimmjow snorts, drinking the rest of his whiskey down at one go, putting the empty glass to the floor and lighting a cigarette. 

”Nnoitra was especially bad; hated that fucker. He especially picked on Nel when he was having a bitch fit.”  
The amount of venom in Grimmjow’s tone spooked Ichigo a little, and he shifts lightly, feeling uncomfortable for a second. 

”The last two...they were older then rest of us. One was an old man who owned the land the orphanage was in, other was this guy who always had a kid around him. Barely saw em. I don’t know what the hell their deal was.” Grimmjow shrugs, blowing smoke out of his lungs, his gaze distant. He was looking towards Ichigo, but not really looking at him, that was clear. 

”I suppose you never really cared for any of the others apart from Nel and Tia.”  
Grimmjow nods with an agreeing hum, his gaze flickering at Ichigo for a second before turning distant again. 

”Never really cared about anybody outside those two, at least up until now.”  
He muses more to himself than Ichigo, but his words held a lot of weight, making the teen flush slightly. Luckily he could blame the alcohol for it this time. 

”It must feel weird then, huh?”

Grimmjow brings the cigarette to his lips again, and Ichigo watches almost hypnotized as the white cloud rose to the roof, before disappearing. It was not a habit Ichigo would ever pick up himself, but it fit to Grimmjow; it was blalant ignorance of the obvious health hazards doing this had. 

That was how Grimmjow was as a person; did not care if something was potentially dangerous or not, he did it if he wanted to. 

Perhaps his superhuman genetics also made him more immune to smoke, hell if Ichigo knew.  
Abruptly, the teen realizes Grimmjow was finally looking at him directly with a stoic look. 

Well, not entirely stoic, there was again something lurking beneath, something he kept reigned in fairly well. The atmosphere around them right now was strangely tense, and Ichigo wasn’t entirely sure if he wanted to move closer to him or move away and hide under the blanket completely.  
He did neither of those things.

”Ya might wanna take another shower; you still got dirt stuck on you.”

Ichigo glances at himself, and indeed, there were some mud stains on his arms and legs.  
The teen sighs, not eager on doing this again, but having the dirt stuck on him wasn’t comfortable either. He then glances at Grimmjow, who had dried by now, but his clothes were dirty still.

”You need one as well.” He points out with amused smile, looking at the man’s now fluffed up hair.  
Grimmjow snorts, then flashes him smirk.

”You want me ta join you?”

Ichigo’s cheeks flush again, and he shakes his head with a grumble.  
”Relax; I’ve already pretty much seen everything worth seeing.”

Ichigo glances at himself remembering that yeah, he only wore boxers right now.  
He also quickly catches on the slight insult in the man’s words, but just rolls his eyes at it. That was not the kind of thing Ichigo was conscious about, like most guys would. 

”Well, good to hear you are liking what you see then.” Ichigo comments casually as he shifts to get off the bed, trying not to show how nervous he actually felt as the man’s gaze followed him. 

 

Ichigo rubs the shampoo in his hair, noting that he even had dirt stuck in there too. The water was now cold, uncomfortably so, though not as bad as the rain outside. Ichigo shakes his head, trying not think about it. He did not want to trigger himself again and force the man run after him into the rain for a second time. 

After he got out of the shower, Ichigo instantly tug some pants on before leaving the bathroom, drying his hair as he did so. Grimmjow was still sitting on his bed, gazing out from the crack on the curtains. The rain was slowing down based on the sound.

The whiskey bottle was on the nightstand now, and Grimmjow had another glass of whiskey on his hand. Ichigo sighs and walks to grab his own glass and bring it to the kitchen, not wanting to leave it lying around. 

After that, he continues trying to get the water out his hair, which was proving difficult as per usual; his hair had grown a bit longer over the past month, and water clung to it more than before. 

Suddenly, a hand grasps the towel, and Ichigo looks over his shoulder, finding Grimmjow stare at him with an annoyed look.

”Keep that up and you tug all of yer hair off.”

Without any further words he proceeds to help Ichigo dry his hair; the teen just stood there, trying to swallow his blush. Grimmjow was again surprisingly gentle, and Ichigo found himself close his eyes and enjoy the slight rubbing of his scalp. 

Eventually Grimmjow was done, throwing the towel on Ichigo’s shoulders. However, instead of moving away, his hands land on Ichigo’s shoulders, sliding down slowly until he was grasping the teen’s arms firmly from above his elbows. 

”You know...”

His hushed voice makes Ichigo jump, as the man was now speaking right into his ear, warm breath sending shivers down Ichigo’s spine.

”That blond bastard was not wrong.” 

The teen felt his entire body shudder, feeling Grimmjow’s lips brush against his ear, his teeth scraping his skin lightly. He could also smell the alcohol from his breath, indicating the man was probably drunk.

How many glasses had he downed since Ichigo went to take a second shower?

The bottle had looked almost empty...

Ichigo lets out a slight gasp as he feels Grimmjow tug him closer against him, nipping at the skin on his neck. His tone was almost purring now, fitting together with the white panther image Ichigo’s mind had begun to associate with the man.

”I just feel like m’gonna break something if I take you.” 

Ichigo was completely still, not having any clue how to react to this; he felt nervous but not in a way that would make him push Grimmjow away. His brain did tell him he probably should, but his body wanted to press even closer to the man. Not knowing what to do, Ichigo remained still, his breathing slightly faster than usual. 

The man nips at his ear again, tracing his lips down Ichigo’s neck, and the teen has to bite his lip to not let out an involuntary moan. 

The strong grip loosens from his arms, and after a second, the heated presence vanishes from behind him, leaving Ichigo stand there frozen, face flushed and with rounded eyes staring ahead and out from the window. There were red marks on the spots he’d held Ichigo from, though he was surprised to see it as the grip had not felt painful. 

After a moment of just standing there, Ichigo forces himself to move, cautiously glancing behind him. Grimmjow had walked back to the bedroom, and was currently pouring himself another glass. There was a tiny hint of a smile dancing on his lips.

Ichigo stares at him for a moment.

Another lightning strike outside, making Ichigo flinch and glance out from the window, before looking back at the man. As if in trance, Ichigo walks to Grimmjow, who turns to look at him with lift eyebrow, drinking his whiskey. He had not really expected Ichigo to come to him this quickly despite his slight flirting. 

The teen just keeps staring at him, feeling his heartbeat quicken beneath his ribs as those blue eyes examined him with now more obvious intention in them, though it was still somewhat restrained as he was clearly unsure on what Ichigo was up to.

Ichigo was not entirely sure what he was doing himself, right now.

He felt uneasy and nervous, his body tensing each time he heard the low rumble outside.  
He also had the urge to be closer to the man again, too.

He felt like the scared kid he’d been on that day, the kid who’d ran out of the door just about half an hour ago in blind panic, not knowing where he actually was. He did not want to have another fit right now.

Grimmjow examines his face quietly for a second, and then slowly puts his glass away to the nightstand, not breaking eye-contact with Ichigo, clearly having figured out what the teen wanted right now. 

The second his fingers leave the glass surface, the teen moves forward, tugging on his shirt-collar and planting his lips against Grimmjow’s, who wraps his arms easily around the smaller frame. The kiss was clumsy at first, but the man easily coaxed Ichigo to follow his lead, and before long, the teen felt pleasant shivers run down his spine. 

Grimmjow was clearly experienced with this, prying his lips open and teasing Ichigo’s tongue with his. The teen mingles his fingers to the blue hair at the back of the man’s head, gaining an approving, low purr from the action. 

The next second, Ichigo could feel the man slump to the bed with him, and the teen moves back, gasping for air as light panic hits him.  
Should he be doing this?

He looks down at Grimmjow, who just looks up at him with an amused smile. It was not a malicious one though, and his fingers kept rubbing Ichigo’s lower back, making the teen shiver and lean back down almost involuntarily, kissing the man again. 

Perhaps it was the alcohol that was loosening restraints from them both - topped with Ichigo’s earlier episode - but the teen felt the sudden urge to be as close to Grimmjow as possible, which the man seemed to be aware of.

He’d seen the look on the teen’s eyes when he’d walked to him, a look that spoke of a need of comforting, as he was afraid due to the weather outside. It was different kind of comfort Ichigo was seeking however, compared to Nelliel. 

Grimmjow flipped them around with a low growl, kissing Ichigo with such force the teen wondered if his lips would bruise from it. 

Then, Grimmjow shifts to kiss his neck, and this time Ichigo doesn’t even bother holding back his pleased moan. The sound seems to spur Grimmjow on, as he adds more pressure to his kisses, biting at the soft skin on Ichigo’s shoulder. His teeth were sharp so it actually hurt, but Ichigo did not have much time to dwell on the pain as the man swiped his tongue over the spot, making the teen gasp and clutch on his hair tighter. 

Grimmjow moves back up to kiss him properly, pinning Ichigo firmly against the bed, hands on his hips. As the blue haired male pulls back, they both were panting heavily, and Ichigo’s brown eyes were wide, filled with a mixture of emotions. 

Grimmjow’s expression was a bit clearer cut, as he licks his lips with a playful smirk, though there was a bit of restraint in there as well. He would never be drunk enough to take advantage of someone, and Grimmjow could tell Kurosaki was still hesitant.

Plus, he was doing this for a specific reason, and it actually wasn’t to fuck Kurosaki, not yet.

As another lightning struck outside, the teen flinches a bit out of fear, dread creeping into his expression again as he glances outside.

Not needing another freak-out, Grimmjow leans down and kisses his cheek, caressing the orange hair gently. It was not exactly natural for him to be this gentle towards somebody he wanted to sleep with, but he’d taken enough notes from taking care of Nelliel to have a clue what to do with Ichigo right now. 

This was not about what he wanted, that could wait. 

Grimmjow was doing this to prevent the teen from bolting out of the door in another panicked fit.  
This was what the teen wanted and needed right now apparently, so Grimmjow was more than happy to provide it. 

After a moment of hesitation, Ichigo turns his head, allowing Grimmjow to kiss him properly again. The teen mingles his fingers into the soft blue hair, letting out small pleased mewls.  
His tense form began to relax, enjoying the attention he was getting from his blue haired companion. Soon enough, Ichigo felt like melted wax beneath him, and protested as Grimmjow suddenly pulled away to look down at him. 

His eyes were still hungry, but he held back, which began to annoy Ichigo a little.  
”I ain’t sleeping with you until yer head is straight, so quit pouting.” The man tells him bluntly, making the teen flush a little, but then a smile creeps up on his face.

Ichigo doesn’t say anything, just props himself up to brush his lips over Grimmjow’s again with half-closed eyelids. He seemed completely relaxed now, and even as another lightning hit outside, Ichigo did not tense, which was a good sign. 

Grimmjow moves off of him now, but doesn’t leave the bed, and snorts as Ichigo rolls over to cuddle against him, hand pressed against the man’s chest. Grimmjow rolls his eyes and begins to play with the orange locks, something he normally only did with Nelliel. 

”Thank you.”  
Ichigo muses after a moment of silence.

”Didn’t want you running around half naked in that weather. M’too tired to go pick you up again.”  
The teen hums, feeling surprisingly sleepy now, and it wasn’t even evening yet. 

It was probably the comfortable warmth and haze that surrounded him that made Ichigo sleepy. Soon enough, he’s knocked out cold, using Grimmjow as a sort of a pillow. The man snorts at that, but doesn’t try to move the teen away from him. 

He shifts enough to sit upright; keeping his fingers mingled in Ichigo’s hair, and digs his phone from his pocket with the free hand. 

Technically speaking they were not supposed to make many calls right now, but Grimmjow had agreed to go watch after Ichigo if he’d have a way to talk with his sister. They’d provided him with the phone and number that should be guarded. Grimmjow was not exactly too trusting on it, but he needed to know she was doing alright.

He doesn’t call Nelliel, figuring it was better not to make a noise and let Ichigo rest after that emotional ordeal, so instead, he texts her.  
The answer came fairly quick.

”Grimmy! Did you reach there safely?”

He snorts at the nickname. He hated it honestly, but did not bother to tell her to stop anymore. She would not listen anyway.

”Yeah. The kid had a fear-fit though.”

”Oh goodness...is Ichi okay?”

Grimmjow glances at the teen, which was resting against him, smiling lightly in his sleep.

”I can see why you two get along; you both like using me as a fucking pillow.”

”Language, Grimmy, and awww aren’t you being nice to him.”

Grimmjow rolls his eyes; he could practically see the overly eager expression Nel probably had right now.

”Yeah yeah, I don’t hate his guts, so what? It’s still a pain in the ass to deal with him when he’s being an emotional whirlwind or some shit.”

”I am pretty sure that you would not bother being there if it was too much for you to care about.”

Grimmjow looks down at Ichigo again, and releases a slow sigh. Nel got him there.  
There was no denying it after what he’d just done; he cared for the orange haired shithead, way more than he was comfortable with. 

It was what it was however, and now was too late to back down.  
His phone beeps, and Grimmjow checks the new message he received from Nel.

”Be honest Grimmy. You don’t just ’tolerate’ Ichigo. Remember what you said in the call yesterday when I asked you if you liked him?”

The man gazes at the text for a moment, his fingers scratching Ichigo’s hair almost subconsciously. The teen lets out a pleased hum in his sleep and cuddles closer to Grimmjow.

”I do remember Nel. I ain’t the one with memory problems. Just because I like the bastard, doesn’t mean I won’t kick his ass if needed.”

”You’re hopeless.”

Grimmjow couldn’t stop but smirk as he put the phone away. 

 

Somewhere, in a dark room, a man is talking with another.  
He’d come back to his boss to give his report on the observations he’d done while running the fight-club.

”I believe he’s gone hiding with the boy.”

The brown haired male hums, having fully expected this: his observations regarding to the Kurosaki kid and his former subordinate had indicated a bond forming between the two. 

”Shall we move the plan forward soon? Ya been waiting awfully long time.” The silver haired man asks, gaining a hum from his boss, who stands up, gazing out from the window for a moment. 

”Not just yet, Gin. I want to see how much power our sexta will be able to pull out from the Kurosaki boy.”  
”Jeagerjaquez was always ta one ta push people beyond their limits, not that many survived to tell the tale.”

Aizen chuckles at that; out of all of his test-subjects, the blue haired boy had been the most peculiar one. 

Near immune to most intimidation and side-effects to his drug, and incredibly difficult to control. 

Even having his only weakness from back then under his grasp had not quite helped.

It did not matter either way. The sixth was doing his job just fine right now, even if he didn’t realize it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Shinji dropped by.  
> We also see a glimpse of Aizen, who has been aware of everything going on because of course he is. He's one of those villains that seem to know everything and anything all the time. It's kind of annoying tbh.  
> He's just not my kind of villain I suppose.


	12. Smoldering feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grimmjow levels with Ichigo, both about his issues as well as the obvious tension between them. Latter in practice.  
> Also, Shinji just can't stop his awkward timings.

The next day, after Ichigo had made them some breakfast, Grimmjow sat him down to discuss more seriously about what they were actually going to do with his episodes. Ichigo had honestly been uneasy that morning at first, pondering what Grimmjow’s reaction would be regarding what had happened, given he’d likely been drunk last night.

They had not spoken about it yet, and Ichigo had a feeling Grimmjow was not ready to address that either, so they focused on more pressing matters. 

”The reason why that Trance-stuff is dangerous, is because it can put an extra strain on your body if it goes on too long. Even metahumans can’t fucking handle it if their own body overloads and explodes on them, metaphorically speaking.” Grimmjow explains his face in a deep frown. 

Ichigo just nods, all his attention on Grimmjow now. The man was clearly enjoying it, but he ignored the way Ichigo’s focus stroked his ego for now. 

”That’s how Aaroniero died; his body was over-stressed, hence a heart attack.”

”So...how do you deal with it?”

The blue haired man snorts and rubs his eyes; this was one of the reasons dealing with Kurosaki’s shit would be difficult, the reason why HE was good at handling the Trance-shit.

”I’m naturally immune to it to some level. Physically, my body refuses to let it go so far that it becomes a strain fer me. That’s why I’m so good at utilizing its power boost in a fight, because I don’t have to fear my own heart giving out on me.” 

Grimmjow pauses then gives Ichigo a pointed look.

”So don’t go and fuck up as this shit is sort of in your hands now.”

Ichigo blinks, and then slowly realizes the meaning behind those words.  
His face slowly gains color, but not as badly as usual.  
Ichigo smiles nevertheless and nods. 

”I won’t. I just need to know how to deal with it.”

Grimmjow hums, examining the teen for a moment. He wasn’t particularly smiling like Ichigo, but there was a hint of a specific kind of light in his intensely blue eyes.

”Anyway. It really starts from the mental shit anyway, the stuff happening in your brain, so that’s what you gotta focus on.”

”Do I need to start practicing yoga or something?”  
The man rolls his eyes at Ichigo and shakes his head.

”Really, dealin’ with a Trance is a lot like handling one of those panic-attacks like things you just had yesterday. Once you recognize the symptoms, you even out yer breath and just focus on here and now, letting your thoughts flow freely and not really focusing on any of them.”

”That...sounds hard to do in a battle.”

”Never said this would be easy. That’s why learning ta fight properly is important to us; we need to be able to let our instincts do the work if our mind starts tripping.”

Ichigo nods, it made sense. Though, it also made him think.  
”Say...there’s one thing I never understood.”

 

The man snorts; he still had to taunt this little shit a little bit at least, even if he was fond of Kurosaki.  
”Only one? So you can actually fit stuff inside that pea-brain?”

Ichigo rolls his eyes; he no longer took offense at the man’s words at all.

”Why? Why create people like you? Not that I mind...”

Grimmjow looks at him amused for a second, but the smirk dies down quickly.

”Aizen’s shit was beyond regular gang crap. He was dealin’ business with foreign countries and shit, not just other mobs. Lotta of folks would love to have inhuman monsters under their wing.”  
Ichigo nods faintly, his curiosity level rising even further; he wanted to know more, but also figured he should not ask. There was a time and place for that, and this wasn’t it, not yet.

”Those matches I did were really just showcases of our strength, let the potential buyers know how well his formula worked.” Grimmjow snorts, brushing through his hair now mildly annoyed. He did not really like talking about this; it made them sound like cattle.  
That’s what they’d been to Aizen though, so it didn’t matter.

”....did anyone ever show interest in you?”  
Grimmjow flashes him a dark grin.

”Apparently I was ’too vicious and unpredictable’ to most.”

Ichigo bites his lip, shifting back uneasily. While he knew Grimmjow would not harm him, Ichigo would never get over how scary that look was.

”Anyway. If you wanna learn to control yer fits, you have to learn how to fight like a metahuman.”  
Ichigo nods; he was ready to do whatever it took to prevent himself from harming others like he had.

”What if I have a fit at this point, when I can’t deal with it yet?”  
Grimmjow snorts and looks at him like he was a dumbass.  
”Then I’ll just kick you in the nuts again. That should work.”

Ichigo groans at the man’s playful smirk; for a second it felt like Grimmjow was not taking this as seriously as one would initially think. However, that worry was soon gone as the man grasps his shoulder, looking at Ichigo straight in the eyes with a serious look.

”Seriously. Don’t worry about that. If you go loopy at me again, I’ll deal with it. Don’t forget which one of us is the experienced one here.”

The last one was a clear jab at more than just Ichigo’s average fighting-skills, but before he could complain about it, Grimmjow grasps his collar and tugs him closer for a kiss.  
It was rougher than last evening, but not any less meaningful.

Once he pulls back with a smirk, Ichigo found it hard to form a coherent thought in his head.  
”Or I’ll just do that. Seems to work well on paralyzing you.” He teases Ichigo as he lets go, making the teen grumble and look away blushing. 

Honestly though, Ichigo would prefer that technique over the crotch-kicking. 

”So? Ready for a daytime match, Kurosaki?” The man asks casually, sounding overly enthusiastic about it. Ichigo almost wanted to roll his eyes at Grimmjow, but he nodded.  
There was no reason not to do it now; he felt good, not tired or hungry or anything, and Ichigo honestly had enjoyed their sparring matches. 

Grimmjow gets up, and gestures towards the yard with a slight playful smirk.

”See if you can deck me in less than three hours.”  
”That’s not how long it took last time.” Ichigo challenges, getting up as well.  
”Last time I was treating ya with kid-gloves. I gotta go harder on you now, because usually when the metahuman genes activate, the power-level raises quickly.”

Ichigo blinks, surprised to hear that. For a moment he expects Grimmjow to smirk at him, indicating the man was jesting, but he just looks at Ichigo with serious look.  
”I’m serious. You gotta up your game ’cause I will.”

Ichigo swallows down, suddenly a bit nervous, but nods.  
He could do this. 

 

Grimmjow had not been kidding.

His attacks were much more vicious and faster now, giving Ichigo barely any time to dodge and counter. Strangely enough he could keep up with it mostly, indicating that Grimmjow had not been lying about Ichigo’s strength rising. 

There were still clear differences in experience, with Grimmjow planning several moves ahead, whereas Ichigo was left with countering each one as it came.

The teen dodges a kick at his stomach by side-stepping, and his punch is blocked by Grimmjow’s arm the next second, before the man slips down to the ground and nearly swipes Ichigo off his feet with a kick. The teen is able to back away in time, but it was hard. 

Grimmjow backflips back up, nearly smacking Ichigo in the jaw with his foot in the process, and backs away for a moment, taking an inventory on the heavily breathing Ichigo.  
He was not exhausted yet, though this time the man was not smirking. It was unusual to see Grimmjow so serious in a fight, but it was probably a good sign, indicating he was taking this seriously and not messing around. 

”Yer stamina is still poor as fuck.” He comments after a moment of silence, cracking his neck. Grimmjow did not sound pleased about this observation, and Ichigo huffs, catching his breath.

”I’m still a beginner, give me a break!”

The man snorts and suddenly moves forward, stopping his foot inch away from Ichigo’s face. Had that kick landed, it would’ve sent him cartwheeling backwards, against the nearest tree with a bloody nose. 

Grimmjow drops his leg, hands in his pockets now as he examines Ichigo with an annoyed frown.  
”That’s a problem. I can’t get much out of ya if you’ll be out of breath after every five minutes.”  
Ichigo huffs, then sits to the ground, taking in a large gulp of air.

It was not like this didn’t bother him too; while his punches and kicks grew faster and stronger, he still ran out of energy so quickly, it was frustrating.

”I doubt there’s a magic cure for that.” He comments rubbing his shoulder that ached a bit.  
Grimmjow remains quiet, examining the out of breath Kurosaki at his feet.

It was truly a problem, namely because it could mean that having a more serious fit could potentially exhaust Kurosaki’s body much faster than what it did with Aaroniero for example.  
Raising one’s stamina was a longer process however, and hard to do if Kurosaki kept getting hit in the face or his gut, or anywhere in his body really.

This was the annoying part of this whole deal: Grimmjow could not teach the bastard - and he meant that word as an endearment - how to control his fits properly, of there was no good groundwork laid down for it first, which required learning to fight in a certain way. 

And to learn the fighting style, Kurosaki needed to get so much stronger and resilient.

”Alright, I think I can go again.” Ichigo states eventually and pushes himself up, stable at his feet and breathing again. Grimmjow remains quiet for a moment, hands in his pockets, until he sighs finally, and nods.

After another hour of doing this, Ichigo’s body felt sore all over, and he felt really tired, his muscles trembling with strain. 

The good thing was that Grimmjow was a little out of breath as well now, looking messier than he usually would after their fights. He still did not look satisfied however, clearly not pleased with Ichigo’s lack of stamina. 

The teen somehow manages to walk his way back to the house, before his feet give away and he crashes to the mat splayed on the living room, staring in the ceiling as it spun in his vision.  
Grimmjow watches him lie there for a moment, before huffing out a sigh and poking Ichigo’s foot with his.

”Get up and take a shower before that stench sticks to the carpet.”

”Fuck you, Jeagerjaquez.” Ichigo manages to huff out, still out of breath. He rolls off the carpet however, and staggers to the bathroom regardless. 

It took him some effort, but Ichigo managed to stay upright long enough to rinse himself properly, and he even gets out and manages to dry himself without falling to the floor.  
As he gets out of the bathroom with new pair of pants and a shirt, Grimmjow had dug out another whiskey bottle - who the hell kept supplying this place with that stuff - and pours him a glass.

”Trust me, it helps better, than painkillers.”

Ichigo doubted that given he was the son of a doctor, but he did not try to argue with it.

He honestly felt like he needed a drink, anyway. The young man slumps down with a sigh, taking a sip from the drink. It was again a bit too strong for his taste, but he’d probably get used to it soon.

Ichigo spends this quiet moment examining his companion again, which was leaning against the counter, typing on his phone. He was probably talking with his sister again, based on the occasional, non-terrifying smirks and eyeroll-accompanied huffs. 

He’d changed his clothes while Ichigo was in a shower, wearing another white top and black jeans, both of whom showcased his strong frame fairly well.  
Ichigo really could not stop but wonder, was his looks caused by the genetic modifications?

”Were all of you Espadas this attractive?”  
He blurts out before he could stop himself, and Ichigo wants to smack himself in the face and sink underground the second those words leave his mouth. Grimmjow glances up at him with an amused smirk and a lift eyebrow, a look that had near completely replaced the angry frown as his default expression. 

”Really? Are you that drunk already?”

Ichigo grumbles, turning his gaze away and rubs his head awkwardly.  
”I was just wondering. It gives you the edge on so many things, so why not that too?”

The man hums and puts the phone away, grasping a chair and sitting on it backwards, folding his arms over the backrest. The man was grinning at him now with a look that one could only describe as smoldering. It made Ichigo’s cheeks flare up, but he forced himself to look at Grimmjow and not turn his gaze away.  
”M’pretty sure it depends on who’s lookin’, Kurosaki.” He points out with a playful tone, and Ichigo could now see what Shinji had meant; Grimmjow definitely looked like he was gonna eat him if he allowed himself to.

It was unnerving and exciting the same time. 

No one had ever looked at Ichigo like this before, and it made him highly self-conscious.  
”Granted you ain’t the first one to ogle at me like that.” The man snickers, gaining an irritated glare from Ichigo, which just worsens the asshole’s smug grin. 

”But you’re definitely the first one I know I wanna fuck more than once.” He continues casually, his voice perfectly neutral and chatty, whereas his eyes burned with the kind of intensity that left Ichigo a little breathless. 

Damn it with this guy, he did not even have to beat him up anymore to make Ichigo feel short of breath!

”Yeah, well...I can’t say the feeling isn’t mutual, but it makes the thought a lot less tempting when you act like it’s somehow a great compliment that you wanna screw me. Trust me, you aren’t THAT special.” Ichigo fires back, somehow managing to keep his voice stable. 

Grimmjow hums with an amused smile, not phased by Ichigo’s half-assed attempt at irritating him. 

”I’m fairly sure between us; it’s you who thinks the thought is somehow like some great achievement, when in truth I’m pretty easy to get laid.” The man chuckles, making Ichigo lift eyebrow at him. 

”It’s getting me to stay, that’s the hard part.” Grimmjow adds softer now, drifting his gaze away to the window. Ichigo remains quiet at that, suddenly feeling a bit of melancholy pour from the man.  
Grimmjow was so used to ditching his lays afterwards, that this whole situation with Ichigo made him reflect on just how lonely he’d honestly been. Sure, Nelliel was there, and Tia, but they were his family. There were some things he couldn’t share with them.

Hell, he barely shared anything about what went in his head with the two, but with Kurosaki...it felt somehow easier. 

Sharing his thoughts without feeling weak about it. 

Like when he’d admitted to Ichigo back in the cemetery that they were alike. It was something he would’ve normally never done, but he’d known Kurosaki would not mock him for it, nor would he find him weak.

Or the whole thing with Yltfordt; he never spoke of it to Tia or Nelliel, never explained the complex thoughts and feelings he had about the whole deal. 

He’d told Ichigo, not really because he wanted to warn him - even if that was the reasoning he’d given at the time - but because it had eased his mind to do so. 

As he turned his blue eyes back to Ichigo, the man notes that the orange haired male was gazing at him with a soft smile. It was the kind of expression most people did not aim at him. Majority of smiles he saw were either cold, battle-hungry smirks, faked, pretendious expressions or forced, terrified masks a person put on in hopes that he would not then notice their fear. 

This kind of smile, born out of pure fondness towards him, only Nel had ever flashed that towards him. Even Grantz had never really looked at him like that.  
There had always been an underlying fear to it, fear of rejection or so. 

”Well. I won’t force you, but it would be kinda nice.” Ichigo admits after a moment of silence, turning his gaze away with a soft flush coloring his cheeks. 

”Thank your luck you won’t have to.”

Ichigo looks up at him, having the gall to look surprised. Grimmjow snorts and brushes trough his hair, giving him an irritated glare.

”Don’t play dumb Kurosaki; I’m pretty sure that it’s pretty obvious how I feel about you at this point.”

Ichigo remains quiet, then his smile widens; it turns so bright that Grimmjow is torn between wanting to tackle Ichigo to the floor and take him right there, or go and punch this annoying little bastard to the face for forcing him to say this out loud.  
Maybe he should do both.

Before neither of them can do anything however, Shinji literally bursts through the door, falling over while carrying a bag of food with him.

The two stare at him baffled, and Shinji waves at them from the floor.

”Did I interrupt something?”  
Ichigo felt his face heat up, but he shakes his head, and manages to force it down for once. He gets up and helps the clumsy man up, who dusts his clothes and gathers the stuff he had back into the bag.

”Figured I should bring you guys some more stuff given how empty the cabinet was.”  
”Actually, it’s near full.” Ichigo comments awkwardly.

”Oh? Well then I just eat this myself.” The man comments, grabbing and apple and biting it casually, like his entrance had not been awkwardly timed at all. Shinji Hirako really did not seem to have any grasp on the concept of awkward in general.  
Then, the man suddenly tilts his head and examines Ichigo, making the teen shift nervously under his stare. 

”You look like you’ve gone through some real workout. Did he screw you already?”

Ichigo coughs and shakes his head, explaining that they’d just had a match earlier, hence his slightly exhausted state and injuries.

Grimmjow gets up from the chair and lights a cigarette, walking past them to the yard with his phone, purposefully bumping to Shinji so that the man dropped his stuff again.  
”Well he doesn’t like me.” The blond man comments, rubbing his arm; he still did not sound bothered at all. The man turns to look at Ichigo, his face still stoic.

”Did I cock-block him or something?”

Ichigo goes quiet, just staring at him dully. Why was this guy spewing out random, awkward crap like this? The teen had no bloody clue how to react to it. 

”I’m sensing the answer is a yes.” Shinji concludes, picking up his stuff again and bringing it to the cabinets. Ichigo just watches him stuff them inside the cabinets, wondering how the hell he had managed to get his job if the man was this clumsy and awkward. 

Ichigo glances at the yard, but noting Grimmjow’s slightly sullen expression, he decides not to go to the man now. It was not like Ichigo wasn’t a little disappointed about Shinji’s interruption, as he could sense something was about to happen.

However, he could not be so rude as to tell the man to leave.  
”Have you guys even eaten yet? Doesn’t seem like it.”

Yeah, now that the man mentioned it, he was hungry; aside from breakfast, they had not eaten in hours. Grimmjow probably wasn’t that bothered yet, but Ichigo was still normal-human levels when it came to appetite.

”I suppose I could help ya fix something. I doubt Mr. Grumpy-cat wants to help.”  
Ichigo just nods with an awkward smile. Given Grimmjow’s expression, he’d likely want to try and poison Shinji or something. 

Not that he would; it was not Grimmjow’s style. 

He’d rather beat the shit out of the man or literally punch hole right through him. The thought made Ichigo shudder, as he recalled the story about Luppi Grimmjow had revealed to him. It made him subconsciously touch his chest, even though he knew Grimmjow would not do that to him. 

”So, boss-man also wanted to know how you’re doing. Ukitake I mean. What should I tell him?”  
”Well...let’s just say that since we only just started, not much progress has been made, though Grimmjow has a grasp on how my case works specifically already, so I guess that’s something.”  
The man nods, and then puts the water on to boil some noodles. 

 

The lunch was a little awkward, namely because Ichigo could now see what Shinji meant with throwing daggers; Grimmjow was giving the man a glare every now and then, refusing to talk to him. Shinji did not seem phased, as he kept asking questions, to which Ichigo answered instead, dodging the ones he figured Grimmjow would not want him to answer. 

It was like an awkward family dinner, really, where two participants did not like each other.  
Or rather, one didn’t like the other, and the said other was oblivious to it.

”Well, good to know you two are getting along; boss was worried a little that Grumpy cat would try to scratch your face off or something.”

”I will rip yours off if you don’t stop talking.” Grimmjow grunts at the man, keeping his eyes on the phone. Glancing at it Ichigo could see Nel remotely calming her brother, trying to keep him from snapping at Shinji completely. 

”Ripping my face off won’t do much. You’d have to dislocate my jaw too, and tear my vocal chords.”

”I keep that in mind.”

Ichigo glances between the two, seriously wanting this awkwardness to end. He knew Grimmjow would in all likeness not do anything, but the same time he could not be sure about it.  
More so, he still was baffled at how Shinji just did not seem to care about the threats, almost if he knew Grimmjow wouldn’t do anything. 

Or his sense of self-preservation was nonexistent; Ichigo wasn’t sure which it was. 

Eventually, Shinji does get up to leave again, but not before he manages to annoy the blue haired man with yet another aloof comment, making the man grind his teeth and rub hos eyes not to smack the guy’s head against the floor. 

Honestly, Ichigo was not certain why Grimmjow disliked Shinji so much. Sure, the man was...awkward, but that’s about it. Maybe it was his ego; seeing somebody disregard his threats so easily might have pissed Grimmjow off bad, even if he’d never admit it. 

Once Ichigo closes the door, he turns to look at Grimmjow whose back was turned to him now. His expression had calmed down now, and he seemed focused on whatever he and Nel were discussing. Ichigo walks closer hesitantly, placing a hand on the man’s back.

”You alright?”  
Grimmjow sighs and nods, glancing at him.  
”That asshat pisses me off so much.”  
”Why though? I get he’s...awkward and all, but...”  
Grimmjow huffs and turns to look at him with an unusually dark expression.  
”He reminds me of Nnoitra. Same kinda face with a dumb wide grin.”  
Oh. Wasn’t this guy....?

”He picked on Nel.” Grimmjow finishes Ichigo’s thought, and suddenly his hostile behavior was much more understandable, although still unnecessary. The teen sighs and shifts his hand to press it against his chest instead, feeling the heartbeat under his fingertips.

”Shinji is not him. Try not to be so hostile towards him, he’s trying to help.”

Grimmjow snorts, but says nothing to that. 

Ichigo lifts his gaze to look up at him, and for a moment neither of them spoke. It was another one of those quiet moments, like the ones between them during the briefing Urahara had given. 

Wordless discussions, where nothing really needed to be voiced out loud. Ichigo leans closer, brushing their lips together tentatively, now both hands resting against the man’s chest. 

It doesn’t take Grimmjow long to grab him by the waist and intensify the kiss, to the point Ichigo’s head began to spin again. Grimmjow’s phone makes a sound again, and he grunts annoyed, separating from Ichigo’s mouth briefly to glance at the message sent by his sister, while still holding the flushed orange haired teen firmly against him.

He sends her a brief reply, stating that he was busy, before literally throwing the phone aside and forcing Ichigo against the nearby wall, making him gasp in surprise. 

Now that he did not have to worry over Ichigo’s mental state like last time, the man was much less restricted with his actions, and it showed; the teen found himself gasping for air much quicker, and the kisses and bites to his neck and jaw were much more forceful, although still not unpleasant. 

Ichigo grasps the blue hair firmly, tugging on it, gaining a pleased purr from the man as he lifts the younger male off the floor with ease, making Ichigo wrap his legs around the man’s waist. 

After a while of the rough, yet pleasant treatment from the man, Grimmjow pulls away a bit and lets Ichigo breathe for a moment. His arms were around Grimmjow’s neck, not allowing the man go very far, not that he wanted to. The blue hair was a mess again, several strands landing on his face, and Ichigo wasn’t much better, feeling - and looking - completely disheveled. 

”I’m starting to think you were pissy at Shinji for interrupting us.” Ichigo teases the man, who snorts, biting his ear with a smirk.

”Maybe.”

The teen felt laughter bubble in his chest as the man nuzzles his neck, but it is soon swallowed by Grimmjow’s mouth as he kisses him again, now backing away from the wall and carrying the teen towards the bed.

He pretty much drops Ichigo down, making the teen yelp and glare up at him with an annoyed expression. It doesn’t last long however as Grimmjow just flashes him one of those frustratingly charming smirks, making the teen smile as well.

The man then climbs to the bed as well and pushes him down, capturing his lips again with a low growl. Ichigo mingles his fingers into the strands of blue hair again, other arm slipping around Grimmjow’s shoulders to keep him there.

The man keeps his hands on Ichigo’s waist, up until he slips one of them beneath the teen and under his shirt, rubbing the skin on his back. Ichigo releases a pleased sigh at that, thoroughly enjoying the moment. 

Grimmjow shifts away from his mouth, tracing a line down his neck, biting the skin there. Ichigo gasps a bit as he feels it, tightening his grip on the man’s hair.  
”Fuck, why are your teeth so fucking sharp?” The teen whines a little, gaining another playful nibble as a punishment. Grimmjow lifts his head to look down on Ichigo, licking his lips with a playful grin that fully showed his canines.

”I swear; they gave you guys everything they could weapon-vise.” Ichigo grumbles, rubbing his neck from the spot Grimmjow had bit him, surprised not to feel any blood there.  
”You ain’t wrong with that. The fights I had could get bloody.” 

Grimmjow snickers at Ichigo’s slightly unnerved look, and leans closer to nip his ear again, his voice hushed now.

”Relax. I got better things to do with these when it comes to you.”

Ichigo felt his heart flutter a little at the implication of those words; it was not like he wasn’t aware where this could lead, but Grimmjow just had this uncanny way of making him feel nervous and kind of vulnerable when held down like this. 

Well, truthfully speaking, anyone would feel nervous in this situation, probably, when it came to Grimmjow Jeagerjaquez.  
It was just that in Ichigo’s case it was actually not easy to do; he was known to be foolishly brave to a fault, so making the teen this nervous with just words was not an easy feat. 

Grimmjow spent another moment at nibbling and biting his neck and ear, soothing the marred skin with his lips, before shifting back to kiss the younger male properly. 

”...It still feels like you’re holding back a little.” Ichigo mutters softly, scratching the blue locks with his fingers.  
”Habit. Yer still too weak ta handle me at my full strength.” Grimmjow comments casually, staring down at Ichigo’s brown eyes with the kind of look that probably would’ve made a weaker person hold their breath so long that they passed out. 

”Even in the bedroom?” Ichigo challenges him, gaining an amused chuckle.  
”Especially in the bedroom.” Grimmjow whispers into his ear, making Ichigo shiver again. 

Now, despite his initial wording, Grimmjow ends up being pretty rough with his handling of Ichigo, nearly ripping the shirt off him. The orange haired male whimpers lightly as he feels sharp nails rake his back and teeth bite into his skin again.

He did not mind it though; Ichigo more than enjoyed the sense of thrill, the adrenaline rush filling his head that Grimmjow’s antics caused him. He grasps a fistful of the blue hair and pulls on it hard to reach the man’s mouth again, kissing him with almost equal ferocity.

Ichigo felt a large amount of heat creep up to his loins, and as the man above him shifts lightly, the friction against him made Ichigo breathe out a moan, and he wrapped his legs around the man’s waist, pressing their bodies closer together.

As Grimmjow felt his eagerness, the man smirks against his skin, shifting to put more pressure on Ichigo’s crotch, making the man beneath gasp as he felt the hardness pressing against him.  
”Ya up for this, Kurosaki?”

Ichigo almost groans, and glares at the man as he pushes up a bit again to look at him in the eyes.  
”I swear, if that was a pun...”

His complaint dissolves into a moan as Grimmjow moves his hips, adding more friction between them.

”Yep, you’re definitely up for it.” He says with a mischievous grin, the kind that made Ichigo want to punch the man in the face and kiss him right after.  
Ichigo props himself up to his elbows, biting Grimmjow’s lip, before kissing him again. 

”I swear, if you’re going to make any more of those terrible puns; I’d rather let you kick me in the crotch again.”  
Grimmjow chuckles lowly at that, the tone sending shivers down Ichigo’s spine. 

”I’ve got other plans for that.”  
He whispers into Ichigo’s ear, tugging on his pants now. 

 

 

By the time Grimmjow was done with him, Ichigo was lying on his belly completely boneless - metaphorically speaking - with scratch- and bite-marks all over his body. He was panting into the pillow, his face flushed crimson red. 

Grimmjow was lying on top of him; face buried against his neck as he breathed in the younger’s enticing scent. He shifts up a little, lifting his head and starts playing with the messed up orange locks, mingling trough them and massaging Ichigo’s scalp.

The teen beneath him sighs pleased as he feels it, somehow managing to go even slacker beneath him. It had been ages since Ichigo had slept with anyone - and his first time had been a classic awkward teenage case where both parties were hopelessly drunk - so his body was extra sensitive about everything right now, from the fingers on his hair, to the warm weight resting on his back, to the canvas softly rubbing against his bare skin as he moved. 

Ichigo had stopped trying to get on top by the time Grimmjow pushed into him, and had just clung to the man’s shoulders, biting his lip to not voice out his pleasure too loudly.  
Well, he’d tried to hold back anyway, but then Grimmjow had given him such a smoldering, dirty kiss that Ichigo had forgotten about his dignity and voiced everything out shamelessly.

Once Grimmjow was done with him, they both had been panting heavily, kissing each other for a few moments again, before Ichigo had rolled away and onto his belly, clutching a pillow and trying to get his breathing back under control.

Eventually though, a warm weight had climbed on him, and there he was now, just relaxing under Grimmjow’s touch again, eyes slipping closed. 

”Alright, you took that better than I thought; I suppose kicking your ass has done something right.”  
Ichigo snorts, opening one eye to glance at the man. Grimmjow was in much better shape yet again, though his hair was a complete mess and there was a small mark on his neck at the spot Ichigo had bit him. 

”If that was your best, I’m quite frankly disillusioned.”  
The man snorts and rolls his eyes, leaning closer until he reached Ichigo’s ear.

”Had to hold back at least a little to protect your dignity somewhat, as you clearly stopped doing it mid-way through.”  
Ichigo’s face flushed into a deeper shade of red as he recalled the way he’d whimpered out the man’s name. He did not regret it though, not when the response to it had been a warm, enthusiastic kiss.  
They turn quiet for a moment, as Ichigo indulges in the feeling of warm fingers rubbing his scalp. It was so easy to forget in a moment like this, how powerful those hands actually were, how easily Grimmjow could crack his neck and shatter his skull.

Even if Ichigo was enhanced as well, he was a rookie; nowhere near to his top level of power he could have. Ending his life would be so easy for Grimmjow, especially now that Ichigo’s guard was down.  
He would never do any of that, however. 

Kurosaki was too important at this point for him to even consider it, like he had in the past.  
Sure, he enjoyed kicking the stubborn bastard’s ass, but he also loved having him in a breathless, spent heap beneath him like this. 

”.......We might wanna skip the training routine for the rest of the day. My bottom hurts pretty bad right now.” Ichigo admits after a moment, and as he predicted, Grimmjow barks out an amused laugh, before pressing his nose into the orange locks.

”Weakling.” The man snorts at him.

”Bastard.”  
Ichigo mumbles, but his lips were curved into a smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The similarity between Nnoitra and Shinji Grimmjow sees bases purely on how their teeth are drawn.  
> I ended up having bit of a writer's block with this chapter, as I just wasn't feeling the cuddles when writing it, if you get what I mean ;)


	13. Self doubt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo is frustrated with his lack of progress, and starts to have other doubts as well.  
> Grimmjow tries to get the bonehead to see that he's earned his right to his trust alright, but a voice in his head keeps telling Ichigo he's not good enough.

Ichigo woke up after another, gut-wrenching nightmare about blackness and pools of blood and mad cackle echoing around him.

He stumbles off the bed and manages to find his way to the bathroom, washing his face with cold water and releasing a deep breath. His body was shaking even now, and his heartbeat was quick, thundering in his chest.

After a moment, a figure appears behind him, leaning against the doorway with crossed arms over his chest.

As Ichigo looks at him through the mirror, he could not stop a tiny miffed thought from appearing; Grimmjow was wearing loose black sweats, but he was otherwise bare, and Ichigo was yet again visually reminded of their strength difference. Why did he have to be so weak compared to him?

Not just that; why did he always manage to look so good and move so graciously that the teen almost never heard him appear behind him until he was already there? Ichigo sometimes felt like he was a beached whale, clumsy and hopeless, compared to Grimmjow.

”Ya got a mean look there, Kurosaki.” The man comments simply, lifting eyebrow as they make eye-contact through the mirror.

This was the sixth night in a row that Ichigo had woken up from a difficult nightmare.

The two first times he’d ended up a sobbing wreck, having to be comforted by his companion, but it had been so embarrassing to Ichigo that he’d chosen to get up and walk around instead from now on. It was not just the nightmares though; often times, during their fights, Ichigo’s mind began to distant itself from his body in a dangerous manner, that Grimmjow often had to literally pin him to the ground so he would not end up injuring himself excessively.

He was honestly afraid of their training matches now, worrying that he’d either hurt Grimmjow in one of his fits, or start coughing out blood as his body over-reached its limits. It had happened once, and it had freaked him the hell out.

Grimmjow had been calmer, but he’d had that dissatisfied frown in his face, which was honestly the worst for Ichigo.

He hated that expression, more than anything else.

It made him feel like a failure.

The man did not mean to belittle him with that expression though; it was just a sign of concern, concern over the fact that if this kept up, Ichigo’s life would be in jeopardy. Because of that, Ichigo had never admitted his hatred of the expression out loud.

”I’m just frustrated. It feels like I’m not making any progress.” He huffs and turns around, leaning against the sink. On top of everything, despite their training matches, Ichigo was still so much weaker than the blue haired man, and it bothered him about as much as his seizures.

Surely, if he was indeed enhanced as well, he should be able to do a bit more damage than he was right now.

They did have a huge difference between them when it came to experience, but still.

Sometimes, the gap felt unreachable and it was seriously fucking him up on the inside, even if Ichigo would not admit it. He did not really understand why he was even bothered by the situation in the first place. What did it matter if in the end Grimmjow would be stronger than him? He was not doing this to win a battle with him or something, he was trying to learn to control his newfound potential strength so he would not end up dying from a heart-attack or something.

Grimmjow was far more experienced fighter anyway so it made sense for him to be better at this; he was a warrior where Ichigo was a rookie.

 

_Perhaps you feel you’re not worthy of what he's giving you._

 

Ichigo squeezes his eyes shut and rubs them, hearing that voice in his head again, the one that had begun to whisper him things he did not want to admit. Ichigo was not sure if it was something serious or just his imagination, so he had not told Grimmjow about this detail.

Truth to be told, he heard it a lot now, especially when he lied in bed, awake and watching his companion sleep, more relaxed than he’d been when they met. It was almost if their roles had flipped around.

Grimmjow was in control of himself, while Ichigo was shaking apart from the seams.

It was the same feeling then, the one that had triggered his first seizure during one of their training matches. The feeling of unworthiness, that the man was somehow unreachable for him, like he didn’t really deserve the affection given to him, because he was not strong enough. Out of all of the troubles plaguing his head, somehow this one bothered him the most, not the violent or panicked fits, not the fact he wasn’t getting stronger that much, not the risk on his life.

No, he was fucking bothered because he felt he was somehow not worthy of Grimmjow’s heavy-handed, rough affections.

It was the strangest fucking thing to think about and feel, because Ichigo was fairly sure that’s how Grimmjow had felt about his kindness at first.

 ”Oi. Don’t space out on me.” The man tells him with his usual gruff tone, and Ichigo looks up at Grimmjow, realizing he’d yet again managed to walk right in front of him without Ichigo even noticing.

A warm hand grasps the side of his neck, rubbing his skin lightly and feeling the pulse beneath.

”I don’t get it.”

Grimmjow lifts eyebrow again, but says nothing.

”If I am really supposed to have similar strength to yours, why do I only suffer from the bad side-effects, instead of getting stronger?”

”Well, given yours were inherited and not injected, it’s likely the shit works differently.”

Ichigo looks at him with a frustrated stare, and slaps the hand away, marching out of the bathroom. He slumps to the bed, spreading himself out and staring at the ceiling. Grimmjow just walks beside him, hands in his pockets and gazes down at the teen wordlessly. ”I just...I don’t know, I guess I was expecting something more, instead of getting my ass handed to me every fucking time.”

”Nobody’s a pro in a day. It took me years to get as good as I am now.”

Ichigo sighs and tilts his head towards Grimmjow. He knew his frustration was in all likeness childish, but he couldn’t help it. He just felt a sting of jealousy each time he saw the man’s frame, let alone during their fight when he effortlessly wiped the floor with him.

Recently, even when he’d kissed Ichigo, all the youth could think of was that he didn’t deserve it, that kind of attention from somebody like Grimmjow, if he couldn’t even challenge him properly.

It was stupid, childish and irrational, but something was feeding this train of thought, and Ichigo did not know how to put on the breaks.

”I just feel like I’m wasting your time.”

Grimmjow snorts, and slumps to lie down beside him, leaning against his arm as he tilted his body towards the teen, whose face now gained a bit of color as if reflexively.

”Yes, when you whine like this you are. But I tolerate it ’cause I get it. It would piss me off too if I knew I could be stronger, but for some reason could not get there.”

”I’m pretty sure you getting any stronger would mean the end of the world.”

Grimmjow chuckles at that, a playful grin on his lips. ”You might be right with that one.”

They remain quiet for a second, before Ichigo sighs and shifts closer, pressing his head against his companion’s chest. Grimmjow mingles his fingers into the orange locks almost reflexively, rubbing the young male’s scalp.

”Sometimes I kind of wonder why did you even bother to start liking me.”

”Trust me, if yer gonna complain like a little bitch more often, I’ll question that too.”

Ichigo rolls his eyes at the crude comment, but he could not stop a tint of worry creep up into his mind. What if Grimmjow actually meant that? What if his childish frustration over the situation was making him--

A hand tugs on his hair so Ichigo has to tilt his head and look up at the man, who was looking at him with the ’Zero-bullshit-tolerance’ look as Ichigo had begun to call it nowadays.

”Stop fretting over useless shit, Kurosaki.” The man tells him firmly, his voice laced with irritation.

Ichigo just looks up at him quiet, not knowing what to say, or if he even should say anything.

”I get that yer frustrated with the slow-progress you’re makin’ but you gotta stop questioning yourself so much, ’cause that ain’t gonna help either.”

Ichigo blinks, then releases a slow sigh and rolls around, turning his back to the man for a moment as he let go of his hair. He knew it was stupid, all the doubts he was having, but Ichigo could not help himself; not when he saw somebody carry the strength he was said to possess with such ease, yet Ichigo could not muster even a fraction of it. It was again the slight feeling of unworthiness, a feeling Ichigo had no idea where it originated from.

”.......Is this some late sappy teenager hormone shit you got going?”

Ichigo freezes, and he could hear an amused chuckle from behind him, before a hand yanks him back around and on his back so Grimmjow could snicker at his face. Ichigo grumbled, feeling his face heat up from embarrassment and he turned his gaze aside.

Once Grimmjow’s laugh dies down, he just leans his head against his palm, a wide grin on his face. Ichigo kind of wanted to scoot away and hide under the bed or something, but it was too late; Grimmjow had caught on to the root cause of Ichigo’s frustration, and was clearly finding it hilarious.

”So....you’re pissy n’ shit because you think you’re not good enough fer me?”

His tone was still amused, but there was a tiny hint of understanding in it too. Grimmjow was aware of his potential charm and good looks, and the way it could sometimes put people off - when his dickish attitude didn't - making them think they weren't on his level.

Ichigo bites his lip, and after a moment nods with slight hesitation, gazing the ceiling.

”It’s just...when I see you fight and do all that crap like it was as easy as breathing, or when you just, I don’t know...move around.” Ichigo had to really force those words out of his throat, because it was just so fucking awkward to speak about this.

Namely, because Ichigo fully expected Grimmjow to mock him about it.

”I just sometimes wonder if...I mean...you could get anyone you wanted.” Ichigo muses out quietly daring a glance at his companion whose face was stoic now, examining him quietly with the insanely blue eyes.

”You’re...aww hell, you’re probably the hottest guy I’ve known, and I’m just some sorry ass kid with an eye-rapingly bright haircolor.”

Grimmjow snorts at that.

”I thought it was more of a women’s deal to worry over looks.”

”I suppose you would not know about that, given you never likely had to worry about it; I bet you’ve always been naturally highly attractive.” Ichigo comments almost bitingly, wanting to curl away and hide again.

He doesn’t, though as he knew Grimmjow would easily tug him back to face his brilliantly blue eyes.

”You oughta know by now that I don’t stick around fer somebody this long just for their looks.”

The man points out with another snort and pushes himself up, grasping the lighter and cigarette pack from the nightstand and lightning himself one. He blows some smoke out, before turning his gaze back down at Ichigo, who scrambles to sit up too, leaning his back against the wall. The blunette found it both amusing and ridiculous that Ichigo was worrying over something as insignificant as this.

Then again, he was younger than Grimmjow and much less experienced with relationships - not that Grimmjow had that much of it either when it came to this particular type - so it was kind of understandable he was fretting over meaningless shit.

”I guess....this whole time, a tiny part of me just wondered...why.” Ichigo turns to look at Grimmjow cautiously, who just lifts eyebrow at him.

”You were so hostile to me at the start, hell; at times I thought you wanted to kill me.”

”I _did_.”

”Exactly my point.” Ichigo sighs and rubs his eyes, before continuing.

”What changed your mind?”

Grimmjow found the question both annoying and obvious, when it came to the answer.

Yet, he got it why Ichigo was asking.

For Grimmjow, this process of going from fierce hate or at least huge level of disdain to what they had now was normal.

Getting on his good graces was incredibly hard, and everybody - aside from Nel - had to start out from scratch, working hard to gain his trust. Most did not find it worth it due to his attitude and behavior, but that was sort of the point.

Only those who truly gave a shit would eventually see past it and get to witness his kinder side.

Well, as kind as Grimmjow could be which basically meant a bit less death-threats and mockery. He was better at showing it through actions than words anyway.

Kurosaki had never dealt with somebody like this before, so it was natural he felt confused about it. Grimmjow sighs and rubs his eyes, before bringing the cigarette back to his lips, thinking how the hell should he explain this to the younger male, who was looking at him with an expectant, uneasy expression.

”Everybody starts from my bad side.” He began, and Ichigo blinks, almost if the fucker was surprised that he actually bothered to answer. Grimmjow rolls his eyes, breathing some smoke in before he continues. 

”Only those I find worth my time get to see what I’ve shown you. I don’t act like a dick just for the fun of it.” He pauses, and smirks.

”Well, maybe a little, but there’s a reason behind it.”

Ichigo just sits there quietly, ears perked up - metaphorically speaking - like he was a curious child on a lesson.

”Gaining my trust is ridiculously hard for a reason, Kurosaki; I don’t like havin’ many weaknesses, and another person more to give a shit about is a weakness. So they damn well need to be _worth it_.”

Ichigo blinks, and then seems to contemplate his words closely for a moment.

”So. If yer still questioning if you’ve earned that right...”

He shifts closer and plants a firm, slightly ash-tasting kiss on Ichigo’s mouth, making the younger man sigh involuntarily, as his eyes slipped closed. As Grimmjow pulls back, the orange haired male smiles at him, his face flushed now with something else than embarrassment.

”Thanks. For explaining this to me.”

”You’re such a fuckin’ bonehead at times; I should’ve known I’d have to do this sooner or later.” Grimmjow snorts, blowing smoke right on Ichigo’s face now, making him cough and glare at him irritated as he rubbed his watery eyes.

The blue haired bastard just smirks at him, the kind of smirk that made Ichigo’s heart flutter no matter how much he tried to resist the effect.

 

 

 

 

Shinji’s next visit was less awkward and tense, namely because Grimmjow was too busy training himself and kicking the wooden targets to pieces to care for his presence. It was always kind of amazing to watch, just how strong he was. Ichigo found himself gaping for the third time now, and it was kind of embarrassing as Shinji could tell very clearly what he was doing.

”Quite a sight I suppose, huh?” The man comments, drinking another one of those sugary sodas he apparently had a love-hate relationship with, complaining about the overly sweet taste every now and then, yet drinking it anyway.

Ichigo just nods, and then bites his lip, not meaning to admit it like that. He forces his gaze back to Shinji, who’d brought him some stuff from home. Namely more spare clothes and few letters from his family and friends that Ichigo had not red yet, at least not all of them.

Things seemed mostly fine at home now, there had been no suspicious activity near his house anymore, indicating that Aizen had lost interest. While it made Ichigo feel relieved, he also sensed that it had to be because of his departure, which made him uneasy.

”So, you still getting your ass kicked or?”

”Yeah. I mean, my stamina is marginally better, but Grimm is still not happy with it.” Shinji lifts eyebrow at the nickname, drinking his soda.

”I figured there was something going on between you two.”

Ichigo coughs, his face reddening yet again, and he rubs his hair with an awkward smile. ”I guess it’s kind of obvious at this point.”

”Given how you keep gaping at him, yes it is.”

The young man groans and drops his head to the table. It was really embarrassing just how obvious his crush apparently was to others.

”I think your dad knows too.” Ichigo looks up abruptly, feeling shock rattle his system. There was no way his aloof of a pops would have noticed!

”Isshin is more perspective than you might think. He noticed a lot of details that others didn’t when he worked with us.”

Shinji explains to him with that same stoic expression he often wore.

”Oh god...dad’s gonna kill me.” Ichigo groans, hiding his face in desperation.

”I don’t know, he seemed pretty chill about it when I spoke to him.” Ichigo looks up at Shinji, who was currently holding the letter from Isshin in his hand, examining it curiously. Ichigo was unsure if he should tell the man that reading other people’s private letters was not exactly appropriate, but then again he doubted there was anything too alarming there.

”Yeah, I think he’s chill.” Shinji pushes the letter to the now confused Ichigo, who picks it up and reads.

 

_”Ichigo_

_I hope you are doing well, wherever you are. Shinji assured me that you were fine the last time he checked on you, and I trust in his word. I still feel like I need to apologize for not telling you the truth about your mother. We just thought that it did not really matter, as nobody expected you to inherit that side of her genes.”_

the young man rolls his eyes at that; his dad did not really need to apologize, he understood why they’d hidden it.

_”Now, I must admit; I was a little surprised to see how close you’d grown to that man. That being said, after what I witnessed, I am fairly certain you are in safe hands;_

_when he showed up to our house after what happened to you, I was frankly taken aback by his behavior. Last time I saw that boy react the way he did, was when his sister had come back from the asylum after the abuse she’d received, and he’d come to yell at our faces for betraying his trust. It was that same protectiveness I witnessed back then, that flared up from him now. I knew right away then, that he'd grown fond of you in a level that could perhaps be a little worrying, if I did not have full trust in your judgment, which I do._

_Grimmjow is not a bad kid entirely, he never was in my eyes._

_In fact, as you grew up and hit your teenage years, it was almost like a deja vu as you reminded me of him with that temper of yours.”_

 

Ichigo pauses, gazing at the words in front of him in silence.

_”You just need to understand this, Ichigo; Grimmjow is the kind of person, whose trust is hard earned, and once you lose it, you may lose it forever._

_I may have never interacted with him directly, but I observed him back when this whole situation started. In a strange way, I am happy you met him; I believe that you won’t let him down like we did. I have full faith in you that you can help fix what we messed up. Not with this situation with Aizen, but what we did to his faith in people; he honestly deserves some levity in his mind after all the things the world has put him trough, and it seems you have helped him achieve that, at least partially._

_I hope he'll make you as happy as you seem to be making him.”_

 

Ichigo drops the letter, not knowing what to say.

Those were very serious words, and they put a lot of weight on his shoulders. The same time however, Ichigo knew his dad would have not written this had he not had absolute trust in him. As Ichigo turns to look outside at the man, who was now crouched to the ground, covered in sweat and drinking from his water bottle, he felt his gut twist in worry; maybe his dad trusted him, but Ichigo was unsure about it.

 

 

 

That evening, he lied awake, gazing the ceiling. Grimmjow’s back was turned to him, and he was out cold, given by the even breathing. As his gaze drifted to the form resting beside him, Ichigo could not stop but have his worry flare up again.

Despite what Grimmjow had told him the night before, and the absolute faith he knew his dad had on him, Ichigo honestly did not know if he could do this.

It was true that he’d clearly helped the man’s mental state a lot, given that previous permanent frown now rarely appeared on his face, replaced by a trademark grin. But...Ichigo could still fuck this up somehow. There were so many uncertainties given the situation, the issues with his own mental state now, and there was the whole thing with Nel too. The fact he’d become self-conscious about his bloody looks did not help.

”The only thing that’s gonna make me hate you is if Nel gets hurt because of you.”

Ichigo almost jumps, hearing the gruff tone break the silence. The blue haired man shifts to his back, tilting his head towards Ichigo with a serious look. So he’d read the letter too? ”I’m pretty sure yer dad did not write that shit to you to make you feel uneasy.”

”Well it’s clearly not doing its job as I feel kind of like hiding under a rock right now.” Ichigo comments with an uneasy laugh, rubbing his head nervously.

”In all likeness, he wanted ya to understand what you got yourself into. He’s worried that you get your heart broken or some sappy shit like that.” Grimmjow comments quietly after a moment as he reaches a hand up to play with the orange strands.

”Still, it’s a lot of pressure given all the other shit dumped on me already.”

The man shifts closer, leaning over Ichigo to brush their lips together slightly. It always felt good, even if undeserved on some days.

”Yeah. I do think writing that to you at this point was dumb as shit, because I’m pretty sure you ain’t gonna fuck this up for me.” The man chuckles lowly, his voice sending shivers down Ichigo’s spine as he heard it.

”I don’t know, Grimm; I think he just, I guess he wanted to make sure I was prepared or something; it gotta be nerve-wrecking for any parent to have their kid, uhh...you know...for the first time or so.” Ichigo could not stop the blush spreading to his face, unable to full on say it out loud.

Grimmjow hums, nipping his ear before he spoke.

”Trust me, Kurosaki; I am absolutely the last problem ya should worry about right now.”

Ichigo couldn’t help it; he tugged the man down for an intense kiss, which quickly evolved into something more, like it often did at this point. After they were done, Ichigo was cuddled up against the man’s side as he texted his sister again, who’d apparently contacted him while he took a shower. Ichigo enjoyed the soft feeling of fingers combing through his hair absent-mindedly, but even the pleasant lull of the afterglow did not help ease his mind. His dad had meant well, but now he had one more issue plaguing his already troubled mind. Shifting closer to the man, Ichigo could not stop a bit of fear settle in his stomach.

The last thing he wanted to do was fuck this up, but it felt like he was already fucking it up by not progressing with his seizures and stamina, rendering his state volatile.

...................

_You’re too weak; you don’t deserve to even be near someone like him._

_Weakling._

_Stop wasting his time._

 

The voice whispered at him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp.  
> I had zero ideas when I began writing this chapter. I decided to make this a sort of direction-decider for the future, as the plot was sort of stuck and so. The quality therefore might not be as great as with the previous ones, but at least it's hopefully still readable.
> 
> I also really wanted to write about a doubtful Ichigo, because I felt that he WOULD be a little intimidated by the fact this (in this verse) is his first proper relationship, and he happened to pick up a guy who is hot as fuck, and much more experienced in at least the physical aspect of their relationship.   
> It also ties in with the upcoming issues. You'll see, hopefully soon.


	14. Voices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo's state takes a bizarre turn for the worse, and Grimmjow is really angry at him for doing the same thing Nelliel did; not talking to him when he should have.   
> Can't help a loved one if they don't voice out what's wrong.

Days pass.

They train, Ichigo keeps losing.

_Told you you’re weak._

He ignores the voice, goes at it again. He loses.

_Why don’t you just give up?_

There’s another nightmare. He doesn’t even bother waking Grimmjow up, just heads for the bathroom.

The man wakes up regardless, but doesn’t follow him, just waits, wordlessly.

_You’re such a coward, won’t say a word even though he’s worried._

Another match, he loses his cool and lapses again. Grimmjow forces him to the ground and waits until he calms down enough. His heart races in his chest, making him nauseous.

_You’re doing the same thing as his sister. You’re not worth it._

He feels the man hold him in his sleep, nose pressed into his hair. Normally it’s soothing.

Now it’s not.

_Weak._

He knows the blue eyes watch him. They know something is not right, but he can’t find the words. He’s afraid that the voice is right.

If he voices it out, he proves it right.

So he stays quiet.

 

 

 

 

Grimmjow watched the youth struggle to get up, wiping his bloodied nose.

Kurosaki had been unable to block that punch, and it had made him stumble several feet back, clearly making him dizzy. The good sign was that he did not fall to the ground, resuming a fighting stance rather quickly again. His brown eyes were in a deep, fierce frown and he clearly was not happy with himself, of the fact Grimmjow had nearly knocked him to the ground again. If the man was honest with himself, the situation was strange.

Kurosaki had been doing fine before, getting his skill-level higher with each match they’d taken in that park. However, after his first seizure, it was like something was blocking his development.

Grimmjow blocks another kick, and strikes Ichigo in the gut, making him cough and move back, before attempting to swipe the man off his feet. He simply jumps in the air avoiding the kick, and lands his foot square to Ichigo’s chest, meaking him fall backwards as he used him as a sort of skipping stone, leaping into the air as he sent Ichigo to the ground. Grimmjow lands to the grass smoothly like a cat, and stands up, stuffing his hands into his pockets while Ichigo scrambles off the ground, coughing and looking at him with that same mean stare.

He was clearly frustrated.

”Keep a break.” Grimmjow tells him simply, and the youngster huffs, getting off the ground shakily and stomping towards the house, probably to get some water or something.

Grimmjow watches him go, noting that his stamina was finally getting better: Kurosaki was no longer exhausted as long as he used to be, but his strikes were still pathetically weak. Still though...it was not the point of this training. The man could not stop but feel that Ichigo was starting to get fixated on the wrong thing here; whenever he could beat Grimmjow or not did not matter.

It was about the stuff inside his head during the matches.

He had to learn how to control it, when his instincts attempted to overtake him by force and try to make him lash out, or freak out.

Yet...the more they fought, the more it seemed to the man the teen was mainly focusing on trying to get stronger, rather than recognizing the symptoms of Trance and dealing with them. Too many matches ended with him having to force the bastard to the ground as he began to attack blindly, overcome by his own frustration and rage, often injuring himself badly in the process.

There was also the frequent nightmares he refused to speak about now, let alone the moment where it felt like he was fighting with himself, inside his head.

Ichigo would just stop what he was doing and gaze somewhere as if in his thoughts, then shake his head with a frustrated scowl on his lips.

When it came to the dreams, Grimmjow did not even bother going after him anymore once he got out of bed; he’d just wait until the fiery haired youth would come back and cuddle against his side, almost like a sad puppy begging to be petted.

That’s what concerned him too; Ichigo’s temper had gone haywire, making him extremely moody.

He would be pissy after their fights, snap at him for tiniest of reasons, then after settling down from the aftermath of a nightmare, he acted like a wounded dog, in need of care and sympathy. In the morning, he’d be embarrassed about it, even ashamed sometimes, for being so weak. That’s what it boiled down to it seemed. The man sighs as he digs a lighter out of his pocket, lighting a cigarette for himself.

Ichigo clearly was becoming obsessed with the thought that he was somehow weak; he trained excessively, even without Grimmjow, and would be heavily frustrated with himself when he could not handle his fits and succumbed to fear. He did not let Grimmjow comfort himself anymore during those times, stating that he had to learn to handle it alone. He was not entirely wrong with that; Ichigo was the one who would do the biggest mental gymnastics there.

It was just that unlike Grimmjow, he had things to lean on, and it wasn’t really a bad thing to take advantage of if you needed it.

The man lets out a frustrated sigh as he rubs his eyes.

”Bad day huh?”

Grimmjow doesn’t react, just glances at the blond man who’d walked to stand beside him, watching Ichigo come back out and slump to sit down to the porch, drinking from his water bottle with a clearly sulky mood.

”He’s focusing on the wrong fucking thing.” Grimmjow states simply, not looking at the man.

”I’d say throwing water bottles around is not a good way to learn to control a temper.” Shinji agrees as Ichigo indeed throws the empty bottle aside in frustration.

”Fer some reason he seems to think he has ta do things my way. Grow a thick skin and be tough in every aspect.”

Shinji tilts his head so much that his hair hangs over his shoulder, and he lets out a questioning sound. Normally Grimmjow would have wanted to punch him in the fucking face for that stupid ass expression, but he was too concerned for Kurosaki to care.

”I did it the way I did ’cause I had no choice. Kurosaki doesn’t have to be fuckin’ immune to his own fears. Hell, I’m not, even if he seems to think so.”

”Perhaps you should sit Ichi down and talk to him about this.”

Grimmjow snorts, smoking his cigarette.

”If the fucker would just bother to listen; he’s been so much of a pain in the ass that I cannot even tease him anymore without him gettin’ upset or taking it too seriously.”

Still though.

The weird ass cop had a point.

 

 

 

That evening, he sat Ichigo down despite his refusals, as the youngster wanted to go and kick the shit out of the punching bag they had in the side-building for solitary training. He’d protested a lot at first, but then Grimmjow had given him a stare that had silenced Ichigo, making him widen his eyes like a scared child waiting for a scolding. That was another thing Grimmjow was not happy about; how easily Kurosaki became wary of him, or rather, how much he seemed to be scared of upsetting him or something.

His behavior towards the blunette switched between pissy, apologetic and scared, sometimes changing every other minute, it was not normal. 

 

”Kurosaki, you gotta stop doing this.”

”You said that the only way to help me would be to learn how to fight like you.”

”Not exactly like me, dumbass. Stop focusing on getting stronger, it’s not really the point here.”

Ichigo looks at him with a deep frown, clearly not happy with his statement.

”Don’t give me that look, you know I’m right.” Grimmjow huffs and rubs his eyes tiredly.

”Then maybe you should tune down your own actions as well, since apparently I am too weak to handle it.” Ichigo’s tone was biting and he crosses his arms, glaring up at Grimmjow with a positively pissed off face.

Perhaps this had not been the best time to talk about it, given how worked up Kurosaki had been throughout the day. It was too late to take it back now however.

”You could easily handle it if you didn’t constantly drain yourself with this pointless bullshit; why the fuck are you so obsessed about getting stronger anyway?”

Ichigo just stares at him, refusing to answer. Grimmjow sighs and rubs his eyes again, having a hunch on what this was.

”Kurosaki...”

”I don’t wanna hear it!” Ichigo snaps at him suddenly, making the man look at the teen surprised.

Ichigo had stood up, clenching his fists and looking like he wanted to throw shit around and break a window. His brown eyes were glued to him with an angry, defiant look to them.

”I know it’s stupid. I know, you told me last night. But it’s not so easy.” He states, his voice shaking with anger, like the rest of his frame.

”You don’t even try to understand me.” He says almost accusingly, making Grimmjow lift eyebrow at him annoyed.

”The fuck are you on about now?”

Ichigo takes a step closer, all of his muscles tense under his clothing; Grimmjow had never seen the youth this worked up before.

”It must be great to be you, to be so confident with yourself.” Ichigo near spats at him, poking him hard to the chest. Grimmjow stares at Kurosaki baffled, not understanding where this all was coming from.

”You don’t even TRY to understand me, how I feel.”

”I told ya you should not worry about that meaningless crap.”

”It’s NOT meaningless to me!” Ichigo yells at him, making Grimmjow take another step back.

The teen was panting hard now, his eyes burning with fury that the man had no clue where it had come from.

”It’s not...fair. I always feel so useless when I can’t keep up with you. Yeah, maybe it’s stupid, but you can’t just brush things like this off. Maybe an arrogant prick like you has never had to deal with self-esteem issues, but we NORMAL people do. You don’t just...laugh at my face about it and act like it's nothing!”

Grimmjow glares down at him, now getting pissy as well.

”So yer angry at me because I thought you bein’ a self-conscious teen was a little funny?”

”Exaclty! Well, not fully that, but...”

Ichigo releases a deep sigh and rubs his eyes in frustration; it felt almost if he wasn't exactly sure himself why he was so worked up.

”You can’t be this fuckin’ sensitive Kurosaki. I’ve said worse shit to you and you handled it just fine.”

”Back then I wasn’t in love with you!”

Ichigo fires back, trembling with anger. His face was also flushed now, thanks to what he’d just blurted out.

Grimmjow just stares at him with a stoic look, something that clearly irked Ichigo further, as he suddenly attempts to hit the man, who just grabs his fist without even really trying. This seems to spur him on further as Ichigo yanks his arm back and attempts to kick him now, which Grimmjow blocks with ease, looking at the young man with a frown.

Ichigo lets out a frustrated yell and tries to hit him again, this time adding enough strength to his hit that Grimmjow is forced to shove him backwards, stumbling against the coffee table.

”Calm the fuck down Kurosaki.” Grimmjow half-orders him now, getting really tired of the teen’s sudden bitchy attitude.

Ichigo doesn’t even bother listening to him, and just swings at the man with another angry yell, swinging his fists aimlessly. Grimmjow manages to block most of them, but then one lands at his jaw, making him stumble backwards and spit out a bit of blood as he bit his lip. Grimmjow wipes it off and looks at the panting Kurosaki, whose fist had bits of blood in it now.

”What’s the matter? Not used to getting hurt?” Ichigo almost mocks him, with a voice that did not sound quite like himself.

Grimmjow watches him cautiously, and quickly brings his arms up to block another flurry of attacks. Kurosaki was clearly upset enough to want to kick his ass across the house, but that was not what really bothered him; it was clear Ichigo was heading towards another fit, but this one was worse, given the uncharacteristic sneer on the teen’s face, and the laugh as he attempts to hit Grimmjow.

”Why are you backing away? I thought you liked fighting!”

Yeah, something was definitely wrong here.

Grimmjow blocks another punch, noting it had a lot more energy behind it than usual. He manages to grab Ichigo’s wrist and forces him to the ground, knee on his back.

”Settle the fuck down.”

The male beneath struggles against his firm hold and snarls at him, looking a bit like a wild animal. It was very reminiscent of the way he would look like in the ring. What Kurosaki was going trough was clearly another fit, but something felt off about it. As Ichigo keeps struggling against his hold, Grimmjow notes his eyes had gone a little bloodshot. It was a bad sign.

”Kurosaki...”

Suddenly, the younger male lets out a loud scream and actually manages to shrug the taller man off him. He scrambles up, swaying badly as he panted, and his eyes had gone wide and sharp, as if something had spooked him or so. His head was whipping around, and he backs away, as if scared by something. Grimmjow recognizes the look he had from the time he’d first sprinted off the other day.

”Kurosaki?”

He takes a step closer, but the wide eyed male backs away, and then sprints out of the door, forcing Grimmjow to follow.

The situation, while familiar, was strange; having the teen suddenly turn terrified did not make sense, as these types of fits were not triggered by anger usually.

Plus, the bloodshot eyes, Grimmjow had seen that before, it was not a good sign.

Ichigo had managed to reach the edge of the forest, and the blue haired male speeds up, knowing he had to catch him before he hurt himself.

The problem was, the lovable shithead was fast when spooked.

 

 

 

Ichigo was running away, not really knowing from what. He just kept running, absolutely terrified.

There was this distant mad cackling ringing in his ears, a voice that vaguely reminded his own.

_See? Now you’ve angered your white furry beast. You’re so weak._

Ichigo covers his ears, telling the voice to shut up. He suddenly hits a branch and stumbles down a hill, hitting to the ground hard. As he scrambles up, Ichigo feels something sticky on his head; he’d hit a rock and his head was bleeding now from the wound.

The young male just stares at the red substance in his hand.

Red So much red around him.

He began to feel sick to his stomach, and the voice became louder.

_Why are you so spooked? You love doing that, and you know it!_

”No! Shut up!”

_You cracked those guys’ skulls open with glee, or did you perhaps forget that?_

”I didn’t mean to! Shut up!”

The laughter became louder, drowning out any other noises.

_Come on, Ichigo, you can do better than that; we both know what he wants. Or are you really too weak to give it to him?_

Wanting to make the voice stop, Ichigo smacks his head against the ground, smearing his blood to the grass.

His entire body felt like it was burning, shaking apart and disintegrating at the same time.

He could not see anything clearly anymore, just red, lots of red and black.

_Let's stop this pathetic dance you've been doing, just let it loose, trust me._

 

Suddenly, something grabs him, and the teen struggles with a panicked whimper, trying to ward off whoever it was that tried to get a hold of him.

Except, then he saw blue.

Blue and white in the midst of all the red.

”Ichigo, you gotta calm down, you’re injured.” The soothing voice coaxes him to rest against something warm, and his vision filled with more white.

It was the panther. His panther.

He did not sound angry like the voice claimed.

Ichigo whimpers again, his hands shaky, uselessly trying to grasp, to hold onto something, clawing the grass and then finally clutching the white canvas of Grimmjow’s hoodie he wore right now, getting some red stains on it from the blood on his fingers.

”C’mon. Settle down will ya?” The low tone spoke into his ear, with a warm touch gently caressing his back, sliding down his spine in a slow, soothing motion, over and over.

Warm, it was so warm, being held like that.

Ichigo’s mind began to turn drowsy, and he slumps against the blue haired man, all energy taken out of him all of a sudden.

”White and blue...I like it.” He mumbles before passing out, making Grimmjow ponder just what the hell that was about.

 

 

 

Grimmjow watches the young man sleep, having tended his head injury.

His breathing was now level again and the heartbeat was normal.

Still, he could not shake off from his mind what he’d seen in the forest earlier; the kid had been talking to himself, switching between a strange maniacal laughter to a scared, whimpering child-state. He had seen this before, but never thought it could start happening so fast after the teen’s enhancements first began to take a toll on him.

The man sighs and rubs his eyes, glancing out of the window.

He notes that the blond weirdo officer was heading there again, carrying another grocery bag with him, probably filled with those sickly sweet, sugary drinks. Grimmjow heads outside, and the blond officer is surprised to see the usually irritated blunette come to greet him instead of Ichigo.

”So did you end up killing him during a match now?”

Grimmjow had no fucking clue what this weirdo’s deal was, and right now he didn’t give a shit.

”He had a bad fit: he’s out cold. I need ’ta call yer boss.”

Shinji blinks slowly, just staring at the man dully, who restrains himself from smacking that stupid ass face to the floor. Instead, he just stares at the man seriously, waiting for his slow brain to get the hint.

”You got the phone for your sister.”

”Fer my sister. I doubt he’s around her 24/7.”

Shinji hums, then digs out his cell, and dials a number.

”Hey, it’s me. Our grumpy-cat says he needs to talk to you about Ichi.”

After a moment, the man hands the phone to Grimmjow, who is greeted by the familiar gentle tone of Ukitake, who inquires him on what was going on.

”Kurosaki had a serious fit today, beyond normal. The fucker started hitting his head to the ground, talking to himself.” The man on the other end goes quiet, clearly processing the information.

”I’m serious; this ain’t no longer just about him learning ta control his impulses. There’s clearly something fucked up going inside his head, and I cannot bloody help with that.”

Ukitake sighs at the other end, clearly not happy with the situation.

_”Are you absolutely sure this is more serious than what you expected?”_

”The bastard fuckin’ bitched at me over some crap, then sprints outta the door like he thinks I’m gonna kill ’im. By the time I find the slippery little shit, he’s talkin ta himself and trying to bust his skull open. No, this ain’t something somebody of his current level should be experiencing.”

Grimmjow near growls at the man then sucks in a deep breath.

”This is what that crazy asshole Aaroniero did, before he went to cardiac arrest just a few weeks later.”

Grimmjow’s tone is chilly, and he knew all too well the meaning behind his words. Even the usually stoic blonde who’d been listening to their conversation suddenly gains some life to his expression and looks concerned for once.

_”.....I see. I’ll have to discuss about this with Urahara-san and his father.”_

”You ain’t got time fer that shit. If this is what I think it is, he might go and drop dead faster than you can blink an eye; one emotional outburst too much, and his heart may give out on him.” The man tells him seriously, his blue eyes in a deep, frustrated frown. It was sort of like Nel all over again; somebody he cared for was trying to kick the bucket, and again, the bastard had not told him everything he should have.

Grimmjow knew. There was no way Kurosaki just suddenly began to talk to himself.

Aaroniero had spoken of the ’voices’ for months, before his first serious fit. First and last, in that case. The bastard had dropped dead afterwards.

Grimmjow huffs and strikes his fist against the wooden wall, cracking it and startling Shinji, who nearly falls on his butt to the ground as he hears the sound.

_”I understand why you are so angry, Jeagerjaquez-san. We just do not have a miracle cure for this right now, for you know about it the most out of all of us.”_

”I fucking know!”

The man growls, brushing his palm over his face and then through his hair.

He then takes in another breath, trying to calm down as he spots the familiar redness on the edges of his vision; the man knew he was getting too worked up. Going into a bloody frenzy was not a good option right now.

”Fuck, talk to Tia about it. She should know almost as much as me.”

_”Very well, I believe that is a good option. In the meantime, I recommend post-phoning your training with him. Try to keep him calm as I believe that should help.”_

”Easy for you to fucking say, the kid’s getting upset over tiny things now.”

Ukitake hums at that, smiling a little.

_”Well he is younger than you, and less knowledgeable with life. Especially right now, he needs guidance and support from somebody more experienced.”_

Grimmjow snorts at that; he was not exactly a mentoring type. Then again, that’s what he’d been doing a lot, lately.

”You gotta figure something out, and fast. I can’t help him fight enemies within his own brain.”

_”I assure you; we are determined to do exactly that.”_

 

Once the call ends, Grimmjow barely manages to not break the phone and throws it at Shinji, who manages to catch it eventually, after bouncing it a few times in his hands like it was a hot potato

. ”Watch after Kurosaki, I’m going fer a walk.”

”You should not leave the area for too long.” Shinji informs him, but doesn’t stop the man, valuing his life too much. Grimmjow looked positively murderous right now.

 

 

Once Ichigo began to stir, he noted he was in their bed, and he felt dizzy.

Second thing he noted was Shinji, who was sitting beside him on a chair, leaning over Ichigo and poking his forehead.

”You alive?”

Ichigo swats his hand away and rubs his eyes with a sigh.

His head hurt pretty bad, and as he touched it, there was a bandage around it.

”What....where’s...?”

”You apparently freaked out. Your boyfriend went out to blow off some steam.”

Ichigo first felt color creep up on his face at the ’boyfriend’ part, and then he goes pale as he starts recalling what happened, let alone the implications of Shinji’s last words.

”Oh god...he’s gonna kill me...” Ichigo huffs and hides his face into his palms.

”He did look like he wanted to murder someone, but why would that be you?”

”Because....this is like with his sister. I’m being a burden.

” Ichigo sighs, slumping his arms against the bed as he stared at the ceiling. Why the hell did all this happen?

”So....uhh...based on the conversation he had with Ukitake-san, you might wanna take it easy from now on unless you want your heart to explode or something.”

Ichigo felt dread creep up his spine; that did not sound good at all. He places his hand against his chest reflexively, almost if wanting to check that his heart was still beating. It indeed was, the pace elevated slightly right now.

 

The door opens rather loudly, and Grimmjow steps in now, soaked as it had begun to rain outside. He notes Ichigo is awake but ignores him for now, heading straight for the shower. Shinji had not been kidding; there was clear murder in those blue eyes, although it seemed like the man himself did not know where to aim it.

”I brought you more food and soda. Also your sister sent you this.” Shinji hands him a drawing Yuzu had made, alongside a simple letter. The drawing had their family in it, and it made Ichigo smile lightly, easing his fastened heartbeat.

Eventually though, as he heard the shower stop running, it fastened again, and Ichigo actually felt scared now.

Shinji lifts eyebrow a little at that, then turns to look at Grimmjow who steps out of the shower, drying his hair, still dead silent. He was so mad right now, Ichigo could tell, and it made him swallow down hardly. He’d never meant to become another burden to worry about; Grimmjow had said it himself, they had to be worth it, and right now, Ichigo was sure the man was questioning if he was that.

”.....I feel I should leave you guys to chat, but I’m a little concerned for Ichi right now.” Shinji comments, and Grimmjow turns to look at them, a stoic expression on his face.

”You ain’t gonna hurt him are ya?” There was hidden stealth in Shinji’s tone, and the vibe he was giving, it was the first time he actually felt like somebody dangerous, or at least somebody to be taken seriously.

If Grimmjow picked up on that, he did not show it.

They stare at each other for what seems like an eternity, but eventually Shinji gets up and wipes his clothes from the nonexistent dust. ”I’ll be back tomorrow. I’m sure Ukitake got some ideas by then.”

Again, his tone was more serious and slightly less monotonic like it usually was.

Grimmjow just nods, and watches the man leave, tugging on his hat and hurrying to the car he’d come with to escape the rain. Ichigo remains quiet, watching at Grimmjow cautiously, who keeps gazing out of the window, watching Shinji drive away. Eventually, he walks towards the bed and sits down at the other end. Not slumping, but purposefully sitting down, every movement pre-planned like he was some sort of giant, gracious cat.

A panther.

For a moment, it was quiet as neither of them spoke. …

………..

”Do you have any idea how bad I wanna smack you right now?”

Ichigo would have preferred if he sounded mad; Grimmjow’s tone was absolutely blank, no emotion in it whatsoever. It was scarier than his anger. He just nods, unable to say anything as he fidgeted with the edge of the blanket nervously.

”You should’ve told me you heard voices.”

Ichigo blinks, looking at the man surprised who just looks at him with an eerily familiar, tired look.

”Don’t shit with me Kurosaki; I’ve seen this happen before. You oughta have had crap going on inside your brain before this whole situation got triggered.”

His voice was calm, soo eerily calm that it made Ichigo’s skin crawl.

”I...I’m...”

Grimmjow just gives him a look, silencing the youth, who swallows down hard, waiting for what the man was going to say or do next.

Without a word, the blunette shifts closer and grasps the back of his neck, mingling his fingers into the soft hair and holding onto it firmly, gaining Ichigo’s full attention. Not that he’d been focusing on anything else in the first place.

”Why is it, that you always fucking hide shit from me?” Grimmjow mutters, rubbing the soft skin almost subconsciously, gaze drifting aside for a moment.

Ichigo knew what he was referring to; Nelliel had not informed her brother of her plans before it was too late and she got hurt. Now, Ichigo had not told him everything, and here they were. It made him feel like shit.

”Sometimes it feels like none of ya really trust me.”

Ichigo felt his chest tighten, and he manages to lift his hand to press it against Grimmjow’s cheek, making the man turn his gaze back at him.

”We do. Nel does, and I do too.”

”Then why the fuck do you not talk to me? I can't help ya if I don't know what the hell is going on.”

There was almost accusing tone to his voice, and he looks at Ichigo with that same, tired look he often wore back then when they first began to interact. It was awful to see that expression on his face again.

”I know I can be pretty shitty person if I want to. I don’t do emotions that well, but I’m fucking trying alright?” Grimmjow huffs, leaning slightly against the hand held on his cheek.

”I don’t really think you’re shitty.” Ichigo states sincerely, gaining a snort from Grimmjow as his blue eyes focus on him again.

”Don’t kid yourself, Kurosaki. Decent people don’t kick others in the nuts for fun.”

Ichigo makes a face, knowing he could not dispute that.

The man smirks at that a little, but turns back serious fairly quickly.

”Look. Maybe I shoulda not have laughed at you for being doubtful, I give you that. I just honestly thought yer worrying over nothing.”

”It’s...okay. I was acting like a baby anyway.” Ichigo comments quietly, not wanting to even go into his silly outburst right now. It was not the issue here really.

Grimmjow remains quiet and just gazes at him tiredly, long enough to make Ichigo fidget uneasily.

”I’m sorry. I should have told you. I just...I did not think it was something serious, just my own silly uneasiness.” The young male explains, biting his lip unsure.

”Hearing voices in yer head is usually serious.”

”I did not think it was a case like that.”

Grimmjow huffs and rubs his eyes, he looked so mentally exhausted right now that Ichigo felt a huge urge to comfort him, despite the fact he was the one that likely needed comforting after his ordeal. Ichigo is too afraid to do anything however, knowing Grimmjow was angry at him even if he didn’t show it.

”Really. I’m sorry. Not only about not telling you about this.”

Grimmjow gazes at him for a moment, knowing full well what Kurosaki was referring to.

 

_Sorry that I hurt myself like that._

_Sorry that I did not tell you about this._

_Sorry that I’m making you worry, like Nelliel did._

_I’m sorry that I might be on the verge of death right now._

 

 

”Sorry ain’t _fuckin’_ enough, Kurosaki.”

Ichigo felt cold grip his heart; those were the words he’d told Nel on that day, moments before collapsing in a pile of mentally exhausted heap. It was only natural the man would be feeling something like that right now; just because he’d been doing better, it did not mean the pain wasn’t there. Ichigo had just torn open the wound he’d thought he’d helped to heal at least somewhat.

The orange haired male feels his eyes start prickling, and he pulls his hand away, holding it against his chest as his body shook.

Ichigo turns his gaze down, biting his lip as he tried not to start crying. It would not help with anything.

He feels the man shift and lie down, tugging his trembling form under his chin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders with a sigh. It was what he’d done with Nel, because no matter how angry and upset he would be towards his sister, he was not going to walk away from her.

The same applied to Ichigo now.

He was angry about the situation, but knew all too well that bitching at the teen would just make things worse.

So, he just lets Ichigo silently sob against him, caressing the orange patch of hair with his fingers while gazing out into the rain behind the window. Eventually, the teen calms down, but he doesn’t move, pressing his head and hands against Grimmjow’s warm chest.

”That weirdo’s gonna come back tomorrow, and hopefully Ukitake has a plan on what to do from now on. I can’t keep having matches with you now, it’s too risky.” Grimmjow tells the teen with a firm tone, sounding almost parenting.

It was weird, aimed towards somebody else than Nel, but he knew he had to get the message across while not upsetting Ichigo further.

The younger male just nods, his body tense all over.

Grimmjow sighs and presses his lips against the soft, orange fluff, just holding them against Ichigo’s scalp for a moment. The touch eventually makes the young male relax a little, releasing a small sigh.

”Next time your head starts doing something weird, just fucking talk to me.”

He near orders and Ichigo nods again, still unable to speak.

They lie there like that for a long while, up until Ichigo slips into slumber again, still exhausted from his ordeal. Grimmjow doesn’t move from his spot, knowing that leaving him alone right now could potentially trigger another fit, as it was clear Ichigo felt safer if he was close by.

”A white panther huh?” He comments quietly, still gazing out of the window while holding onto the sleeping youth.

 

Ichigo did not have any nightmares that night; all he dreamed off was a large white feline he was resting against, cuddling into the soft fur with a pleased sigh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah. I managed to write this one fairly quickly.   
> I'm really on shaky grounds right now with the plot, sort of trying to feel where it should go as I hadn't planned this far ahead, given I pretty much changed the storyline mid-way of writing this fic.   
> Grimmjow is really starting to come off like an exhausted parent right now.   
> It's slightly ooc honestly, but given the setting and the story, I think it fits. Having him be the utter violent maniac dick here would not serve the story very well.


	15. Solution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Urahara comes for a visit with a potential plan to help Ichigo.  
> Grimmjow is still pissy but caps it in for now.

He’d been the first to witness it.

Aaroniero had not shown up to the morning training, so they’d been told to go look for the bastard. Grimmjow had had no interest in it, but you didn’t say no to their bosses, so he went anyway. He’d found him. The crazy little shit had been hiding in a broom closet, talking to himself with mad glint in his eyes. As Grimmjow approached him, ready to drag his sorry ass out of the dusty room, the fucker had hit him and sprinted out running away like a devil was after him.

He’d began to attack people blindly, whoever got in his way. Several weaker ones ended up badly hurt, unable to stand his strength. In the end, Grimmjow had managed to tackle him to the ground. Aaroniero had struggled, spat at his face and snarled like a rabid dog, then had started to bang his head to the ground, until it bled. He’d managed to make him stop with Yammy’s help, who held the freaked out male’s head to the ground so he couldn’t move it, while few went to look for a superior.

That’s when it happened.

Aaroniero had suddenly gotten a huge burst of energy into his body, shrugging both usually far stronger fighters off him. He’d stood there, laughing, staring into the skies while tugging onto his bloodied hair. Then, he’d suddenly stopped, coughed out blood, and crumbled to the floor. By the time one of their superiors reached the site, Aaroniero was dead.

He’d had a stroke.

That day stuck in many metahuman children’s mind for a long time; all of them afraid that they’d end up going through the same thing. Many did. Grimmjow got lucky; despite his tendency for Trances, his body never tipped the scale the same way. His modified genetics worked near perfectly compared to several others.

Not that he cared.

He did not care about being perfect.

He just wanted to not die a dog’s death, because that was pathetic. He needed to survive, to protect that what mattered; the green haired, wide eyed girl who’d stumbled into the orphanage with him years ago, refusing to let go of his hand. It felt so long ago, but despite everything, things hadn’t changed. Nel still clung to him for comfort and safety, she still made sure to keep her perceived brother sane in the midst of all the chaos.

Then, it all had gone to shit.

And now... He was that angry, frustrated young teen again, watching as somebody he cared for was getting hurt, and he couldn’t do much about it despite his strength.

Grimmjow wanted to yell, to scream, to break something.

He held it all in as he watched Ichigo slumber, sitting at the feet-end of the bed as he couldn’t sleep.

Trashing out would just make everything worse.

The orange haired male shifts in his sleep, sensing that Grimmjow was no longer resting beside him. The man reaches out and lifts his feet into his lap, gently caressing the soft skin there. Ichigo relaxes instantly as he feels the touch, likely feeling safer knowing he was still nearby. It had always been bizarre in a sense: that there were people who found safety in his presence, despite how violently brutal and temperamental he was. Then again, these were the people who knew him better than just the cold crack he wore. After a while, Ichigo shifts again, face in a frown.

He makes out a slightly uneasy noise in his sleep, pulling his legs in and trying to hide under the bedsheets.

Grimmjow sighs and moves back beside Ichigo, who instantly cuddles against him, almost clutching onto his shirt. It was pathetic; it was nothing like the fiery yet kind young man he’d first met. Kurosaki was not supposed to be like a scared little kid, trying to hide against him. He was supposed to be braver than this. Everybody had their weak moments, but this was beyond normal, and Grimmjow hated it.

He would not turn Kurosaki down if he needed support however.

That would not help anything. The blunette sighs and grasps Ichigo’s hand, holding it against his chest so the teen could feel his heartbeat. He also leans his head against the orange tuft on top of Ichigo’s head, breathing in and out deeply, until Ichigo’s slightly panicked breaths began to match the rhythm.

Eventually, he was in a deep sleep again.

 

 

The morning was tense.

Ichigo felt uneasy and shaky from the start, preferring to stay nearby Grimmjow, preferably physically touching him. It felt like the youth thought he’d go into another seizure if he’d let go. Grimmjow said nothing to it, allowing Ichigo to remain close. They sat on the couch, watching the TV in silence. The fiery haired male was cuddled up against Grimmjow’s side, head resting on his shoulder. They had not spoken a word since waking up. It felt a bit like both of them did not know what to say, nor do, so they waited. They waited for Shinji to arrive with hopefully an idea from Ukitake on what to do next.

Eventually however, the silence is too much to bear.

”What is Ukitake-san going to do?” Ichigo muses out, voice so quiet it was barely above a whisper.

The man remains quiet, drinking from the mug he had his coffee on. His silence seemed to bother Ichigo, as he looks up at him with a look reminiscent of a sad puppy again.

”Dunno.” Grimmjow answers gruffly.

He was still pretty pissy about the shit Kurosaki had pulled on him, and he did not want to risk yelling at the teen.

Ichigo could tell, as he fell silent again, just leaning his head back against the shoulder with a sigh. After a while of watching some random documentary, the man releases a slow sigh, sensing that Ichigo was still uneasy due to him stone-walling him.

”Look. I don’t wanna talk right now, ’cause I think I might yell at you.”

”I’m sorry.” It came out like a reflex, and Grimmjow rubs his eyes with an annoyed huff.

”Just...gimme a moment. I need to get my nerves in check before I deal with you properly.” He states, shifting to get up and bring his lukewarm coffee to the sink, not wanting to drink it.

Ichigo watches after him with an upset look, but could understand why Grimmjow was being cold right now.

He was worried, and Ichigo knew the man well enough to know that his first reaction to worry tended to be anger and aggression, something that was not needed right now. The young male watches as Grimmjow puts the cup away, turning off the coffee-maker and pouring the leftovers down the sink, before placing it back rather harshly, the sound making Ichigo jump.

The man huffs, sounding irritated, and he shoves a chair out of his way as he walks to the bedroom, probably to change from the clothes he’d worn since yesterday. After a moment, Ichigo could hear something falling, and a litany of curses before something gets thrown against a wall. Cautiously, Ichigo gets off the couch and creeps towards the bedroom, peeking from the doorway.

He finds the man standing in the middle of the room, muscles tense and clenching his fists, staring at the chair he’d kicked against the wall, breaking it.

There was a pile of clothes and turned over basket they’d been in at the closet that was wide open, indicating he’d tried to reach for the basket and it had fallen on him, triggering the violent reaction. Grimmjow’s back was turned to Ichigo, and he was currently shirtless, the tattoos on his back at full view. Ichigo bites his lip and inches closer, placing his palm against the man’s back.

Grimmjow doesn’t react, just stares at the chair he’d just broken, his chest heaving from angry breaths.

Cautiously, Ichigo brings his arms around the man, placing his palm above the fast beating heart, while other one settles around Grimmjow’s waist. He presses his head on his shoulder, closing his eyes and just standing there, waiting. Slowly, the heartbeat under his palm begins to calm and the blue haired male leans back against him slightly, releasing a slow sigh.

”think of the bright side; at least Nel is doing better now.” Ichigo comments softly, petting the warm skin beneath his palm idly with his thumb.

Grimmjow says nothing, just lifts his hand to cover Ichigo’s one on his waist. The action makes the younger male smile, and he moves his head lightly to press a soft kiss on Grimmjow’s shoulder.

”Yeah. I suppose.” He muses, his voice sounding tired.

 

 

 

 

Shinji did show up eventually, though he did not come alone; Ichigo was surprised to see Urahara there, and he did not come alone.

A dark skinned woman with dark purple hair flashed a smirk at Ichigo as she followed the man into the cabin. Grimmjow doesn’t seem surprised, and given the slight nod he gave the woman, Ichigo assumes he’d met her before.

”Good to see you Kurosaki-san.” Urahara greets him with a tilt of a hat, smiling as usual, although there was weight in his eyes. The man clearly had not slept in a while.

”Why are you here? Who’s this woman?”

”Aww, you won’t even introduce me, Jeagerjaquez? Or did you forget my face already?” The woman near purrs with a smirk, gaining an eye roll from the man, who lights himself a cigarette. Ichigo was fairly sure they were almost out of those by now; Grimmjow smoked like chimney.

”Her name’s Yoruichi. She’s from the Special unit. Deals with the most dangerous and secretive stuff.”

The fiery haired male blinks and looks at him confused; how would Grimmjow know of any of that?

”She was one of the folks I met after I rescued Nel.” The blue haired male shrugs, blowing smoke out of his lungs.

Ichigo just nods, and turns back to look at Urahara and the woman, who’d sat down to the kitchen table, gesturing Ichigo to sit down as well. Shinji remained on the living room, sitting on the couch and watching Tv with a sweet soda in his hand. While he seemed disinterested, the man was listening to the conversation closely. Grimmjow paces to the kitchen too, hands in his pockets, but remains standing beside Ichigo. It was again that almost guarding stance, the one Ichigo recalled from when he first learned of his origins’ hidden details.

”Ukitake-san ran us down on the details. You sure have gotten yourself into a pinch, haven’t you Ichigo?” The woman comments; she was still smiling, but there was a level of seriousness to her voice.

The young male just nods, not really knowing what else to do or say.

The golden eyes drift up to the smoking male beside him.

”I have to say; I still find it surprising to see you this protective of somebody other than your sister.” It was in no way mocking or skeptical statement. If anything Yoruichi seemed glad to witness this.

Grimmjow just shrugs and mingles his fingers into Ichigo’s hair at the back of his neck, making him blush lightly.

”Shit happens. So far he’s been worth it; though I'm still gonna kick his ass for the shit he pulled once he's not in danger of having a heart-attack or something.”

The woman hums, an amused glint on her eyes, but she soon turns serious again as her focus falls back on Ichigo, who felt awkward about Grimmjow touching him like that in front of others.

”To my understanding, the original idea was to both keep you away from Aizen’s hands, and have Jeagerjaquez help you to learn how to control these changes in your body, correct?”

Ichigo just nods.

”That plan went outta window now; I cannot really teach him anymore ’cause if his adrenaline level spikes too much, he’ll have a freak out or a stroke.”

”I am not entirely sure how beating him up is teaching him.”

Yoruichi points out with an amused smile, although she knew full well what was the point behind it; in order for metahuman to learn to control and maintain themselves like Grimmjow, they had to learn how to fight a certain way. They were made to be soldiers after all.

”So? What are we gonna do now?”

Urahara, who’d been quiet for the most part, sighs and puts his hat away, looking at Ichigo too now with a serious frown.

”Truth to be told. I’ve been working on a...’cure’ of sorts that could perhaps negate metahuman genes. The original idea was to counter against Aizen’s lab-rats in case any of them did end up working under some seriously bad people.”

Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that.

”I thought you were just a former cop turned a shop owner.”

”There are a lot of things you do not know about me.” Urahara comments with a mysterious smile. Ichigo decides not to ask.

Urahara Kisuke had always had his mysteries anyway.

”So yer saying this cure may help ’im?”

The sand blond haired male sighs and rubs his eyes, before crossing his fingers together.

”In a normal case, perhaps. The problem is, Kurosaki-san did not receive his genetics via injection like you. He was born with them. We do not know exactly how he would react to it. For all we know, he could even die.”

The fiery haired male went pale as he heard that, and Ichigo could feel Grimmjow’s grip on his hair tighten slightly. The man remains stoic however.

”In truth, we’ve only tested the serum on few weaker-level soldiers, so we do not know of it worls fully at all, given all but one had complications.” Grimmjow snorts and his expression turn slightly hostile now.

”So you forced your miracle juice on people? That’s classy of ya.”

”Kisuke did not force anybody! Those guys agreed to do it; they wanted to make their mind settle down!” Yoruichi rushes to defend the man, but Urahara just keeps a hand up, signaling that it was fine.

Grimmjow had every right to remain skeptic, given they were discussing about something that could be used against him too.

”We believe the reason why it did not work so well, was because those who tested it did not have significant enough changes for their genetics. We’d need somebody stronger than that to test it for.”

Ichigo began to realize what the man was hinting at, and he looks up at Grimmjow worried, who had an unimpressed glare on his face.

”So you want me to be yer lab rat now?”

”Not exactly; all we’d really need is some of your DNA to test the serum on; a blood sample for example would suffice.”

Grimmjow drags in a big breath of smoke and blows it out, remaining quiet for a moment.

”You’d need a lotta of it to see proper effects.” The man points out, gaining a sheepish smile from Urahara, who rubs his head awkwardly.

”...Yes. In all likeness you’d need a blood transfusion to replace it. Even you cannot quite handle such a loss.”

”Won’t that weaken him though? I mean...if you replace his superhuman blood with normal...” Ichigo asks cautiously, voice laced with concern.

”It’s in the genetics all over my body, dumbass, not just my blood. I’ve lost a lot of it in fights.” Grimmjow grunts at him, making Ichigo turn quiet again.

”The problem is, mine’s a rare type.” The blunette huffs and rubs his eyes.

”Indeed. We could have asked Nelliel-san for the donation as well, but given her current state, it felt more reasonable to ask you.”

Grimmjow remains quiet for a while again, smoking his cigarette. The blue eyes drift down at Ichigo who looks up at him with wide, concerned look. It was ridiculous for the man, honestly. Kurosaki was the one whose life was in danger, not his. At the same time, his worry was endearing.

”So. Even if that shit works when it comes to my blood, how can you guarantee it’ll help Ichigo.” It was a question Urahara had expected, and he smiles.

”If we manage to neutralize the bits that give you superhuman abilities, in all likeness we’ll be able to just target those genetics in Kurosaki-san.”

”So you wanna nuke the whole metahuman deal from him completely?”

Urahara pauses and turns to look at Ichigo, who soon realizes they wanted to hear his thoughts on it. The teen looks down at his hands and thinks about it for a moment. So far, all his so-called inhuman genes had done was causing him trouble. ”I don’t really need them.” He finally sighs, dropping his hands to his lap as he looks up at Urahara with a determined look.

”If you can get rid of all of it and just make me a normal human, that’s fine.”

Urahara nods, and looks back up at Grimmjow, noting there was a slight smile on the man’s lips as he looks down at Ichigo. The blue haired male had changed quite a bit from the angry and fierce teen he’d once been. The flare was still there, but it was more controlled, and he no longer limited his care towards one person only.

”So, I assume you got a donor in mind, or got the replacement blood in storage already. I doubt you’d bring this up otherwise.”

Urahara nods and turns to look at Yoruichi, who smirks at him.

”Apparently ours is a match. Sure we got some in storage in the Hospital, but we can start out with mine.”

Grimmjow snorts, rolling his eyes. He was not surprised. There was something about the woman that was similar to him. They both could be fierce and scary, as well as playful if they wanted to. Yoruichi just preferred to be playful as her default state, whereas Grimmjow often leaned towards scary-as-fuck.

”I believe three sessions should give me enough for testing. Yoruichi agreed to do the first one, but the next two may need to be carried out by the hospital reserves, as unlike you, she is still very much a normal human, and cannot handle blood loss as well. She does not regenerate it as quickly as you.”

Grimmjow lifts eyebrow at that. ”You call her an average human?”

Yoruichi’s grin widens at that. ”See, somebody sees it Kisuke!”

The man just rubs his head with an awkward laugh, wondering if this was a good idea after all.

”Are you going to do the transfusion in a local hospital?”

Urahara shakes his head at Ichigo’s question.

”We have small private quarters in the place Nelliel-San is currently staying. We decided we should bring you two there instead now.”

Ichigo nods a smile creeping up his lips; he honestly wanted to see the green haired woman again, and based on the light shift on Grimmjow’s expression, so did he. ”We’ll be leaving tomorrow; you two might wanna get prepared and gather up your things as Shuuhei will come and pick you two up the next morning.” Yoruichi tells the two, a playful smirk on her face

”So make the time count.”

Ichigo splutters, feeling his cheeks heat up, but Grimmjow just rolls his eyes at the woman, an equal grin on his lips now.

 

 

The two head back out after discussing few more details with Grimmjow, and they head to the car Shinji had brought them in. The blond nods at Ichigo, before stepping in on the driver’s seat and heading off.

”Honestly, I don’t get the point of that moron’s presence at all.” Grimmjow huffs after a moment.

”Just in case; I guess we’ve gotten lucky that nothing happened so far as we’ve been here...nothing he should deal with I mean.” Ichigo concludes with a shrug.

He still wasn’t sure what he thought of Hirako Shinji; the man seemed alright, but he did not seem like a competent officer. Then again, that was likely the point if he was supposed to be some sort of undercover man. Ichigo had never really asked if he was doing undercover stuff right now. He assumed no, given how often the man had visited.

”...Are you sure about this?” He asks after a moment of silence, turning to look at Grimmjow with concern still in his eyes. The man snorts and looks at him with half-closed eyelids.

”It’s just a blood transfusion. I’m not the one whose head is a beehive.”

”I know...I just...Urahara made it sound kind of a big deal.”

Grimmjow sighs and rubs his head, dropping his cigarette to the ground and turning it off with his foot.

”There’s always a risk when it comes to metahuman blood; if it ends up in the wrong hands, who knows what you can do with it.”

”But...isn’t the only person who could use it the one who created it?”

The blunette says nothing, just tugs him closer and nuzzles his hair for a bit. A strangely out of blue gesture, but Ichigo did not mind it one bit.

”Aizen may be the bastard who made the first version, but there are plenty of folk who’d love to learn the formula.”

Ah, that made sense.

”....Are you still spitting mad at me?” He dares to ask while Grimmjow kept his nose pressed in his hair.

The man snorts but doesn’t move, his arm around Ichigo tugging the younger male closer. ”Trust me, if your state was not so volatile, I would’ve whooped your ass across the forest already.” Grimmjow’s words were harsh, but there was a hint of humor in his tone.

He was clearly feeling a bit easier now that they had a plan of action.

Ichigo turns to rest his head on Grimmjow’s chest, releasing a slow sigh. For a moment they just stood there, with the taller man caressing his hair and back, and Ichigo could not stop but smile lightly at the touch. He felt shaky and uneasy if he was honest, but Grimmjow’s presence brought him this strange sense of security. It was kind of weird, given it was not like the man could magically whisk his problems away. Ichigo’s brain just seemed to associate him with safety for some reason.

 

Suddenly, there was a loud sound, and Ichigo jumps, his heart beating in his chest.

Grimmjow looks up and curses under his breath; it had begun to rain, and based on the rumble, a thunderstorm was heading their way.

”Don’t let go.”

He instructs Ichigo with a low and firm tone, and the teen doesn’t protest, his body tense all over as Grimmjow coaxes him back in the cabin, holding him close with a firm grip. He brings Ichigo to the bed, wrapping him in several layers of blankets.

The man then tugs the curtains in front of the window, hiding the rain from sight. Ichigo curls up a bit, feeling how his body was still tense, his nerves on the edge. It was stronger reaction than what it should be, but not as bad as the time he’d sprinted out in the rain. Ichigo now knew what to expect, so he just sat there and watched as Grimmjow heads to the kitchen and makes him some tea.

The teen flinches as another lightning strikes outside, and keeps his gaze at Grimmjow, knowing it helped him to not descend into panic.

Eventually, Grimmjow enters the room and closes the door behind him, likely a precaution in case Ichigo would bolt; his pathway was obstructed, which would make it easier for Grimmjow to stop him if needed. He hands Ichigo the cup wordlessly, before sitting at the feet end of the bed. He proceeds to lift Ichigo’s feet into his lap like he’d done at night, and gently rubs them, helping the tense youth to slowly take his mind away from the thunder outside. The two remain quiet, with Ichigo drinking his tea while Grimmjow massaged his legs. It was working fairly well, as the youth soon found himself drifting away, barely registering the occasional rumble outside.

”Did you do this kind of thing for Nel too to keep her calm?” It was kind of an out-of-blue question, but Ichigo was curious.

Grimmjow hums, not lifting his gaze from his task at hand, literally.

”Not exactly. She’d just use me as a fuckin’ pillow and ask me to pet her hair.”

The man snorts, but there was fondness in his tone, indicating the man did not really mind it.

”Well, I don’t blame her; you are a very comfy pillow.” Ichigo teases Grimmjow, who rolls his eyes, tickling Ichigo’s foot now until the teen was wheezing from laughter, begging him to stop. He’d spilled his tea to the bedsheets too, but neither seemed to care about it. Grimmjow shifts upwards now, grabbing the almost empty mug and putting it to the nightstand, before resting his weight on Ichigo, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning his head on them.

”You’re heavy.” Ichigo complains halfheartedly, a hand already reaching to mingle into the blue hair.

Grimmjow just smirks at him, resting more of his bodyweight on Ichigo.

”Now you know how I feel, havin’ all of ya draping yourselves all over me. It’s a pain in the ass.”

”I seriously doubt we weigh anything to you, unless I’ve mistaken all that muscle for fat.”

Grimmjow snickers at his jab, shifting up a bit to press a quick kiss on Ichigo’s lips, making him smile.

”Yer a feather. Nel’s heavy as fuck.”

”You so don’t wanna tell her that. You generally don’t comment on women’s weight.”

”She’s my sister so it don’t count. ’Sides most of it is in her boobs anyway.”

Ichigo stares at him blankly for a moment, and then bursts into such laughter that once he was done, his eyes were watery and his breathing was wheezing again.

”You’re something else, Jeagerjaquez. I give you that.” Ichigo chuckles, and pets the blue hair with a soft smile dancing on his lips.

He was feeling completely relaxed again, which likely had been Grimmjow’s intention. The man just leans closer again to kiss him, touch that lingered far longer than was strictly necessary.

”Seriously though; don’t ever say that to Nel.”

”Yeah, I ain’t got a death wish, don’t worry.”

Ichigo snickers a bit, and then is silenced quickly by another kiss, this one much more heated than the previous ones. The younger male brings both of his hands up now to grasp the blue strands firmly, tilting his head to give the kiss a better angle. It doesn’t take long for things to escalate from there, but Ichigo could sense Grimmjow was being gentler and more cautious again.

He wanted to tell the man he was not made of glass, but understood the wariness, so Ichigo just enjoyed it.

 

 

Shinji had dropped the two off to a hotel, and was currently driving to his home. Well, his current place he was staying at for his job, not his actual home. It was raining, so he could barely see where he was going, nearly driving through the red lights. As the man waits for it to change into green, his eyes glance around the city streets. Most of the few people who bothered to go outside in this weather wore raincoats or had umbrellas.

Shinji was really glad to be in a car. It was raining cats and dogs outside.

As he glazes over the small crowd, he spots something that looked awfully familiar. A man with a silvery hair was standing at one corner, nearby the crossroad. He was covered by a black umbrella, shielding him from the rain. Shinji frowns and leans closer, trying to get a better look; the man looked familiar. Suddenly, there’s a loud sound ringing in the air, and Shinji almost jumps through the roof, glancing back irritated; the lights had switched and the driver behind him had honked his horn impatiently.

As Shinji turns his attention back at the man, he was gone. The man chews on his lip as he continues driving; his sixth sense was tingling, indicating something was going to happen soon.

Something not necessarily good.

 

 

The silver haired man takes out his phone once he reaches the motel he’d been staying, slipping into his assigned room and calling for his superior.

“My my, it seems they’re planning on something; I saw Kisuke with that woman, visiting our boys.” As expected, his boss is not fazed.

He just tells the man to keep an eye on them.

“Given he shows up, I’d say the boys’ condition has gotten worse, don’t ya think?”

_“We’ll wait and see, Gin.”_

That was the only response he got.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im seriously struggling with this story if I'm honest; each chapter takes a while to come up with, longer than normally.   
> Also, I wanna say I should be sorry for that crude joke Grimmjow makes near the end, but that would be lying.  
> Don't worry peeps, he'd in all likeness never say that to Nel's face.   
> Maybe.   
> ..............  
> I need to not try to make jokes for a fic when I'm tired.


	16. Roadtrip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuuhei drives Ichigo and Grimmjow to their new destination. On the way, the blue haired man notes they are being followed and decides to investigate while his younger unofficial BF is on a bathroom break.

Shuuhei did come and pick them up the next day.

Quite frankly, it was awkward to Ichigo how he seemed surprised that Grimmjow hadn’t killed him yet or something.

”You’re quite something kid, if you were able to tame that thing.” The man comments with a slightly impressed tone, nodding at Grimmjow who was currently focused on stuffing the last bits of his things into his bag for the upcoming trip. If he heard the comment, the blunette ignored it.

”I would not say ’tamed,’ he just....I suppose getting on his good side has its benefits.” Ichigo comments with an awkward shrug, not too keen on explaining to the black haired man that he and the older male were kind of an item, unofficially.

Unofficially, because neither of them had actually said it yet.

”I suppose you’re right.” Shuuhei hums, watching as the blunette straightens himself, disregarding the last cigarette to the floor carelessly, stomping on it to turn it off. This gains a disapproving look from Shuuhei, to which Grimmjow responds with a dull look, clearly not caring what the officer thought.

Like last time, Ichigo sat at the front, glancing at Grimmjow from the rear-view mirror at times.

While the last evening was undeniably pleasant, it was clear the man was tense again, and Ichigo was not surprised. They were going to see his sister again for one, and while things seemed to be going better this time, Grimmjow likely reflexively expected to find his sister in a broken, crying heap again like last time. Plus, there was the whole blood transfusion thing.

Despite his dismissal of the topic earlier, the younger male had a feeling Grimmjow actually did not like the idea one bit. Ichigo could not stop but wonder if there was more to the whole deal than just the risk of it ending up in the wrong hands. Why did Urahara need it so much anyway? That had never been explained either. You’d think testing a blood-sample required less than what they’d talked about.

”We’ll figure this out, don’t worry.” The officer reassures Ichigo as he spots the slight frown on the teen’s face. The orange haired male just sighs and turns his head to gaze out of the window.

It was still rainy, making him uneasy, but at least it wasn’t thundering, so the likelihood of a freak out was small. Still, it would be better if it didn’t rain.

”Oi, how long’s this gonna take?” The gruff voice from the backseat surprised them both, and Shuuhei glances at the man from the rearview mirror as well with a frown.

”A few hours. If you need a bathroom break.....”

Grimmjow snorts, then leans forward to his seat, resting his arm against Ichigo’s.

”Did they not fuckin’ brief you on anything? There’s a fuckin’ storm chasing us right now. A thunderstorm in all likeness.” Ichigo felt his blood turn cold, and looking up, there were indeed dark clouds there. Darker than what you would get just for rain.

”I am aware. I would use another route if I could, but this is the fastest; we can hopefully avoid the worst bits of the rain.” The officer states simply, frowning as he did not quite understand Grimmjow’s point.

The blunette huffs, rolling his eyes.

”Yeah, cause a car can outrun a lightning.” His voice was laced with sarcasm to the point it was dripping.

Then, he gestures towards Ichigo with his thumb.

”This fucker will go bonkers the second a lightning hits too near. You DON’T want that happening in the middle of the road while you’re driving.”

Shuuhei frowns, glancing at Ichigo who was glaring at the blue haired man, although he did seem kind of tense...

”So what you want me to do? Changing the route at this point requires permission from the HQ, and the reception is bad in this area. Plus, that change might get us caught in the middle of the worst part of it.”

”Pull over.”

Shuuhei glances at the man on the backseat again; the road was currently empty, but a passerby could pop up at any time, so he couldn’t afford looking away from the road that much, especially not in such a rainfall. ”Why should I do that? We cannot just wait for the storm to pass; it looks to be a big one, and I’d like to get to the destination before this gets unbearable.”

”Either you fuckin’ do it, or I’ll just yank Kurosaki back here right now, and that’s gonna mess with your focus.” Grimmjow near growls at the man, and Ichigo could tell even the normally kind of stone-faced Shuuhei seemed slightly unnerved by the vicious glare.

He was also confused.

”Please. Do as he says.” Ichigo states quietly, feeling his body go tenser by the minute as the sky got darker.

Shuuhei blinks, but does as requested, and Ichigo slips to the backseat, settling against Grimmjow as close as he could, completely ignoring his embarrassment he felt about it. They could not afford him freaking out during a car-trip like this, so Ichigo had to swallow his pride and do this in a way his mind seemed to find comfortable enough. The officer lifts eyebrow at this, but then turns his head away and starts driving again.

It was clear those two knew what they were doing, although Shuuhei wasn’t sure just how exactly Ichigo sitting beside the overly aggressive man helped.

He soon learned how, as indeed a lightning struck somewhere behind them, followed by a loud rumble a few moments later.

Ichigo’s eyes went wide and he lets out a scared whimper, near hiding against Grimmjow as his breathing became erratic. Shuuhei glances at them concerned, but the blue haired male just told him to drive, before turning his attention back to the freaked out teen, rubbing his scalp gently and breathing evenly, until Ichigo’s gasps of air started to match his slow rhythm.

So.

Jeagerjaquez could deal with panic attacks?

Who would’ve thought?

It was not something mentioned in any of the files Shuuhei had seen. He surely would not have believed the man was capable of this kind of gentleness from their interactions. Then again...he’d spoken with the man’s sister once, and Nelliel-san seemed to hold him in high regard somehow. He could not really buy it just being some sort of siblings’ loyalty, not from her.

After a while, the rain got heavier, so he was forced to slow down.

Shuuhei had hoped to keep ahead of the storm, but now it did not seem likely. He might have to pull over and wait for the worst to pass after all. Ichigo was still tense all over, his eyes sort of fixating on to a point in thin air, letting Grimmjow rub his hair, clearly trying to focus on that feeling alone. Shuuhei was a little unsure on how to precede this right now; he’d heard of the potential that the kid could turn violent; nobody had mentioned panic- or anxiety-attacks like this.

It was a clear sign however that something was off; he’d known Ichigo ever since he was a kid. They barely interacted, true, but he’d heard stories about the boy each time he saw Isshin and chatted with him. Ichigo was a fiery youth in nature, a bit reckless too, and definitely headstrong. None of that was shown right now.

Ichigo was clearly not himself right now.

”How the hell do your genes make somebody into a scared mess? That sounds counterproductive given your purpose.”

Grimmjow snorts, but for Shuuhei’s surprise answers the question.

”Imperfect formula. Some got shitty side-effects. His is even more unpredictable ’cause it’s inherited and got activated in a near instant after being asleep, so to say, for years, instead of being cultivated over the years after artificial insertion.”

Shuuhei did not understand much about that, so he remained quiet.

Grimmjow’s gaze drifts away to the scenery outside the window, once the orange head slumps against him, the owner having fallen asleep somehow despite his anxiousness. They’d crossed an intersection, and were currently driving through a populated area, smaller village or so. Something catches the corner of his eye, and Grimmjow notes that there was a biker following them further away, just at the corner of the nearest building. It was...strange to say the least, for somebody to go out with a fuckin’ bike in this weather. It felt like the driver wanted to be quick, but also less noticeable.

If that was the case, they were obviously a bloody beginner in this shit as they looked too damn out of place to not be noticed.

 

Grimmjow’s sixth sense was tingling, indicating something was off about that driver.

Seeing a gas-station ahead, the man tells the officer to stop. Shuuhei protests at first, but Grimmjow just nods at Ichigo, who did look like he needed to pee as if by lucky coincidence. With a sigh, the man pulls over and watches after Ichigo on the bathroom, while Grimmjow paces around, taking in the surroundings and the people in the station. Soon enough, he spots the driver who’d seemingly been following them lingering around; looking at them up close, Grimmjow could now tell it was a woman. The man paces slowly to the nearby magazine rack, glancing at the driver from the corner of his eye.

She’d pulled a hat and a hood over her head and seemed to be pretending on checking trough the snack isle, like Grimmjow was.

It did not matter that the chick tried to hide his face, Grimmjow recognized him soon enough.

She was one of Aizen’s younger lackeys; he’d seen her around once or twice before ditching the maniac’s lunatic ass with Nel and Harribel. The pigtail girl had a crush on their boss or some shit like that as far as Grimmjow could remember, so he was not surprised to see her still around. There was also another detail Grimmjow could recall, and an involuntary predator grin creeps up his face.

The little bitch was _deadly afraid_ of him, let alone all of his rank.

Why the hell had she taken on such a job?

Then again, she was one of those who did anything for the one they quote-on-quote loved. Grimmjow got the feeling, but not when it was one sided as fuck. He’d never go that far to a bastard who never gave a rat’s ass about you. The girl’s one-sided love had always been a source of ridicule and pity from others. Grimmjow turns his gaze back at the magazines as he senses the girl come closer.

There is a brief halt in her steps as she realizes who was standing on her path, but she manages to walk past him regardless. Grimmjow waits until she’s out from the backside doors, and glances towards the bathrooms; Shuuhei was still waiting for Ichigo to come out, so the man decides to head out as well. He needed a smoke anyway and you weren’t allowed to smoke on here, let alone near the gas pumps - for obvious reasons - so he’d have to go further away into the parking lot at the back that she’s headed into.

The rain had paused for a brief moment, but the skies were still cloudy.

It was currently mostly void of cars compared to the front their vehicle was parked, but there was a small bike on one of the corners, probably the woman’s. She was nowhere to be seen right now though. Grimmjow digs out his cigarettes, lighting one while he scans the surroundings. There was a patch of forest beside the station, and Grimmjow had a feeling the girl had gone there, perhaps to report to her boss in peace or something. He also notes there was another vehicle at the other side of the parking area, but it did not raise his suspicion given the shit-ton of typical family stuff piled inside and on top of it.

Probably some parents with their brats on a holiday trip or so. His hunch about their pursuer proves to be correct, as after a while, the girl does appear back with a disgruntled frown on her face, and she stomps to her bike, digging through her bag for the keys or so. Grimmjow’s face twists into a smirk, and he slowly walks towards her, the girl too focused on her task to notice the approaching danger.

”Nice bike.”

She freezes instantly as she hears the familiar, casual tone. Grimmjow walks beside her and smokes, pretending not to know who she was.

”Looks a lil’ fancy for a girl like you.”

”....My boyfriend got it for me.” The girl mutters out, trying to sound casual while clearly terrified out of her mind.

Grimmjow had never really dealt with her directly, which was probably why she dared to speak; in her mind, the likeness of him recognizing her voice was likely small.

”He’s got an over-the-top taste I gotta say; this thing will break if you just nudge it the wrong way.” Grimmjow chuckles, poking the vehicle with his foot, enjoying the way the girl stiffened for a second from a mixture of anger and fear; anger because he was mocking a gift Aizen gave her, and fear because he could probably break her only mode of transportation with just a kick, even accidentally, let alone break _her_ if he wanted to.

”It gets the job done.”

The girl mumbles out again, focusing on seemingly looking for something from her bag, clearly hoping that Grimmjow would go away.

The blunette hums, and then paces around the bike, so they were facing each other now. The girl kept her gaze low at her bag, trying to hide her face more with the scarf she also had.

”And what might yer job be... _Loly_?”

The girl freezes instantly as he says her name, and cautiously turns to look up at him.

”I don’t know that name.” Grimmjow snorts, blowing smoke at her face and making her cough.

”Yeah? ’Cause I could’ve sworn you were that pigtailed bitch who had a huge crush on our lunatic of a boss. Some sad shit lemme tell ya.”

She stiffens again as predicted, and tries badly to not glare at him.

Some things never changed, huh?

Grimmjow takes another drag from his cigarette, measuring the girl with his gaze. She was clearly uncertain if he truly knew her identity or not, given he hadn’t done anything yet. After a moment of tense silence, the man finally drops his cigarette, stomping on it to turn it off.

”Seriously. Why the fuck did Aizen make YOU try n’ tail us. You stick out like a sore thumb.”

The girl finally seemed to realize she was busted, as she glances around and backs away slightly. There was a family on the parking lot further away, probably keeping a break from a long drive. As long as there were witnesses, she was fairly certain the former Espada would not do anything. However, as soon as they’d be left alone...

Suddenly, a strong grip grasps her scarf and tugs her closer, nearly making her choke.

”So tell me; what the fuck is the lunatic planning ta do with Kurosaki? He’s the one yer following, ain’t he?”

Loly remains quiet, just staring up at the sharp blue eyes with a defiant look. She was supposed to be more professional and not let this traitor intimidate her. Unfortunately, Grimmjow was real good at it. He brings her face even closer, to the point she had to stand on her toes to reach him. Loly felt her heartbeat race ridiculously fast in her chest. It was frustrating how easily this man could intimidate her with just a look.

”You don’t wanna talk huh? Maybe I should break yer leg like last time.”

Loly falters a bit at that devilish smile and idle threat; Grimmjow had indeed broken her limb once before in the past, and even when she was superhuman herself, her level required a longer healing period.

Plus, it had hurt like hell.

And that had been when he was a teen; Grimmjow had to be much stronger now.

Loly refuses to show any of her panicked thoughts however that this particular memory triggered, and just glares back at him with earlier defiance.

”I will not discuss with traitors.”

Grimmjow just grins at her, clearly not surprised by the answer. It did not matter if she hid her fear; the man could easily read through her pathetic attempt at masking it. He glances at the family who’d paid no mind to them, probably thinking from this angle that they were a kissing couple.

That thought was so disgusting Grimmjow had to shake his head to get that image off his head.

After a while, the group vanishes inside their car and drives off, leaving the parking lot empty. Loly’s eyes widen as she notices the predatory tint that appears in the already sharp blue eyes, so she is really surprised when the man just drops her with a disinterested huff.

”You oughta get better at this job.” He snorts, then glances aside as if to check the area was still empty.

The girl had chosen wisely - or unwisely - the spot she’d parked, as it was on a blind spot when it came to the security cameras. Without a further ado, he grabs the bits of the bike’s engine and literally rips part of it off, making Loly yelp and back away in shock. Grimmjow drops the black soot covered piece to the ground and kicks the hole he’d made next, shattering the thing further and making the bike fall to the ground with a loud sound. Loly just stares at the carnage in front of her in shock, then glares up at him viciously, opening her mouth to likely yell or something.

She never got a chance, as Grimmjow grasps her throat making her choke again, holding a finger on his lips with a calm look.

”Be glad. It could’ve been you.”

He says simply and drops her to the ground, spitting beside her before pacing back towards the entrance, stuffing his soot covered hand into his pocket to hide it.

Yeah.

It could’ve been blood.

Normally it would’ve been, but he was given a ride by a fucking cop, so he could not just go and kill her. Plus...he had a feeling Kurosaki would not have approved of it either once he'd found out, and he would've found out for sure, noisy little shit.

He seemed to have a fucking type when it came to people he let past his defenses; Nel could be as annoying.

So instead of finishing her off, he’d made sure it would be a lot harder for the bitch to follow them.

Lucky thing they stopped at this small station with barely any people around, nobody had seen his interaction with the woman. She could go and raise a halo with the staff, but Grimmjow knew already Loly wouldn’t; Aizen would not exactly take kindly on her making herself so noticeable during a stealth mission. Plus, her kicking a fuzz would be pretty much admitting her failure, and Grimmjow knew how prideful the pigtail chick was.

As he steps back in, the man notes that Shuuhei was no longer waiting by the bathroom, indicating that they’d already gone outside.

The man drops by the bathroom to wash his soot covered hand, gaining a curious look from a young boy who was in there.

”Don’t go and punch a bike kid, the mess will be horrible.” The man remarks with a smirk, gaining a confused look from the child as he walks out.

Heading to the car, Grimmjow notes that Ichigo was a little tense, hood over his head and hands in his pockets as he looked around nervously. Once the copper notices him, he frowns. ”Where were you?”

”Takin’ a smoke. Ya can’t do that inside.”

Shuuhei lifts eyebrow at that.

”Why did you go to the back to do it? You could’ve just remained by the car.”

Grimmjow just gives him a bored look, than snaps his fingers in front of Ichigo’s eyes, startling him off his thoughts. The brown eyes look up at him, and the youth seems relieved to see him as he relaxes visibly.

”What? Thought I’d skipped out on you or something?” Grimmjow chuckles and the fiery haired male gives him an annoyed stare, but averts his gaze with slight color on his face.

It was an irrational thought, but when Shuuhei had told him Grimmjow had gone out in the back for some reason, he’d panicked a little. It was not like him to worry over something insignificant, but then again....nothing felt normal right now.

His entire body was on high alert for reasons partially unknown - partially, because it was likely his genetics causing a mess in his brain - and Ichigo felt jumpy about everything and anything, a clear sign his condition was getting worse.

Sure, physically he felt fine, but his mind was going haywire, and the young man sincerely hoped that Urahara’s cure would work, because if this kept up --

His thoughts are cut short as Grimmjow grabs his chin and leans down to kiss him, distracting the youth from his uneasy thoughts that were plainly visible on his face.

”Chill. Yer pushing yourself too far right now.” Grimmjow tells him quietly, keeping eye contact with the smaller male.

He could tell Kurosaki was swimming in dangerous waters in his head right now, and the fact his body was still so tense was a further indication of that.

”We better head out.” Shuuhei comments after a while, watching the two share the unusually tender moment between one another.

Unusual from Grimmjow to be exact, although Shuuhei had to admit; perhaps his initial impression based on the files was lightly off.

”The weather is getting worse again.” Indeed, as the two look up, there were heavy rainclouds heading their way. Without further ado, they enter the vehicle and Shuuhei starts the engine, not even questioning why Ichigo chose to sit beside Grimmjow again. It was clear the blue haired man was able to keep him relatively at ease.

As they drive out of the station, Grimmjow spots a familiar figure watching them leave, phone on her hand.

She was clearly still pissed about him breaking her bike, but had swallowed her pride and informed her shitty boss about the fact she couldn’t continue her pursuit. The man snorts, gaining a confused glance from his companion, but Grimmjow just smirks at Ichigo, tugging him closer.

”Nothing. Worry about yerself Kurosaki.”

Ichigo had a feeling the man left something untold, but chose not to question it, just resting his head on the strong shoulder.

 

 

In the end, they managed to reach their destination without any trouble from Ichigo, as he’d just napped the rest of the way, clinging to Grimmjow to the point he’d probably be embarrassed about it if awake.

Shuuhei had mostly been quiet, focusing on driving, although he had asked Grimmjow a bit about Ichigo on the way. Namely, his motivation on why he was helping.

”He really acts differently from what I’ve seen and heard from Isshin before. It’s like he’s that little kid again he was that day his mum died.”

Grimmjow glances down at Ichigo, vaguely recalling the fiery haired kid he’d seen weeping that day. The cop had a point, he had to admit.

”It feels wrong. Seeing him like that again I mean. Ichigo’s a good kid and usually not scared like this...” Shuuhei glances at sleeping Ichigo from the rear-view mirror, cursing Aizen in his head for this; the fact his shenanigans could even effect somebody that had nothing to do with it really...it was wrong in so many levels.

”He’s a brave fucker alright. Got first-hand experience.” Grimmjow chuckles out quietly, glancing down at the youth tightly attached to his side.

Again, he wondered just why did people find safety in somebody like him?

Let alone, why did these people want to use him like some sort of fucking human body pillow all the time?

......Not that he complained, honestly.

”Honestly, why do you care? Why did you even bother coming with us? It’s not like this has anything to do with you that much. Getting the blood Urahara-san needs doesn’t mean you’d have to stick by personally afterwards.” Shuuhei asks after a moment of silence. Grimmjow looks up at the officer with a stoic look, though there was a hint of annoyance in those piercing blue eyes.

”It’s just....it feels strange, when I think back of what I know about you.”

Grimmjow snorts at that predictable addition.

”Yeah, how can a violent maniac like me give a shit about anyone. T’s not like I was doing that shit to look after my fucking family.”

He pauses, and his glare and voice turns slightly venomous.

”A family YOU guys fucked up with your incompetence.”

Shuuhei frowns at that comment.

”For the record, I was not a part of the team back then.”

”Doesn’t fucking matter, all of ya are the same to me.” The blue haired male pauses and glances down as Ichigo shifts a little, face in a frown almost if he sensed Grimmjow was being hostile to somebody he liked again. The man watches him quietly for a while, and then turns his gaze out from the window.

”Why did I bother coming with him, huh?”

His gaze drifts at the officer, looking at him through the reflection from the mirror.

”I tagged along, ’cause this little shit is _mine_ now if you catch my drift, and you fuckers already screwed up something that’s mine before, so I wanna personally make sure it won’t happen again.”

Shuuhei goes quiet at that.

 

 

 

When Ichigo woke up, he realized he was no longer in the cabin but a foreign room. Before he could panic however, he smelt a familiar smell of cigarette nearby, and turning his head, he finds Grimmjow sitting on the couch, talking quietly with Nelliel. The youth takes an inventory on the woman, noting she was in much better shape. Her skintone looked healthier, she no longer had bags under her eyes, and the normally messy green hair was tied back on a nice looking, wavy ponytail. Listening to her voice, she also sounded more stable, most of her childish lisp gone. Overall, she seemed happy, and even Grimmjow was a bit more relaxed than he usually was near Nelliel, a sign that the woman was indeed doing better.

They were currently talking about him, so Ichigo decides to pretend he was still asleep, listening in out of curiosity.

”That sounds bad Grimmy; that kind of constant anxiety is not a good sign.” ”Yeah. Even the copper that brought us said it’s not like Kurosaki to be this way.” The woman hums and holds her chin thoughtfully for a moment. ”Well, hopefully Urahara-san’s cure will help. It would be awful to see Ichigo die because of something he shouldn’t have been involved with from the start.”

Grimmjow lets out an agreeing grunt, blowing some smoke out of his lungs. For a moment the two siblings fall silent, probably each pondering the situation in their heads. Then, a slight mischievous smile appears on Nelliel’s face, and the man looks at her with lift eyebrow.

”What?”

”It’s wonderful to see you care for somebody else as well for a change.”

Grimmjow snorts and brushes trough his hair, glancing at Ichigo who was still pretending to be asleep. ”Yeah yeah, it’s funny ta see yer sibling be getting soft n’ shit.”

”That’s not what I meant.” Nelliel sighs, but smiles regardless, knowing that when it came to things like this, Grimmjow hated admitting them out loud.

She knew either way, she’d learned to see through his cold crack a long time ago.

“I think we should let him sleep for a bit longer; that kind of mental gymnastics have to be exhausting.” Nelliel comments after a moment, glancing at Ichigo as well.

Grimmjow hums, blowing some smoke out.

“Yeah. Still, that hat-bastard better show up soon and get this thing moving, because based on my experience, Kurosaki’s in deep shit right now.” He pauses to take another drag from his cigarette, before his tone turns stealthy, and Ichigo could imagine the expression he had on his face as those words dropped out of his mouth like venom.

“If they screw this up again, m’gonna personally send all of ‘em to _hell_.”

Nel gives her brother a scolding look, but understood why Grimmjow sounded a little hostile and on the edge; last time he’d trusted these people, she’d gotten hurt, bad.

Now Grimmjow had two things on the line that he cared for, and he was forced to trust the very people that failed him last time. It was a tall order, but also a testament to how much Ichigo had affected him; there was no way Grimmjow would’ve agreed to it, had it not been for the fiery haired youth.

Nelliel’s gaze drifts at Ichigo again, and she couldn’t stop but smile. She hoped to whatever gods as well, that they could return the huge favor the young man had unknowingly done to their family, namely her brother.

 

Ichigo had managed to make him care again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew  
> Chapter sixteen.  
> I did it finally  
> yayyyy  
> Sorry if there are any typos or errors, it's kinda late here while I'm posting, and I tried to check it but may have missed some.  
> And Nel is back, hooray!


	17. Cat and Bunny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo spends his first morning in their new place dealing with a grumpy Grimmjow and arguing with him about cats and bunnies.

When Ichigo finally decided to get off the bed, it was early in the next morning, based on the dim sunlight outside his window that was slowly getting brighter.

The room was empty, indicating that the siblings had left the room a while back to not disturb him. For a moment Ichigo just sits there, rubbing his eyes with his palms and taking in a deep breath.

Right now he felt ... okay.

The drive had certainly been exhausting, and it frustrated Ichigo to no end; he was NOT supposed to be such a crybaby. Another thing he could not stop but ponder though; most of his symptoms had been mental so far, even though according to Grimmjow, there should be physical symptoms as well. Yet, he had not really had any. Ichigo could not stop but wonder, if perhaps…

perhaps he was immune to the physical effects like Grimmjow as well.

It was not an impossible thought, but he couldn’t be sure. It was something he’d likely have to discuss with Urahara later.

The youth lifts his gaze as a sudden noise caught his attention, and frustratingly his body tenses as the door opens. He relaxes instantly however, as he sees a familiar patch of blue hair. Grimmjow paces towards his bed, hands in his pockets, a cigarette on his lips as usual. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t slept at all for a night or so. It would not be too surprising, given how stressed out the man had been earlier.

”Sup?” He asks casually, and Ichigo looks at him with a frown.

”You okay?”

”Tired. The mad hatter took his first sample ’bout two hours ago.”

Oh, right: the whole reason they were there was for the blood thing that Urahara had to do.

”Should you be smoking right after it?”

”Fuck you.” Grimmjow grunts at him, blowing smoke at Ichigo’s face and making him cough.

Someone was clearly being a grumpy-cat today.

The orange haired male doesn’t stay mad long as his companion leans closer and plants a firm kiss on his lips, making Ichigo’s cheeks glow lightly; that would likely never go away, no matter how many times Grimmjow did this. He also noted that Grimmjow’s lips were slightly colder than usual, which was worrying, even if he knew the likely reason behind the change in temperature.

”Why exactly did Urahara even need so much of it?”

That was what Ichigo still didn’t understand. The fact they needed a transfusion so he would not have complications….

”My blood goes bad faster than normal blood once outside my body, at least in small amounts. He likely needed a lot ‘cause he needs more time testing.”

”That...it sounds like it’s hard for it to end up in the wrong hands then.”

Grimmjow gives him a dark grin, and Ichigo could guess what he was going to say before the man said it.

”There’s a reason Aizen didn’t actually care much if one of us died. We were almost more useful dead than alive.”

”Blood should go bad after death too.”

”Not if you harvest it soon enough.”

It was such a morbid conversation that Ichigo almost wanted to laugh hysterically.

”So...where are we exactly?”

”Some sorta private villa or so that the white haired old man owns. Hell if I know.” Grimmjow shrugs, blowing more smoke out of his lungs, before yawning. It was always kinda freaky, seeing how sharp his fangs were.

”You should be resting.” Ichigo scolds him, and the man grunts, rubbing his hair and telling him that he already had, which the youth naturally didn’t buy given the bags under the man’s eyes.

The orangette frowns annoyed, and then grabs Grimmjow’s shoulders, nearly forcing him to slump down to the bed. The man curses at him naturally in protest, but relaxes soon after, resting his head on Ichigo’s lap while the younger male caressed his hair.

”Let me return the favor for now.”

Ichigo comments with a smile as he plucks the cigarette away, turning it off on the ashtray at the nightstand that was likely there for Grimmjow; their host was clearly aware just how much he smoked. The blunet snorts at Ichigo, cracking an eyelid open and looking up at him.

”All ya been doing lately is laze around. You are just using me as an excuse ta not get off the bed.”

Ichigo rolls eyes, telling the man not everybody were as much of a lazy ass as he was. Grimmjow just snorts again, before yawning and settling down properly, clearly enjoying the attention he was getting right now despite his protests. It had to be nice, Ichigo thought suddenly, for him to be the one pampered for a change. It was usually him comforting Ichigo, or his sister.

Grimmjow deserved a break.

It did not take long for the man to fall asleep, and Ichigo could not stop himself from smiling, seeing his relaxed face for once. After a moment, Nelliel steps in cautiously, and upon noting her brother was asleep, she closes the door behind her silently, before walking there and sitting beside Ichigo.

”How are you, Ichigo?”

”Better than during the trip I suppose. How about you?”

The woman smiles a bit, shrugging.

”Better. Ukitake san has been a great host, and the psychiatrist, Ryuuken-san, he assigned for me has been decent too. I haven’t had fits since I came here.”

”That is great to hear.” Ichigo smiles back at her, hand still scratching the blue hair beneath his fingertips.

Her smile fades after a moment, as her grey eyes drift down to look at Grimmjow.

”I...still cannot remember what happened.”

”Maybe it is better that way.” Ichigo points out quietly, noting her displeased expression.

”No I...want to remember. It could be of help for them, in order to take down those responsible.”

She pauses, and then gently squeezes her brother’s shoulder.

”What happened back then...Grimmy needs closure for it. He needs to see those guilty brought to justice. I owe him that much.”

Ichigo could understand her sentiment, even if he did not exactly agree with it. Those memories had been locked away for a reason, plus if Grimmjow would find out who was behind what happened…he could do something stupid given his temper.

For a moment they both remain quiet, just examining the sleeping figure on Ichigo’s lap.

”How is Yoruichi-san? I assume you used her to replace the taken blood.”

”She is also recovering right now and should be fine eventually. I came to look for Grimmy as I noticed he was not where he was supposed to be.”

Nel looks down at Grimmjow with an exaggerated displeased-big-sister look, before giggling softly.

”I knew he’d be here.”

Ichigo felt his cheeks gain color, and he coughs, looking aside and rubbing his head.

”Tia would be happy to see this too; he was always so angry, all the time. The fact he is able to relax like this near you...it is a good sign.” Nel comments softly after a moment of silence, and Ichigo shrugs, muttering that getting on Grimmjow’s good side had its benefits.

”Have you talked to her by the way?Harribel I mean?”

Nelliel brushes her hair, gazing aside for a moment.

”Yes. She is still worried for us both. She is also lonely, even if Pantera is still there. The cat has apparently gotten a bit grouchy now that her favorite owner isn’t there.” Ichigo could only imagine what that meant.

If the cat found Grimmjow her favorite owner...she _had_ to be about as bad when grumpy.

”Can’t they bring her for a visit or so?” Nelliel shakes her head; she was clearly not happy about this, but at the same time accepted the situation.

”Safety reasons. Bringing you and Grimmy here was already risky.”

Yeah, it made sense.

 

After another moment of silence, Grimmjow shifts in his sleep, turning his back towards Nel, which gained a pouty look from the aforementioned woman.

”You can’t _possibly_ find me annoying even in your sleep.”

Ichigo chuckles softly at that, looking down at the sleeping man with a fond look, not unlike what Nelliel was doing right now as well.

”....I kinda need to pee.” Ichigo admits after a moment, and Nel helps him to shift Grimmjow to the bed properly so he could sprint to the bathroom door at the left side of the room.

After relieving himself, he tugs on the clothes provided for him, and after a moment of hesitation, grabs Grimmjow’s hoodie the man had worn earlier and left to the couch when he'd gone for the blood transfusion thing, tugging it on as well. Nelliel smiles a bit mischievously at that, but said nothing. She knew why Ichigo did that, for she had the habit of wearing Grimmjow’s hoodies and jackets as well for comfort.

The man himself never really understood why she kept hogging his stuff, but he didn’t really care about knowing the reason behind it either, if it made her comfortable.

It was a subconscious thing, something to do with the familiar smell the garment was carrying, if Nelliel recalled right from what she’d read into the subject out of curiosity a while back.

 

The woman then leads him to the dining hall, which had the table full of breakfast food already. Urahara was sitting there with Ukitake san, discussing with the man about something. They both greet Ichigo as the two join them, and the hatted man gestures Ichigo to eat.

The youth had not noticed how hungry he was, not until now that he saw all that food in front of him. With a growling stomach, Ichigo sits down and begins munching trough the offered meal, going through it with almost embarrassing pace. The two men just watched him eat amused, while Nelliel ate her food, a bit slower but kind of messy as well.

Eventually Yoruichi steps in the room, looking a bit pale but firm with her steps as she slumps beside Urahara.

”Good to see some of us have an appetite. Jeaqerjaquez refused to eat a bite.” She comments, looking at the two devouring their share rather quickly.

Her comment makes Ichigo pause and look up at them with a concerned frown.

”Grimmy refused to eat until you woke up.” Nelliel explains him softly, and Ichigo looks at her disapprovingly.

He SHOULD get nutrients after a blood transfusion like that. No wonder the man had been so tired and grumpy at first.

”You can bitch at him once he bothers showing his pretty face again.” Yoruichi tells the young man amused, having expected the reaction.

”It might take a while; he is asleep on Ichigo’s bed right now.” That casual comment from the green haired lady made Yoruichi’s grin grow, and Ichigo kind of wanted to sink underground as he blushed madly, guessing what the woman was thinking.

”He just came in to check on me and ended up falling asleep.”

”Suuure. Is that why your hair is all messed up? And why you're wearing his hoodie?”

”I just woke up myself! Didn’t have time to fix it! And it's cold in here!” Ichigo protests and brushes through his hair with an irritated scowl and a blush on his face.

Yoruichi just smirks at him, clearly having fun teasing the youth. Even Urahara looked amused behind his fan, but he said nothing thankfully. Having Urahara join in would make this twice as unbearable.

After Ichigo was done eating and avoiding the amused, mischievous looks from the tanned woman, he grabs some food with him, and heads back to the room he’d been in.

He’d force the food down the stubborn man’s throat if he had to.

Ichigo finds the man from right where they had left him, asleep on Ichigo’s bed, hand resting on top of his stomach. Ichigo puts the food to the nightstand and sits beside him, just watching Grimmjow sleep for a moment again. It was rare to see him this calm looking; he was genuinely serene, completely without his usual scowl, a smirk, or annoyed stare. Sure, he had seemed happier for the past weeks before Ichigo began to have his problems, but he had never truly been relaxed. Not like this. Ichigo felt almost bad for trying to wake him up.

Almost.

He grasps Grimmjow’s shoulder and shakes him, until the man grumbles out at him and turns his back to Ichigo, clearly not eager in getting up.

”Stop being a grumpy baby; I brought you food.” Ichigo huffs and rolls his eyes, only gaining a snort from the man, who finally pushes himself up, rubbing his temple.

He says nothing, just grabs the offered meal and eats it, unusually quiet.

Ichigo’s earlier, fairly upbeat mood began to go down as he could tell something was bothering Grimmjow. Not just his dizzy state and the general situation, but something else.

”Hey.” Ichigo squeezes his shoulder again, and the blue eyes glance at him, still tired and slightly dull. It was eerie how much his gaze reminded Ichigo of the first few weeks of knowing each other again.

He reassured himself, that it was just because of the transfusion thing, not because Grimmjow’s mental state was taking a nose dive again because of him...

”I swear. If you pull that martyr bullshit on me, I WILL throw you out of the nearest fuckin' window.”

Ichigo blinks, looking at the blue eyes startled.

”You got that same ’everything’s my fault’ look on yer face Nel often has. Just fuckin’ don’t.”

The youth turns his gaze down, examining the bedsheets like they were suddenly the most interesting thing he’d ever seen.

”You can’t blame us; you have sacrificed so much of your own energy and mentality to take care of both of us, and it feels like...like we keep making things worse. Like we are letting you down.” Ichigo swallows down hardly, not wanting to get all weepy right now.

One, it was pathetic, two; it would just make Grimmjow more annoyed with him.

”Kurosaki, I would not waste my time with ya two if I did not think it was worth it.” The man sighs irritated, tired of having to tell this to both Nel and this idiot, over and over.

”I know, you have told me that before.” Ichigo manages to chuckle a bit.

”Fuckin’ _listen ta me_ for once, numbnuts.”

For a moment neither of them spoke.

Ichigo honestly hated dealing with an easily irritable Grimmjow, even more so now, when he gave more than a basic damn about him. it was…harder to be as stern with him as he used to be in the beginning, because he knew so much more about the man now, so finding the right words was not as easy.

”.....So now yer stealing my clothes too?”

The playful tone in Grimmjow’s tone catches Ichigo by surprise, and he glances down at himself, realizing that yeah, he was still wearing the man’s hoodie which was too big for him.

The young man gazes aside rubbing his neck with a slight flush.

”It was cold. It was the nearest thing I could find...”

Gods, why was he so embarrassed about this? It was not that unusual for a person to use the clothes of their....partner or so.

Perhaps it was the way Grimmjow’s grin made a big deal out of it, although Ichigo could tell there was a high level of fondness included in that teasing smirk.

”It won’t make you look any hotter, it’s a natural skill of mine and not achievable with my clothing.”

Ichigo’s gaze snaps at him annoyed, predictably, and Grimmjow snickers at his face, thoroughly enjoying Ichigo’s embarrassment. After a moment however, the more lighthearted mood in the room dissipates, as Ichigo looks at him with that same concerned frown from before. Grimmjow sighs and rubs his eyes again; figuring Kurosaki was not going to leave him alone about this until he gave an answer.

”I don’t exactly like they are trying ta coax memories outta Nel. She blocked ’em for a reason.”

”Nelliel said she is doing it willingly for you.”

”Why do ya guys always assume you need to do this stupid shit for me?!” Grimmjow snaps at Ichigo, making the latter back away a little surprised. His frown then intensifies, and he replies back with an equally frustrated tone.

”Because we care about you! That is how these things work; you don’t have to do the hard part all by yourself!”

”Yet I’m seemingly the _only_ one who  actually seems to be able to fuckin’ DO it in practice.” Grimmjow snarls at him, his mood gone sour incredibly fast, just like during their first weeks.

Ichigo suspected it was his weakened state that was making him more trigger happy than usual. It was not fun either way.

”Grimmjow, really.” Ichigo comments softer now, lifting his hand to place it on the man’s shoulder again, just holding it there.

”If you want us to not feel guilty about making you stress out, you gotta let us help you.”

Grimmjow just stares at him for a moment, clearly wanting to say something more, but eventually he just sighs and shakes his head, muttering something ugly under his breath. ”Do what ya want.”

He clearly wasn’t really in the mood for an argument, just too exhausted to really consider his words better.

Not that he did it much anyway, but he DID actually have a filter.

Grimmjow feels his companion shift closer, and doesn’t resist when Ichigo pulls him closer to kiss his temple. It was a silly gesture, aimed to comfort him while obviously not really working - he wasn’t a bloody toddler - but Grimmjow did not care right now.

Then, the door opens and Nel steps in, making Ichigo back away rubbing his head with a sheepish smile. She just flashes a smile at the young man, and then precedes to bear-hug her brother firmly. Grimmjow doesn’t react much like he usually would, for he was too tired to care.

”Glad to see you awake! Urahara-san wished to speak to you about few things once you’ve rested enough.”

Grimmjow just snorts, mumbling something under his breath. He did not exactly like talking to the mad hatter, especially given how his questions could get awfully personal, and how he seemed to be able to know the answers to them without you saying anything. It was freaky uncomfortable as all hell.

”He also wanted to talk to you privately, Ichigo. Preferrably right now.” Nelliel adds, suddenly looking at Ichigo who blinks confused, but then nods slightly.

”He’s at the room at the end of the corridor.” Nel informs him and Ichigo heads out to find Urahara.

He glances back towards the siblings, unable to hide his amused smile as Grimmjow was trying to pry his sister off him, who was having none of it right now, declaring that she had not had a chance to hug him for weeks now, so she was making up the time. While the blunet was seemingly annoyed, Ichigo was fairly sure he did not actually mind it.

Upon reaching the room, Ichigo finds Urahara sitting behind a desk, looking through some scientific paperwork in deep thought. Once he spots the youth step in the room, he gestures Ichigo to take a seat on the free chair. Ichigo closes the door behind him and sits down as instructed, noting that Urahara looked tired too.

”Good to see you up and about Kurosaki-san; I believe I forgot to state this back in the breakfast table.”

”Urahara, you look tired.”

”Why yes, I did not actually sleep much last night, for I was analyzing data from my previous experiments, and later from the blood-samples Mr. Jeagerjaquez contributed to us.”

”Did it go well?” Ichigo asks, still kind of concerned about how tired Grimmjow was.

”His exhaustion is likely because he refused to eat afterwards, like Nelliel-san likely told you.”

Ichigo just nods still annoyed about this. Grimmjow could be such a stubborn mule at times.

”I assume you made him eat finally.” The hatted man chuckles, gaining a sigh and nod from Ichigo, who crosses his arms with a frown.

”So, what did you want to talk to me about?”

”Well...I’d honestly like to learn more of your fits, what happens during them. Jeagerjaquez-san gave his own side of the story already, but I wish to hear yours.”

Ichigo was unsure on why his hallucinations mattered, but he also knew to trust Urahara. Despite his seeming aloof personality, he seemed to know what he was doing majority of the time.

”I understand if it’s hard, given they are usually trauma-based, according to him.”

Ichigo takes in a deep breath, noting that the hoodie he wore smelt faintly of Grimmjow’s cigarettes. Usually he hated that smell, but when it came to Grimmjow, it was weirdly comforting of a scent.

”No. I...if it’ll be of any help, I can talk about it.”

Urahara nods and waits for Ichigo to begin. Eventually, the young man manages to find his voice again.

”They’re...kind of weird. The first one was not even really a hallucination, more like...there was this...voice.”

”Voice?”

”Yeah. It kinda sounds like me, but not really. It was coaxing me to...do stuff.” Ichigo shudders as he recalls that first proper fit he’d had, aside from...

”Had that voice appeared before that?”

”No....although....I may have had a fit before that I just cannot remember.”

Urahara just nods, aware of this; Grimmjow had mentioned him the first time he’d began to feel suspicious over Kurosaki, how he could not remember attacking Grimmjow in a more ferocious manner than he usually would, prompting the man to use more excessive force than usual to make him stop.

”How about the hallucinations? Do you hear the voice during those too?”

Ichigo nods reluctantly after a moment. God, he sounded crazier and crazier the more he spoke about this.

Could all of this really just be wonky genetics? Except, it had to have something to do with then for Ichigo had not had such trouble before.

”What does it usually say?”

”....It usually just sort of belittles me.” Ichigo admits, unable to look Urahara in the eye.

”Belittles you? About what exactly?”

”That I’m not strong enough, that I’m not worth it, that I should let it take control or whatever...”

Ichigo cuts himself off, staring at the floor intently now.

Voicing it all out loud made it sound even worse. 

Luckily Urahara remained stoic as ever, not showing any signs that he thought Ichigo was going crazy. Granted, he likely was, but Urahara had enough tact to not rub it in his face.

”Sometimes it’s about...mom. When it thunders, I get a flashback, sorta like those nightmares when I was a kid.”

Ichigo quickly changes the subject, not wanting to talk about the voice right now.

”I see...that makes perfect sense.” Urahara holds his chin for a moment, then looks at Ichigo again, who was shifting uneasily in his chair.

”What usually snaps you out of it?” He could see the way the young man was shifting even more uneasy now, the way his face was yet again gaining color. Urahara knew the answer long before Ichigo voiced it out loud.

”....Grimmjow usually snaps me out of it. It’s...weird though; when I hallucinate, he kinda looks like a huge white cat or so.”

Urahara could not stop his faint amused smile.

”Indeed...few of those we worked with that had such trauma-based reactions, they usually had some sort of specific thing that appeared in their minds to calm them down; a mental image that they associated with safety or so.”

Ichigo looks up at Urahara confused.

”It was their way of coping with the trauma-based fits. Unfortunately, it was not quite enough in their case, but it is a start.”

The man looks through his notes, then turns his attention back to Ichigo, a familiar glint in his eyes.

”Perhaps...you could use this particular mental image to help you gaining an upper hand with these fits.”

”I...don’t know. It only really appears when Grimmjow is there.”

”Then try to think of this feline apparition once you start feeling like you are going to have a fit. I can’t say it will definitely work, but it should at least buy us more time.”

Ichigo just nods, unsure on what he could say to that.

”Oh, also, I’d like to have a blood sample from you as well. Likely it can be just a normal one given your genetics is only half superhuman.”

Ichigo blinks, and then nods. It was only reasonable for Urahara to ask that.

As the man takes a blood sample from Ichigo, he could not stop but feel curious now.

 

 

 

”Do you have one?”

Grimmjow stares at him dully, clearly not quite understanding Ichigo’s question.

”Some sort of… mental image or a being or whatever that you use to control it. I mean...you never explained exactly _how_ you do it.”

Grimmjow gazes at him for a moment, then slowly turns his head away to blow smoke out of his lungs. They were currently sitting on the bed in the room Ichigo had been in, with Grimmjow’s back resting against the wall. Ichigo was sitting cross legged at the feet end, watching him expectantly.

”.....I don’t have one.”

”Grimm...”

”Lemme finish! I don’t have one, as in, it works the opposite direction.”

Kurosaki blinks at him confused, and for once Grimmjow did not blame him.

”I ain’t got a calming 'spirit animal' or whatever in my noggin. It’s the opposite; the lethal part is activated by one.”

Ichigo’s eyes widen, as he seemed to understand what he meant now.

”So....”

”Pretty much; I don’t need to imagine a cuddly kitten ta calm down. I need ta keep mine in chains to make my mind cooperate with me.”

There was a teasing tone in his voice, and Ichigo began to regret having mentioned the panther to Grimmjow.

”....Still though, what is it exactly?”

Grimmjow looks at him amused; Kurosaki was bad at hiding his obvious curiosity about this. Right now he did look like a kid he’d used to call him. Grimmjow takes a drag from his cigarette again, blowing a cloud of smoke out before responding.

”Ironically, it’s kinda the same what ya described. A white panther, though less cuddly.”

Ichigo groans; he was never going to live this down, was he?

”So, you just imagine this thing appearing and you go berserk?”

”Not exactly...it’s more complex than that. Like most brain-gymnastics tend to be.”

Ichigo goes quiet at that, holding his chin with a thoughtful frown.

“You know…there was actually this other thing I’ve been wondering, although I forgot to mention it to Urahara.” Grimmjow lifts eyebrow, and the brown eyes look up at him unsure. “I… I haven’t actually had any proper physical issues yet. Maybe… maybe I am actually immune to that aspect, like you.” Ichigo felt strangely nervous saying this; almost if he was preaching a territory he shouldn’t by claiming he was potentially similar to Grimmjow with that aspect.

The man just examines him with a frown, clearly thinking about it.

“It…is possible. It ain’t like you don’t got a point. All of yer side-effects have been your brain going haywire and imagining fluffy white cats.”

Ichigo gives him an annoyed look; the man clearly was not going to let this go anytime soon.

Grimmjow pauses, and then a dangerously playful smirk appear on his face. Ichigo nearly yelps as the man reaches for him suddenly, tugging Kurosaki forward until he was resting on his chest, looking up at Grimmjow with a furious and bright red face.

”Talkin’ about cuddly kittens...” The man near purrs at him, a hand slipping under the hoodie and Ichigo's thin shirt.

”Gods, you’re so horrible at times!”

Ichigo complains embarrassed, but there was a smile creeping up his face already.

Grimmjow just chuckles and kisses him, shifting so Ichigo could properly sit on his lap now.

”The panther thing suits you, honestly; sometimes you are just one huge cat.” Ichigo jests once Grimmjow lets him breathe, and the man rolls his eyes at Ichigo.

”Yeah? Then that makes you a fuckin’ bunny.”

Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that and looks at him miffed.

”Why? My ears aren’t that big.”

Grimmjow’s slight smirk turns slightly predatory, and he tugs Ichigo closer, teeth grazing the skin on his neck, making the younger male gasp lightly in surprise. He kept forgetting how….playful Grimmjow could be with his affection, given how he’d mainly been focusing on keeping Ichigo calm and not freak out trashing shit.

”Because yer obviously a _prey_.”

The man whispers against him, the low tone he was using making Ichigo’s insides heat up alongside the color of his skin.

His hand sneaks up on the blue locks, mingling into them while Grimmjow planted his lips against his neck. At times the sharp canines grazed the sensitive skin there, never quite piercing through the skin, but enough to be noticed. Ichigo swallowed down the slight whimper he wanted to let out, biting his lip to keep quiet. He really did not want others to hear what they were doing right now.

Eventually, he felt Grimmjow lift his head to nip his ear, before shifting so they were face to face again. His already annoying playful grin grew a notch as he saw how Ichigo was finding it hard to look at him with an annoyed stare, coming off more as a childish pout than genuine irritation. He was a tad too easy to seduce, and Grimmjow had not actually even shown all he was capable off just yet.

The poor little shit would likely have a fuckin' heart-attack if he did.

 

“Don’t be so smug about the fact I think you’re kinda handsome; you ain’t the best I’ve seen.” Grimmjow just lifts eyebrow at him, clearly not buying his bluff.

Ichigo shoves him lightly, gaining another snicker from the man, who allows him to scoot back. As much as Ichigo enjoyed doing that, he preferred not to as long as there was a risk somebody would walk in on them.

“….Do you think Urahara’s idea will work?”

“Beats me, but I suppose it’s worth a shot.” Grimmjow shrugs, a smirk still plastered on his face.

He clearly found the thought of Ichigo having to think of him even more than he already did pleasing. Ichigo huffs at him, throwing a pillow at the man, who just catches it and throws it right at Ichigo’s face, making him fall on his back to the soft bed. He throws the offending object aside, glaring at Grimmjow.

“Hey! What if I’d been sitting on the edge!?”

“Yer head is tougher than that.” Grimmjow shrugs still amused, blowing some smoke out of his lungs again.

It was not like he’d have done that if it could have actually hurt the little shit. Kurosaki should know that by now.

As Ichigo keeps giving him the pouty look, the man cannot stop but grin even wider, in a full on teasing mode, evident from his purring tone as he spoke.

Yup, Kurosaki was probably right that he was a giant fur ball on the inside.

Fuck if he cared.

“Keep pouting like that and you’ll grow the rabbit ears after all.”

“For the last time; I am not a bunny!”

“Do I need ta take a picture to show how bunny-like you look when pouting?”

That comment naturally made Ichigo pout even more, and he crosses his arms, pursing his lips like a fucking toddler.

“Yup. Gotta ask Nel to get you one of those hair bandanas with bunny ears stuck on ‘em.”

He snickered as Ichigo grabbed the pillow from the floor again, throwing it at his face. Grimmjow didn’t even bother dodging; he just casually dropped the pillow beside him after it hit his face with a meek force.

“You’re such a jerk sometimes.” Ichigo huffs, but he was having hard time on fighting a smile off his face.

“How is me thinking yer a cute bunny being a jerk?”

“I don’t like being called cute!”

“Then stop bein’ cute.”

For a moment, the fiery haired male just stares at him, then finally starts snickering himself, realizing how silly the conversation was.

He then shifts closer again, this time resting beside Grimmjow, head on his shoulder. Grimmjow looks at him suspiciously, especially now that the shithead was full on living up to the term of adorableness with the giant doe-eyes he was aiming up at him.

“If she’s gonna get me that bunny ear bandana, she needs to get you one with cat ears.”

He said that with a fucking poker-face, aside from the doe-eyes.

Grimmjow just stares at him for a moment, and then a low chuckle emanates from his chest, until he was full blown laughing now.

“Yer something else, I give you that.” Ichigo just smirks at him, glad to see the earlier weighed look leave Grimmjow’s eyes.

Yeah, it would be alright, eventually.

 

 

 

 

“They’ve bought ta kid to one of Ukitake’s secret places. Urahara apparently got an idea on how to neutralize the boys’ genetics.” Gin watched as his boss slowly got up from his desk and paced towards the window, gazing outside for a moment.

Eventually, he turns to face his subordinate with a perfectly stoic face as usual.

“I am afraid we cannot allow that; it is better for us to go and claim what is ours.”

“What about ta woman n’ six?”

A slight cold smile appears on Aizen’s face, making Gin back away a bit.

“They are expendable.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh lookie, an update!  
> finally  
> More of a fluff chapter for now, calm before the storm.  
> The idea for the conversation at the end of this chapter came from this cute fanart pic I saw about Grimmjow and ichigo, where Ichigo had the cutest bunny ears ever. 
> 
> I am starting to have an outline on how this is gonna end, although I don't know when I'll have time to write the story forward, as school keeps me busy.


	18. Here we go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit starts hitting the fan.  
> What began as a relatively nice evening turns into a nightmare.

Ichigo found himself watch Urahara work in the lab with curiosity.

For the seemingly messy person he was, the sand blond haired man was surprisingly tidy and precise when using his equipment, analyzing the blood-samples he had, as well as reading trough tons of data both on computer and on paper. Apparently, Urahara had in fact been staying in this large mansion this whole time, researching into the superhuman genes, as well as providing Nelliel-san company with Yoruichi when Ukitake san wasn’t there.

Looking at the man’s notes, majority of it was gibberish to Ichigo, but he recognized some terms thanks to his family clinic background.

”It seems that so far, my antidote is just causing non-favorable mutations on his dna.” Urahara mutters out as he looks into a microscope, talking more to himself than Ichigo who was watching him.

After the young man had told Urahara about his theory that perhaps he had a similar immunity to the side-effects like Grimmjow, the man had begun to re-check through his things as if wanting to look into something he hadn’t thought of before.

The fiery haired male glances at the room behind a glass wall, where the blood donor was currently resting.

Grimmjow had not been kidding when he’d said that his blood goes bad quickly: Urahara had had to take his next batch already the next day, and he was working twice as fast. While he understood why this was done, Ichigo hated seeing the normally strong man resting pale and exhausted on a bed, like he was sick. Yoruichi was not in the room this time; for she could not donate hers to replace the lost amount after only such a short time, so they’d now used the reserves from some hospital.

 

Really, despite being superhuman, the fact Grimmjow had been able to do it again after such a brief resting time, it was nothing sort of a miracle in Ichigo's eyes.

 

After a moment of watching Urahara work, Ichigo slides off his chair and walks to the next room, sitting beside Grimmjow on the bed.

Nel was in the room too, reading a magazine.

She flashes a smile at Ichigo as he enters, but says nothing.

The brown eyes turn back at the man on the bed, and Ichigo notes he was still out cold. Tentatively, he reaches out to gently brush few locks of hair off his pale face. Grimmjow doesn’t react to the touch, indicating he was in a deep sleep.

”Urahara san sure is working hard.” Nelliel comments glancing towards the man in his laboratory.

”Yes. I suppose it’s no surprise, as he’s a family friend.” Ichigo comments without looking up, still watching Grimmjow sleep.

He felt bad; the fact the man was in such a state, it was all because of him. Ichigo slaps himself mentally, recalling the conversation they’d had yesterday.

Grimmjow was right, it was pointless to dwell in self-pity, for it did not help anyone.

Besides....Grimmjow had made it very clear, he’d only do this if he felt somebody was worth it, which Ichigo apparently was.

Still though...

”Don’t. I can tell what you’re thinking, Ichigo.” Nelliel comments softly, making the youth look up at her. She smiles at him sadly, before getting up and walking to the bed, sitting on the other side of it.

”It might be...hard not to feel guilty, seeing him like this, but what is going on with you right now is not your fault.”

Ichigo sighs, brushing trough his hair.

”I know. It’s just...he’s already endured so much with what happened to you. It’s not fair that I add to it.”

The green haired woman hums with a sad smile, perfectly understanding where Ichigo was coming from. However, she also knew her brother better than anyone.

”Don’t think of it that way. He certainly doesn’t.”

Ichigo lifts eyebrow, looking at her skeptic. Nelliel giggles a bit and brushes her hair, looking down at Grimmjow with a fond smile.

”He would have quit long ago if he thought you are being a burden. I believe he has told you this several times, has he not?” She asks, looking at her companion pointedly. The youth rubs his head, giving her a sheepish smile.

Yeah, he had.

A lot.

Nelliel giggles again, and then looks down at Grimmjow who shifts in his sleep, head tilting slightly towards Nel. The way it brightened her expression was ridiculously adorable, Ichigo did not know how else to describe it.

”Aww, you love me after all, you big, grumpy cat.” She coos, poking his nose lightly.

Ichigo was fairly certain Grimmjow would have snorted and told her to knock it off if he was awake.

”Talking about love...” She suddenly looks up at Ichigo again with that soft smile she often had.

”I suppose Shuuhei-san never told you about this, but he actually asked Grimm why he bothers with you, during your car trip when you slept.”

”....What did he say?”

Nelliel gazes at Grimmjow for a moment, noting the frown on his face had smoothened out after hearing her laugh. She almost wanted to cry, seeing that, but refrained from it for now.

”To quote what Shuuhei told me; _”I tagged along, ’cause this little shit is mine now if you catch my drift, and you fuckers already screwed up something that’s mine before, so I wanna personally make sure it won’t happen again_.”

Ichigo almost laughed at first, for her imitation of Grimmjow’s grumpy face and tone was perfect, but then the actual words caught up with him, and the youth goes quiet, just staring at her.

”I believe that is Grimmjow-ish for ’I love you.”

Nelliel tells Ichigo with an amused smile, and his face grows red slowly, until the youth has to look away and cough a bit.

Sure, it was...kind of what was going on, but hearing someone say it outright, it felt a little weird. In fact, he could not imagine Grimmjow EVER saying that out loud. No way in hell, the thought was too weird. So, having Nel state it was a bit better.

”Do you?” She suddenly asks quietly, and Ichigo looks up at her confused, noting her slightly hopeful gaze.

”I...guess? I mean...”

”There has been a lot to process lately, I understand.” She sighs with a smile, though that hopeful glint did not leave her hazel eyes.

 

It took Grimmjow a few hours to wake up, but by the time he came to, Urahara had dashed out from his lab to head somewhere with Yoruichi, and Nelliel had gone out too for her psychiatric appointment. Ichigo was asleep, sitting beside Grimmjow’s bed with his arms used as a pillow. The blue eyes examine the orange haired male for a moment, then he pushes himself up and pokes Ichigo’s head until the youth wakes up with a grumble, swatting his hand away and looking around with blurred gaze.

Once he spotted the familiar smirk however, Ichigo’s mind cleared, and he smiles relieved.

”Finally. I thought Urahara had accidentally injected you with some sort of coma inducing sedative or something.”

”I am pretty sure ya’d be bitching much more if he was this unreliable.” Grimmjow snorts, cracking his neck.

He was still pale, but some color had returned on him, and his eyes were clearer now.

”Hey...can I ask you something? Or is your brain still asleep?”

Grimmjow rolls his eyes at the mischievous grin Ichigo had, but then nods, noting the uneasiness hidden behind the warm brown eyes.

”...Earlier, Nel told me about what you said to Shuuhei.”

Grimmjow remains quiet, not understanding why Kurosaki looked so bashful and uneasy all of a sudden. Slowly though, he gets what the youth was referring to.

An amused smirk crosses his face, lifting an eyebrow.

”Really? You are actually surprised by that? Still?”

The young man coughs and rubs his head, looking aside with his cheeks gloriously red. Grimmjow snickers at him, making Ichigo’s embarrassment worse. Once the brown eyes meet his again, the man gestures him to come closer. With an annoyed huff, Ichigo scoots closer, slumping beside him to the bed, arms crossed with a pouty expression.

Grimmjow just rolls eyes again, and wraps an arm around him, tugging him closer until Ichigo had to settle on top of him.

”Look, I’m kinda new to this stuff and all...”

”No shit, Kurosaki.”

Grimmjow snorts, and then flashes him a teasing grin.

”Ya could not be wetter behind the ears even if you tried.”

This gains him another pouty look, but it was clear Ichigo found it hard to stay mad at him, with the way Grimmjow’s fingers sneaked into his hair and began to rub his scalp.

”Lemme guess, Nel told ya about it.”

”Apparently Shuuhei had told her first.”

The man huffs, shaking his head with a slight irritated frown. The hell that woman thought she was, going around babbling about him behind his back? Not that he was actually mad, it was just annoying.

”Did you mean it?”

Grimmjow’s eyes snap back at Ichigo, and he just stares at the youth, baffled by his question.

”Ya callin’ me a liar?”

”No, I just...”

Grimmjow tugs him closer, plating their lips together until Ichigo was out of breath.

”Ya can’t be this dense, seriously.” The man tells him with mild annoyed tone, before kissing him again. This time Ichigo responds to it, feeling extremely silly right now. He cannot stop himself from gasping once they separate, and his face was flushed still, but he was also smiling like a damn sap, something Grimmjow would definitely tease him about later on.

Right now though, he was too preoccupied with flipping them around and nuzzling Ichigo’s neck, quite eager on messing with him after such a long time.

Ichigo could not stop but chuckle a bit, a level of fondness swelling in his chest. Grimmjow had been so grumpy for the past few days, so seeing him be playful again was pleasant.

”Stop it! What if someone walks in on us?” Ichigo smacks the man lightly in the shoulder, and he just laughs quietly at that, pushing himself up to look down on Ichigo with that criminally charming smile of his.

”Yer being a prude again.”

Ichigo frowns at him miffed, but upon seeing the teasing smile, he could not stop but snicker.

”You haven’t called me that in a while.”

”Didn’t have a reason.” Grimmjow comments with a smirk, then rolls off Ichigo, cracking his neck.

”Though I think m’gonna have proper food first, before the dessert.” He comments with a yawn, making Ichigo glare at him.

”Really? You are comparing me to a food now?”

”Wasn’t yer name strawberry?”

Ichigo glares at him with the intensity of thousand suns now, but all it does is make Grimmjow’s grin widen.

The young man's irritation vanishes quickly however, as his stomach growls; indicating Ichigo was hungry as well.

”If I am a strawberry, that makes you a blueberry!” He comments as he pulls himself off the bed as well, gaining a snort from his companion.

”Yer gettin’ too salty fer a berry.”

Ichigo just gives him a smug smile, but it soon dissolves into a childish snicker, as he yet again realizes how dumb this conversation was.

Grimmjow says nothing, but he was still smiling with amusement in his eyes.

 

The kitchen and dining hall were empty, indicating Nel was still in her appointment, and Yoruichi and Urahara still hadn't returned. Ukitake san was likely away as well, for Ichigo had not seen him the whole day.

”The house is all ours huh?” He comments quietly, suddenly a little uneasy. Sure the house likely had top-notch security system, and given the surroundings it was in a more remote area in the mountains so it wasn’t easy to find, but still... he would’ve honestly preferred to have someone else around. Grimmjow doesn’t seem too bothered as he grabs some food from the fridge, throwing Ichigo a soda.

”Still no alcohol for me huh?” Ichigo comments amused as he cracks it open.

”Not now, given what I’m gonna do later.” Grimmjow comments casually, but the undeniable undertone in his voice made Ichigo almost spurts out his drink, and he glares at Grimmjow irritated, while the man just smirks at him lazily.

”Sides they only got sake, I doubt you like that stuff.”

Ah, that was kind of true. Ichigo was not a fan of that liquor if he was honest.

 

While eating, Ichigo could not stop but examine his companion, still a little concerned: Grimmjow was still pale and rubbed his eyes at times.

He was also swaying lightly each time he had to get up and walk.

”I’m fine. Stop staring at me like I’m dying or something.” Grimmjow finally huffs, looking at Ichigo annoyed.

The youth turns his gaze back at the food he was eating, mumbling out a sheepish apology. After they’re done, Ichigo follows Grimmjow back to the room Ichigo had woken up in, and watches as the older man slumps to the bed on his belly with a huff, momentarily looking like he wanted to go right back to sleep. A slight smirk appears on Ichigo’s face and he drops to the bed as well, resting on top of Grimmjow who groans annoyed, cracking an eyelid open and glancing at him.

”The fuck are you doing?”

”Weren’t you supposed to do something?” Ichigo asks playfully, gaining a snort from Grimmjow who closes his eyes again.

”Ya were acting all worried and shit, so I figured m’gonna take a nap first to stop you from giving me the sad puppy face.”

Ichigo hums, kissing his cheek softly.

”Alright. Should I leave?” He asks quietly, likely having a very sappy smile on his face again.

Grimmjow just hums, clearly almost asleep already.

Ichigo sighs and shakes his head, rolling off him and resting beside Grimmjow, hand gently rubbing his back.

After a moment, Grimmjow was out cold again, breathing steadily with his face turned towards Ichigo. The young man watches him sleep with a fond smile; despite their situation, this moment felt...comfortably domestic.

Overall, he had felt stable since yesterday’s childish bickering over the bunny thing.

With a sigh, Ichigo closes his eyes as well, drifting off too eventually.

 

 

_It was dark again, he could not see ahead._

_Ichigo felt his heart beat loudly in his chest._

_It was cold around him too, making it hard to breathe. He looks around cautiously._

_It was eerily quiet._

_After a moment however, he could hear something._

_Distant echoes, almost like the sound of footsteps in the rain. Panicked footsteps that seemed to be running away from something._

_Ichigo looks around again, trying to pinpoint where the sound was coming from, but it felt like it was bouncing off inside his skull into all directions. Suddenly, he felt something warm drip on him. Ichigo looks up but saw nothing._

_Then, as he looks down, he realizes to his horror there was....there was a pool of blood beneath him._

_There was no injury on him, but bits of blood were dropping from his hands._

_Ichigo stares at them, and he begins to shake, terror seeping into him. As he looks up, he spots something in the distance. Something white. He attempts to move towards the faint glow, but his legs felt like led, and the further he walked, the harder it became, until he had to slump to the ground, breathing harshly._

_The footsteps echoed in the air again, and Ichigo began to panic slowly, realizing they were heading towards him. Different kind of steps, not the pace of a scared child from before. He attempts to get up, but his body felt like it was frozen in place._

_As the anxiety grew, he attempted to yank himself free from the invisible vines holding him down._

_The laughter was echoing in the air as well._

_Ichigo knew now, whatever the voice was, the owner was heading his way, and he did not want to find out what would happen if it reached him. Struggling against the blackness clutching him, Ichigo manages to pry himself free and runs blindly towards the direction he’d seen the white glow in._

_What felt like hours, he runs blindly in the dark, until he trips and stumbles to the cold ground, again._

_He attempts to get up, panic turning his vision blotched and blurry._

_Suddenly, something big appears near him, and his vision is clouded by white._

_He looks up and realizes that the white beast was now standing above him, glaring into the darkness with the blue eyes, growling lowly at whatever was looking at them in the shadows. Ichigo glances behind him, but could not see anything._

_He felt it however, almost if someone was right behind him, just out of sight._

_The presence vanishes finally, and Ichigo releases a breath he did not know he was holding, burying himself into the white fur that now surrounds him, as the panther curls up around his shaking form._

_Ichigo shifts to turn his head, meeting those glowing blue eyes._

 

 

 

 

The young man gasps as he snaps awake, panting heavily.

His body was shaking, and it took him a moment to realize he’d been tugged into a warm hold, a hand combing through his hair.

”Calm down Kurosaki. T’s just a dream.” Grimmjow tells him quietly, and Ichigo lets out an involuntary whimper, wrapping his arms around his companion tightly, hiding his face against the man.

After what felt like ages, Ichigo finally dared to move away a bit, wiping his eyes as there were tears in them.

Gods he hated this, he hated how pathetic he looked right now.

Grimmjow says nothing, just watches him suck in deep breaths with a deep frown on his face. He could tell Kurosaki was mad at himself for this; he hated seeming so weak and wimpy, a sentiment Grimmjow understood pretty damn well.

”Why does this stuff do this to me?!” Ichigo huffs out frustrated, slumping to his back and rubbing his eyes.

”Some sorta chemical imbalance in the brain, or that’s what the mad hatter was muttering that one time.” Grimmjow comments while leaning his head against his palm as he watched his younger companion huff and puff angrily.

”Why me? Why does it have to be like this for me? I never had this before! Not even...”

Ichigo cuts himself off, realizing that perhaps now it was not a good time to think of his mom.

”Well. It’s likely my fault.”

Ichigo looks at him, clearly ready to tell the man that was bullshit, but Grimmjow pus his hand over Ichigo’s mouth, giving him a firm stare.

”I was the one who likely activated yer slumbering genetics by showing you how we fight.”

”I’ve had fights before you, they never triggered anything!”

”Then it could be a bad timing; maybe they were gonna surface at this time regardless.” Grimmjow shrugs, pulling back his hand.

”Either way, it’s likely ya could have dealt with this easier had I not popped into yer life.”

Ichigo shakes his head fiercely and turns to his side, cupping the man’s cheek. ”You are one of the best things that have happened to me. I know it sounds sappy, but...” Ichigo bites his lip and shakes his head irritated.

”....but it’s true.”

Grimmjow examines him for a moment with a stoic look, then a familiar smirk spreads on his face.

”That does sound fucking sappy.”

Before Ichigo could even attempt at defending his statement, the man leans closer and kisses him, tongue flicking against Ichigo’s lips.

”But it sorta fits given yer name.”

”For the last time, it’s not written like strawberry!” Ichigo huffs at him irritated, but he was already feeling a little easier thanks to the teasing.

”Suure, whatever, berry.”

Ichigo moves up and tackles the man, and they wrestle for a bit, until Grimmjow manages to pin him against the bed, holding his wrists in a firm grip above his head. The man chuckles, amused at the pissy look Kurosaki was aiming at him. It vanishes pretty damn quickly once Grimmjow leans closer, letting his breath brush over Ichigo’s lips.

”Stop bein’ so salty. I prefer my strawberries sweet.”

Ichigo wants to retaliate with a snarky comment, but he finds himself at a loss for words, feeling a familiar heat creep up his body. The position they were in was heavily compromising, and that was clearly purposeful from the blunet, who was now gazing at him with a familiar, predatory look.

”I did not think you were a sweet-tooth.” Ichigo comments quietly, feeling slightly hypnotized by the blue glow of Grimmjow’s eyes.

They weren’t actually glowing, but the hue in them reminded him of the panther from his dreams - it made sense, the cat was kind of a manifestation of Grimmjow anyway - and he found himself unable to look away.

”Normally I’m such a sour, salty bitch that I honestly need that in my life.” Grimmjow comments casually.

It always surprised Ichigo, to hear Grimmjow admit a flaw about himself so openly.

He would’ve rather died than stated his out loud casually like this.Then again, Grimmjow was the kind of person who did not give much fucks anymore so to say.

”What’s with all the food puns now?” Ichigo’s voice was even quieter now, and he licked his lips as Grimmjow leans closer, brushing theirs together teasingly.

”I s’ppose it’s because I kinda wanna _eat_ ya right now.”

The man nearly purrs at him, making Ichigo nearly choke on his own breath, and then glare at him with a full on flushed face, all the way to his ears.

It doesn’t last long as Grimmjow closes the space between them, and soon enough Ichigo finds himself wrapping his arms around the man, his fingers tangling into the blue locks as he kissed back about as thirstily as his companion did. It seemed that despite his weakened state, Grimmjow had more than enough energy for bedroom activities, and he swiftly got rid of Ichigo’s hoodie - well actually Grimmjow’s hoodie, the fucker still hadn’t returned it - and a shirt, nuzzling his neck afterwards and nipping it lightly.

Ichigo gasps as he feels the teeth nip his skin, his grip on the blue locks tightening briefly.

Grimmjow swipes his tongue over the slightly reddish skin now, gaining a slight moan from Ichigo, who tilts his head slightly to give him more room to explore. During the last few times he’d messed with Kurosaki, Grimmjow had learned the younger male had two particular, sensitive sweet spots; his neck and his legs, and the man was more than happy to exploit this knowledge.

Kurosaki clearly did not mind at all given the noises he was making, and the way his grip in Grimmjow’s hair tightened, holding him closer. Eventually though he has to let go, so that the man could move downwards, mouth tracing the pale skin as he went. Each touch made Ichigo shiver with warm chills going down his spine, and he had to bite his lip to silence any further embarrassing noises.

Grimmjow traces his waistline with his tongue, chuckling a bit as he hears an involuntary mewl escape Ichigo’s lips, and the youth frowns at that, clearly displeased with himself.

”Why are ya bein’ so prude now? You did not have any problem with making yerself heard last time.” Grimmjow smirks, making Ichigo glare at him.

”Last time we were alone; what if someone suddenly comes back?”

The man just rolls his eyes at Ichigo, shifting up so he could kiss that delicious, pouty mouth.

”Let ’em. It’s not like they’d be surprised.” Grimmjow near purrs at him, fingers raking down his chest and stomach, the touch making Ichigo shiver.

The hand stops at his waistband, and there was again that predatory glint on Grimmjow’s eyes, alongside a bit of mischief.

”Some of us have some sha....” Ichigo gasps, cut off mid-sentence as he feels Grimmjow’s hand sneak beneath his clothing, giving him a firm stroke.

The younger male glares up at the snickering bastard, his face flushed into a nearly brighter hue than his hair.

”Ya gotta do somethin’ about that blushing, Kurosaki. You ain’t a virgin anymore.” Grimmjow whispers into his ear, though Ichigo could tell from his tone the man was jesting. He obviously loved seeing Ichigo all flustered, especially since he was usually the cause for it.

The young man snorts, grasping the blue hair so he could pull Grimmjow back and glare at him again, though it was more of a fake pout than actual anger.

”Quit complaining, you’re ruining the mood.”

Grimmjow barks out a laugh and kisses him, all the while moving his hand again, making Ichigo gasp out loudly against his lips.

”Wasn’t complaining.”

He whispers against Ichigo’s lips with a smirk, before the young man tugs him back down for a more heated exchange. While Kurosaki still got all red about this, he was much braver with doing shit actively compared to last time, a progress Grimmjow appreciated a lot. Still, he preferred being the dominant one, so once Kurosaki’s hands began to wander a bit too much, he traps them above his head.

Ichigo voices out his complaint, but the frown doesn’t last long as Grimmjow kisses him again, the kind of dirty kiss he knew would make Kurosaki’s head spin and shut him up for the rest of it.

”You stop complainin’ and lemme take care of ya.” He purrs, licking his lips and thoroughly enjoying the way Kurosaki had gone speechless, his eyes dark.

 

 

 

Ichigo examined his hand resting beside him with weird curiosity now. His mind was pretty hazed, and he felt extremely lazy, just lying there half-tangled up to the bedsheets, naked. His skin was still flushed and warm, almost like it was glowing faintly. It was a weird fucking observation, but Ichigo did not care, he felt like being silly right now, given how good he felt. Grimmjow had fallen asleep behind him, arm draped over his companion lazily as his nose pressed into the orange hair.

He was still exhausted from the blood transfusion thing from earlier, so Ichigo wasn’t surprised he’d blacked out soon after he was done. It was fine, it felt nice to just relax there, feeling the warmth radiating against him.

Ichigo presses closer to him, and the arm draped over him slips around his waist, holding him firmly. After gazing at his hand for a few more moments, Ichigo shifts on his back, turning his head towards the sleeping form to just watch him sleep for a change. The healthy color had appeared back to Grimmjow’s face afterwards, but there were still bags under his eyes. Slowly, the youth lifts his hand to brush some loose strands of hair off the man’s face. Grimmjow doesn’t react much, just pulls him a little closer. Ichigo sighs satisfied, closing his eyes and just rests there for a moment, enjoying the quiet moment. After a while however, the nature starts calling him again, and Ichigo manages to pry himself free from the iron grip, heading to the bathroom.

Once he was done, he tugs on his boxers again, and slides Grimmjow’s hoodie on him too; since it was too big for him, it was especially warm. Gazing at the sleeping man, Ichigo contemplates what to do next. He was tempted to just to right back to the bed and lie down, but that plan is pushed aside as he hears a familiar voice from the corridor.

Ichigo walks to the door and closes it behind him, greeting Nelliel who had arrived back from her appointment.

The woman was wearing a large white had that hid her hair with just hew strands of green escaping from below it. She was also wearing a light blue scarf that also partially hid her face. Ichigo just gestures towards the room he’d come from, indicating that Grimmjow was asleep. She takes an inventory on his messy appearance and giggles quietly, making Ichigo blush again naturally. She doesn’t tease him further about it however, and the two head for the kitchen, where Nelliel makes some tea for them both.

”You know, I thought your sessions would be in this building.”

”Too risky, according to Ukitake san; besides Ryuuken-san cannot really leave his clinic for home-appointments.”

Ichigo frowns a bit, suddenly realizing the name sounded familiar. ”Ryuuken....wait...as in, Ishida Ryuuken?”

The woman blinks and nods, putting down her teacup for a moment.

”No way! That’s Uryuu’s dad!” The young man blurts out, surprised to find out about such a connection.

He then proceeds to explain to her that her doctor’s son was in fact one of his friends. Nelliel seems surprised as well, but then smiles, commenting that it was a small world.

The two chat idly for a while and she notes that Ichigo looked much better than he had when they first arrived two days ago. The teen blushes again and rubs his head, glancing involuntarily towards the room Grimmjow slept in.

”So did Shuuhei san drop you here?” Ichigo asks, as he was fairly sure they were too far from the Ishida clinic to walk there in sensible time.

”No, I use the local bus to not draw attention to myself. I even have a fake name and everything, and there is always an officer in disguise making sure I am safe.” She explains, sounding a bit miffed that she had to go around with such secrecy. Ichigo had to agree with her sentiment; they had seemingly left her alone for years, so having them do something now, after such a long time felt unlikely.

Why wait for so long?

He sincerely doubted that Aizen, or whoever would have wanted her dead, would not have found out where she was earlier.

For a brief moment the two stay silent, watching the sun set slowly over the mountains.

”It sure is late; you’d think Ukitake san or Urahara and Yoruichi would have been back by now.” Ichigo comments after a moment. Nelliel hums, pondering if they’d ran into something important.

Suddenly, there is a sound somewhere in the house, and seconds later, everything goes dark as the power abruptly cuts off.

The two look around confused, and Ichigo glances down towards the nearby city. It was already dark, so the lights down there were on. Which meant, it was not just a normal electric break.

”What is going on?” Nelliel questions, her body all tense suddenly.

Ichigo sensed something was off too, and he gets up cautiously, looking around in the dimness of the dining room and kitchen. Suddenly, a group of men cloaked in black enter the room and surround them, some seemingly holding things that looked like stunning weapons. Ichigo’s instincts kicked into a high gear, as he realized something was indeed off now.

Without thinking, he grabs the table and throws it at the men, stunning them briefly before grapping Nelliel’s hand and sprinting out of the door, heading towards the direction Grimmjow was in.

However, their path is blocked by another group, forcing Ichigo to divert into another pathway, which to his irritation ended in dead end.

He tries to think through the layout of the house quickly.

”Let’s go through the laboratory, there is an emergency exit!”

”But...Grimmjow!” Nelliel reminds him with a scared voice, edging towards the tone she had when having one of her child fits. This was bad.

Ichigo glances behind him, noting that the group was gaining in on them. They could not go back and help him. Ichigo hated this, but...

”Grimmjow can...he can handle himself.” Ichigo tells her and starts tugging her towards the laboratory, feeling a heavy weight in his heart.

The door to that room the man was sleeping was still closed like Ichigo had left it, so perhaps these strange men did not know he was there. Besides, Grimmjow could handle himself, right?

Bursting through the lab door, the two skid to a halt, realizing that there was an unknown person in a white coat, standing in the middle of the place, examining Urahara’s notes . Nelliel lets out a whimper as the pink haired man turns, flashing them a sinister smirk, different from the ones Grimmjow did. His was purely cold and mocking, the kind that made your skin tickle unpleasantly.

”My, it has been a while, has it not Nel-chan?”

”S-szayel...” She mumbles out, her eyes growing hazy as she reaches for her head, the spot her scar was.

”I must say, we should have made sure you were dead, but Nnoitra did not want to deal with your brother once he realized that brute was onto us.” Ichigo glances between the two, not really understanding the conversation.

What he did understand however, was the way Nel was holding her head, eyes wide, as if she was having a flashback.

”Ah, right; you must’ve forgotten.” The man smiles with a menacing glint to his eyes, and Ichigo puts two and two together, lifting his now furious gaze at the man.

”You! _You_ were the one who tried to kill her back then, weren’t you?!”

”Now now, let’s not be so crude, Kurosaki-kun. I was merely doing business our boss asked me to. Nnoitra was the one with a personal vendetta towards her.” The man pauses, his expression turning displeased.

”Granted, after Nel-chan survived he began to have second thoughts about our actions, so I had to deal with him as well.”

Ichigo just stares at the man, not believing what he heard.

”You...you killed your own partner?”

Szayel snorts, and brings out a gun, casually pointing it at Ichigo.

”Again, it was merely business. Nnoitra was about as unpredictable and useless to Aizen-Sama as her brutish, good-for-nothing brother.”

The young man glares at the intruder, but he did not move, knowing he was no match for the speed of a bullet.

”Oh, you seem to disagree with me, hmm?” The pink haired man smirks, pacing closer casually, gun firmly pointed at Ichigo’s head.

Nel was on the floor now, clutching her head and whimpering lightly, her entire form shaking. ”Oh please, don’t be so pathetic, that is sickening to look at!” Szayel snaps at her seemingly irritated, and Ichigo takes the opportunity to lunge forward and wrestle the gun off the man’s hand. He is clearly surprised by the young man’s actions, but before Ichigo could get rid of his weapon, Szayel swiftly throws him to the floor, smacking his head against it so hard that Ichigo’s nose began to bleed and he was seeing stars.

”How cute of you to try and defend her, but I am afraid I am on a tight schedule.”

Szayel kicks him across the floor, making Ichigo cough blood, and turns his attention to Nelliel, who was seemingly paralyzed by her own fear, stuck in a flashback as her grey eyes that had been bright previously, were now glazed and wide.

”It is a pity to be honest; I did not mind you so much, for you could make your fool of a brother to listen to reason. But alas, all good things must come to an end.” Szayel points the gun at her head, and Ichigo attempts to get up, trying to do something, anything.

Before the gun fires however, there is a commotion in the corridor that led to the lab, almost if someone was having a struggle against something, and the next thing Ichigo knew, a hurl of blue rushed at Szayel, smacking him right in the jaw and sending him fly through the air, against the glass window that separated the lab from the resting room Grimmjow had been earlier.

The gun the man had held was left alone to the floor, and Grimmjow kicks it aside.

The window cracks but doesn’t break, and the man coughs out blood as he slides to the floor, his glasses crooked on his nose. His expression looked panicked briefly, and as Ichigo looks up, finding a wild-eyed Grimmjow standing in front of shocked Nel, with a bunch of those black coated men strewn about all across the floor in the corridor, some of them with bleeding injuries. He did not blame the man for the spooked expression, if the stains on Grimmjow’s clothes were anything to go by, he’d really reaped trough them like an actual beast, which had to be a scary thought to anybody.

”I thought I smelt a sleaze ball.”

He growls, looking positively feral, and Ichigo had never felt so happy to see him.

His happiness was quickly replaced by worry, as he notes the way Grimmjow was panting, and he was clearly having a bit of trouble staying upright. A detail the unwanted visitor seemed to notice as well, as he gets up, wiping his bleeding nose and dusting off his clothes, looking at Grimmjow with an amused smile, the fear from before gone completely.

”Jeagerjaquez. You have seen better days.”

”Yer still as much of a nuisance as ever, Szayel.” Grimmjow growls lowly at him, glancing at Ichigo who was attempting to sit up again.

”And you are reckless as ever, are you?” The pink haired male chuckles.

”How the fuck did you find us?” The blunet demands from the glasses wearing man, who just brushes his hair with a sly smirk.

”My, despite her best efforts, your sister is quite easy to recognize. All we did was following her here. It was not like we weren’t aware of you and the Kurosaki boy being here as well.” Grimmjow snorts at that, and then kicks the guy behind him, attempting to reach the woman on the floor, sending him hurling across the hallway and knocking out the three attempting to sneak attack him from behind.

Once his foot lands to the ground again however, he almost stumbles, and Szayel’s smirk grew as he realizes just how weakened the man was.

Swiftly, he moves forward and kicks Grimmjow in the gut, making him cough and collapse to the floor, glaring up at the man, who just smacks him hard in the face, knocking the blunet sideways and away from Nel. It was clear to Ichigo now, that Szayel was a superhuman like Grimmjow. No normal man could smack Grimmjow around like that, not even when he was weakened.

”Well well, is our little kitty feeling under the weather now?” The glassed man mocks the blunet, who just spits out blood and attempts to get up, his body straining with effort. Szayel just kicks him again, clearly enjoying the fact just how weakened his former comrade was.

Too focused on taunting him, the pinky doesn’t notice how Ichigo had managed to gain his bearings again, reaching for the gun on the floor and grabbing it, attempting to fire at Szayel. Having never used a firearm before, the shot lands far too high, but it gains the man’s attention enough so that Grimmjow can kick him to the knees, making the man buckle to the floor, only for Grimmjow to punch him in the face again, sending him slide across the floor.

Grimmjow breathes harshly, and Nelliel seems to finally snap out of her trance as she rushes to aid her brother, helping him to get up.

”We gotta get out of here.” Grimmjow states between harsh breaths, and the two nod, heading towards the emergency exit with Nelliel giving support for her brother.

However, that is when yet another group busts in trough their escape route, forcing them to the floor. Grimmjow attempts to get rid of the guys holding him, but he was far too weakened to do anything of the sort, and just coughs out more blood.

”You truly are a brute. That hurt.” Szayel comments casually, rubbing his jaw as he gets back up, and walks to the downed man now, kicking him in the gut again.

”But we are not here for you in any case.” The man continues, and turns towards Ichigo, who was pulled up to his knees by the men holding him. His heartbeat was rapid, and his entire body shook uncontrollably from adrenaline.

”We came to get you, Kurosaki boy.”

Ichigo’s eyes widen, and he could even see the siblings look at him in shock, before Grimmjow’s face twists into an angry frown, and he actually manages to shake off the guys holding him, only to be forced to the floor again, coughing out more blood.

Shit, again, this looked bad.

”I swear, ya bastard, if you hurt ’im I _will_ fucking kill you!” Grimmjow snarls furiously at Szayel, who looks down at him condescendingly.

Ichigo cannot stop but notice however, that the man also kept his distance from Grimmjow now.

”You like to run that mouth of yours a lot. Do not worry, Aizen-Sama has great plans for the kid.”

He picks up his gun again, aiming it at Grimmjow’s head. The blue eyes just stare at him with no ounce of fear in them. ”Too bad you won’t be there to see it.”

” _Wait!_ ” Ichigo’s desperate cry gains everyone’s attention, and the pink haired man turns to look at Ichigo, whose eyes were wide with worry.

”If I come with you voluntarily, will you let them live?” The pink haired man turns to look at Ichigo displeased.

”Why would I take such a bargain? These two are a liability.”

”Are they though. Your boss must’ve known where they were this whole time, right? Why did he not do anything?” Ichigo challenges the man, hoping to buy time. He did not know what for, but he could not let this guy shoot Grimmjow or Nel.

The man seems to contemplate on his words with a hum, holding his chin.

”Aizen must have had a reason to let them live for this long.”

The man remains quiet for a moment, then shrugs, turning his attention back to their hostages.

”That may be true, but he also said they are now expendable.” Before he could pull out his gun again however, a man rushes in through the door, informing that the officers had arrived back, with backup.

”We have to go now, Szayel-san!” The man huff irritated, and glances down at Grimmjow miffed.

Then, after looking around briefly, he grabs a vial from the table, and for Ichigo’s confusion, injects it onto the man, before kicking him aside. ”That should do it. Let’s see how long you can survive with that in your veins! Seeing you suffer is honestly more preferable to a quick death anyway.” The man lets out a chilling laugh, and Ichigo abruptly realizes what the man had done, was likely inject Urahara’s imperfect - and therefore lethal - formula on Grimmjow.

He looks at the blunet desperately, before a wet cloth is placed over his mouth, a sweet scent dulling his senses rapidly. Last thing he heard and saw was Nelliel’s desperate cry, as she seemed to realize as well what Szayel had done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY SHIT I finally came up with how to end this thing.  
> Not the chapter, but the story overall.
> 
> It came to me like lightning from the clear sky (A fitting metaphor given I went to see Thor yesterday)  
> And quite frankly, prepare yourselves for it is gonna be quite a ride. I'm likely only making three to four chapters more for this now that I know what the end-game is.  
> Also, there is a bit of foreshadowing, kinda, sorta, a little bit, in this chapter on what will happen in the future.  
> But I won't tell what it is.  
> Thor influences in the title for this chapter too apparently.


	19. revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo is discovering some serious secrets about his past, including yet another connection he never expected.  
> Grimmjow turns out to be not what ichigo thought he was.

When Grimmjow came to, his entire body hurt like a bitch.

He tried to recall what had happened. Had he been in a match recently?

Nah, that wasn’t it. There were noises around him, alongside a quiet sobbing sound, a sound he was all too familiar with.

With great effort, the man forces his eyes open, and at first, everything was a blur. Then, a familiar pair of hazel eyes appears next to him, wide with shock and worry.

”Thank god, you’re alive!” She sobs, attempting to hug him, but then stops herself realizing it would likely be a bad idea.

”It was a lucky break, the vial he used happened to only have saltwater in it.”

Another familiar voice; it as the mad hatter.

Grimmjow tilts his head, finding the said man walking towards the bed with a frown on his face. Tia was beside him too, and for once she was not stoic either, clear relief in her eyes.

”....The hell happened?”

”They attacked the mansion while we were away; they’d arranged some sort of car crash to the road that slowed our return. In all likeness one of Aizen’s goons had recognized your sister and followed her there.”

Tilting his head to the other side, it was the tan skinned woman, deep frown on her face as she crossed her arms.

”Where are we?”

”At the local hospital; we arrived only moments after they left.” Yoruichi pauses, and looks at him apologetically.

”We lost track of them.”

”T-they took Ichigo! I don’t know why.” Nelliel whimpers desperately, clawing her hair as her hands shook, and she was clearly trying to calm down, but failing at it. Urahara just looks at Harribel, who gently coaxes Nel out of the room to help her settle down.

”This was an unexpected situation. While I was aware of Aizen potentially having an interest in Kurosaki...”

” _Unexpected?_ ”

Grimmjow cuts Urahara off, pulling himself up and glaring at the man with such an intense stare that even Yoruichi had to take a subconscious step back as she saw it.

”Are you fucking kidding me?! The whole reason we went into hiding with him was because you thought that bastard might have an interest towards him! Now yer telling me this was _unexpected_?!”

”Please, calm down Jeagerjaquez san. Getting angry will not help solve the situation.”

Grimmjow just near growls at him, then attempts to get off the bed, only to be forced to slump back down as nausea hit him.

”Please try to stay put; your injuries were pretty bad.” Yoruichi tells the man, who just glares at her now.

”Settle down? While Kurosaki is who knows where, with that pervert bastard doing who knows what to him? Hell no!”

Urahara sighs, he had been expecting this reaction. It was the same fierce fury the man had displayed back when Nelliel’s blight had been discovered.

”We are already working on tracking him down. The security cameras captured the car he was taken off with, and several officers are already doing ground searches go the places we know Aizen has influence over.” Urahara attempts to calm the angered male, which clearly isn’t working as Grimmjow turns to look at him like he wants to strangle the man.

”You guys fucked up, again.”

His tone was accusing and cold, making both of them flinch; Grimmjow was right.

”Why the hell should I trust in you bringing ’im back safely?” It was a good question.

 

 

 

Ichigo found himself inside a white room, under a blinding light, strapped to a chair. He was stripped to his pants now, and it was chilly, but he just bit his lip, refusing to show his discomfort. The young man prayed in his head that Grimmjow was still alive. If what that glasses wearing maniac had injected to Grimmjow what Ichigo thought he had....

No, he had to be alive.

Ichigo shakes his head to push the awful thought away from his mind, just as the door opens, and the said pinky bastard walks in the room, having changed his white coat into another, similar white coat, only this one was clean now.

”I see we are awake.” He mock greets Ichigo, stopping in front of the young man, who glares up at him defiantly. The man just holds his arms behind his back, examining the young man from head to toe.

”I must say, you don’t seem as impressive as what Aizen-sama’s enthusiasm would have one to believe.”

A sharp finger pokes Ichigo’s forehead, nearly making him flinch.

”On the outside, you look like your average youngling you can see anywhere if you just bother to look around.”

”Well I am sorry to disappoint you, princess.” Ichigo snorts, fully expecting the man to smack him or something, but Szayel just laughs, the cold cackle from before, and he pats Ichigo’s shoulder in a mock-friendly manner, before turning his attention to the device in his hand.

He fiddles around with the thing for a bit, until it brought up an image of Ichigo, which looked a bit creepy given it was more of an x-ray image, showcasing his innards.

”You are one lucky boy, Kurosaki-kun; your mother’s genetics have created such a unique cocktail in you, making your dna highly valuable.”

Ichigo did not like the man’s tone, and it reminds him of the way Grimmjow had referred to his kind like they were cattle, more useful in harvesting their blood than actually being an active soldier.

”It will take a little while to crack all the codes from this unique combination, but with my intellect it should not take too long.”

A mad scientist type huh?

”Why bother taking me if you only needed my dna? If you are such a genius, you would have found a way to easily snatch some. Hell, just sneak by the school and steal gym clothes or something, or was that too archaic for your genius brain?”

This gets Szayel to whip around displeased; he clearly did not like his intelligence being mocked.

”Watch your mouth boy! You are alive only because Aizen wants to see you in action first.” Ichigo snorts, attempting to free his hands, but the rope around his wrists was too tight.

”I’m not gonna become his dancing monkey, so just kill me right now.”

Within seconds, the man was right at his face, a scalpel -this guy really loved his scientist shtick - pressed against Ichigo’s throat, while a hand grabbed his orange locks, yanking his head backwards painfully.

”Trust me, I shall enjoy cutting you to pieces once this is over. I have no desire to keep that brute’s fuck-toy alive and in my hands any longer than necessary!”

Ichigo just stares back at him, strangely not feeling afraid despite what he would have expected given the past few months. This guy really did not like Grimmjow, huh?

”Why? You scared or something?”

Szayel smacks him hard, enough to make Ichigo’s ears ring and vision blur, and he coughs out blood.

”Why would I be scared of that brutish fool?! I am far superior to him with my intellect alone; hence Aizen-sama still appreciates my efforts greatly!”

”Yet he forced you to go and be a runner and pick me up.”

Another hit, and this time Ichigo and his chair fall to the floor, making him see stars.

Szayel breathes harshly for a few moments, and then brushes through his hair to calm down. ”His appalling attitude clearly has rubbed off on you.”

Ichigo says nothing to that; his head was still too hazy from the impact. Szayel yanks him back upright, making Ichigo’s head spin worse, and he almost wants to vomit.

”Try to hold your tongue a bit better; your blood is too valuable to be lost in such amounts.” Szayel tells him with a mock-patronizing tone, wiping the blood off Ichigo’s face with a cloth and putting it on some sort of a container afterwards. After that, he pats Ichigo’s cheek, telling him to get comfortable as he’d be there in a while, before heading out of the room and closing the door behind him, leaving injured Ichigo sitting alone in the white room, his head still hurting.

 

 

 

 

Grimmjow was spitting mad. He was pacing around the room he was kept in the hospital, unable to just lie down.

Given his healing factor he didn’t really have to anyway, but the nurses would have liked him to stay put given they did not know that.

They’d stopped trying to get him to cooperate after he’d given a particularly terrifying stare at the latest nurse who’d attempted to get him to go back to bed. Nelliel was in the room too, having calmed down now. Her brother looked like a caged animal right now, itching to sink his claws into something, or someone. It was... a little unnerving to look at, but she knew that nothing she could say would help right now, so the woman left him be.

”Where could they have taken him?” Harribel muses quietly, so that only the green haired lady beside her could hear.

”I do not know...Aizen has so many places he could use for whatever he wanted Ichigo for.”

”What would that be then, though?” Tia holds her chin, glancing at Grimmjow who’d stopped to lean his back against the wall, rubbing his eyes as being this angry for so long took a lot of energy out of him physically alone.

”Well...I guess he’d want to test Ichigo’s blood and dna.”

”He could have gotten that without the need to kidnap the boy. Why wait this long?”

Tia had a good point, Nel had to admit.

Likely Aizen had known about Ichigo’s unusual genetics a while before they did, so the fact the man had waited for such a long time, then kidnapped him, it had to mean something. She looks up at her brother again; her heart hurt seeing him like this.

Just moments ago he’d been almost happy.

Tired, but happy.

Now he was swinging between anger, desperation, and bits of that exhaustion, the kind that told you he was tired on life itself. He was tired of dealing with its bullshit.

”Perhaps.... he wanted to see first-hand, what kind of difference Kurosaki’s genetics have to ours. In action to be exact, how does it work in practice?” Tia comments after a moment of silence, and now both siblings look up at her.

”That...could be it. But if that was so, why kidnap him at all? Likely he could have just watched from afar when Grimm trained with Ichigo.”

”He panicked.” Both women look up at Grimmjow, who paces back to his bed, sitting down on it and leaning his arms against his knees, rubbing his eyes.

”Urahara was gonna erase Ichigo’s superhuman genetics altogether, so he wanted ta get his hands on them before it happened. Likely he ain't got enough data given how fuckin's slow Ichigo's progress was.”

Nelliel could not stop but lift eyebrow at the fact Grimmjow referred to the fiery haired male as ’Ichigo’ for the first time.

Usually he used the surname, or some sort of teasing nickname. It showcased just how important the boy had become to him, and how worried he was right now.

”That is likely true, which means he must have been brought to a laboratory of sorts, where his abilities can be tested.” Harribel concludes, crossing her arms. Before either of the siblings could comment on that, the door opens, and Urahara steps back in, this time followed by Ichigo’s family.

Isshin was unusually serious, whereas Yuzu was holding back tears. The black haired girl was also distraught, though calmer than her sister. ”They wished to hear from you what exactly happened. I did not inform Kurosaki-san’s friends just yet, but likely I’ll have to do that too.” Urahara explains the family presence, and Karin glares at Grimmjow, her stare reminescent of Ichigo’s irritated look.

”I thought you’d protect our big brother! The hat guy said you would!” She yells at the man accusingly all of a sudden, making the room turn quiet.

Yuzu gasps and covers her mouth, then tells Karin that was uncalled for.

”How so? If he’s really as tough as he acts—”

” _Shut._ The _fuck._ Up. Kid.”

Karin closes her mouth, tensing as the blue eyes peered at her. She held her ground regardless, looking right back at the man.

”I was weakened because I’d had blood transfusion just hours ago. Even I don’t recover from that in a fucking instant. Ya think yer the only one pissed off about this?” Grimmjow near growls at her, making Karin take a step back, noting just how angry the man looked like. She’d never seen anyone with such a feral glare.

”....What Grimm is trying to say, is that he is angry at himself too for not being able to do anything.” Nelliel explains softly, wanting to diffuse the situation before the man would actually do something to the girl.

Karin gazes at her for a moment, then nods, glancing at Grimmjow with a frown.

”Can you please tell us what happened exactly?” Yuzu asks softer after a moment, and as the blue eyes drift at her, Grimmjow’s gaze softens.

Between the two siblings, he would’ve felt bad scaring the ginger one, she could not take it as well as her loudmouthed sister. Plus, her haircolor might have made him a bit more lenient towards her.

”Doubt I can tell all of it to ya brats.”

”We can handle it.” Yuzu puts on a brave face, but Grimmjow was too accustomed on reading people and spotting signs of fear. She hid it so badly.

”Your brother and I, we were chatting in the kitchen after I returned from my appointment.” Nel began, brushing through her hair and biting her lip, trying to keep it together. Harribel places an encouraging hand on her shoulder, squeezing it lightly. ”Grimm was...asleep as he was still recovering, when...when they appeared.” She sucks in a deep breath and described the events that transpired.

Grimmjow eventually takes it from her, as once they get to Szayel, her eyes start to turn watery and she has to lean into Harribel, who soothes her with a hug and pets her hair.

”When I woke up the fuckin’ place was swarmed by them. I managed to deal with the most, but I was still dizzy as hell, so...” He huffs, rubbing his eyes, clearly frustrated. ”That bastard noticed it. The only reason he even dared ta go against me directly was ’cause he thought I would be too weak to fight back.”

”Was this man not also a superhuman though? Why would he care about whenever you fought back or not?” Isshin questions, holding his chin thoughtfully.

Harribel and Grimmjow glance at each other now, having a silent discussion.

”Szayel never liked getting his hands dirty. Although...” the blond woman glances at the two girls, uncertain if she should talk about this next bit while they were in the room.

”He’s scared o’ me.” All eyes turn on Grimmjow now, who’d leaned his arms to his knees now, so that his hair shadowed his face. A slight, unnerving grin had appeared on his face, and in the dim lighting of the room, he suddenly looked positively menacing.

”Szayel has never fought a match once in his life. He’s a sly, sleazy tactician who rather makes others do his dirty work, usin’ underhanded tactics instead of facin’ people head on.” Grimmjow’s tone was chilling, hinting at just how much he despised the pink haired man right now. Once he lifts his gaze, Yuzu backs away to hide behind her dad lightly, and even Karin swallows down nervously.

Just what the heck has her brother gotten involved with?

”He knows he’d die if he took me head on.” His grin was positively crazy right now, but Grimmjow did not care.

He was seeing red, and it was a bad sign, he was too angry and thus could not control how his expression looked.

”We should give him a moment.” Harribel states, getting up as she catches what was going on. The Kurosaki family looks at her confused at first, but Urahara senses the potential danger in the room as well, and coaxes them to leave.

A moment after the door closes to the room Harribel could hear something large collide with the wall, indicating Grimmjow had thrown the bed against the wall, likely breaking it to pieces.

”What the hell is wrong with your brother? He looked so scary all of a sudden!” Karin asks from the green haired woman, glancing at her sister who was still pacing nervously, clearly freaked out by what she’d just seen and heard.

”He is too angry right now. Grimmjow.... he actually has his own side-effects from his unique dna.”

Harribel explains, making Karin look at her confused.

”Grimmy has an awful temper. When he gets really angry, he can be scary.” Nelliel mutters out, her voice more childlike than usual, and her eyes were still wide and slightly panicked, prompting Harribel to gently pet her back and hair, shushing her again.

”He’s always had an awful temper based on my observations.” Karin informs the women, but then Isshin grasps her shoulder, and shakes his head quietly as the girl looks up at her dad questioningly. The man looks up at Urahara and Yoruichi, who were currently talking with Ukitake san and Shuuhei, all four of them looking highly serious.

At that moment, Isshin wished he’d just told Ichigo the truth sooner; perhaps this whole mess could have been avoided.

It was too late now however.

 

 

 

Ichigo did not know how long he’d sat there, but by the time the door opened again, his wrists hurt from trying to release himself from the bindings. Looking at the newcomer, it was a blond man with a similar robe to what Szayel wore. His other eye was covered by a black eyepatch, and he releases Ichigo briefly only to handcuff his arms behind his back again, and then tugs him to his feet, showing him towards the door. Ichigo takes an inventory on the man with a side-glance, and notes he seemed slightly distracted, like he did not want to be there. He did not look directly at Ichigo even once, and while he had a gun on his belt, the man was not exactly holding his hand near it to grab the weapon if necessary, with the way he held his arms behind his back.

The corridor they were walking across was about as plain and sterile as the room he’d been in. The halogen lights were bright, hurting his eyes, and it was chilly.

There were some doors along the way, all sealed tight.

They arrive to an intersection; Ichigo notes one side was lit up, while the right side was dark, as if the lightbulbs had burned out there. That corridor was also full of stuff, like it had been going through renovations before the place was suddenly abandoned. There was a door in the middle of this corridor, and the blond man steps forward, pulling out a keycard. Ichigo realizes this was his chance, so he suddenly kicks the guy, making him stumble backwards, and quickly kicks the gun as far away as possible, before sprinting across the corridor, towards the darker parts. The man yells and starts chasing after him once he gets back up, so Ichigo knocks the steel shelves and other things down along the way, slowing his pursuer down.

He skids and turns at the next intersection, not really knowing where he was running, but the young man knew he needed to find a spot to hide for a bit. Ichigo spots a slightly open door at one of the dead-end, smaller corridors and diverts in there, hiding behind the door and waiting quietly, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. His pursuer stops nearby, then pulls out something and talks quietly, likely informing his boss that their captive had escaped.

Ichigo began to feel anxious as the footsteps came closer, but after a while they started to turn distant, as the man walks past the spot he was in.

Moments later, a loud alarm sound echoed in the building, and Ichigo could hear large rumbling sound and electric sizzling and clacking metal from all around him. It sounded like somebody was sealing the place in, likely to prevent Ichigo from leaving the building. The young man bites his lip and looks around in the dim room; while the corridors were almost completely dark, this room had few emergency type lights at the floor illuminating his way.

It looked like a doctor’s office with computers, that chair you saw at a dentist’s office, shelves with some equipment, and so on. There was also a computer like elsewhere, but it was turned off, and the monitor was broken. Ichigo sighs and looks trough the equipment, hoping to find something to get rid of his handcuffs. Sure enough, there was an old scalped at the shelves, but since he could not use his hands, Ichigo grasps the metallic instrument with his teeth, noting it tasted rusty. Ichigo walks to the weird chair and drops the thing off his mouth onto it, so he could properly pick it up with hands behind his back. It takes some effort, but Ichigo eventually manages to unlock the damn things, and they drop to the floor with a loud clanging sound. The young man freezes and listens quietly, but there were no footsteps heading towards the room. Likely the blond was not nearby at the moment.

Ichigo releases a deep sigh and looks around again. Just what was this place exactly?

It looked like some sort of giant scientific laboratory.

He gets up and notes suddenly that there was something covered by old, white and stained curtains. Cautiously, Ichigo pulls them aside and realizes there was another room there behind this one. It was different from the laboratory behind him. This one almost looked like a normal hospital room with a proper bed, chairs, and a sink and so on. It even had a dusty fake plant at the corner. What catches Ichigo’s attention was the crib. There was…an actual baby crib on this room for some reason. Why would this place have something like this? It was creepy as all hell. Ichigo examines the crib for a bit, then notices that the canvas on it had some writing in it.

His eyes widen, as he realizes that the fainted canvas marker writing was familiar.

His mum had written their names into their baby blankets for each of the Kurosaki kids when they’d been born.

That text…it was done exactly the way their mum would have.

Ichigo thinks back of what his dad had revealed about Masaki; was this place the one her mum was kept? If that was true….then that crib… Ichigo shakes his head, knowing it was too early to jump to conclusions. The baby crib and the blanket did not necessarily mean anything. He picks up the blanket and dusts it to see what the text said.

“Grimm?”

Ichigo blinks confused, then his eyes widen.

Grimm.

Grimmjow.

He looks around in shock.

“What the hell is going on here!?”

Suddenly, Ichigo realizes there was something weird in the room; a large glass window covered the opposite wall that seemed to have an observation room behind it.

Ichigo frowns and walks to the door that led in there.

It had no handle, just one of those keycard panels. However, the door was slightly ajar, and with a bit of pushing, Ichigo managed to squeeze trough. That room had a table and some shelves with a lot of dusty documents on them. There was also a computer, but like in the first room, it was turned off. Ichigo walks to the shelves and looks trough the documentation there.

He soon spots a familiar name there, and pulls out the file that had “Grimmjow” written on it.

Ichigo brings it to the floor where the emergency lights shone so he could read it. As he opens the file, the first thing he finds is a photograph. Ichigo picks it up cautiously, just staring at it in shock. The baby in the photo was clearly Grimm based on the wildly colored hair, but what shocked Ichigo was the person holding him. It was…it was mum.

She was likely a teen there given how young she looked, but she was holding sleeping baby Grimmjow with a smile on her face. Ichigo looks trough more of the old file, and finds more photos, some that confuse him greatly.

There is one of the blue haired baby, he was resting inside some sort of futuristic glass pod, with wires attached to his tiny frame.

As Ichigo examines the picture even further, he suddenly realizes that something was weird, aside from the whole setting; Grimmjow’s fingers had strange, black claws on them instead of human nails. Ichigo puts the photo away and looks at another one, this one was again with Masaki. She was sitting next to the crib, smiling as the blunet baby reached over the edge and grasped her pinky, looking at her with bright blue eyes. His eyes were strange too; they had slits, like a cat.

“What is going on?”

His eyes drift back at the file itself, and Ichigo picks it up, attempting to read the old text. The paper was yellowed and fragile, and the text had faded overtime, but he managed to make out some bits.

_“Codename; Pantera is growing well. Behavioral issues have been progressed with thanks to subject M.K. It is recommended to let M.K handle any unwanted emotional responses regarding to the child.”_

What the hell?

Why was there a file about Grimmjow with weird baby pictures on it that had his mom in them?

Why did baby Grimmjow have weird claws and eyes in some?

The language in the text itself was like it was ripped straight out of a science fiction novel. Ichigo’s eyes drift back at the image with the baby Grimm in a pod. He bites his lip, then gets up and searches trough the cabinets more, until he spots what he thought he would find. A file that said “Masaki” on it. Ichigo takes it and sits back down, looking through it. There were images of his mother in a hospital gown, looking all sickly, and mask wearing doctors poking at her. It made Ichigo’s stomach turn, so he turned his attention to the text.

It was even harder to read, but he managed to make out something.

_“Subject M.K is responding to the hollow-serum well; no significant side-effects aside from slight anemia.”_

His dad had not been kidding when they’d told Ichigo his mum had been experimented on. How did his mum connect to Grimmjow though? Did those photos mean….

Suddenly, a bright light appears in the room, and Ichigo covers his eyes briefly as it hurt after sitting in such darkness for so long.

“Ahh, it seems you found something interesting while exploring.”

Szayel claps at the doorway, with the blond man beside him, pointing a gun at Ichigo.

“What the hell are these files? Why is my mum in them?” Ichigo demands from the man as he gets up, still shielding his eyes.

“What? Are you worrying that you’ve been sleeping with your half-brother or something?” Szayel asks with an amused, mocking smile, and Ichigo just stares at him, and waiting for an answer.

“Relax, in that sense you have not done anything immoral; your mother merely took care of him for a bit, before she escaped from our grasp thanks to your father and his little friends.” Ichigo had to admit, he breathed a slight sigh of relief, because the evidence so far had been pretty damning.

“Then what the hell are those files?”

Szayel watches him amused, slowly pacing towards Ichigo, who backs away, clearly a little freaked out by what he saw and read.

“They are what they are. It is essentially that brute’s birth-certificate.”

Suddenly the man lunges forward, and hits Ichigo with what seemed to be a paralyzer, and the young man slumps to the floor as his muscles refused to cooperate thanks to the shock given to him.

“You see, Grimmjow is not a human like us. He was born here.”

Szayel gestures around them.

“Right in this lab. Aizen-sama created him right here, and later his so-called sister, Nel-chan.”

Ichigo attempts to say something, but even his tongue was paralyzed, and a moment later, Ichigo blacks out.

 

 

 

When Ichigo came to, he was in another room, strapped into the weird dentist chair with cuffs on his arms and legs.

The blond man was standing at the door, while there was an identical pair of big guys that seemed sort of like weird, giant man-baby-looking bodyguards to the pink haired man, given they remained on either side of him.

Szayel was currently typing something up on one of the computers, and the blond man has to cough to gain his attention, informing him that Ichigo was awake.

”Are we feeling more cooperative now, Kurosaki-kun?”

Ichigo just stares at him.

The man sighs dramatically, complaining how Grimmjow was being a bad influence on him.

“Aizen-sama should have made him less aggressive if you ask me, but I suppose it was useful for what he was made for, to have that bloodthirst.” Szayel pauses, as he pulls out a needle, making Ichigo tense a little.

“Then again, I am certain the ATTITUDE was unneeded.”

As he notices the way Ichigo was looking at the syringe in his hands, the man smirks amused.

”Relax, I am just going to take a blood sample for now, providing you did not lose all of it earlier for your insolent behavior. Likely not, given how quickly you managed to sprint away from Tesla. Not that I am surprised, he is as useless as his previous superior.” The blond man glances at the pink haired lunatic with a slight displeased frown, clearly taking offence on the comment, but he says nothing.

Ichigo flinches as the man jabs the needle into his arm none too gently, drawing out a bit of blood and then walking with it to the computer likely to analyze it.

”So you went through all this just to look at my blood?”

”This is just a first step; I have further plans for you, be a bit more patient.” Szayel tells him casually without even looking at the young man strapped to the chair.

”So is your boss gonna show up or what?”

Ichigo asks after a moment of silence, figuring that perhaps he could coax the guy into talking, he seemed like the type. ”Aizen-sama has no time to waste in side projects like this. I shall record my findings for him and later dispose of you.” Szayel snorts at him, typing on his computer again.

 

 

 

Ichigo was not sure how long he was strapped in that damned thing, but it sure as hell felt like hours.

Szayel had poked and prodded him some more, even making the mistake of bringing his hand too close to Ichigo’s mouth, prompting the young man to bite him. Szayel had yet again complained about Grimmjow’s influence on him, and kept making vague remarks about the blunet being some sort of science project. It was unnerving to listen, especially given how the man refused to tell Ichigo anything further about it, clearly enjoying the fact the young man desired to know and was denied it. Eventually, the crazy scientist injected him with something despite Ichigo’s resistance, and afterwards the other man - Tesla - had brought Ichigo to the dark room he was currently in.

It at least had a mattress, so he didn’t have to lie on the cold ground. Ichigo just lied there for a moment, his head spinning still. Whatever Szayel had injected on him, it was making Ichigo dizzy.

_Why are you just lying there?_

Ichigo sits up abruptly, his heartbeat quickening. It was the voice again.

_This is pathetic. You could have escaped if you tried harder._

Ichigo clutches his head, trying to close the voice off from his mind.

The eerie laugh not quite his own echoed inside his head, and Ichigo covers his ears, telling it to leave him alone.

_Why should I? It doesn’t seem like you can do anything by yourself. He would be ashamed of you right now._

”Shut up!”

Ichigo tells the voice out loud, and briefly everything goes quiet. Then, a wave of dizziness passes over him again, and his vision turns blurry and blotched, weird images flashing in front of his eyes. Ichigo could feel his heartbeat raise and his breathing quicken, and he knew this had to be another fit, only it was much worse than before. He slumps to the floor, trying to make the awful noise in his head stop.

Ichigo recalls an advice Urahara had given him earlier, and tries to focus his mind.

It was hard, but eventually he could picture it, the white, blue eyed panther. It watches him from afar, slightly transparent and occasionally disappearing, as Ichigo’s mind was not clear enough. He focuses harder, just trying to think of that cat and drive away all the cacophony in his brain right now. Bit by bit, the laughter and noise dies down, and the feline comes closer. Ichigo’s breathing slows down, and his heartbeat slows as well.

Urahara’s idea was actually working.

Soon, the feline was very close, close enough for Ichigo to reach for it, figuratively speaking. Except, once he does, the white being dissolves and the laughter erupts again, echoing all around him, until he felt like his head was splitting in two. His body felt weird and tingly, and Ichigo began to twitch uncontrollably. The laughter started to sound strange, much clearer than just a distant echo.

It was not an echo.

The sound was coming from his own throat, a mad cackle he could not stop.

_That’s it; let it all out, will you?_

The voice now whispers into his ear, but Ichigo doesn’t respond. Instead, he starts clawing at the ground, until his fingers bled and there were deep scratches on the floor. What was happening? Why couldn’t he stop? There was a distant sound from somewhere behind him, a door opening or so. Ichigo gets up shakily, turning around, but unable to see a thing.

It was as if somebody had pulled a blotchy, black and red veil over his eyes.

Yet, he knew, somebody was in the room, and they were getting closer.

He did not like it.

Ichigo lets out a fierce cry, his voice strangely feral, and he jumps blindly at whoever had entered the room, punching and clawing at it with all of his might. Whatever it was, it was a threat.

Threats had to be eliminated.

Soon, there was something red running down his hands, some of it smeared on his face. Ichigo heard another distant noise, almost if someone was clapping.

Slowly, his head begun to clear, and his eyes widen in horror. He was covered in blood, currently sitting on top of the bloodied, blond haired man whose face he’d positively smashed in. He was still breathing, but barely.

Szayel was standing further away, clearly pleased by his experiment. ”It seems my little parasite did its job. I can cause frenzy on you remotely, and it doesn’t add any stress to your body thanks to your genes being natural due to inheritance. Aizen-sama must be pleased about these results.”

Ichigo just stares at the man in disbelief; this...lunatic had used his underling as a test subject for...whatever the hell this sick test had been.

”No need to look so sour; Tesla has gone through worse.”

Ichigo moves off from the man swiftly and backs away, looking at his bloodied hands panicked.

Maybe he’d pointed a gun at Ichigo, but he’d just been doing his job. He...never meant to attack him like this.

Ichigo began to shake, but he was no longer sure with what. Anger, fear, or just some sort of pure aggression? As Szayel’s voice breaks through the noise in Ichigo’s head again, he slowly turns towards the man, who was currently belittling Tesla, who was attempting to get up but failing.

”Truly, you are as useless as Nnoitra was, perhaps I should just let you perish, would make this much easier.”

Red clouded his vision, and a tiny part of Ichigo wondered if this was how Grimmjow’s trances were like. He did not have much time to contemplate on it, as the next second he pounces on to the sick bastard, knocking him to the floor and attempting to hit him in that smug face of his. Before he could however, a violent shock travels through his system, and Szayel swiftly shoves Ichigo off him, holding a device he’d used.

”Behave now, little dog. That parasite has more nasty surprises in storage in case you feel like doing that again.”

Szayel warns him with a smirk, although it was not as wide as usual.

He’d clearly been taken off guard again.

Ichigo attempts to get up, but the current appears again, forcing him paralyzed on the floor.

”You better cool down for now; I still have few tests to do for you.”

Szayel tells him, taking in a deep breath and straightening himself. He claps his hands, and his two identical big assistants drag the twitching, paralyzed Ichigo away back into the room he’d originally been in.

”....You’ll die.”

Szayel glances down at Tesla miffed, who just coughs out blood, and grins at him.

”Once Jeagerjaquez sees what you did to the boy...he’ll do the same to you he did to Antenor. Your days are numbered….”

Szayel snorts at that, but the blond man could see the slight uneasy shift in the man’s posture. ”I am not the kind of fool like Luppi was who’d try and get into a beast’s face to challenge them.” Tesla lets out a raspy laugh, and then coughs out more blood.

”Don’t lie to yourself. You will be dead either way after this is done. I hope he gets you before Aizen does.”

” _Enough!_ ”

Szayel spats at the man and kicks him in the head, getting blood on his boot. He breathes harshly for a few seconds, trying to calm him down.

He was....he was NOT afraid of that brute.

That…hideous, mutated THING Aizen-sama had created because he’d thought he’d have to start this project from scratch. Just because he saw what happened to Luppi....

Szayel shakes his head and looks down at Tesla.

The man was no longer moving; his injuries had been pretty bad already, but apparently his kick had dislocated the man’s neck.

”Tsch. Serves you right, go right after your master, dog.”

As the twin servants appear back, Szayel instructs them to take the body and dispose of it, while he heads back to the laboratory. While he was NOT afraid of that brute, Szayel knew there was a possibility the man would find them; his gut told him that that bastard Jeagerjaquez was not dead yet.

A hellbeast like what Aizen had created would not go down that easily, at best it was slowed down before it was right after him again.

Szayel knew had to come up with something if that would happen.

He pauses at the laboratory door, and realizes he had a perfect way of dealing with the man.

Glancing back towards the direction his underlings had brought his test subject, Szayel could not stop but grin.

The perfect weapon.

 

 

 

 

Grimmjow had eventually calmed down, and he was now just sitting on the floor, rubbing his eyes and eventually tilting his head back against the wall. The bed he’d slept in was completely trashed, there was a dent on the wall, and the mirror had broken alongside the sink.

The cops had likely told the staff not to come in for now, knowing they’d just get hurt if they tried to stop his rampage.

Fuck, he’d never had this much trouble in controlling his fits.

Not even when Nel... He shakes his head, knowing that thinking about this would just make things worse.

The door opens quietly, and he glances up, finding Harribel enter the room. She walks to him, standing over him with arms crossed as usual. Grimmjow doesn’t bother moving, just keeps his gaze to the floor.

”They believe Kurosaki was brought to one of Aizen’s secret laboratories. We are currently looking through the known ones to try and pinpoint which one Szayel likely went to.”

She tells him calmly, gaining no response. The woman was not surprised, she could tell Grimmjow was still agitated.

”You need to calm down; trashing the hospital won’t be of any help.”

Grimmjow still doesn’t respond.

Finally, Harribel sighs and crouches down in front of him, grasping his shoulders gently and finally making eye contact with the man.

”Ichigo needs you to remain calm right now. If he’s rescued only to find out you ended up doing something that landed you in hot water, he’ll be highly upset with you.”

”Yeah yeah, he’s already a sour strawberry.”

Grimmjow grunts, looking aside.

Harribel lifts eyebrow at the comment, not really getting the joke, not that it mattered.

”Please. I know you have held yourself together for so long now, for Nelliel’s sake. Please, try to do it a bit longer. Not just for her, but him too.” Harribel tells him gently, and the blue eyes look up at her, completely void of the earlier, fiery energy they had.

”I can’t. I fuckin’....I just _can’t_ , Tia. Feels like m’ finally losing it.” He admits, as his body starts to shake from the strained effort of trying to keep tears at bay.

The woman says nothing, just slips to sit on the floor and tugs her friend into a hug, petting his hair and just waiting. Waiting for Grimmjow to pull himself back together, because she knew, that despite what he may have felt right now, the man was far too strong to give up. He would not let himself crumble completely, not until Ichigo was safe. She was not wrong, for beneath the desperation, urge to cry and curl up; his core still flickered as strong as ever, a flame that never truly went down, never burned out.

The blue orbs flicker in the dimness of the room, momentarily sharpening into something inhuman, before turning back to normal.

Grimmjow was many things, but there was one thing he ain’t.

A quitter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going sci fi everybody.  
> Seriously.   
> I did not plan this kinda climax in the story originally, but it sorta felt like the direction this had to go. This way I can kinda explain certain things even more, such as why Grimmjow was able to warm to Ichigo relatively quickly in the first place.  
> Yup.  
> It was not just the fact ichigo is a lovable sour strawberry.   
> Plus, I can kinda tie few other things together neater as well.  
> Plus.  
> Cat Grimmy is the best grimmy.


	20. Flashbacks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grimmjow starts to have flashbacks about memories he did not even know he had.  
> A connection he was not aware of.

Grimmjow was standing at the side of the conference room they were gather into.

After finally calming down and pulling himself together, they had headed into the station to plan what to do next. Isshin would have rather gone home with the girls given it was getting late, but the two refused to leave, so they were currently napping on a couch at the nearby restroom. Grimmjow watches the large collection of officers discuss and map out locations, some discussing with Harribel about any information she had.

They left him alone, likely thinking he was still too emotionally unstable.

Grimmjow glances towards the restroom, where Nelliel was as well, resting together with Ichigo’s sisters. After her memory of the events that transpired had begun to return, she’d began to act more and more like a child, and Grimmjow had a feeling the therapy sessions she’d taken so far might have been undone thanks to running into the bastard who tried to kill her.

Szayel....that fucking lunatic.

Grimmjow could barely contain his hatred. He’d never despised anybody this bad. Heck, not even Nnoitra, who’d apparently also been involved.

The only reason he didn’t give a fuck about that tall bastard right now was A) he was apparently dead if what Szayel's words were implying was true, and B) he was not the one who had his...suppose one could call boyfriend.

Grimmjow _hated_ that word, it sounded so fucking childish, but it was true.

Apparently his sour mood was shown from his face, as Harribel glances towards him concerned. Grimmjow huffs and stuffs his hands into his pockets, walking to the break room. He did not need Harribel start giving him a mother-hen speech right now. The man closes the door to the breakroom as he enters, and just gazes at the trio huddled up on the couch right now, likely finding comfort in each other.

Grimmjow felt bad for the two girls, honestly.

He knew all too well how it felt when a loved one was missing. The man paces closer and brushes an escaped lock of hair away from Nel’s face, making her shift lightly in her sleep without stirring. There is a cigarette vending machine at the corner, he grabs a pack from there and heads outside to have a smoke to try and settle down. Leaning against the wall, he blows some smoke out of his lungs, watching as the cloud dissolved into the air.

For a moment, Grimmjow closes his eyes and just lets his mind wander.

Most of it was nonsense, bits and pieces of memories from the past months with Kurosaki, from the time he really disliked the prudish kid, to now where he was freaking out over not knowing where he was. As time passed, his mind wandered further down the memory lane, until he hit some stuff he did not usually think about.

The harsh training matches, the blood and gore that was the result.

Lab tests, the faceless crowds that evaluated the fighters presented, and the formula used to enhance them.

Scared kids, looking behind their back, not knowing who they could trust.

Yltfordt in his puppy-like loyalty, beaten to the ground because he couldn’t care less how the boy had felt. He grimaced at the memory, and takes a drag from his cigarette to move away from that. He had told Kuro....Ichigo that he did not regret it.

Back then he didn’t, but now.... yeah, he could’ve been better.

His mind drifts again, and another face pops into his head.

Antenor, his blood on Grimmjow’s hands.

A dark grin spread to his face for a brief moment, and Grimmjow takes another drag of his cigarette to hide it. As he blows the smoke out, he could not stop but wonder; why had he done it again?

What had prompted him to kill the bastard?

The more he thought about it....the more he began to realize he had no fucking clue.

Sure, Luppi had mocked him a lot and bothered Nel, but honestly not in a level that warranted his gruesome death.

What had the bastard said again, before he’d scewered him?

Grimmjow gazes into thin air, scratching his neck absent-mindlessly as he thought back on it.

Weird.

The memory was kinda hazy now that he thought back on it; almost like he was watching through a TV with bad reception. Grimmjow could not even recall what he was thinking, only that there had been a huge urge to kill something. It was not unusual, for most of them had these urges, but...

Suddenly something sharp scratches his neck and Grimmjow flinches, pulling his hand back.

His eyes widen, as he realizes what the sharp feeling was.

The nails in his hand had.... _changed_.

They were black, and looked sharp as hell. He steps away from the wall just staring at the hand, his cigarette dropping to the ground slowly, as if time itself had slowed down.

An image flashes in his head.

Some sort of...white room, with people in it.

He was looking up at them, like he was...a kid?

There was a voice calling for him, it sounded familiar, but distant. Reflexively, Grimmjow brings his hands up to hold his head as he slumps back against the wall, eyes wide. He did not even feel the pain as the claws that had appeared on his hand scratched his scalp.

There was another flash.

More of those people, he did not remember who they were. There was this...girl though. She looked familiar. She looked tired and pale, like she’d not slept in ages. But she was smiling at him, reaching down to hold his hand. She says something, but Grimmjow cannot hear what it was.

Who the hell was that girl, and why did she look familiar?

Suddenly, a hand lands on his shoulder. Without thinking, Grimmjow slashes at the person, only missing Harribel’s face by an inch as she dodges, looking at him with widened eyes. For a moment the two just stare at each other in shock, and then Grimmjow backs away, grasping the hand he’d nearly used to skewer her face with.

”.....I was worried this would happen.”

Grimmjow looks up at her confused, and Harribel sighs, rubbing her eyes.

”Every day, I feared it would come out given how stressed you were about Nel. But now....I suppose this is the worst it has ever been.”

”The hell do you mean, Tia? What the fuck is going on?!” Grimmjow demands from her, still holding the clawed limb as he glares at her.

”I...don’t know exactly how to explain it. I don’t know exactly what it is either, but I’ve seen this before.” She states calmly, gently taking Grimmjow’s hand to her own, tapping at the claws.

”That day when you killed Antenor. You had these as well. When I asked Nel what it was, she said you’d grow these when you got extremely upset. She could not remember why though.” Harribel looks up at him with a frown.

”After that incident, they took you and her to the ’correction’ room, and you both seemingly...forgot what exactly had happened. You could not remember these claws at all…and I have not seen them since, either.”

Grimmjow just stares at her baffled, then looks down at his hand.

”They must have erased bits of your memory regarding to those.”

Another image flashes in his mind, and Grimmjow backs away against the wall again, sliding down to sit on the cold ground, grasping his head with widened eyes. Harribel just watches him struggle; having nothing she could do to help him with this. Whatever was happening to him right now, it was beyond her control.

”Tia?” Nelliel walks there too now, having come to look for her, and once she sees her brother curled up to the ground, clutching his head, her eyes widen in worry.

”W-what happened?”

”It seems....something has triggered lost memories for him.” Tia states calmly, making Nel look at her confused.

 

 

 

 

 

_The boy sat on his crib, watching the big adults hustle around._

_He did not understand what was happening._

_At times, one of them would come near him and poke him with those pointy looking things._

_He did not really feel anything when they did, but did not like them either._

_Other times they’d shine a light in his eyes, which also didn’t feel very nice._

_The boy makes a sound of complaint as another adult comes near him._

_The man turns to look at the brown haired one, telling him that the boy was being fussy again._

_The child did not know what that meant._

_It was all just weird mumbling in his ears._

_The boy grew fast, but he still did not quite understand words, at least not the long, weird ones the adults around him used._

_He made a sound because he didn’t like the light._

_”And that is a problem?” The brown haired man asks calmly, and the shorter male stutters ’no’ before bringing the light back at the child. He brings his hands up to shield his eyes. He didn’t like the light. Then, the man tries to forcefully push his arms aside to keep shining the light._

_The boy doesn’t like it._

_So he moves his hand to swing the man, hoping he’d go away._

_Something red gushed out from his neck and the adult stumbles to the floor, holding it. The boy stares at the weird color on his hand curiously, while everything else around him stops._

_”He’s getting aggressive!” A voice said, and suddenly one of the adults grabs him hardly, making the boy cry and reflexively swing at them, spreading more red as he’s dropped to the floor. It hurt, it did not feel nice, and so he cries louder._

_It was scary. ...._

_He starts to feel sleepy._

 

 

 

”Grimmjow?” Nelliel attempts to shake him awake from the weird state, but Grimmjow just keeps staring into thin air, lost in the flood gate of memories. He could distantly hear Nel tell Harribel to get some help as he was seemingly having a seizure of some sort.

 

 

 

_The boy was alone in the room, sitting inside his crib with bunch of toys._

_He’d been bad again._

_He did not mean to hurt the doctor._

_He just did not like the light shining into his eyes._

_It did not feel nice._

_The door opens, and a figure steps in._

_The boy looks up, expecting to see one of the scary adults. It was a.... girl._

_She looked kind of like she had a flame on top of her head, or a fluffy orange fox like one of his plushies._

_The girl looks around, adjusting to the dimmer lighting on the room, then spots the boy huddled up at the corner._

_She smiles, walking towards him slowly, and sits down beside his crib._

_”Hey. You must be the little boy they told me about.”_

_She...was different. She was not scary at all, like the rest of them. She did not use weird, big words he didn’t understand, or yell._

_The boy uncurls himself lightly, blue eyes looking up at her in the dim lighting._

_”I’ve heard you’ve been bad. I think you’re just scared.”_

_The boy nods slightly, and she gives him a sad smile._

_”I know. I’m scared too. But maybe we can be scared together?”_

_She hesitates for a moment, and then offers her hand for the tiny toddler. After a moment, the small boy shifts and grasps the hand, letting the girl pull him out of the crib and into her lap and start humming a song._

_It was nice._

 

"He just...he fell to the ground and began to mumble under his breath like that."

Nelliel sniffs, looking at her brother who was still in his trance like state, currently lying on the couch, staring up into thin air like his mind had drifted elsewhere. Urahara examines the man, flicking a light in his eyes but getting no response. The strange claws on Grimmjow's hands appear again however as he does so, and the man backs away upon noticing it.

"It seems to be a flashback." Tia comments, appearing far calmer than what she felt.

 

_The boy was sitting on her lap, while she was reading a story for him._

_She had wrapped the boy into a blanket that she’d written his name on with some sort of pen. Ever since she’d come there, the adults had been happy with him. He no longer cut anyone, preferring to just go to her if he was upset._

_He’d learned to talk properly too over the past months, thanks to her. The boy even allowed her to shine the light on his eyes, or poke him with the pointy things if she needed. Each time, the girl apologized, not really wanting to do it clearly._

_”Hey, what would you want to be once you grow up?”_

_She asks after finishing the story._

_The boy thinks for a moment, holding his chin thoughtfully and making the girl smile at the cute sight._

_”Big and scary.”_

_The girl lifts eyebrow with a giggle, asking why such a thing._

_”Because everybody here is like that. I wanna be that too so I don’t have to be scared.”_

_”Oh, sweetie...” the girl sighs almost sad now, brushing through the blue hair on top of his head._

_He thought the color was weird, nobody else had it, but the girl always said it was beautiful._

_”You’re not supposed to be scared.” She says quietly after a moment, and the boy looks up at her confused._

_”A child should not be scared of those who take care of him or her.”_

_”I am not scared of you.”_

_The girl smiles, pecking his forehead. ”I am glad to hear that sweetie.”_

_The boy smiles at her and cuddles closer into her lap._

_”What do you want to be when you grow up?”_

_The boy asks after a moment, and the girl hums, holding her chin, mimicking the pose the boy had done earlier._

_”I guess I’d like to help people. Cure diseases or so.”_

_She pauses, and then looks down at him with a smile._

_”Maybe I could be a mum too. Have kids to fuzz over, and get mother’s day cards and gifts every year!”_

_The boy tilts his head, confused._

_”What is a mum?”_

_The warm brown eyes gaze at him for a moment, and she looked sad._

_The boy did not like seeing her sad._

_”A mum is someone who takes care of little children like you.”_

_”So, they’re scary?”_

_The girl shakes her head, still looking sad._

_”No. Mums are not supposed to be scary. They’re supposed to be nice.”_

_”Like you?”_

_The girl’s face melts into a warm smile. ”If you think I am nice, then yes, like me.”_

_The boy hums contemplating on all that._

 

 

 

 

_The girl comes into his room; today she looked a little distraught._

_She smiles regardless as she sees the boy. He’d grown up a lot in the past six months, already reaching her waist. The girl had commented he grew really fast, but the boy did not really understand what that meant._

_He’d never seen other kids in there. Regardless of his height, the girl takes him into her lap as usual, combing through the messy blue hair._

_He looks up at her worried._

_”Why are you sad?”_

_The girl sighs and rubs her eyes, shaking her head._

_”I...there are things that have been happening. Things that have made me contemplate on if I should stay.”_

_The boy instantly looks at her worried._

_”I don’t want you to leave.”_

_”Oh sweetheart, I don’t want to leave you either. I just don’t know....”_

_She pauses and looks around, as if to check nobody was listening to them._

_”I don’t know how I could get you out of here by myself.”_

_The boy tilts his head confused._

_”Why would you want me to leave too? They say I’m too dangerous to be let outside...”_

_The girl shakes her head firmly, petting his hair with a gentle smile._

_”No, that is not true. You have abilities that can be dangerous, but ability is not evil by itself. It depends on how you use it, and on the core, you are a good child. You just need….proper guidance I think. Something like that.” She said it with an absolute conviction in her eyes, and a moment later pulls the little boy into a tight hug._

_”I’ll get us out of here somehow. Just you wait.”_

_The boy says nothing, just hugs her back. For a moment, they both just sit there in silence._

_”You know what I’ll do once we get out of here?” She suddenly asks, and the boy looks up at her curious._

_”I’ll buy you ice cream.” She says with a smirk._

_”What is that?”_

_”It’s a sweet food, you’ll love it, all kids do.”_

_”I’m not a normal kid.”_

_The girl ruffles his hair and pecks his cheek._

_”Still a child, even if you weren’t born like the most of us.”_

 

 

 

 

 

 

_The boy looks up as someone steps into his room._

_His joy fades quickly._

_It was not the girl, it was the tall, brown haired man._

_He was always so calm, but he was scariest out of all of them to him._

_”I’ve come to inform you of sad news, son.”_

_The boy did not know why the man referred to him like that._

_He was nobody’s son, the doctors made it very clear._

_”Masaki has...passed away.”_

_The blue eyes widen, and a second later, he starts crying._

_”N-no! She can’t be dead! She said she’d bring me outside to get ice cream!”_

_The man watches the boy sniffle for a moment, before walking to him and sitting down to the edge of the bed, making the boy tense and turn quiet. He looks at the man with big eyes, and tenses even further as he reaches out to pat his head gently._

_”I understand your sadness, but you need to be strong now, Grimmjow. She would not want you to cry like this. Especially not when somebody else needs you right now.”_

_”H-huh?”_

_The man turns towards the door, and the boy realizes that a girl stood there, clutching a large caterpillar plushy and looking up at him with wide hazel eyes while sucking her thumb._

_”This is Nelliel. She is your sister. We were supposed to unite you two earlier, but she was...sick.”_

_The boy just gazes at her._

_She looked nothing like him, apart from the weird hair color._

_Even then, hers was green._

_”I don’t want a little sister! I want her back!”_

_The boy demands, and the man sighs, making him turn quiet again._

_”I understand that longing, but I cannot perform such a miracle. Please, be nice to your sister, she’s wanted to meet you for a long time now.”_

_The girl walks closer, examining the boy curiously._

_”No!”_

_He jumps off the bed and runs off; hiding into the dark room he was normally put in when misbehaving._

_The boy sits there, huddled in the corner for what felt like hours._

_Suddenly, somebody appears behind him, and he turns, finding the green haired girl looking at him with big brown eyes._

_They were the wrong kind of brown, he did not like it._

_”Go away! I don’t want a sister!”_

_He spats at the girl, who just looks at him, still sucking her thumb._

_The boy turns his back to her again, curling up and staring intently at the wall._

_After a moment, he felt the girl sit down behind him, leaning against his back._

_He refuses to acknowledge her._

 

 

 

 

 

 

_There was a loud noise outside._

_The boy peeks out from the room, finding the little girl crying loudly in the middle of the room._

_There was another one of the adults on the floor, bleeding from his head. Given the red smears on her hand, she’d likely hit him. Perhaps the man had spooked her._

_Grimmjow knew how that felt like._

_Another adult attempts to grab her, but she sprints away, smacking him accidentally in the jaw._

_Then, the hazel eyes spot her, and she sprints towards him, hiding behind the boy who just looks at her baffled. All of the adults tense, and the older male doctor who’d gotten scored in the jaw walks closer to them cautiously, holding his hands up._

_”Grimmjow, please give your sister to us. She’s been misbehaving.”_

_The boy looks at the girl, who clutched his arm with widened eyes, shaking her head frantic._

_She was scared of what they’d do to her._

_The boy turns his gaze back at the man, who had sneaked closer why he wasn’t looking, but stops instantly as the catlike eyes land on him again._

_Slowly, Grimmjow pulls out the claws on his hands, and hisses at the man._

_”No.”_

_”Boy, this has nothing to do with you, just give her to us.”_

_The man tells him firmly, but there was fear in his eyes now._

_Fear?_

_He was supposed to be afraid of them._

_But as the boy examined the man’s face, his stretched out smile and slight trembling hands, it was suddenly clear._

_The man was afraid of him._

_He had never noticed it before._

_They had always been afraid of him, but the boy had not seen it, not until now._

_The boy felt his face twist into a smile he’d likely find scary if he saw it._

_”Make me.”_

_The man huffs irritated, and attempts to reach him._

_The boy instantly slashes his hand up, cutting deep gashes on the man’s arm, and he backs away with a pained howl, holding his bleeding limb._

_Grimmjow looks around; they all were afraid now._

_As two of them attempt to come closer, he hisses at them, and the two back away instantly._

_They were afraid._

_The boy liked it._

_He’d been afraid of them for so long... _

_”You have finally grown.” He tenses, as the tall, brown haired man walks towards him, clapping._

_He was not afraid, of course he would not be. The boy straightens himself, standing firmly between him and the scared girl._

_”You may watch after your sister from now on. I believe they mishandled her.”_

_The man tells the boy, who looks back at her._

_She gazed back with her hazel eyes._

_She was also scared, but not him._

_The boy looks back up at the man, who reaches for him fearlessly, patting his head as he crouches down to be on eye level with the child._

_”You will become so much stronger now, Grimmjow. Just remember, you don’t have to fear anything.”_

_The boy knew it was not the truth._

_What the man meant, was that he did not have to fear anything._

_But him._

 

 

 

 

 

When Grimmjow finally snapped out of it, he was resting on the couch his sister and the Kurosaki siblings had slept before.

It was like half the conference room was now in there, looking at him with concerned eyes. It was weird. Grimmjow pushes himself up, holding his head. More of those images kept appearing into his mind, but he could not quite make sense to them yet.

”Grimmjow-san?” He looks up at Urahara, who was examining him with a frown on his face. His gaze drops down to Grimmjow’s hands, and as the man brings them up, he notes both of them had the claws on now.

It explained why a lot of the folk in the room looked slightly freaked out.

Grimmjow closes his eyes with a frown.

He’d been able to do this in his memory as a kid, so...

Moments later, there was weird tingling in his hands, and as he opens his eyes, the claws shrink and turn into normal human nails.

”That was quite the magic trick.” The busty female cop points out, her eyebrows nearly shot up to her hairline.

Grimmjow says nothing, just stares at his hands for a moment. Then, he lifts his gaze to look at Nel briefly, whose eyes were wide and blurry with tears. She moves as if to come and hug him, but Grimmjow suddenly turns his attention to Isshin, pointing at him.

”You. I need ta talk to you.”

The man lifts eyebrow, but then nods, and requests everybody else to vacate the room. After a moment of hesitation, they do, with Nel and Ichigo’s sisters glancing at the two men concerned before the door closes.

”What happened?” Isshin asks, crossing his arms.

”Flashback. I saw some shit I’d forgotten a while back.”

Grimmjow rubs his eyes, before looking up at Isshin again with a deep frown.

”Yer wife. Her name was Masaki, right?” The man just nods, waiting for what was his point.

”....She was there. She was the girl who took care of me during the first years of my existence.”

Isshin doesn’t look surprised by this revelation, and he sighs, sitting down on the chair opposite from the couch.

”....So you are the boy she mentioned when we rescued her.”

Grimmjow glares at him wordlessly, clearly expecting for answers.

”She was badly injured, but she was muttering about a blue haired boy she was going to take out for an ice cream. Once she recovered from her injuries however, Masaki-Chan had forgotten most of what had happened to her.”

Grimmjow looks at him with widened eyes.

Isshin releases another sigh, looking at him apologetically. ”She never really regained any of it. But...when Ichigo was born, she began to cry. Masaki did not even know why she was sad. Back then I figured it had something to do with the mystery boy she mentioned, and later on, when I saw you with Ichigo....”

Isshin shakes his head with a melancholic smile.

”I knew you were the sky haired boy she kept talking about while she was still under the influence of her medication in the hospital. I did not say anything, given how you did not seem to recognize her from the picture we had of her on the wall back then.”

Grimmjow turns his gaze away, contemplating on what Isshin told him.

That would explain why she never came back, despite her promise. His memories were still a hazed mess, but he was certain that when she’d said she’d get him out of there....she’d meant it.

”I’m sorry. We let you down long before you even knew it.” The old man meant it sincerely, but Grimmjow shakes his head, lifting his hand up and summoning his claws again, repeating the process a few times as if in trance.

”If you had, Nel would’ve been stuck in that hell by herself.”

”I suppose that is true.” The old man comments after a moment of silence, seemingly not bothered by him doing the weird loop thing with his unexpected weaponry.

”.....What the hell am I?”

He finally asks, but doesn’t look at Isshin, figuring the man did not have the answer anyway.

”Whatever you used to be; right now you are the man who loves my son, and that is all that matters.”

Grimmjow almost wanted to groan; so THAT’S where the sappiness came from?

Still though...having Ichigo’s dad state it indicated he accepted their relationship.

”That ain’t enough ta explain why the fuck I have murder claws in my hands.” The man snorts and pushes himself up, struggling to find his balance for a bit.

”I believe that is something only Aizen knows at the moment. Although Urahara did indicate your genetics are different from all the other modified youngsters he’s tested.”

Grimmjow just hums, rubbing his eyes.

”Your sister will likely want to know what happened. She was really distraught.”

Grimmjow grunts, informing the man he was not up for a conversation with her right now. The man nods and gets up.

”I’ll tell them to let you process what just happened. We are still trying to figure out where Ichigo is.”

”Yer awfully calm given its yer son in trouble we are dealing with.”

”Fretting and freaking out will not help solve anything.” Isshin admits with a sigh, brushing through his short hair.

”Believe me, we are all on the edge, it’s just that we need to focus to bring him... home.” Isshin’s voice trembled lightly finally, but he held it together and nodded at Grimmjow heading out of the room and leaving him to his thoughts.

As Grimmjow kept pacing around the room, more disoriented images popped in his head; it felt like somebody had opened a flood gate and there was no stopping it now. The more memories returned, the more confused he was.

One thing was for sure though; whatever he was, he was not a human.

Not fully anyway, and only Aizen had answers to his questions.

Aizen...or Szayel.

Grimmjow looks up, as an idea starts forming in his head.

What reason did they have to take Ichigo alive?

Unless they wanted to test his superhuman physique, wasn’t that what he’d thought about it earlier?

The best equipment for that.... Could Szayel have brought Ichigo there?

It....actually made sense.

That laboratory was never found, the fact he and Nel had made it all the way into their late teens before the police got involved was a sign of that. They had not found it even after the orphanage burned down. Not that Nel or him would’ve been able to help, for he did not even remember the damn place until right now, and she likely still didn’t.

Szayel would not use a place that likely was under the cops’ radar.

Grimmjow glances towards the door, hearing quiet discussion at the other side. He looks at the emergency exit door he’d gone out from earlier, and considers his options. No. He had to go by himself; the police would take too long. Plus, he would not get the answers he wanted if he let those slow fools do this by themselves. Grimmjow makes his decision, and grabs a pen and a paper from the notepad on the desk, scribbling a message on it, before grabbing his jacket and tugging the hood over his head.

He sprints out of the door, following his memory to where it led him.

Where it all began.

A figure watches him head out into the nightly streets, silver hair hidden under a hood.

 

 

 

Moments later, Harribel arrives in the room to ask if he would like to talk with them now, but she is greeted by an empty room, with a note left behind for them.

_”Szayel likely took Ichigo to where we came from, Nel.”_

Harribel lifts her gaze just as Nel steps in the room, and the green haired woman had never seen her partner look this concerned.

Once she sees the note, the woman understands why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flashback time yo.  
> Baby/Toddler Grimm is the cutest thing ever.   
> Even cuter than pouty sour strawberry Ichigo.  
> Also, not gonna lie, I kinda cried a little when I wrote those flashbacks.  
> I showed it to my friend (who doesn't know much about Bleach) and even she weeped.  
> Poor baby Grimm.  
> But hey, in the end he DID become what he wanted to be.  
> Big and Scary


	21. Unleashed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grimmjow learns the truth, and he and Ichigo are thrown into a desperate situation.  
>  Tesla's prediction comes true, and Szayel is in quite a pinch.   
> Also, a Luppi cameo

The area was a wasteland.

The ground where the orphanage had been before burning down was covered in grass, and only few bits of old tile walls still stood. Grimmjow paces around the area, looking around in the darkness.

On the way, another weird thing had happened; his vision had brightened remarkably all of a sudden, as if he’d out on night-goggles or something. Despite it being a pitch black night right now, he saw almost as well as during the day.

He vaguely recalls a memory of the girl - Masaki, Ichigo's mum - commenting on his cat-like eyes.

So they weren’t just for a visual effect huh?

Grimmjow stops and closes his eyes, trying to look through this new set of memories.

He knew the lab door was here somewhere; the mansion was originally owned by Aizen privately, and the lab had been made long before he put up the orphanage facade.

Mapping out the old layout that was now gone, Grimmjow tries to remember from where exactly he’d come out from, when Aizen had decided to let him and Nel to join the rest of the kids. This was where his memories had been somehow cut off, Grimmjow could tell now. The next memory was of him and Nel at the place’s doorstep, the earliest memory he originally had.

Aizen or one of his goons had somehow wiped the rest out of his and Nelliel’s mind.

Grimmjow paces towards the forest edge.

The trees were much bigger now, than they had been back then. He steps into the forest, walking for a few meters, until he spots something on the ground. Wiping the soil and moss over it, there was clearly a hidden door. Normally it would likely be completely covered with soil and grass and such, but it was clear to him it had been used recently; hence he was able to spot it easily.

Grimmjow stands up, his mouth going a little dry, and he swallows down uneasily.

This was it.

If he’d go down there...regardless of whenever Ichigo was there or not, if Szayel was, he’d likely learn things about himself he did not necessarily like. There was already a lot he didn’t, but perhaps he’d now find out a reason why he had those shitty traits.

The man looks around, then after a moment of hesitation, removes his jacket and hangs it onto a branch, so if anybody followed him, they’d find the door.

He had a feeling it would take them a moment to realize he meant the orphanage, or its remains.

Sucking in a deep breath, Grimmjow yanks the door open. There was no sound aside from the clang and a heavy thud as he drops it to the ground. The staircase down was dark, as there were no lights on in the bottom apparently.

If Szayel was there, he likely knew Grimmjow was coming. He had always been a dramatic shithead, but not stupid. However....he also loved the sound of his own voice, and he was weaker than Grimmjow.

Still, this was a reckless idea.

The blunet glances around once more, and then starts descending the stairway.

 

 

The place was almost exactly like what he saw in those memories.

A long corridor led to a round, open space, with an upper deck running around the walls, glass windows on every side.

Observation deck or so.

There was a large door at the other end, the one he knew led to the main lab and other facilities, including the rooms they’d kept him when he was a tiny brat. He walks in the middle of the room. It almost looked like the arena he’d been forced to fight against other enhanced kids and teens, even adults. Grimmjow could not remember it ever being used though, at least not when he was there.

Knowing now, that he was...not necessarily a full on human put a new twist to those fights.

Perhaps they were not meant to show off the serum to the viewers, but merely test _his_ abilities.

Suddenly, a light appears above him, making the man hiss as he is blinded momentarily, before his eyes adjust again to the new level of light in the room. Grimmjow could feel eyes on him, and he looks up to the observation deck, keeping his face stoic.

”Jeagerjaquez. You survived! Then again I was aware of that for my associate informed me you were coming.”

An immense wave of rage washed over him as he saw Szayel’s dumbass face, but Grimmjow kept himself calm, he needed to have a word with this bastard.

”Ya chose the wrong vial.”

”I did? Oh well.”

The man shrugs and pushes a button on a control panel in front of him, shutting down the door behind Grimmjow to ensure he would not escape.

”Did you come here to pick up your sweet little strawberry?”

He wanted to strangle the bastard for daring to use that nickname, but kept himself calm. The bastard was already talking too much for his own good, and knowing that Ichigo was somewhere in there was a relief.

Then again, the fact the pink haired asshole was currently staring down at him smugly was enough of a clue that Kurosaki was likely in here.

”Or....given the fact you have not attacked me yet....” Szayel adjusts his glasses, clearly amused by something.

”You want to know why this place is familiar to you.”

Grimmjow says nothing, just paces around slightly, examining the area with his eyes. Even though the area was dimly lit aside from the spot Szayel was in, his eyes brightened everything so that he could see clear as day. It was kinda freaky, but admittedly helpful skill to have.

”It must be rather confusing, adjusting to that nifty little quirk your eyes can do.”

”Are you gonna keep talking shit or actually have something meaningful to say?”

Szayel snorts at that comment, clearly not approving of his dismissive attitude.

”Aizen-Sama should DEFINITELY have made you less of a crude vermin. Not that I don’t approve of his genius, but in my eyes you would be considered a failure of a project.”

Grimmjow stops, then suddenly moves and jumps, actually managing to leap high enough to land on the pathway. It surprises them both briefly, though for different reasons. Szayel quickly recollects himself and pulls out a gun.

”I recommend not coming closer.”

Grimmjow just leans lazily against the railing, giving him a sideways glance with an amused, relaxed smile. It was a facade, but given Szayel’s reaction, near perfect act. Before irritation and stress became his default emotions, Grimmjow was known to have this very smirk on his face constantly, so people bought it easily as real.

”Ain’t gonna. Don’t wanna get your slimy sleaze ball juices all over me.” That comment clearly irritated Szayel, but he held his composure, knowing full well how unpredictable this man was.

”So? What’s with this place?” Grimmjow asks with a casual tone, looking around like he was not trapped inside an enemy territory.

His seeming arrogance was off-putting to his companion, which was Grimmjow’s intention. Szayel was the type to try and pull people down a peg if he thought they were acting too arrogant. Or, to put it simply, he did not like if someone thought they were better than him, so Szayel would do anything in his power to disturb the individual. It was just that in this case, the ammo he had was what Grimmjow wanted to know.

”Oh, you do not remember still, do you, Grimmjow-kun?” Szayel’s tone was mocking now, and he lowers the weapon back to his belt, though keeps a hand on it just in case, while typing away on his console.

”I thought you found your way here because your memories began to return, according to my associate. I suppose I overestimated you, which is not surprising.”

Who the hell was this associate Szayel kept mentioning?

So somebody else was in here as well, someone who’d been observing him for a while now. It was an unpleasant thought, but Grimmjow shoves it down for now, not having time to ponder this detail. Grimmjow flashes a bit of irritation in his eyes, just enough for the man to catch on and turn smug as hell.

Szayel taps his jaw briefly, before smirking at him again.

”Then again, Aizen-sama did do thorough job in cleaning your memory about anything unnecessary.”

”Cut the science talk will ya? Nobody gives a fuck about that.”

Szayel glares at him irritated, not liking the fact he was interrupted. As Grimmjow had predicted, the man continues his speech even more eagerly after that.

”Oh it is easy of you to act so confident right now. It must make you feel special, knowing about the few tricks you can do. Knowing they exist and how to use them efficiently are two different things, you brutish fool!”

Grimmjow brings his hand up and brings the claws out swiftly, tilting his head towards Szayel with a slight, sinister smirk.

”Dunno. I seem to know what I’m doing pretty well.”

Szayel’s hand ghosts over his weapon now, but he keeps himself calm.

”I recommend putting those away; unless you want your sweet little strawberry lose his head.”

Grimmjow huffs out a snort, but pulls them back regardless and stuffs his hands into his pockets again.

”He ain’t sweet, I can guarantee that.”

”Yes he did seem rather difficult to handle.”

The man was unable to hide the slight flare in his eyes, as he turns to face Szayel fully, angry stealth creeping into his voice.

”What did you do to him?”

Szayel smirks, pleased to know he finally hit a sore spot; the arrogant attitude was getting annoying. The man adjusts his glasses, and then opens a door behind him, gesturing towards it.

”Why don’t you join me on a tour, to refresh your memory?”

”Why the fuck would I do that?”

Szayel shakes his head with a dramatic sigh, crossing his arms.

”Please, do not try to pretend you came here just for Kurosaki. If you had, you’d killed me already. You want answers, answers you know I have.”

Grimmjow says nothing, just stares at him with a stoic look.

”Why would you wanna tell me anything?”

Szayel snorts, and gives him a condescending look as he crosses his arms.

”I like informing the ignorant.”

Grimmjow had a feeling there was more to this than that. The fact Szayel had come to greet him alone was suspicious, given how seemingly dumb it was; the man had to be aware how easily Grimmjow could snap his neck or slice it, before he could even pull out his gun. Yet, he was seemingly not concerned. This had to be a trap. The problem was, Grimmjow had to spring it, as otherwise he likely would not find Ichigo, not alive at least.

Szayel had to have some sorta back up plan in case he did not cooperate at first.

The man turns his gaze aside for a moment, and then looks at the mad scientist, inclining his head in an impression of a nod.

”Fine. I’ll let you have your shitty tour guide show.”

Szayel gives him a displeased glare, but gestures towards the door regardless.

”After you.”

”Like hell I’m gonna do that when you have a gun.”

The pinky looks at him miffed, but then disarms the weapon and leaves it to the console, looking at him pointedly.

For a moment the two just stare at each other, clearly trying to deduce what the other one was going to do.

Grimmjow noted that his enhanced eyes did not just brighten the dim surroundings; in general his gaze was sharper than normal, and he picked up on even the tiniest of changes in Szayel’s expression and body language. It was not just his eyes though; Grimmjow realized his other senses were also heightened beyond what he was used to right now, and given his were ALREADY beyond human level, it was ridiculous.

He could hear Szayel’s fastened heartbeat, despite him standing several feet away.

He could literally smell the cold sweat running down the man’s face, a sign of unease.

Fear.

He’d known the pinky bastard was afraid of him, but right now that fact was even more prominent in his mind, wanting to twist his lips into a creepy ass, wicked grin that disturbed even Grimmjow himself. He was kinda crazy, but rarely attempted to appear like some loopy serial killer.

......Okay, he pulled the look off really well, but it did not mean he wanted to.

Grimmjow shakes his head to clear his thoughts, and then walks past Szayel, entering through the door with hands in his pockets. After a second, the man hurries after him, closing the door behind them. Getting out of here could prove difficult, but right now Grimmjow did not care. He had to find Ichigo. He wanted to know, just what the hell was happening to him, and why.

”I must say, you two fit together well; reckless, naive fools who do not see the bigger picture.”

Szayel comments once they reach the door at the other end, and arrive to what looked like a laboratory crossed with a dentist’s office, given the chair in the middle.

Grimmjow now notes that Szayel indeed was not alone, although he doubted the duo he saw was the associate Szayel talked about. They were large, weird looking identical men that appeared like two giant babies given their pudgy features. Knowing Szayel, he’d likely experimented on the two sometime, giving them their weird appearance.

”Did you dispose of that vermin?” Szayel demands from the two, who nod in unison, saluting him.

”Good, Tesla was starting to get on my nerves. It is better he is dead.”

Tesla? Grimmjow digs through his memory.

Right... ”Wasn’t he like Nnoitra’s lapdog?”

”He was, until Aizen-sama asked me to dispose of Nnoitra, and he came under my command. The little pig was not too happy about it.” Szayel stated all this so casually, that it would have creeped most others out. Not Grimmjow, for he knew exactly what kinda shithead this crazy bastard was.

He’d been a sick fuck already as a kid, torturing little animals for his experiments.

Szayel walks to the computer, and brings something up on screen.

It was a picture of him, taken sometime during one of his matches. He looked absolutely feral there, though it was nothing new. Grimmjow was aware just how terrifying he could be when under the Trance influence.

”Did you not ever wonder, why you weren’t sold off like a lot of other, strong test subjects?”

”Heard I was too fuckin’ violent even for those shitheads.” Grimmjow states truthfully with a shrug, gaining an eye roll and a huff from Szayel.

”Oh no no no _no_. There was plenty of interest for some reason. You see though; selling off these youngling metahumans was just a side-business.”

Few more photos, all of them were depicting Grimmjow during his matches. All told the same story pretty much; he wan, and looked absolutely insane when doing it.

”In truth, what Aizen was testing, was _you_.”

Grimmjow lifts a bored eyebrow at Szayel, although on the inside he was a little taken aback. While he'd had an off-handed thought of this being the case earlier, Grimmjow had not thought it could actually be the case; he'd never really felt like he was being treated differently from the rest.

Then again, nothing he thought he’d known of his childhood applied anymore. It was pretty clear there had been a lot of shit going on behind the scenes he’d not been aware of.

”Aizen-sama was attempting to create some sort of perfect soldier, and as you know, the kids in that orphanage were his test subjects.”

”Tell me somethin’ I _don’t know,_ fuckin’ asshat.”

The pink haired man rolls his eyes at Grimmjow’s weak jab, turning his attention back to the screen.

”The truth is...majority of the rest were merely tools for him to test and better his actual creation, which was you. _The Pantera_ , as your codename was.”

Grimmjow was a little surprised by that.

....Sure, he’d always wondered how he’d come up with the name for his cat, it had been kind of a weird thing to call a white cat as. Panthers were usually yellow or black and had spots on them.

”All of those kids, merely subjects to test if your enhancements could be directly translated to them. If they couldn’t, they were used as food for you to devour so to say.”

Grimmjow looks up at the screen now, unable to hide the way his expression changed. His eyes widened with slight unease, and his entire body tenses lightly.

”Now, I was not used for this measly purpose, as Aizen-sama noticed my intelligence almost instantly and came to the conclusion I am much more useful as a research partner than fodder for a beast to feed on.”

”Ya don’t mean assistant? I doubt Aizen really sees you as equal.” Grimmjow points out without looking at him, and sure enough, the smirk on Szayel’s face fades a bit, replaced by an annoyed frown.

”I would have made you mute had I been in Aizen-samas shoes, but alas, not even his creations are perfect.”

Grimmjow just snorts at that.

His face was stoic, but on the inside, the man began to feel extremely uneasy. The stuff the pinky was telling him... it was sick beyond words, especially given the fact he knew what he was capable of, even more so now, that he’d sort of re-learned what he’d forgotten.

Szayel seems to pick up on this despite his best efforts, as a sinister grin spreads on his face, and he brings up a medical file, that had all sorts of notes on Grimmjow.

Basic stuff like height and weight at the time it was written, but it also had descriptions of his abilities.

Yeah, Grimmjow knew how bad he was, but reading that list like this...his fists clenched involuntarily in his pockets.

”That day when you killed Antenor....”

”What about that?” Grimmjow snaps at him, turning to glare at Szayel, who just kept on smirking.

His two minions kept their eyes on the visitor, ready to act in case he’d charge at their boss.

”It was a test. Aizen-Sama wanted to see just how powerful you had grown. He wanted to see if you really could rip people apart with your bare hands.”

Szayel’s smile was positively sadistic and gleeful right now, and Grimmjow just stares at him as the man taps on the computer again, bringing out an old video. It was dimly lit, security camera footage of sorts, and it showcased a familiar black haired youth, taunting somebody off screen.

Grimmjow knew already what was gonna happen, but he couldn’t stop watching.

A moment later, another figure walks to the frame.

He was younger, his hair lightly shorter and he still had not gained all the muscle he now had, but Grimmjow could easily recognize his lazy swagger, the habit of walking with his hands in his pockets.

The black haired teen keeps talking, holding his finger up in almost a scolding manner, smug smile on his face.

Looking at that moment from this angle....Grimmjow realized something was off.

His expression was strange.

It did not show the mild irritation he usually felt about Luppi, nor the hint of bloodlust as he’d often wanted to rip the bastard’s head off.

His blue eyes were unusually blank, like he was not truly listening to what Luppi was saying.

Then, a moment later, as a few other figures appear at the edges of the frame, he moves.

Blood gushes out from Luppi’s back, and Grimmjow watches with a mixture of fascination and slight horror, as his past-self skewers the young man, before yanking the arm off from within his body, and grabbing his head with the bloodied hand, slamming it against the floor so hard it cracked.

Afterwards the younger Grimmjow licks the blood off his hands with a positively terrifying grin on his face, before he starts _laughing._

The people at the edges of the frame seem panicked and run away from the scene, all except a young blond girl, whom he recognized to be Harribel.

She also looked terrified, but unlike the rest, did not panic.

A second later, group of adults appear and apprehend the cackling teen, dragging him away from the scene.

 

 

 

”Nostalgic, isn’t it?”

Grimmjow just brings out his hand and stares at it, as if he could still feel Luppi’s blood covering it.

He...could not really remember all what he just saw.

All he recalled, even now, was the vague knowledge he’d done it.

”Aizen-Sama was fairly happy about the results I reported to him.” Grimmjow’s gaze snaps back up at him.

”Ya were in it already? You were like, fourteen.”

”Genius does not look at the age.”

”How...how the fuck did he make me do that?” Grimmjow asks begrudgingly, knowing he could not pretend to be uncaring for much longer, even Szayel would not buy it.

The man smirks, combing through his ridiculous hairdo. Sure, Grimmjow’s hair was weird as hell too, but at least he did not mess with it several hours a day like Szayel seemed to be doing, given how ridiculously neat it looked.

”Aizen-sama had this specific device he used, a frequency that only you could hear and react to. Sort of like a trained dog responding to the owner’s whistle.” Szayel really seemed to love using metaphors that described Grimmow as less than human.

It started to get on his nerves, but the man knew getting hostile right now could be a bad idea; while the two minions did not seem to be the brightest in the bunch, they likely were somewhat strong, and there was also the issue of Szayel still having Ichigo somewhere he could use as blackmail.

”Granted, the way you lashed out afterwards, it was not planned, hence Aizen-Sama decided not to use the ’dog-whistle’ for you anymore. Having you ever attack him because of your frenzy would not be acceptable.”

Grimmjow snorts at that cracking his neck and rubbing it.

”I’m pretty sure when I do go to a frenzy state, I don’t care who I’m attacking, regardless of how t’was triggered.”

”Yes, that was indeed a problem. Your violent fits.” Szayel presses few more keys in the computer, and a picture of Nel appears on screen.

”That is the sole reason Nelliel-Chan was created. She worked as your stabilizer.”

Grimmjow blinks, staring at the crazy scientist confused.

Szayel sighs dramatically and rubs his eyes like the theatrical bastard he was.

”Why do you think she is able to make you calm down better than anybody else? Why you cannot stay mad at her, nor even bring yourself to get violent towards her, no matter what?”

Szayel adjusts his glasses, as he turns to face Grimmjow fully, a slight amused smile dancing on his lips.

”That was her job, her _purpose_. She was specifically designed so that the pheromones her body releases naturally soothe you and lower your adrenaline levels.”

”If that’s true, why the fuck did Aizen make her strong as well?”

”Precaution, if she’s have to physically hold you down sometime.” The man chuckles, holding his chin as he examines the image of Nelliel on screen.

The sleazy smirk on his face made Grimmjow want to strangle him, but he somehow willed himself to stay put for now, just glaring at the man.

”It is quite amusing in truth; the whole reason she exists is simply to work as a sedative for a vicious beast, that would otherwise reap through an entire city if allowed.”

Grimmjow stares at the smug bastard, having quite a few choices of words to say to him right now. He holds it down however.

”If that’s true, why the fuck ya tried to kill her?”

Szayel shrugs, brushing his hair again.

”Aizen-Sama and I, we came up with a new way to tame you, so he had no need for her. Plus she was going to reveal the location of this laboratory, as well as proof about the top secret activities performed within the orphanage.”

Grimmjow frowns at that; yeah, that sounded like something Nelliel would have tried to do.

Then, the first part of Szayel’s sentence hits him.

”What do ya mean with that?”

The pinky’s eyes sharpen alongside an evil smirk, and suddenly his minions jump at Grimmjow, attempting to force him to the ground.

The fuckers were strong as hell.

But he was stronger.

With a growl, Grimmjow throws the two off of him, sending them fly against the opposing wall, before lunging at Szayel as he finally lost his cool, a clawed hand grasping his throat and cutting off the man’s air. He growls at the bastards face, again seeing bits of red in his vision.

It was not normal for it to trigger this easily, but before he could assist the situation further in his head, Szayel pulls out a syringe and manages to poke him with it.

Grimmjow shoves him aside and digs the needle out of his skin, but it was too late, for whatever was in it was already making his brain hazy.

”Relax, that was mainly just a sedative, alongside a little something within it; I want to test in practice if our new solution to your little behavioral problems works. Not that it wouldn’t, my designs are perfect.”

Szayel rubs his neck and coughs as he gathers himself off the floor. Grimmjow attempts to reach for him again, but his legs felt like led, and the man stumbles to the ground, feeling extremely dizzy.

”That will pass soon enough, and then I have some plans for you, little kitty.”

Grimmjow just growls at him, but is unable to move or keep his eyes open.

The man collapses to the floor, blacking out and cursing himself for letting his guard down.

 

 

 

 

As the orange haired male stirs, he realizes he was no longer in the room he’d been dragged into.

He was lying on the ground in the middle of some sort of high-tech arena.

As he pulls himself up, the young man holds his head, for it hurt like hell. Suddenly, Ichigo spots something lying on the ground further away from him. He instantly recognizes the blue patch of hair and his eyes widen in shock. Grimmjow looked relatively unharmed, but he was clearly unconscious. Ichigo attempts to get up, but then a sharp pain courses through his body and he freezes, holding his head as that’s where the shock seemed to originate.

_”Don’t be so hasty, Kurosaki-kun.”_

The fiery haired male looks up, and finds the crazy scientist standing behind one of the glass panels, looking down at him smugly with hands held behind his back. He seemed to be speaking through some sort of speaker as the glass was too thick to let anyone’s voice through it.

”What the hell did you do?!” Ichigo demands from him, still holding his aching head.

_”Oh, nothing special. Aizen-Sama just wishes to see which one of you is stronger.”_

Szayel doesn’t even look at Ichigo as he states those words, holding up a device Ichigo had seen the man use before. It was the same one he’d given a shock for him earlier.

”What are you...”

Szayel just smirks down at him and activated the device again.

For a moment, nothing happens, and Ichigo thinks foolishly that perhaps the madman’s plan did not work.

Then, he heard as something shifted behind him, and as Ichigo turns his head, he sees Grimmjow was scrambling up to his feet. At first he was relieved to see that, but the second the man turns, Ichigo knew something was wrong.

The normally more expressive and electric eyes were completely dull and blank, like he wasn’t there.

Ichigo stands up too cautiously, not understanding what was going on. His body was still lightly wobbly from the earlier strain put on it by Szayel’s ’tests.’

”Grimm...?” The blue eyes drift at him, but he just gazes at Ichigo dully, almost if he was made of air, like he couldn’t really see the young man standing there.

_”Don’t be surprised. Right now he is in a receiving state.”_

”A....what?”

_”It means, no one has given him orders yet. I must say I was almost surprised how well these parasites work with him. I was expecting him to struggle more.”_

The pink haired man holds his chin thoughtfully, examining the blue haired man almost curiously now. He’d fully expected some bit of the usually crude imbecile to surface once he saw his precious little lover, but it was clear Grimmjow was fully under his control right now.

Now, wasn’t that delightful.

Kurosaki was partially resistant to the parasite, but it did not matter. The boy was not supposed to survive this ordeal anyway.

”What do you mean orders? What did you do!?”

The man doesn’t respond, just smirks and activates the device on his hand. Grimmjow’s eyes sharpen in an instant, and he suddenly charges at Ichigo, who had barely any time to dodge the attack, watching in horror as deep gashes were left on the floor by Grimmjow’s inhuman claws.

The man spins around and kicks Ichigo in the stomach, sending him fly against the opposing wall.

The young man coughs out blood, looking around panicking; why was Grimmjow attacking him all of a sudden? Ichigo ducks out of another kick’s way, knowing if that would’ve hit his head, it would have likely broken his skull, judging by the crater it left to the wall.

”Grimm! Snap out of it!” He calls for the man desperately, but the blunet just cackles madly, his eyes bloodthirsty as he charges at Ichigo again.

_”My. I thought he’d be well-behaving this time. I suppose that sadistic glee is something inherent to his personality. At least he is more controllable now.”_

Szayel’s voice comments trough the speakers, but Ichigo ignores it. His mind was filled with panic and noise, but he could also feel something familiar creep into him. The man kicks him in the air, and actually jumps after him, striking him in the gut so Ichigo crashes against the floor, hard. He’d already been injured, so this was making everything worse. He rolls out of the drop-kick’s way, panting and coughing out blood.

Shit, this was bad.

As Grimmjow charges at him again, Ichigo recalls the training matches they’d done together and quickly pulls his arms up to cover himself from the punch.

It hurt, but at least did not collide with his stomach again.

He quickly swipes the man off his feet before he can use his claws to slash Ichigo’s face, and proceeds to kick him in the head, sending Grimmjow stumble several feet back. Ichigo was surprised that he was even able to do so, given how the man felt so much stronger now.

Perhaps because he didn’t hold back at all. The fact Ichigo had not died from the first strike was a testament that their training had done something to help.

The man spits out blood and attacks him again with a fierce growl, making them both stumble to the ground.

Grimmjow attempts to strike him in the face with his claws, but Ichigo dodges it, elbowing him in the gut and making him roll across the floor, stopping several feet away.

Ichigo looks around near frantic now, trying to come up with a way to make this stop. Grimmjow staggers back up, head tilted to the side lightly, and he stares at Ichigo with that out of place insane look for a moment.

No, not at him, rather, trough him.

It felt like Grimmjow did not really see him, but rather his instincts controlled him, telling him he was supposed to kill the presence near him.

It was like an extreme version of a Trance.

Like...like the ones Ichigo had had earlier. It reminds him of the thing he'd discussed with Grimmjow earlier on, about the mental imagery Urahara had asked Ichigo to use to help with his fits. Grimmjow said he had one as well, but it worked in reverse...

_”Really? I thought you were stronger than this, given Aizen-sama’s interest in you Kurosaki. Perhaps he severly overestimated you.”_

Ichigo ignores Szayel’s taunt, too busy dodging Grimmjow’s vicious attacks. The young man was struggling with himself too, given how his metahuman side also really wanted to make him get full into the action, something Ichigo did not want to do.

He did not want to hurt Grimm.

 

"Grimm, remember that conversation we had a while back? about the white cat thing?"

Another slash aimed at him, Ichigo jumps out of the way to not have his eyes ripped out of his head.

"You said, that yours works in reverse!"

A kick aimed at his gut, Ichigo grabs the leg and throws Grimmjow off balance, before backing further away, looking for a way to escape. The arena was shut tight, all doors closed.

The man growls at him, and Ichigo could have sworn even his fangs were sharper now. He manages to evade another slashing attack, which only manages to cut few strands of his hair and cause a slight scar on his neck.

"You need to try and reign in that beast again, I know you can do it! You've done so well for years!"

It did not seem like Grimmjow could hear his calls right now. Whatever was affecting him, it was powerful.

The pink haired man watches Ichigo jump away and dodge attacks aimed at him, refusing to fight the man properly, which irritated the scientist greatly. How was he supposed to get a proper data out of his test subjects when they refused to cooperate?

”Very well then, this is getting a bit too dull to watch since you just keep dodging and run away. I can’t get proper data out of this.” Szayel comments and does something on the console that was with him inside the room.

Soon, there was a faint hissing sound in the air, and Ichigo realizes to his horror, that the crazy bastard had unleashed some sort of gas in there.

Ichigo did not have to even ask what it was, for he could already feel the effect it had on his mind.

Even Grimmjow was affected, his attacks becoming even more fierce now - if that was even possible - including his roars that sounded more like the growls of a beast now rather than human. Ichigo kicks him aside, as far as he could, and backs away, holding his head.

_”While your unique origins might make you somewhat resistant to the toxin I just released, this one is my formula and will eventually overcome you, so why don’t you two fight until one of you drops dead. It will make this easier for you.”_

”....You crazy...bastard...what are you trying....?” Ichigo mutters out between gritted teeth, his vision slowly turning red.

The distant cackling echoed in his brain already.

_”Oh, I am just making this more interesting to record.”_

Szayel grins at him from behind the glass, and Ichigo felt the biggest urge he’d ever felt, to rip someone’s head off. As Ichigo lifts his gaze up, he sees Grimmjow lunge at him again, this time landing a hit on his face and making the young man stumble backwards, colliding with the wall again and coughing out more blood.

The fiery haired male manages to push himself out of the second strike’s way, watching in fear at the deep gashes left by the inhuman claws.

The blue eyes that normally held so much emotion were staring at him with intense blood-lust, and a second later, he sprints towards Ichigo, who again rolls out of the way, kicking his legs to make Grimmjow fall on the floor.

The man had expected this however and instead grabs Ichigo’s leg, throwing him up into the air, sending him fly up against the glass that Szayel stood behind with another, wicked laugh slipping out of his mouth.

The glass doesn’t break but the impact is enough to knock the air out of Ichigo’s lungs and startle the pink haired man, who backs away from his viewing spot.

Ichigo falls to the ground, breathing harshly, holding his bleeding chest. He was covered in blood and dust, his hair partially matted by it. He had a sneaking suspicion that had it not been for his metahuman genetics he also had, he’d died a while ago already.

He’s lost so much blood, and Ichigo could tell from the blurry vision he had that he did not have much time left.

The good thing was that his less-than-ideal state seemed to prevent him from going into frenzy as well despite the strange gas Szayel was using at them, a fact that seemed to irritate their crazy host, as when ichigo looked up, he could see the man frowning displeased.

Ichigo realizes that another slashing attack was heading towards him, and he rolls out of the way again, making Grimmjow slash the concrete wall instead, leaving actual marks to it. The young man staggers up and blocks a strike aimed at his head, kneeing Grimmjow in the gut and shoving him aside.

That action alone required a lot of effort due to his blood-loss, and Ichigo was taking in harsh breaths, nearly stumbling to the floor as his legs shook.

Grimmjow jumps up, kicking him in the jaw so hard that Ichigo saw stars. He flies backwards again, colliding with the ground. His vision was completely red, but for a different reason. it was his own blood, dripping to his eyes and making them sting.

Ichigo attempts to get up, but stumbles back on his knees, his head too dizzy.

Shit, this did not look good at all.

Grimmjow was marching towards him, with what meant a certain death for Ichigo if the man didn’t snap out of this, now. Suddenly, a strange sound breaks the air, making Grimmjow halt on his steps and look up as if trying to locate the source of the noise. Ichigo watches in disbelief as all the glass panels begin to open, including the one that protected Szayel from the toxin.

_”No! What is going on here?!”_

The man shrieks out and quickly works to turn off the toxin as expected, trying to hold his breath.

Ichigo stares up at him in disbelief, but his confusion is short lived as Grimmjow suddenly appears beside him, pinning the younger male to the ground with an animalistic growl, trapping his arms above his head. Ichigo was far too weak to even try to resist anymore, and he felt tears prickle his eyes now as well, and the salty water wipes some of the blood away from his face.

” _Grimm...remember...try to..._ ”

he gasps weakly, as the man lifts his clawed hand again to likely rip his throat open. It was no use, the man clearly could not hear nor recognize him, and Ichigo was too out of breath to speak anymore.

By a miracle, Ichigo manages to push himself up and plant their lips together one last time, tasting blood in the kiss given he was covered in it.

”I love you.” He coughs out with a smile, dropping his head back down to the ground, waiting for the sharp pain against his neck.

It never came.

For a moment, the blue eyes just stare at him, and then they begin to shift, turning more human bit by bit, until Grimmjow backs away, sitting on the ground and staring at Ichigo horrified.

He attempts to say something, but he was clearly in shock, so Ichigo just smiles at him weakly, coughing out blood.

”Morning.”

The man snaps out of it and crawls back to him, planting his hand gently against Ichigo’s cheek, eyes wide with worry and terror. Ichigo was covered in blood, his own blood. He’d been the one to do this.

”Fuck...I...I’m sorry...”

Ichigo just keeps smiling, feeling drowsy. He knew that falling unconscious was likely bad, but he had almost zero energy left. Grimmjow looks around frantic, and then hears some commotion above them. The stairs behind the closed door are filled with steps. The damn police had finally arrived and found the location thanks to his note and likely the jacket he'd left as a marker.

It was a small relief, but did not ease the panic in his head one bit, not when Ichigo was lying on the ground, bleeding to death because he lost control over himself.

Another sound catches his attention, and Grimmjow realizes Szayel was escaping.

Bit of bloodlust enters back into his system, but as he looks down, he is yet again reminded that Ichigo needed help, and fast. He just didn’t know what to do. There is banging at the door behind him, and Grimmjow looks around, finding the panel that would open it. Somehow, it had not been destroyed in the earlier chaos, and he sprints to it, activating the door mechanism so their aides could enter.

He rushes back to Ichigo, who was still miraculously conscious. Grimmjow pets his cheek now, and the young man manages to lift his hand to grasp his, just holding it there. ”I’m sorry.” Grimmjow repeats again, words that would never be enough for what he just did.

What Szayel almost made him do.

”It’s...okay. You weren’t...in control.” Ichigo tells him quietly, bringing his hand up to brush few strands of hair off Grimmjow’s face.

The first familiar voices could already be heard from behind them, but the man ignores those for now; it felt like the only people in the world right now were him and the severely wounded young man in his arms.

He’d never forgive himself for this.

..... _He'd never forgive Szayel for this._

As another, powerful urge creeps into him slowly, filling his mind with near uncontrollable rage, Grimmjow leans down and kisses Ichigo softly, to which the young man responds the best he could despite his weakened state, glad to have the blunet back.

Grimmjow eventually manages to coax himself into pulling away, glancing towards the group heading their way.

It was Yoruichi, holding a gun and looking positively shocked after she saw the state the two were in; she was also unnerved by the look Jeagerjaquez had on his face, the kind that spoke of death and destruction heading in someone's way.

Before she could ask anything however, Grimmjow gets up and tells her to bring Ichigo first aid ASAP.

She glances at the boy just once, and quickly grabs her radio, informing the paramedics on standby above to come and get him.

”Wait, where are you going?!” She yells after Grimmjow as the woman realizes he was heading deeper into the complex.

The man ignores her; he felt this strange pull in his mind again, something that was not quite his own thoughts, but it was hard to resist given it did slightly align with what he wanted to do right now.

Grimmjow knew all too well that following his urge right now...it was the wrong thing to do.

He could not help himself.

Szayel had to fuckin, ** _pay_** for this.

Within few seconds, the man had disappeared into the darkness, leaving a bloody trail after him.

 

 

 

Szayel was hurrying across the corridor, carrying the data and documents he’d managed to save from the place.

Since the police had finally found this place, he had no reason to stay.

Aizen-sama would not be happy with the fact that he had not managed to deliver on his promises - studying the new subject properly, and then disposing of it as well as the previous, failed experiments, but he had no choice; the police was there, and in all likeness the brute was after his blood as well. Once he reaches the back-door however, Szayel realizes it was locked.

He looks around frustrated, and then grabs his key code breaker, attempting to force the door open by hacking it.

It did not work; someone had disabled the lock, making it stuck in closed position.

Szayel bangs at the door frustrated, not understanding why it was stopping his escape. Then, he notices there was a note on the door. He recognizes the handwriting, and his eyes widen in shock.

_Aizen hopes you enjoy your playtime with his kitten._

It was Gin. That bastard, the right hand of Aizen-Sama, had locked him in.

Szayel looks around frantic, trying to find another route to escape. It was too late however.

As he turns around, he was confronted with blue eyes peering from the darkness. He grasps the controlling device hidden in his bag, attempting to smile like usual. ”I suppose I should not be surprised that you came after me.”

Grimmjow says nothing, his face unusually cold. He walks towards Szayel slowly, the black claws still visible in his hands, covered in blood. The man attempts to activate the device again to regain control, but to his horror, for some reason it did not work anymore; it seemed like the blue haired man's intense hatred for him somehow managed to override the impulses sent by his parasite.

Szayel backs away, but his path was blocked, and panic started to settle in for him.

”Alright look, I only attacked your sister because I was told to by Aizen! It was nothing personal, so it’s him you should be mad at, not me!”

The man doesn’t respond, his expression completely blank like before.

As he was only just a few feet away, Szayel pulls up his gun and attempts to fire, but his hand was shaking so bad he only manages to graze Grimmjow’s neck. The man pauses briefly, glancing at the injury disinterested, before looking at him again.

As the pink haired man attempts to shoot again, he realizes to his horror he was out of bullets.

”L-look, I am sure we can come to understanding! This was all just business, nothing personal!”

Grimmjow stops, towering over him now somewhat, eyes still blank.

”Yer right about one thing....”

He comments quietly, and then strikes his clawed hand into Szayel’s gut; tearing at his insides and making him cough blood, splattering it on top of the gore already covering the man. As he manages to lift his gaze, he sees a wicked grin on Grimmjow’s face, the one he’d aimed at Luppi back then when he’d killed him. The man licks off the blood from his lips, twisting his hand and causing excruciating pain to his prey.

”I _am_ a fucking monster.”

He yanks his arm back, making Szayel fall to the ground into a pool of blood. He gasps and groans, unable to breathe as his lungs were badly damaged.

Tesla’s words rang in his ears as his mind began to shut down.

 

_He will do the same thing to you, what he did to Luppi._

 

Grimmjow watches him gasp and wheeze for a few moments longer, until he falls silent, dead.

Suddenly, there were footsteps heading his way, and somebody stops nearby, wheezing as if they were out of breath.

”Yikes, ya really are one brutal test tube baby.” Grimmjow lifts his gaze slowly, and instantly recognizes the silver haired man who was standing further away, still breathing hard as if he’d ran from somewhere far, all the way to there.

It was Gin from the fight club, holding a device in his hand, similar kind of device Szayel had had.

”Sorry, sorry! I know I am late. I was trying ta stop ya from doin’ that, but I guess it’s too late now.”

Gin rubs his head, looking down at Szayel’s corpse, smiling awkwardly.

Grimmjow shifts and takes a step closer towards Gin, who backs away with an “eep” and throws the device around in his hands like a hot potato, before he finally manages to push the right button.

Grimmjow stops in an instant as a strange numbness fills his head, earlier bloodthirst slipping out of him like waterfall.

”Sorry about this, I hafta make sure ya won’t gut me too, it looks like a painful way ta go.”

Grimmjow just stares at the man, unable to really move, as if some weird force was keeping him in his place. What the hell was Gin doing there? Why did he have similar fucking thing as Szayel did?

Except… Gin was the person Szayel was talking about, wasn’t he?

Somebody who had observed him for a long time, and for as long as Grimmjow could recall, Gin had been running that underground fight club he’d gone to for years. He had been observing him and Nel…for Aizen

. Grimmjow wanted to demand answers from the man, but he was unable to resist whatever the device Gin had was doing to him, so the man just stood there, still covered in blood, his cat-like eyes glaring at the silver haired man.

After a moment, Gin finally composes himself, dusting off his clothes out of nervousness, and he looks at the blunet seriously now.

”You know...Aizen hoped Szayel woulda gotten enough info out of ya boyfriend and get rid of ya and yer sister afterwards, but y’see, it don’t sit right with me.” The white haired man rubs his head awkwardly.

It seemed like he was explaining his presence there to Grimmjow, giving the answers he knew the man wanted.

”Ya and yer sis are good people, Ichi is a good kiddo, n’ I dun really think this is the way to go for ya. So I uh...I opened the panels ta get Szayel to get rid of the gas; woulda done it sooner but I’m awful wit technology so took me a while ta find ta right button.” He laughs awkwardly, and then takes a step back as he sees a hint of earlier fury in Grimmjow’s eyes.

“ Ah! I-I _did_ try to stop ’im from making you to try and skewer your boyfriend too, but this thing has a very short range for some reason; I coulda not override Szayel as I couldn’t get to ta arena.”

Gin rubs his head again displaying the device in his hand as if to strengthen his point, and then turns more serious all of a sudden again.

Serious and seemingly void of all of his earlier nervousness and fear. It was an abrupt change in demeanor, that even in his sedated state, it made Grimmjow lift eyebrow at him.

”Szayel was using one of those nano-parasites he and Aizen made ta control ya, that’s what this remote is for. Ichi has one in his brain too, but it didn’t apparently work properly ‘cause he was able ta resist it earlier, n’ the gas didn’t do Szayel any favors either.”

So that’s what the injection had been, huh?

It was just like Szayel to put unwanted things inside people.

”Now then... in order ta set ya free from Aizen’s control completely, I hafta fry ta thing, which means I hafta fry a bit of yer brain too. You’ll live an’ heal from it cause of your genes, but you will be in a coma for a while.”

Grimmjow turns towards Gin slowly, but doesn’t attempt to bolt. He couldn't, and even if he could, Grimmjow was not sure if he would have anyway. Gin seemed...honest right now.

”As for why yer so docile right now, the thing is releasing sedatives in yer bloodstream. I figured I hafta calm ya down after that frenzy.”

Ah, so that’s why his head felt like he was high or some shit like that.

”Why are you helping me exactly, if ya work for Aizen?” His voice sounded strangely distant in his ears.

”I told ya, Ichi n’ you two are good people. Besides I think it’s time Aizen’s crazy antics start coming to an end before more innocents get hurt.” Gin shrugs, and then looks at the blunet with a softer look.

”I was there y know, when you were a baby. I doubt ya remember me as I really just observed, didn’t interact with ya much, but.... yer a good kid on the inside, like Ichi. I don’t like doin’ this to ya.”

Before Grimmjow could react, an intense pain hit his head and he collapsed to the floor, blacking out instantly.

”But I got no choice. This is ta only way ta save ya two for now; gotta finish what Masaki-Chan started back then.”

Gin mutters, glancing towards the corridor as he heard voices running towards them.

Without a word, he vanishes back into shadows.

 

 

 

When Ichigo came to, he was in a hospital. His entire body hurt like hell.

There was a familiar voice calling for him next to his bed, and as Ichigo tilts his head, he finds Yuzu’s big teary eyes stare at him.

”...Hey.” Ichigo manages to greet her with a smile, and she bursts into tears, grabbing him into a hug, only to back away as Ichigo flinches and reminds her of his injuries.

”I am so glad you are alive! You lost so much blood, and, and...”

”Yuzu, he still needs rest.”

Ichigo turns his head slowly, and finds his dad on the other side of the bed. He was putting on a brave face, but Ichigo could tell the old man was holding back tears as well.

”Who went and died?” Ichigo attempts to jest, gaining a familiar huff from nearby as Karin appears beside Isshin.

” _You_ almost did! Your heart stopped in the ambulance, and we thought...” She swallows down harsly, wiping her eyes.

Ichigo just smiles at them apologetic, having nothing to say to make it better.

His mind soon drifts to something else however, or to be exact, someone else.

”Where...” His family look at each other with strange looks, before Isshin breaks the silence.

”That is something...Urahara needs to explain to you.”

Oh god, no.

Ichigo’s eyes widen in shock, but before he could ask the dreaded question, the hatted man appears in the room and upon seeing Ichigo’s face, requests his family to leave for now.

He sits down at the chair Yuzu had occupied, and Ichigo looks at him helplessly.

”Is he....”

”Grimmjow-san is not dead; he is in a coma. We found both him and the scientist at the northern exit of the complex. I have to hand it to him, we would not have spotted the entrance had he not left his jacket out there for us to see.”

He pauses, sighing and rubbing his eyes.

”The scientist was dead, the pink haired man. Somebody literally ripped his guts out.”

Ichigo could tell from Urahara’s expression, just who this somebody was that the man was referring to.

”He was not...in control of himself. Grimmjow would not have done it otherwise, I...I think.” Ichigo was not that certain about it, recalling the expression the man had before he'd left his side.

”It is likely.”

As Ichigo looks at him surprised, Urahara proceeds to explain.

”I looked through the files and data Szayel had in his possession. It is very likely Grimmjow-san was still under some sort of influence or so when he went after the scientist who kidnapped you. We also found a small microchip in his brain that had been overloaded, and likely caused the coma.”

Ichigo blinks, surprised about that.

”You had one too, though we took it off during the surgery we had to do to save your life.”

Ichigo just gazes at Urahara, trying to process all this information.

”There was so much more going on than we thought. It was not just Aizen modifying children. He was literally creating life from scratch.”

”What do you mean?”

”Ichigo...Grimmjow-san and Nelliel-Chan are not humans, not in the traditional sense. Aizen created them.”

The brown eyes widen in shock, and then it turns into a frown as he thinks back on the files he’d seen.

”I...see. That explains some bits of the files I saw then.”

”Yes, we found those documents as well. It must have been a shock to see your mother involved in them.”

Ichigo just nods a bit, releasing a slow sigh as he gazed the ceiling.

”For a second I thought I’d been...y’know...” His face flushed, and he could not make himself say it.

”Don’t worry. He is in no way blood-related to you, for Masaki-chan only watched after him like a big sister when he was growing up in the lab; it seems she was the only one who could calm Grimmjow down and prevent violent outbursts when he was a child .”

Urahara comments with an amused smile, but it doesn’t stay up for long.

”Whoever did that to him, made Grimmjow to fall into a coma did not intend to kill him it seems. The scarred tissue is in fact already healing according to my last checks. He’ll wake up, we just don’t know when, or if he’ll remember anything.”

Ichigo sighs, slumping back into the bed. He could live with that.

He’d get Grimmjow to like him again if he forgot.

He’d do so even if it took him a lifetime.

”There are still....so much we don’t even understand, so I suggest you focus on recovering yourself, before trying to process all of this.”

”How about my...issue?” Ichigo had to ask, despite Urahara telling him to just rest for now.

”We seem to have good news regarding to that; now that I understand better what the secret behind Grimmjow’s genetics is, I can create a proper cure for you. The mental part however....” Urahara sighs and gives him a sad smile.

”You likely will need a psychiatrist after all this.”

Ichigo just nods, fully agreeing with Urahara.

”Is Nel okay?”

”She is distraught about her brother, but Harribel-san is with her. We chose not to reveal her unusual origin to her for she still doesn't quite remember; Nelliel would in all likeness not be able to handle all that at the moment.”

 

Yeah, Urahara was probably right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. a longer chapter.   
> This was hard to write as fight scenes aren't my speciality.   
> Also, it took me a long time to decide what happens after Grimmjow skewers Szayel. I kept switching between jailtime and the coma thing, and decided to go with the latter as I felt it would work better for the story.   
> When I spoke of foreshadowing in that one chapter, I was referring to Grimmjow threatening to kill Szayel if he hurt Ichigo. I planned that from the start, I just wasn't entirely sure then how it will happen.  
> In the end, I wanted it to be more in line with the actual Grimmjow, I.E kind of brutal.  
> ....now I need to think how to deal with the consequences of that mess. 
> 
> The next chapter will showcase the fight from Grimmjow's P.O.W a bit, to open up what was going on inside his mind then.


	22. Lonesome

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Months after the events from the laboratory, Ichigo is still trying to process everything that happened, all the while stuck in a depressive state over Grimmjow's coma.

_First, everything was black, like he couldn’t see anything._

_Then, light._

_Distant noises, someone was talking._

_He could not recognize the voice for some reason, despite something in him stating he knew that voice._

_After a moment, it was as if someone had turned a switch or something, he gets up._

_Something stood few feet away from him._

_He stares at it dully._

_Something fiery catches his eye. It was familiar, but that distant memory was nothing but an echo in his mind, it was not important._

_More distant words._

_Then, another shift in the air. His instincts sharpen, and his gaze focuses on the ginger in front of him. He didn’t know why, but something was telling him to kill that kid._

_It was an order._

_So, he attacked._

_The boy was stronger than he expected; despite his injured state, he was able to throw him around quite a bit. It was thrilling, and he could hear the twisted laughter escaping from his lips, a sign he was enjoying it._

_The boy was trying to talk to him, but he couldn’t hear the words._

_They did not matter._

_Red was slowly spreading to the ground, and all over his opponent, further fueling his bloodlust._

_His prey did not even try to injure him. He just kept dodging, trying to avoid his attacks._

_It annoyed him._

_There were voices around him again. He could hear a sound, almost like a gas leak. A wave of bloodlust hit him, and he attacks his prey twice as hard. The bastard was pissing him off, not even trying to fight back._

_He grabs the ginger’s leg, throwing him up into the air with a laugh, watching as the bastard collides with the glass, leaving a satisfying red stain on it, before collapsing back to the ground._

_He charges for him, the bastard dodges again; making him hit the wall instead. He gets pissy, and after his prey lands another distancing kick on him, he moves to kick the bastard on the jaw, knocking him to the ground._

_It was clear he was not getting up anymore._

_He walks towards his prey, smelling to fear from him._

_There was....something familiar about the scent too, but his mind was too far gone in blood thirst for him to recognize it._

_A loud sound breaks the air, making him stop briefly._

_After a moment, the air clears._

_He ignores it, going for his prey, ready to finish him off._

_Pinning him down against the hard ground, he notes that despite all the blood, he could tell his opponent had brown eyes._

_Tears ran down his cheeks, but not out of fear, not really._

_It... confused him slightly, but he attempted to ignore it._

_The prey was still trying to talk to him._

_He lifts his claws to shut him up for good._

_Suddenly, the badly injured ginger lifts his head, and plants their lips together._

_He freezes._

_It was familiar._

_This felt familiar._

_The young man says something, a smile on his lips despite everything._

_”....love you.”_

_He drops back down, all the fight having left from his body._

_The man examines his prey more closely._

_Ginger...fiery orange hair, warm brown eyes..._

**_I love you_ **

_An image flashes in his head, of someone resting beside him, cuddled up against his chest._

_The same young man, arguing with him about something silly._

_Helping him find his sister, patching his injuries._

_Doing what he just..._

**_Oh god_ **

_What the hell was he doing?!_

_Grimmjow backs away, watching the image in front of him in horror._

_It was Ichigo._

_He was....he was trying to kill Ichigo._

_Kurosaki smiles at him._

_”Morning.”_

 

 

 

Ichigo gazed out into the rain from his window.

It matched his current mood fairly well.

Yuzu steps in; informing Ichigo that food was done. The youth just nods, not looking at her. The girl watches her brother with worry. He’d been like this ever since Grimmjow... ever since he fell into a coma. It had been six months since, and she had not seen Ichigo crack even a tiny smile.

After the whole ordeal was over, Urahara had in the end informed Ichigo’s friends what exactly had happened. He left out the part about Grimmjow being the one who’d nearly killed Ichigo, simply stating that it had been an experiment gone wrong from the man who kidnapped him. It was not exactly a lie, but it was not the whole truth either. Ichigo was thankful the man had not told them all of the details.

The last thing he could remember was the horrified look on Grimmjow’s face, once he’d realized what he’d done.

Ichigo did not want his friends to...hate the man for it, if he’d wake up.

Urahara had reassured Ichigo back then that he would, but it had been half a year now, and...

”Ichi?”

The young man sighs and gets up from his chair, following Yuzu downstairs.

The dinner was unusually quiet; then again they had been for the past months. Like Urahara had recommended, Ichigo had gone to a psychiatrist to help recovering from his trauma, but he wasn’t sure if it was working so far. He had not seen Nel or Harribel since, they’d chosen not to show their faces for him for now, likely thinking they would make him feel worse.

They felt guilty over what had happened.

Ichigo did not agree with the notion, but he did not have the mental energy to try and inform the two women about this.

Ichigo pokes his food absent-minded, not really feeling hungry.

His mind drifts back several months back.

 

After being discharged from the hospital, Ichigo had been pretty much jumped by his friends, all of them displaying their worry and relief in differing ways. Orihime had begun to cry, stating she was glad Ichigo was alive, whereas Rukia had berated him, telling him he should never again scare them like this. Renji just patted his back and told him to get back on his feet soon, although it was clear he was holding back tears and hiding it badly.

Chad was calm as ever; just stating simply he was glad Ichigo was still alive. It had been nice at that moment, but his good mood did not last long.

The more time passed, the more hopeless he felt; despite Urahara's initial confidence, there were no signs of Grimmjow waking up. As more and more months had passed, Ichigo had begun to doubt if he'd ever wake up after all.

Ichigo hated the thought that the last thing Grimmjow could remember before he’d fallen into coma would be blood and violence.

He also hated how he could not sleep properly anymore, when Grimmjow wasn’t there beside him.

The good thing was, Urahara had come up with a serum regarding to his metahuman genetics. It could not entirely neutralize them, but Ichigo no longer had Trance-fits.

It did not seem to matter as now he had genuine trauma and nightmares that haunted him.

Usually, it was about the battle.

How Grimmjow almost killed him. Ichigo always woke up moments before death took him, panting heavily and covered in cold sweat.

He hated it.

He hated those dreams, because it wasn’t Grimmjow’s fault.

He hated the thought he was afraid of him now.

The doctor had given him some sleeping pills to help with his insomnia, but they did not always work.

Ichigo was reluctant to tell her about what exactly had happened down there. He did not.... he did not want people to misunderstand.

Grimmjow had never meant to hurt him, the reaction he had had the second he snapped out of it proved this.

The past months they’d spent together proved it.

”Ichigo?”

The young man snaps out of his thoughts and looks up at his dad. Karin and Yuzu were already cleaning the table, and Isshin squeezes his shoulder, clear worry in his eyes.

”Can we...talk for a moment?” Ichigo glances at his food that had gone cold and nods, getting up and following his dad to his room.

Isshin sits at his bed, the same spot Grimmjow had sat on when he’d visited that one time. The thought made his heart ache, but Ichigo did not show it on his face, just slumping down to sit on the chair beside his table.

”Son...” Isshin rubs his head, unsure on how to approach this.

”It’s been over six months. You still haven’t really smiled even once. Are you...certain this psychiatrist thing is working for you?”

Ichigo shrugs, not really wanting to talk about it. He knew that was not what his dad wanted to say anyway.

”Ichigo. I understand you are mourning.”

The man began, and the youth turns his gaze back to his dad, waiting for him to finish. It was clear whatever Isshin was going to say, he figured Ichigo would not like it.

”You have to understand. There is a chance he won’t ever wake up again. Despite Urahara’s initial thoughts, his healing halted. And even if he did....”

”Dad.” Ichigo cuts him off with a harsh tone, harsher than he intended.

”Ichigo, I know you care about him, but consider this; even if he does wake up, he may no longer remember you. Even if he does...after all that has happened, is it wise for you to...stay?”

Ichigo just glares at his father.

He did get where the old man was coming from; their last interaction had been traumatizing, but the thing was, it _wasn’t Grimmjow’s fault._

Why was that so hard for people to understand?

He was not the one trying to hurt Ichigo on purpose, he was merely being used as a tool against his will, and he’d been hurt by the situation as bad as Ichigo.

Sure, given Aizen was still out there... Grimmjow was a liability, given how he could be triggered into such a violent frenzy without the man’s consent. He was even now kept in a highly secure facility, made sure that no rat of Aizen would reach him. Ichigo was terrified every day that they’d just choose to pull the plug on him, figuring it would be easier than finding a way to make Grimmjow immune to any further mind control attempts, let alone trying to locate Aizen and end it once and for all.

Sometimes he felt the only reason they hadn’t done it yet was Nelliel and Harribel; the two women clearly loved Grimmjow as part of their family, and would not take kindly on such betrayal. They were also metahumans, and while not as powerful as Grimmjow, Ichigo doubted the force wanted to have those two get mad at them.

”All I am saying is...do not wait for something that may never come back.”

”I can’t. You’re asking me to just...abandon him. I can’t do that, not after everything he’s been through.”

Isshin sighs, shaking his head with a sad smile.

”I suppose I understand how you feel. When Masaki died, I was willing to face even the death itself to bring her back, but I knew it was not possible, so I rationalized with myself, focusing on taking cate of you three.”

” _Grimm is not dead!_ ”

Ichigo sits up and spats at his face, before turning on his heels and heading downstairs, grabbing his coat. Karin sees him pass by and asks where he was going, to which Ichigo simply responds with ’out,’ before vanishing out from the door.

He walks across the streets several miles, trying to calm down. It was cold and snow covered the ground, making Ichigo regret the choice of not putting on a hat. Still though, he refuses to go back home, not wanting to face his dad right now.

He understood where Isshin was coming from, he really did. His dad just didn't want Ichigo to further harm himself, he was dealing with a lot of trauma already, and having him be in constant mourning like this, it did not help. Wallowing in self-pity did not do any favors to anyone.

But he just...couldn’t stop himself.

Plus, it would not be fair towards Grimmjow, for him to just walk away, after what happened.

Ichigo wanted to see him awake, at least one last time, just to...talk to him.

Tell him that it really was okay, he did not blame him for what happened.

He...he hadn’t said those words for no reason.

Ichigo huffs and kicks a rock on the street, making it collide with a nearby tree trunk. He was at the park, near the spot where he’d trained with Grimmjow several times. Those memories felt so distant now, he could barely even remember what his voice sounded like. It was frustrating, apparently another symptom of his trauma; everything relating to the event six months ago had turned hazy, and Ichigo hated it.

He did not care about the violence he faced; he wanted to remember. He wanted to remember how Grimmjow sounded like, how he used to tease him over silly things, how he supported him emotionally despite being mentally exhausted himself.

He wanted to remember the man he loved, why was that so wrong?

Cursing out loud, Ichigo kicks another stone, making it fly in the air, landing in the middle of the river and cracking the ice that had formed there. Ichigo watches as the stone settles on top of the cracks, not quite breaking the ice.

It was how he felt right now; barely held together, with cracks forming everywhere, and it was only a matter of time before he’d shatter completely, someone only had to throw a bigger boulder on him.

Isshin had almost done it earlier, but he’d somehow managed to keep it together.

The young man sighs and sits down to the nearest bench, just watching humans walk by as time moved on.

Some of them looked at him curiously, but chose not to disturb Ichigo upon seeing his solemn gaze.

His phone beeps and Ichigo checks it, finding a text from worried Yuzu.

_Are you okay?_

Yeah, just needed some fresh air. 

_Okay. Come back soon, the snowfall will get heavier later on, we don’t want you to catch a cold._

Ichigo rolls his eyes as he types his reply.

Yes, mother. 

 

As he gazes at the text he sent, Ichigo’s mind drifts again, this time to the discussion he’d had with Urahara regarding to his mother.

 

 

”She was one of Aizen’s first test subjects, which is why she was kept in the laboratory. The reason your mother was chosen to take care of Grimmjow when he was a child, was because she had apparently encountered him as a tiny baby just months after he’d successfully been born. Unlike with others, he had not thrown a fuss, so after Grimmjow began to have temper tantrums, he’d figured he could use your mother for more than just testing his serum.”

Ichigo had just nodded; looking through the photos and files Urahara had shown him. He brushed his fingers over the one that had toddler-sized Grimmjow sitting on Masaki’s lap, when she red a book for him.

”Masaki-Chan apparently had help from someone when she escaped, but unfortunately this someone could not prevent her from getting caught and nearly dying. Or perhaps the person gave her out to their leader, we still do not know for sure.”

”She would have come back for him if she’d remembered, mum always kept her promises.”

Ichigo had mused out, more to himself than Urahara, who had just nodded, humming in agreement.

Ichigo had kept those photos, he’s requested from Urahara if he could have them, and the man had agreed eventually, figuring majority of the pictures were of no use for them.

Ichigo kept them in a scrapbook hidden in his drawer, sometimes he’d pull it out just to look through them. There had been more than the initial few Ichigo had first seen when looking through the files by himself. Grimmjow swinging around a plush whose limb he’d accidentally torn off, the blue haired toddler reaching up for Masaki, clearly wanting to be picked up, things like that.

Ichigo had no clue who took the photos, but he figured they had been necessary to keep a record on Grimmjow’s development. Some were less happy, showcasing the small child during his examinations, looking clearly distressed and not liking to be there.

It was clear he preferred being with Masaki, which Ichigo did not blame Grimmjow for; his mum had been pretty great.

The photos where he was older looking, likely around the age of seven or older, had a drastic change in demeanor.

Those photos had Nel in them, but not Masaki.

It was likely from the time after she escaped.

They did not know this for certain, but Ichigo had a feeling they'd lied to him and claimed Masaki had died already back then, as the young man felt Grimmjow would have come to look for her otherwise.

Grimmjow’s eyes no longer shone with the same innocence, he had a permanent scowl on his face Ichigo recognized from the current times.

He always looked either angry, bored or exhausted.

He’d also noted that Grimmjow’s frame had shifted quite a bit during his teenage years. Between the photos with just few months between them in the dates, he’d gone from an average scrawny teenager to the size he was now, or close to it.

It was...weird to have those photos, it was almost like watching Grimmjow’s life story unfold in front of his eyes, in the form of a several photographs.

A family photo album with a sinister undertone to it.

The photo that always freaked Ichigo out the most was the one that was apparently dated near the day Grimmjow had been driven to kill Luppi.

It looked almost like those police line-up photos with the way it was shot from the front.

He had bits of blood on him, and his expression was stoic, disinterested almost.

There was a mad glint to his eyes however, that made the photograph more terrifying the longer you looked at it; you almost expected Grimmjow to start grinning at you like a madman.

Ichigo did not know why he kept that one, maybe it was just hard for him to give up on anything that related to Grimmjow.

Ichigo’s favorite picture was the one, clearly taken by his mum, given Ichigo could see her feet on it. It was toddler Grimmjow, reaching up towards her with curious, bright eyes, almost if he wanted to take the camera and see what it was.

He did not have his claws on in this picture like in some others, making Grimmjow appear like a regular child, aside from the catlike eyes.

The orangette sighs and leans back on the bench, letting snow fall on his face for a bit.

The cold droplets helped him to clear his head, and once Ichigo opened his eyes again, he realized he was not alone anymore.

Rukia stood there in front of him, holding a scarf and a hat on her hand. Without a word, Ichigo takes the offered garments and puts them on. Yuzu had likely informed his friends that he’d gone out, and given he usually liked to go to the park to brood, it was easy for Rukia to find him. The young woman sits down beside him, just gazing the scenery quiet for a moment.

”You miss him a lot.”

It was a neutral statement, and Ichigo gives her a noncommittal hum.

”Can you tell me why? None of really understand what happened between you two.”

Ichigo remains quiet for a long time, then turns to look at her cautiously.

There was no judgment in her eyes, she just wanted to understand. Ichigo feels his resolve crumble, and he spills everything out to her, everything from the reason why he began to have matches with Grimmjow, to how he eventually fell for him, to the connection they shared trough Masaki.

He reluctantly describes her events that had transpired that day, on that underground lab, holding his head and hiding his face, his voice getting shakier with each word that dropped out of his mouth. In the end, they both just sat there silent, and Ichigo was too scared to look up at her.

”I see...that definitely explains why you seem so... depressed right now.”

Ichigo dares a glance up at her, and again, Rukia’s eyes were not judgmental, just understanding.

”I hate it, Rukia. The thought that the last thing he ever did for me, before lapsing into coma was all that. He must hate himself for it, and I...I...” Ichigo rubs his eyes, holding back tears the best he could. He did not really want to break down in a public area like this. Rukia remains quiet, just gently places a hand on his back.

”What if that is the reason he’s not waking up? Because he thinks I blame him for it...”

”Don’t be silly Ichigo; I’m fairly certain he knows you don’t. He’s smarter than he looks.” The orangette actually manages a laugh a bit at that remark, it sounded so strange given he had not done it for months.

”I doubt he’d want you to beat yourself over this.” The black haired woman adds after a moment with a soft tone, still gently rubbing her friend’s back.

Yeah, she was probably right, but Ichigo could not help himself. He’d been blaming himself for the past months so much already.

”Come on, the wind is getting colder. We should head home.”

Rukia tells him after a moment of silence, getting up and offering her hand to Ichigo. Without a word, the orangette takes it, allowing her to lead him away from the park.

 

 

That night, his sleep was restless again.

This time though, it was not a nightmare about him fighting crazed version of Grimmjow.

_It was him, standing in the middle of an all-out blackness, trying to search for a patch of white he just couldn’t see._

_Ichigo kept walking in the darkness, feeling like he was walking through thick mud. It got worse and worse overtime, until he had to stumble to the ground, just sitting there and gazing down to his lap, void of energy. It was silent now, no crazy laughter echoing in the air, no feeling of eyes on him. It was.... lonely._

_Ichigo could feel tears start running down his cheeks almost involuntarily, warm salty trails that dripped to the floor, the sound echoing all around him._

_All he heard was that tiny sound, droplets of water hitting the ground, one by one._

_One by one._

_Again and again. ......_

_Footsteps._

_They were distant at first, barely audible, but soon, Ichigo could make them out. They were quiet, almost if soft paws touching the ground, with only tiny sounds coming from the claws hitting the ground with each step._

_Soon, he felt it behind him. Ichigo turns, his vision still blurred._

_The white feline looks at him, tilting its head to the side as it sits down. Ichigo rubs his eyes, then turns slowly, cautiously reaching for the beast. It shifts and moves closer, resting its giant head on Ichigo’s lap. The young man mingles his fingers into the soft fur, burying his nose against the top of its head, closing his eyes and just breathing in the familiar scent._

_”Please...come back. It wasn’t your fault.”_

_He mutters into the soft fur, gaining no response from his companion, other than a contended purr as it presses closer, enveloping Ichigo into its warmth. Ichigo shifts too, resting against the beast’s side now, buried into the white fur._

_He could feel the blue eyes watch him through the darkness._

 

 

 

”He’s missing.”

It felt like somebody had just given him an electric jolt, then stabbed him right through his heart.

Urahara had appeared to their house that morning, stating he had news for Ichigo. It had been a month since the conversation with Rukia, and she had shared the story with the rest of his friends with Ichigo’s permission, making them more understanding of his state, though also even more concerned.

The good thing had been that telling them the truth honestly had eased Ichigo’s heart a little, making him feel better, a change his family and psychiatrist had noticed. Even his dreams had eased, and he had not seen nightmares for three weeks now, sleeping much better. 

Now, it felt like all of it was going down the drain.

”The nurse that was going to check on his vitals three days ago, found his bed was empty.”

”Do you have....was it...?”

”No, it seems like he left by himself. There were no signs of a struggle or anybody being dragged away.”

Ichigo could understand why Urahara was concerned; if Grimmjow had left on his own, they had no clue of his mental state, or if he even remembered anything. In that state, he could be highly volatile and a danger to others.

”Did you guys ask if Harribel or Nel had seen him?”

”Yes, but he had not shown up. They’re both highly worried.”

”So are you guys looking for him now?”

Urahara pauses, examining Ichigo in silence for a moment.

”To be honest, I advised Ukitake to be cautious right now regarding to the next step of action; given we do not know of his mental state, having a group of random officers approach him could trigger a violent reaction.”

”So what are you gonna do?” Ichigo asks panicked; this could end really badly.

What if Grimmjow accidentally hurt someone?

What if an officer shot him?

”....Do you perhaps have any idea where he could have gone?”

Ichigo pauses, taken aback by the question. He then thinks back on all those months ago.

”We already checked the more usual places, but there was no sign of him, and the fight club he used to go to was shut down around the time your kidnapping happened.”

Ichigo lifts eyebrow at that, but says nothing. If Grimmjow was not in any of his usual places, maybe it meant he couldn’t remember like they’d feared? That meant he could be anywhere. However...two days was an awfully long time for someone with no memory to stay missing. Usually somebody would have spotted him by now, wandering around dispriented and not knowing what to do. Ichigo had a gut feeling that Grimmjow was making himself hard to find on purpose.

If that was the case... it still did not help, he could be anywhere.

”I...don’t know. If he is not in any of the usual places, I don’t really know where he could’ve gone.”

Urahara nods after a moment, still examining Ichigo from under his hat with that slightly unnerving look, the kind that made you feel like he saw right through you.

”Well...if he shows up here, I recommend being careful. Like I stated multiple times before, we do not know what his mental state is.”

Ichigo just nods, swallowing down hard.

 

 

That night, Ichigo lied awake in bed, unable to sleep.

He was so worried, and frustrated that he couldn’t do anything to help. As the young man flops on his belly, his phone suddenly beeps on the night desk, and Ichigo picks it up, wondering who would message him this late in the night.

His heart nearly stops as he recognizes the number.

His fingers tremble, nearly making him unable to open the message to read it, but eventually he manages to do it.

_”Cemetery near the park. Come now if you still wanna talk to me.”_

Ichigo got up faster than a blink of an eye, shoving the phone in his pocket after dressing up, and sneaking out of the window.

 

The weather was a bit warmer now as they were heading towards the spring, but the wind was still chilly, and even the hoodie Ichigo had tugged on was not quite enough to ward the cold.

He did not care about it however, rushing towards the cemetery like devil itself was after him.

It was foolish and pitiful, for him to be this anxious and in a hurry, but Ichigo couldn’t help himself.

Once he reaches the cemetery, Ichigo is out of breath, and he looks around cautiously. The cemetery was kind of creepy at night, especially given the fact he was by himself. Ichigo passes around the gravestones, trying to spot anyone that could be visiting there at this hour. At first, Ichigo could not see anyone, and his heart sinks. Then, he spots a wisp of smoke further away, and begins heading towards the spot uphill, soon realizing he was in fact heading towards his mother’s grave.

Of course, it made sense.

Which meant....Grimmjow did remember. The initial worry of him ending up with an amnesia was not true, was it?

Once he reaches the top, he sees a lone figure, standing in front of Masaki’s gravestone with a lit cigarette on his lips.

Ichigo feels his body freeze, and he is suddenly unable to come closer, or even say a word.

It was almost if he feared that the second he stepped closer, the man would disappear like a mirage dissipating into thin air.

He was wearing a new jacket with a furry collar on it, not the one he'd had back then, indicating Grimmjow had visited home at some point. His hair was also much neater than what it had been when he'd been lying on a bed in coma. The man was still paler than normal, and his frame was leaning more towards the scrawny teenager now, as he'd lost muscle mass while in deep slumber. 

Grimmjow blows some smoke out of his lungs, blue eyes locked at the gravestone in front of him.

His expression was stoic and he did not turn to look at Ichigo, but the young man had a feeling Grimmjow knew he was there.

”.....I feel kinda bad now, that I didn’t say anythin’ ta her last time I was here.” Grimmjow’s voice was quiet; raspy from under use for several months, and it was the most beautiful sound Ichigo had heard in ages.

Why had he ever thought he could be afraid of Grimmjow?

His eyes start tearing up again much to his frustration, and Ichigo brushes them away, before walking beside him slowly, turning to look down at the gravestone as well.

”She’d understand. She forgot you first.”

Grimmjow hums at that, taking a drag from his cigarette.

”Still though....she meant a lot ta me back then. The fact they...those bastards managed to erase her from my mind completely, it pisses me off.”

Ichigo glances at Grimmjow, seeing a hint of the familiar fire appear in those blue eyes. The man remained otherwise stoic however; as if too wary to show his anger fully after what happened the last time they’d seen each other. Ichigo wanted to reassure him, to tell Grimmjow it was okay, but he’d lost his voice.

All he could do was stare at him, examine every inch of the man’s face to try and burn it to his memory in case his brain wanted to make it fuzzy again.

”It’s kinda weird though, Y’know.”

”.....What is?” Ichigo asks quietly, almost if he was also afraid to raise his own voice.

Grimmjow glances at him, before blowing a cloud of smoke from his mouth.

”If she’d pulled her plan off when it came ta me, we woulda grown up as brothers.”

Ichigo blinks, and then realizes that Grimmjow was most likely right. The thought was so weird it made Ichigo chuckle, before tentatively reaching for Grimmjow’s shoulder. The man did not flinch nor move away at the touch, not that Ichigo understood why he feared he would.

”...I suppose, for what it’s worth, I prefer what we have now.”

He bites his lip, realizing that could be taken the wrong way, but as he looks up, he just sees the blue eyes examine him stoic, before a faint, teasing smile appears on Grimmjow’s face.

”Yeah, it’s the only way fer ya to get laid anyway.”

Ichigo huffs at that, feeling his cheeks gain color, but eventually he just smiles and shakes his head, looking back down at his mum’s gravestone.

”It’s so you, to put it that way.”

Grimmjow huffs, but Ichigo could literally hear the smile from his tone. For a moment, neither of them spoke. Finally, Ichigo manages to gather his courage, and tentatively reaches his hand up to press it against Grimmjow’s cheek, making the man turn to look at him properly now.

”I...what happened back then...”

Grimmjow’s expression shifts slightly more solemn, but only for a brief moment. Ichigo lifts his other hand as well, until it was pressed against Grimmjow’s cheek as well.

”It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you for it.” Ichigo felt so relieved to be able to finally say that to him.

Grimmjow just gazes at him with a stoic look, before sighing, dropping hid cigarette to the ground and stomping on it lightly to turn it off.

”I know. Doesn’t exactly change what happened.”

”Maybe so, but I...I just want you to know, I haven’t changed my mind about you.” Ichigo tells him softly, slipping his hands down to rest against Grimmjow’s chest, feeling the strong heartbeat even though the jacket he wore.

”When I said what I said...” Ichigo swallows down nervously, looking up at him. ”...I meant it. I still do.”

Grimmjow kept his face stoic again, but there was a hint of relief and cautious joy in those blue eyes, like he’d actually thought Ichigo had begun to hate him, or worse, fear him, after what happened.

To further drive the point home, Ichigo reaches up to gently press their lips together. It was a very chaste kiss, hesitant in nature, but it was enough to ignite whatever had been flickering within Ichigo once again, filling him with warmth.

”Yeah well, ya have a shitty taste.” Grimmjow remarks once they separate, making Ichigo roll his eyes at the blunet.

They stood there in silence, just examining each other quietly for a long moment.

”Ichigo.”

The orangette looks at him surprised; Grimmjow did not usually use his first name, but now he did, and the serious look on his face was worrying. The man reaches up cautiously, gently grasping his arms and rubbing them, until they felt warm; Ichigo had not even noticed they’d gone cold, not until Grimmjow’s touch warmed them again.

”I gotta go.”

”What do you mean?” The young man asks almost too quickly, feeling his heartbeat fasten in his chest.

”As long as Aizen’s out there, bein’ near me ain’t safe for anybody.”

”I don’t care about that! You can’t just go and isolate yourself away from people who——”

He was swiftly silenced by a fierce kiss pressed against his mouth, and for a moment his thoughts swim in a hazed mess, as he presses as close to the older man as he could, responding to the intense heat.

”Lemme finish, you impatient fuck!”

Grimmjow growls at him lowly, still unable to properly raise his voice. Ichigo just looks up at him, firmly pressed against Grimmjow’s chest.

”There’s been some shit happening apparently, after what went down. Aizen’s shit is falling apart, which means he’s gonna be extra dangerous right now. I spoke ta the mad hatter, and he agreed it would be better if I ’disappeared’ for a bit, until shit calms down.”

”But what about Nel and Harribel?”

”Aizen ain’t gonna care about them anymore. The shit Nel was gonna tell is out now anyway. I’m just gonna put them in danger if I stick by.”

Ichigo did not agree with that assessment at all, and he let it show on his face. Grimmjow huffs at him irritated, but then just kisses Ichigo again, as if unable to stop himself from doing it. His grip on Ichigo’s arms slackens, and the younger male instantly wraps them around his neck, kissing back with the kind of intensity that would leave them both breathless.

”Look. I just need some time ta clear my head, and so do you. I heard from Nel when I dropped by just how bad it was fer ya. Neither of us is in no shape to deal with...this, right now. " Grimmjow's tone softens a bit, and Ichigo understood what he meant. The man probably had a point. They both had gone trough something seriously traumatizing, and likely needed time to adjust themselves before they could even consider the thing between them.

Still, Ichigo did not like the idea of him disappearing somewhere out there.

"It’s not like I’m gonna completely drop off the face of earth or something. M’just taking a leave like I did years ago.”

Oh....right. Ichigo vaguely recalled Harribel mentioning that Grimmjow had disappeared for about a year after Nelliel had come back from the asylum, in a worse condition than she’d gone in.

”I thought you did not want to hide like that anymore.”

”This is different. I’m not running away from my problems; m'takin' my time to deal with them, but I cannot do it here right now.” Grimmjow huffs at him, pressing their foreheads together. He was so warm, especially against the cold air surrounding them.

”Plus, _I’m_ literally the problem right now in a way too, and I ain’t gonna trust myself anywhere near the people I love until I can be sure m’not gonna fuckin’ try to murder them.”

Ichigo understood that too, but he was still not convinced.

”How is you going into hiding going to prevent that exactly? What if you are out there alone, and Aizen finds you regardless?”

A slight smirk appears on Grimmjow’s face, and Ichigo felt his heart flutter.

”He coulda not find me last time either.”

”Based on what we learned, he likely knew all along where you were, he just didn’t have to do anything back then.”

Grimmjow snorts, muttering something ugly under his breath, but then he tugs Ichigo closer and buries his nose against the young man’s neck, just breathing in his scent for a bit.

”You gotta trust me Ichigo. I know what I’m doing when I wanna disappear. Gin told me Aizen legit had no clue where I went during that year, and he was almost ready ta go search for me when I came back.”

Ichigo frowns, having heard of that name before.

”Gin was the guy who ran that underground fight club. He was the guy who observed me an’ Nel for Aizen. I ran into him last night when I was plannin’ my next move on what to do.”

Ichigo frowns, not liking that at all. ”How can you trust anything he says then?”

Grimmjow pushes himself back to look at Ichigo in the eyes. The brown eyes gaze up at him with worry, and just why the fuck did almost every person he ended up giving a shit about have to have brown eyes?

Sure, Harribel was an exception to this rule, but still.

"Gin was the one who saved our asses back then."

Ichigo's eyes widen in surprise; this was news. So, did this mean...that the silver haired man was the one who caused the coma to Grimmjow? That actually wasn't reassuring at all, and Grimmjow clearly noticed it from Ichigo's expression, as he huffs again, slightly frustrated.

”Look. If it helps ya, I already contacted the mad hatter, and he agreed ta get some stuff I need trough that weird guy that watched after us back in the cabin.”

Shinji? Ichigo still wondered in what kind of undercover mission he’d been back then, if any.

”I thought you don’t like Shinji.”

Grimmjow snorts at that.

”I don’t, but might as well use ta connections I have.”

”Why though? You said you knew what you were doing...”

The man pauses and looks away for a moment.

”This time is different. I’m going to come back.” He finally states quietly, still not looking at Ichigo in the eyes.

The orangette frowns, not understanding him at first. Then, it slowly dawns on him, the meaning hidden beneath his words. Worry settled at the pit of his stomach, and Ichigo tugs the man closer, holding him firmly, mingling his fingers into the blue hair.

”Grimm...”

”T’was bad. Back then. But....I couldn’t just abandon Nel like that; I was too used ta looking after her, so I didn’t, in the end.”

The man mutters, burying his face against Ichigo’s neck for a moment, enjoying the way the young man combed through his hair in a soothing gesture.

”You better not do that to us this time either.” He half orders, half begs from the man, who lets out a slight, tired chuckle and holds him closer for a moment.

”I won’t. In the end I’m not really a quitter.”

He eventually lets go and looks at Ichigo up and down, flashing a slight, mischievous smirk at him.

”I got somethin’ ta look forward to.”

Ichigo just huffs, but a smile creeps up his face too as he wipes his eyes.

”I’ll be waiting for you, then.”

They just stood there in silence, in the middle of the lone graveyard, and Ichigo could not stop but wonder, the twists and turns in their lives that led up to this moment. So many things, if happened differently, could have ended up changing how things were now.

Had his mum gotten Grimmjow out of there when he was a child, they’d likely grown up together.

Had he not gone out that night, he’d never met him and Nel.

”I hafta go now.”

Grimmjow sighs finally, stuffing his hands into his pockets. Ichigo moves closer to give him one last kiss to his cheek, figuring if he did it on his lips it would make it harder for them both.

”You better come back in one piece.” He tells the man sternly, who just chuckles and turns to head out from the way he came.

”See ya around, Berry.” Ichigo glares after him, but a warm smile was already spreading on his face, even if it was bittersweet.

They’d see each other again, eventually.

Grimmjow did not break his promises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy strawberry, we are almost DONE with this story. I never thought I'd make it, but here we are, second last chapter.  
> The next chapter will be the epilogue, and then this is done.   
> I can finally continue working on the other fics I have in progress, I just wanted to finish this first.  
> I figured after the shit that happened in the last chapter, I had to do a timeskip and have our boys take a break from their relationship to get their shit together properly.   
> Also.  
> I feel like I need to mention this, but in case you didn't already realize, Aizen has not really appeared in this story, and there was a reason for this; the fic isn't about the big bad guy vs the good guys, it's about the journey of these two, the grumpy cat and the sour strawberry.   
> It was always more about that than defeating Aizen, hence he hasn't really been active in the current timeline, only appearing in flashbacks.


	23. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been five years.  
> The cat finally comes home.

Ichigo gazed outside of the window, lost in thought.

The cafeteria was full of chatter, though not as loud as high school had been.

He was sitting on his usual table, next to a window at the left side of the lunch room. Some fellow students greeted him as they passed by, but left the orange haired male alone otherwise, knowing he preferred to be by himself when he was gazing out of the window like that. His phone beeps, and Ichigo glances at it. It was a message from Orihime; she was currently on a field trip with her group.

After graduating high-school, Inoue had decided to study to become a teacher for kids, which suited her fairly well given she got along with children. Her class was currently visiting Tokyo.

_”How are you today Kurosaki-kun?”_

She had a habit of asking that a lot from him, even after all these years.

”Fine, a little tired. Unohana san is a scary teacher.”

Ichigo was studying medicine, which had surprised no one given his family history. Unohana was their main teacher, and while she was really good one, there was just something slightly freaky about the constantly smiling woman. They chatted briefly, just talking casually about this and that, until Orihime brings up a more serious topic.

_”Have you heard anything from him yet?”_

It was a routine question at this point that all of his friends asked when they saw him or messaged him. After learning the whole story and discussing it trough multiple times with Ichigo, his friends had come to terms with the bond he'd developed with the blunet without their knowledge. Given how he usually spoke about him, and how well his friends knew Ichigo, it was easier for them to accept it than what one might have thought.

Ichigo pauses and turns his gaze back to the window.

Five years.

It’s been five years since, and Ichigo had not seen him even once.

The first half a year after that meeting on the cemetery had been the hardest.

He’d still been dealing with the severe trauma, and sleeping troubles. After that it began to get better thanks to the psychiatrist’s efforts and him opening up more to his friends and family. He’d eventually gone to see Nel and Harribel, informing them once and for all that he did not blame either of them about what had happened.

After that, he’d occasionally called them, just to ask how Nel was doing.

She’d gotten better, although her exact memories never returned, and it was likely better that way, her not remembering the horrors she went through in Aizen’s laboratory.

Talking about the madman.

There had been huge news last year; he’d finally been caught, taken out by one of his former subordinates - Gin - as well as another, mysterious person nobody really knew who he was. The silver haired man had refused to reveal his partner’s identity, but Ichigo had a feeling he knew who it had been, and the police likely knew it too.

There had been a shootout, which resulted in Aizen’s death; no one knew exactly who shot him, but Ichigo likely knew the answer to that as well. He hoped it had been for the right reasons this time.

Rest of his secret empire had dissolved overtime, fracturing into smaller groups of criminals the force was still hunting down.

Back then, Ichigo had expected him to come back finally.

But he hadn’t.

Strangely enough, Ichigo had not felt as upset about it as he’d thought he would. Perhaps because by now, he was used to waiting. Plus, he was older now, he was more patient. Even if Grimmjow would never come back, he would not mind, as long as he knew the man was alive and well. The fact he’d likely been with Gin back then indicated he was fine. Plus, Ichigo had a gut feeling someone, likely Urahara, would have known and told him if something bad had happened.

Funnily enough, it seemed that no news was good news. 

Another beep, reminding him he was still chatting with Orihime.

”Still nothing.”

_”Do you think...he will come back?”_

Ichigo did not blame her for the skepticism.

It had been a long time, and after the news about Aizen, everybody had expected him to show up, but he never did. It was almost eight months since Aizen’s defeat, and still nothing.

”Who knows at this point. I don’t really mind if he won’t, as long as he’s okay.”

_”You have always been so nice, Kurosaki-kun.”_

Ichigo could not stop but smile. Then, he glances at the clock, realizing he was late from class. He quickly sends her a reply telling her he had to go, and gets up, hurrying out of the cafeteria. Nobody wanted to deal with Unohana when they were late from class.

 

 

 

By the time his classes for the day ended, Ichigo was exhausted. He takes the bus home, noting it did not have much people at this time, aside from some drunken man drooling asleep on his seat, and another one sitting at the back, face partially covered by a hat and a scarf. Ichigo slumps near the entrance, sighing as he leaned against the glass. The bus doesn’t quite take him to the front door of his apartment; instead he gets out near a park, usually walking through it to reach his house.

It was not too far from their family home, but Ichigo was honestly glad to have more of his own space now. He loved his family dearly of course, but he was already 26, which meant he needed more of his own space at times.

After walking for a while, Ichigo notes the man wearing a beanie had also gotten off on the same stop.

He doesn’t turn to look at him, just walks towards the lake in the middle of the park, stopping at the wooden fence surrounding it and leaning against it. It was already dark, but thanks to the snow covering everything and the city lights shining, it was not pitch black.

The surroundings were almost serene.

The man following him leans his back against the railing, and lights a cigarette, the familiar smell of it making Ichigo smile a bit.

”Those things are still bad for your health.”

The man hums, blowing smoke out of his lungs and watching it float in the air, slowly turning into dirty snow that was blown away by the wind.

”Five years and you still nag at me.”

Ichigo chuckles quietly, not turning to look at him. A hand reaches for the hair at the back of his head, just playing with them a little. His hair had grown much longer over the years, now reaching his shoulders. Ichigo usually kept it tied at school.

”A doctor, huh? Sounds about right, ya always liked takin’ care of people.”

Ichigo finally glances at his companion, noting Grimmjow’s voice was perhaps slightly lower than before, but otherwise he looked about the same. His blue hair was longer too though, more strands peeking out from beneath the beanie.

”Having reckless morons like you around, doctors are needed.” Ichigo remarks, leaning his head against his palm with an amused smile.

Grimmjow huffs and rolls his eyes at that, smoking his cigarette some more, before releasing another cloud of ash into the skies, turning his head to look at him properly. Ichigo notes his eyes were now full on cat-like, almost if he’d stopped trying to hide it. Ichigo did not really mind, they looked beautiful in his eyes regardless. It was a sappy thing to say yes, but Grimmjow had already informed Ichigo of his syrupy tendencies, so he was beyond caring at this point.

”I kinda expected ya to be mad at me.”

”For not showing up right after Aizen was gone? Grimm, do I look like a clingy girlfriend to you?”

The man flashes him a smirk, charming as ever.

It no longer made Ichigo blush like crazy, but it did make him feel warmer.

”Well ya did cling ta me a lot back then...”

Ichigo rolls his eyes and moves away from the fence, walking closer until he could place his hand against Grimmjow’s chest. It was the same jacket he’d worn back in the graveyard, though it no longer sagged, indicating he’d gotten his muscle back, which was a good thing.

”Did you inform Nel already that you’re back?”

”Yeah. Said I won’t drop by right away though.”

Grimmjow’s hand sneaks up to mingle Ichigo’s hair at the back of his neck, his touch warm despite the cold air and the fact he had not been wearing gloves. Another metahuman quirk Ichigo supposed.

”Drop by? So you’re still planning to go somewhere?”

Grimmjow gazes at him quiet for a moment, then gently coaxes him closer, planting an ash-tasting kiss to Ichigo’s lips.

There was nothing dramatic to it, not like there would have been years ago. Suddenly it felt like no time had passed at all.

”I kinda like traveling around, doin’ my thing ya know.”

He admits once they separate, still keeping his warm hand on Ichigo’s neck.

The younger male hums, leaning closer so he could press against the blunet properly.

”Do they know where you are?”

Grimmjow took a moment to understand whom he was referring to.

”Nah. After Aizen was done for, they lost track of me. On purpose I’d say, given Shinji’s last message to me.”

Grimmjow digs out his phone and shows a text to Ichigo, which instantly makes him laugh.

 

_”See ya around sometime, crotch-kicker. Say hi to Ichi the next time ya go snuggle him.”_

 

”I swear, that guy is either crazy, or is legit dumb.” Grimmjow huffs, but he did not sound too hostile anymore.

”He’s just socially awkward, cut him some slack.” Ichigo chuckles, kissing his cheek and holding his lips there for a brief moment, before leaning back to look at Grimmjow in the eyes again.

”Mind to come for a visit?”

The man rolls his eyes, but smirks regardless.

”Yeah, always up for ya, berry.”

Ichigo smacks his head lightly with a laugh, and grasps his arm, beginning to walk towards Ichigo’s house together.

Once in there, the young man puts on coffee for them both, while Grimmjow shakes off his excess clothes. He was wearing a sleeveless white shirt beneath, making Ichigo snort; of course he would not feel the need to dress properly for the cold weather. He then notes the man had a new tattoo on him, on top of the panther and the number six on his back.

A phoenix, starting from his left shoulder-blade and going down his arm.

It had a fiery orange color to it, similar to Ichigo’s hair, as well as golden brown eyes.

”I thought you said I was a bunny.”

The man lifts eyebrow, then glances at his arm, quickly realizing what Ichigo meant.

”What makes ya think it’s you?”

The man asks from him casually, but the amused smile and the warm tone in his voice made it clear that the phoenix indeed represented Ichigo.

”Call it a hunch.”

Grimmjow shakes his head, muttering something under his breath with a smile, before slumping on Ichigo’s couch and turning on Tv like he owned the damn place. Normally Ichigo would have been annoyed by such behavior, but this time it was just endearing, namely because it was familiar. After a moment, he joins Grimmjow, handing him his coffee.

They chat for a bit; with Ichigo telling him about his school and the scary fucking teacher they had to deal with.

”She’s good, but boy she’s scary. I swear she’s gotta have some sort of evil twin sister that takes her place each time someone screws up.”

Grimmjow laughs at that, arm slumped over the backrest, behind Ichigo. The young man was sitting against his side, coffee mug in hand and his legs covered by a warm blanket. It was cozy and relaxing, both of them finally free from any sort of inner demons.

”Maybe she’s secretly one of us.”

”If she was, I’d be worried for the entire world.” Ichigo jests, drinking his coffee. Grimmjow chuckles, figuring he was likely right if what he told him was remotely the truth.

The conversation shifts towards Nelliel now, and Grimmjow reveals to Ichigo that Urahara had developed a special kind of serum that helped to normalize her strength, making her less likely to break and accidentally hurt people of she ever had fits again.

”Nel loves it, she finally feels like she’s just a normal girl and not some weirdo.”

”Did you think of asking Urahara to give you a dose too?”

Grimmjow turns his gaze aside for a moment, clearly contemplating on his answer.

”Nah. I’m...I guess I’m more comfortable with my weird ass powers than she was with hers. Besides I’ve learned to control it much better now.”

”No longer clawing the carpets and bedsheets?”

Grimmjow rolls his eyes at that, and then looks at Ichigo with a slight smirk.

”I can’t promise anything about that last one when it comes ta you.”

Ichigo snickers at that, no longer blushing about the suggestive comment. Grimmjow did not seem to mind not having him turn red like a tomato anymore. He doesn’t tell Ichigo much of his own adventures from the past five years, likely not ready to share them. Ichigo was fine with that.

He did have energy to bitch endlessly about Shinji’s weird behavior, and Gin’s creepy ass mannerism.

The orange haired male watches him rant, not really listening to his words, but his voice.

He’d missed it.

Eventually, Grimmjow tires himself with all of his complaining, and they watched the Tv in silence, with Grimmjow leaning his head against Ichigo’s. Their coffee mugs sat on the coffee table seemingly forgotten now as they just preferred to sit beside one another in silence. Eventually though, he starts nuzzling the orange hair, and as Ichigo shifts, the man leans down to capture his lips.

The young man responds to it, and eventually climbs into his lap, wrapping his arms around Grimmjow’s neck firmly.

The man slips his under Ichigo’s shirt, trailing the warm skin there with his fingers while he nipped Ichigo’s lower lip playfully. His other hand sneaks up to mingle into the fiery locks, and Ichigo lets out a pleased moan as Grimmjow tugs on them slightly.

Ichigo pushes back a little, and his eyes drift towards the new tattoo, following it’s outline with his fingers.

The blue eyes keep examining his face, and Ichigo could sense the hunger radiating from them. He shifts his gaze back at Grimmjow and presses a kiss on his jaw, trailing up to his ear. The blunet was lightly surprised about Ichigo’s actions, as in the past he had not been this brave when it came to stuff like this. That had been years ago however, and it was clear the fiery haired man had matured since.

”I’m not having you mess up my couch. Bedroom, _now.”_

He whispers into Grimmjow’s ear, nipping it lightly.

The man chuckles at that and places an open mouthed kiss on Ichigo’s neck, before getting up and carrying him to the bedroom, dropping Ichigo down to the bed only to climb over him again, pressing their lips together again with a much more heated exhange. This time, he did not bother trapping Ichigo’s hands, wanting to thoroughly enjoy the feel of those hands roam all over him, and Ichigo did not disappoint.

He easily got rid of Grimmjow’s shirt and raked his nails down the man’s back, making him shudder and press him harder down against the mattress. Ichigo responded by biting his lip, then wrapping his legs around Grimmjow’s waist to press them closer to one another.

Grimmjow near purrs in approval as he feels Ichigo’s hand drift up to mingle into his hair, tugging on it firmly. It was much more fun, having his companion participate actively like this. He gets rid of Ichigo’s shirt and nuzzles against his neck, nipping at the skin there.

It felt so good to touch him like this, after such a damn long time.

The man shifts a little, causing some friction between them, and Ichigo moans out loud as he feels the arousal press against him, not even a hint if bashfulness in him like he had in the past. Grimmjow slides his hands down to Ichigo’s hips, and pushes up lightly to gaze down at him.

He used to think Kurosaki was adorable, and he still was to some degree.

But seeing him now, older, more mature, and definitely a hundred times more confident.. fuck he was downright _sexy_ now.

”Like what you see?” Ichigo comments amused upon noticing his slightly admiring gaze.

Grimmjow snorts and leans down, trailing a line up his neck, all the way to Ichigo’s ear, making him shudder in delight.

”Don’t get so cocky. It’s not like that’s news anyway.”

Ichigo chuckles at that, but it soon dissolves into a moan as Grimmjow presses his hips against him. After a few more fervent kisses, Grimmjow gets rid of last bits of Ichigo’s clothing, focusing on worshiping his legs again, trailing his skin with his tongue and lips. Ichigo chuckles about it at first, but by the time Grimmjow reached his thighs, he was moaning.

Even now, his legs were still a sweet spot.

Eventually, Grimmjow shifts up to look at Ichigo again. His skin was finally flushed, but not in the same manner it used to, back then. He did not look embarrassed at all, looking back at Grimmjow with an amused smile, though his eyes were about as hungry as Grimmjow’s. The man leans down to kiss him, softer this time, and lets his lips trail down Ichigo’s jaw and to his neck, making the younger male close his eyes and sigh pleased. Grimmjow shifts again, sliding his hands back down to Ichigo’s hips, kissing his shoulder.

”Ya okay with this?”

He asks quietly against the smooth skin, feeling his companion slip his fingers into his hair again with a soft hum.

”Well aren’t you being courteous today, kitty.” Ichigo snickers at the way Grimmjow nips his neck in retaliation, then nuzzles into his hair.

”Yeah. I’m good.”

 

 

 

He moved slow and easy, not because he was worried he’d end up hurting Ichigo, but because he did not feel like there was a need to rush things.

Ichigo kept gazing up at him with his warm brown eyes, soft look in them that was saturated with pleasure. He kept brushing Grimmjow’s hair, tracing his jaw with his fingers, examining the man’s face quietly while moving his hips in rhythm with his companion.

At times, when Grimmjow hit a particular sweet spot, Ichigo would gasp lightly and close his eyes briefly, letting pleasure rattle his body before opening his eyes again and smiling at him, even reaching up to brush their lips together.

It was somehow much more intimate than anything they’d ever done before, and Grimmjow did not mind it one bit. Ichigo’s fingers traced the outline of his new tattoo again, eyelids half-closed as his eyes followed the movement of his fingers. As another, more intense wave hit him, Ichigo closes his eyes fully with a gasp, his fingers stopping briefly as he frowns.

Once he opens them again, Grimmjow notes there was a bit of mischief in them, and the younger male suddenly places a hand on his chest, flipping them around so he could straddle Grimmjow’s hips.

”Ya sure have gotten braver, huh?’ Grimmjow chuckles at that, before he was silenced by Ichigo’s lips.

”Can’t always stay a blushing virgin, can I?” The younger male snickers at him, before shifting so he could let Grimmjow continue what he’d been doing.

Ichigo keeps looking down at him while moving his hips, and fuck it felt good to let him lead for a change. Grimmjow props himself up to his elbows so he could reach Ichigo’s lips, and they kiss for a long time, up until the younger male let out a loud gasp, tilting his head back lightly as his lips fell open in a breathless moan.

He had not done anything like this for years now, so it was actually a bit more overwhelming than what he’d expected.

Still though, Ichigo enjoyed every bit of it, and he leans down briefly to kiss Grimmjow again, before slipping down his neck, onto his shoulder.

He traces the phoenix tattoo with his tongue now, and he could feel Grimmjow growl lowly at that, his entire body shuddering as he felt it. Ichigo gasps as the man hits his sweet spot harsher now, and he has to lean back and press down hard on Grimmjow’s hips, his whole body feeling like it was made of molten heat.

 

 

Eventually, he finds himself lying on top of Grimmjow in a boneless heap, enjoying the last waves of pleasure rattling his body. After a moment, Grimmjow brings his arms around the warm heap on top of him, gently scratching Ichigo’s hair.

”I missed you.” Ichigo admits quietly after a moment, nuzzling against Grimmjow’s neck.

The man hums, likely not surprised. He nuzzles into the orange locks for a bit, before shifting and turning to his side, tugging the sheets over them.

Ichigo cuddles against him with a content smile, kissing his jaw before settling his head at the crook of the man’s neck.

”Right back at ya.” Grimmjow mutters after a moment, his voice sleepy.

Soon enough, they both were out cold, content resting beside one another.

 

 

 

In the morning, Ichigo finds that Grimmjow was still asleep, so he proceeds to tug on a shirt alongside his boxers - the shirt was Grimmjow’s, and he did it on purpose - to go and make coffee for them both.

Checking his phone, he noted they’d slept late, but given it was weekend it did not matter so much.

There was a message from Orihime on the phone again, reminding him that they were supposed to see with Rukia, Chad and Renji later that day.

”I might have to skip it today, Grimmjow’s here.”

It did not take that long for her to respond.

_”Is he ....alright?”_

”Same healthy dickhead as always; don't worry he's been behaving well.”

Ichigo almost jumps as feels arms wrap around him, and Grimmjow peeks at his phone, snorting as he saw the response Ichigo had sent.

”Told ya you have a shitty taste in men.”

Ichigo just laughs and leans back against the man, checking the reply he got from Inoue.

_”I guess we see you later then? Please do call us if you need anything.”_

"I will. Don't worry Inoue, I'm more than fine right now."

Grimmjow watches the exchange of messages quietly for a moment.

”They still think I wanna kill ya or something?” Ichigo shakes his head, tilting it to kiss his cheek.

”No. They know the whole story now. They’re just being cautious given what we went through.”

Grimmjow hums at that, understanding it honestly. He nuzzles against Ichigo’s hair for a bit, before letting go of the young man to let him put the coffee on and make breakfast. He did not comment on the fact Ichigo had stolen his shirt, figuring there was no point to it.

”So, what are you going to do now?”

Ichigo asks from him after he was done eating, drinking his coffee. Grimmjow had lit a cigarette for himself, apparently he was still a heavy smoker, which was hardly surprising. He likely did it just to piss health conscious people off, he was a dick like that.

”Well. Tia now owns the bar the old man used to. After he retired he handed it over ta her, an’ the joint is even more popular now. She’s got her hands full.”

”Is she considering to hire you as an official doorman who throws bad behaving people out?” Ichigo asks with a snicker, gaining a snort from Grimmjow.

”I’d do that anyway.”

”But you’d get paid this time.”

”Harribel bosses me around enough already.” Grimmjow mutters, taking a drag from his cigarette.

Ichigo reaches over the table for his hand, and Grimmjow doesn’t oppose to the touch, turning his gaze to look at the paler fingers covering his.

”Regardless of what you intend to do, you always have a place for you here.”

Ichigo reminds him gently, gaining a slight smile from the man.

”I dunno. I just feel like I’m not meant to really stick by at one spot for long.”

”It makes sense; given you are a giant cat basically.” Ichigo comments with a chuckle, and Grimmjow looks at him with lift eyebrow.

”Ya know, I kinda thought the idea of me not sticking by would bother ya.”

”Perhaps back then, but I’m older now, Grimm. I understand that for somebody who spent most of his life locked up, both metaphorically and literally, a freer lifestyle is what you crave.” Ichigo explains softly, now holding Grimmjow’s hand with both of his. Grimmjow examines him quietly for a moment.

”Ya don’t hafta keep waitin’ fer me.” He finally states softly, shifting his hand to caress Ichigo’s knuckles with his thumb.

”I’m not. As long as I know you’re out there, alive and well, I’m content.” Ichigo explains with a smile, brushing through his positively messed up hair.

”Besides, given the profession I’ll be going, I won’t necessarily have much time for a full-on relationship anyway.”

Grimmjow hums, figuring Kurosaki was not entirely wrong; doctors were busy as hell, both the good and the wicked, he knew first hand. He had experience with both.

”Just remember to call me yeah? And visit at times.” Ichigo half-orders him again, making the man chuckle and roll his eyes.

”Is that somehow important for my health, doc?”

Ichigo snickers and then gets up, walking to the other side of the table, standing right in front lf Grimmjow so he could place his hands on his shoulders, slipping them behind his neck as he began playing with the blue strands there.

”Yes, it is highly important.”

Grimmjow shifts and brings his arms around Ichigo, tilting his head up as the fiery haired male leans down to kiss him gently.

”Really, call me.”

The man hums with a slight nod, before tugging Ichigo to sit down on his lap, kissing him properly now.

It was pretty clear neither of them would get outta the door before another round in the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOO BOY  
> we are done.  
> FINALLY done.  
> I made it to the end, I can't believe I actually finished this monster of a story.  
> Not because I hated writing it, but because I kept getting stuck with it, and turning the plot around at one point, thus confusing myself briefly (not a good idea)  
> So, I decided to do the ending like this as I could not imagine Grimmjow really settling down like that. He's a rebel who does his own thing. Especially in this AU, I feel he'd rather travel around given he first spend his childhood locked in a lab, later at an orphanage, then stuck in his home metaphorically speaking, unable to leave because he had to watch after poor Nel.  
> he's gonna go out there now dammit, even the sweet sour strawberry ain't gonna stop him!
> 
> Also, thank you for all the comments and kudos, I was super happy to see a lot of people enjoyed this story and liked my portrayals of the characters. It keeps me writing, seeing people enjoy the stories I come up with, so thank you again to all of you readers, for joining me to this wild ride, and I hope to see you in the future too regarding to any future fics I may write.


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